It’s a week before Halloween, one of Jeonghan’s favorite celebration because his boyfriend – Mingyu – always surprise him with his new and stupid trick. Like their first Halloween of being together, Mingyu pretended he can’t talk because a Zombie ate his brain. It was nonsense but Jeonghan played along. He tried to guess what Mingyu wanted through his gestures. It was fun. But the most fun time was last year Halloween, Mingyu pretended someone robbed their house and he pretended to be dead, laying on the floor with fake blood and fake knife. It got Jeonghan cried for an hour.

“I love you so much I can’t even think about living without you, please don’t put this kind of act again. I’m scared,” Jeonghan looked up. He cried as he pulled Mingyu closer to him by Mingyu’s collar, scared that the taller might leave him alone.

“I’m not going to leave you, I’m promise,” Mingyu kissed Jeonghan’s cheek as he wiped Jeonghan’s tears gently. And the night ended with the lovers cuddling in front of the big window on their bedroom, watching the stars.

Jeonghan chuckles dryly every time he remembers that one. It was stupid, scary, but he loves it. He basically loves everything that ends with Mingyu cuddles him through the night. He loves everything that ends with Mingyu tells him he loves Jeonghan so much and some kisses will follow short after that. Jeonghan can tell his cheek turn red right now.
With happy steps, he walks to his front door. A smile shines brightly as he sees a paper bag on his right hand, a gift for Mingyu, simply thanking him for being a great boyfriend for him. Jeonghan fishes out his key from his bag. He twists open the doorknob after he unlocks the door. Shouting ‘I’m home’ cheerfully as he takes off his shoes.

“Mingyu?” He calls out. He looks around. The living room is messy. As expected if you leave Mingyu alone for a day.

But anyway Mingyu doesn’t answer.

“Mingyu, I bought new shoes for you. The one that you told me a few days ago,” Jeonghan puts the paper bag on the sofa. He picks up a black sweater with familiar scent on it. Jeonghan turns to the kitchen. He rolls his eyes as he sees a pair of socks next to the counter.

It must be Mingyu.

He is right. Mingyu is laying on the floor. Fake blood on his stomach, a knife on his stomach – looks perfectly stabbed on his stomach. Mingyu has his eyes closed. Jeonghan walks closer, snickering at the one that pretends to be dead again for this Halloween.

“Wake up, Idiot. We have played this act and I won’t fall for this trick,” Jeonghan kicks Mingyu’s side. Mingyu stays still. Jeonghan groans, “fine, I’ll change my clothes. Please make me a cup of tea, okay?”

Jeonghan turns around. He walks to their bedroom. Before he opens the door, he shouts, “your shoes are on the sofa, Darling.”

Jeonghan’s eyes grow wide in terror as he opens the door. Their bedroom is even messier than the living room. He tries to stay calm as he walks inside, checking the room. The door of his cupboard is broken, seems like someone tried to pull it roughly. Jeonghan’s head turns to the left, to the big window.

“Oh, ,” he mutters. The lock is also broken. Someone ripped the curtain while he wasn’t here. Suddenly everything feels weird. His brain goes blank as he remembers Mingyu on the kitchen.

“No way,” he runs back to the kitchen, wishing it’s not too late. He freezes on the spot while he sees Mingyu still on his previous position. Jeonghan shakes his head, “no way, Kim Mingyu.”

He walks closer to the body. It must be one of the perfect scene from Mingyu, Jeonghan says to himself. He slowly falls down on his knees, his left hand touches the liquid on Mingyu’s stomach, “Mingyu, this is just one of your trick, isn’t it?” His voice cracks.

Mingyu is not moving an inch.

“Mingyu,” a tear falls from Jeonghan’s eye, “please.”

Jeonghan hesitantly touches the knife. A creepy feeling hits him, the knife is the knife that Mingyu bought for him because he told his boyfriend he wanted to try to cook.

“Mingyu, I swear to God if this is one of your nasty tricks, I’ll break up with you,” Jeonghan puts his fingers around the knife. He cries, “wake up, Silly, say something to me!”

Closing his eyes, Jeonghan pulls out the knife from Mingyu’s body. A sudden dizziness attacks him as he opens his eyes and sees the blade with Mingyu’s blood all over it – this time, it’s real blood. Jeonghan throws the knife to his side, in hope the knife will magically disappear and everything is just a nightmare. Jeonghan looks at Mingyu’s dead body before getting up. He runs back to their bedroom, looking around the mess to find a clue about who is the one that stabbed Mingyu like that.

“Why do you have to take Mingyu away from me?” He shouts to no one angrily. His face goes red. Anger and sadness grow furiously inside his chest. Getting back from work and seeing his boyfriend is no longer existing with him in the same dimension is nightmare.

Jeonghan turns around, staring at the bedroom door. How he wishes Mingyu is standing there with his playful grin and telling him it was a perfect scene. Not knowing what to do because everything seems blurry. Sobbing weakly, he drags himself back to the kitchen. He falls down on his knees right next to Mingyu. His palms cover his face as he cries desperately. He misses Mingyu already. He misses someone in front of him right now. Someone that is no longer with him. Someone that is no longer will hug him when he is tired. Someone that jokes around him so much that he forgets his problems. Someone that tells him he is amazing.

“What did I do wrong this time?” He whispers between his tears. He places his palm on Mingyu’s cheek. It’s cold and Jeonghan doesn’t know is it cold because the weather or the other reason. He caresses Mingyu’s cheek lovingly, “I thought you promise me to never leave me alone.”

A series of great moments they shared play on Jeonghan’s brain. All the kisses, hugs, fights, the nights they spent together, everything. They make Jeonghan cries even more, the thought of not being able to simply living with Mingyu hurts him.

Jeonghan brings his face closer to Mingyu. He presses his nose close to Mingyu’s nose, breathing the scent of Mingyu for the last time. He whispers weakly, “Baby, how am I going to live?” Tearing up, he kisses Mingyu’s forehead – he used to not be able to do that except when the younger is sleeping because Mingyu is so tall and Mingyu would a lot. He hums a soft melody as he goes to Mingyu’s right ear, a familiar melody of their favorite song. Jeonghan unconsciously grabs a hold on Mingyu’s shirt as if it will bring Mingyu back to life.

“I’m sorry,” Jeonghan mumbles as he kisses Mingyu’s cheeks softly. Surprisingly it doesn’t feel weird for him to kiss a dead person. It feels like a farewell, but it feels right. Guess he is just missing Mingyu that much.

“I really want to trade my soul so you can live longer than me,” he stares at Mingyu’s closed eyes. He will miss those dark brown eyes. He will miss the way those eyes sparkle everytime Mingyu tells him his favorite TV series. He kisses those eyelids longingly.

“I love you, I love you so much. You’re not even dead for a day and I missed you so much. This is too much,” Jeonghan’s tears fall down again from his eyes, “I’m going to hunt down whoever took you away from me. I’m promise.”

In so much love and pain, Jeonghan kisses Mingyu’s lips, pretending the taller kisses him back like he always did. Jeonghan whispers his goodbye lovingly to Mingyu’s lips softly.

***

After discussing with Jihoon and Jisoo, Jeonghan decides to have a memorial event for his beloved one on the Halloween. It’s also Mingyu’s favorite holiday. He takes care of the memorial event by himself, he wants everything is done with his own hands. He prepares Mingyu’s favorite food and flowers. He wants to feel Mingyu around him once again.

“Jeonghan,” Jisoo knocks on the bedroom door. The bedroom is neat and clean right now. Jeonghan called a maid to take care of it yesterday.

“Yes, Jisoo?” Jeonghan answers. He is standing in front of the full-body mirror, wiping his tears once again.

“The guests are here. Won’t you come out and greet the guests?”

Jeonghan lets out a sigh, “I will meet them in a few minutes. Thanks, Jisoo.”

Jisoo mumbles an okay before leaving Jeonghan behind the door.

Jeonghan takes a look at his reflection. He wears Mingyu’s favorite sweater under his coat. The sweater smells like Mingyu and he loves it. A cold wind blows even though the window closed. Jeonghan looks at the his back on the mirror. A familiar figure stands there with a wide playful grin. That figure mouths a hello to him.

Jeonghan gives the figure a weak smile as he tries to stop crying, “you’re here? You want to meet your friends?”

He nods.

Jeonghan sobs, but he pushes himself to smile widely, “I’ll be out there in a minute, Kim Mingyu. I’ll tell your friends you love them.”

A ghost of Mingyu smiles. He mouths an ‘I love you so much’ to Jeonghan before disappearing. Jeonghan closes his eyes, holding back his tears as he feels a cold wind on his cheek, “I love you too, Mingyu. I love you so much."