Year 6, Middle School.

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In the middle of the room sat two figures covered with a white cotton and polyester mixed sheet. There was light eminating from underneath, and laughs with giggles being heard in the night of a hazing summer. With whisps of voices, telling each other secrets, and chattering the night away; it was typical for them to get lost in time. "And she said, 'only those true of light can come pass.' Indicating those who lived a truthful life could come and live in paradise with her. When I looked back from the scent she waved at me, I spoke in realization -- 'oh, I'm in ecstacy.' From the white flowers underneath my feet, there flashed I remember there may be a sharp thorn on the other side, but I will still reach with my hand. The moment I approach, as if I'm under a spell, I began to see the light -- 'I will love you till Kingdom Come.'"

"...Eh? That's how the story ends?" The younger girl reaches for the book to flip through the pages as she held the flashlight between her lips, brows furrowed together with thumbs b the spine of the literacy. "But what happens after that?"

"I don't know, honestly." The older girl chuckles at the wiggles of their source of light before taking the flashlight from the younger's mouth, then holding it up like a normal person would. "I really like the book though. It ended with the title of the book. 'Kingdom Come.' Some sort of afterlife, free from negative." Her fingertips trailed the outline of the book, letting her eyes roam along the object as if it were her long treasure. "Do you think maybe something like this is actually real?" 

"Do you always ask questions, bear?" 

"Well, I mean.. I just find it weird that there's no perfect true ending. The main character seemed pretty happy with the Prince..."

"Then tell me, how did you want the story to end?"

"Oh! That's simple! A love story ending! It was going to head that way anyway with how the girl and the Prince were feeling for one another."

Albeit true, the story ends with the female character on the line between real life or her own profound paradise. There's an underlying story, where the girl had previously hidden her emotions about her true lover to pursue a more welcomed lover instead. Her true lover still loves her despite seeing her fall for someone else, of greatly status and masculinity. The true lover soon suffers from heartache and takes their fall in life, passing to the heavens peacefully while the female character remains breathing, but it only causes her strife. As months continues, the female character has realistic dreams of a place she wishes to have had -- a place with her. A place with her true lover. And the reader is left to decide what ending they truly want to have, it's ambiguous and unresolved.

This gave insight to Irene, about how her dear friend's thought process actually is. 

"You think so?"

"Yeah, I would have liked an ending like that a whole bunch more."

The elder just granted a small smile and reached up to ruffle the younger's hair, a chuckle following afterwards.

"We'll just say that's the ending. Okay?"

But those words were just comfort. They felt bitter on the tip of her tongue and came accompanied with the pain in her chest.

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"I still can't believe we're in different classrooms." Irene placed herself into the empty seat in front of the younger's desk, propping her arm up on the table and laying her cheek into her palm. "Unnie, we're three weeks into the semester..." Seulgi's lips turned up into a smile as she reached over, ruffling the elder's hair and then giving her a poke on the nose. "I know we've been together in every class since fourth grade. We can surpass this! Besides! It's only home room!" 

"And literature, history.."

"Music..."

"All of them, actually."

Irene watched the younger retract her hand to place it onto her nape, rubbing it out of shyness and the avoidance of being wrong. "Yeah, every single class. I can only talk to you during break and lunch-- which! I'm very fortunate to have!" 

Seulgi's voice shows enough gratitude as it was nearly high pitched and jumbled. 

And Irene only sighed. 

It was a first for them to not be in a class together, or much less, any class. 

Surely, two years of straight classes -- spending eight hours of the day with one another, and many more after that due to being neighbors, it should have been a piece of cake to suffice for the alloted six hours apart from each other. That is excluding break and lunch. 

Despite knowing this, the feeling Irene has about this is unsettling.

"It'll be fine, unnie. We'll be okay!"

She doesn't like it.

"Unnie?"

She really doesn't like it.

"Hello? Unnie?"

Irene blinks, finding a hand in front of her and her eyes trail along the arm of whom the hand belonged to, ending to Seulgi. "You were spacing out... Aigoo, unnie, you should really sleep more." Seulgi only gets a playful roll of eyes back in response to her statement.

"It's not because I don't sleep a lot, I just miss causing trouble in class with you."

"Maybe it's time for a change?"

There's a twinge in her chest. Irene's smile slowly disappears as she repeats the words to herself, knowing that the younger didn't mean any harm to it as she was smiling and giggling. 

But it hurts. 

She knows she shouldn't be thinking negatively about it, she knows.

"You know, time to stop messing around and start growing up a little bit. Class time is class time! We can always make ruckus at home!"

Her features and silence goes unnoticed, something Seulgi has always been oblivious of as she was always go-lucky about nearly everything. It would be a lie to say that everything was fine, because it wasn't. She doesn't feel fine.

"Yeah... yeah."

She musters up a small smile, having it only cause a bit of a more twinge inside of her to which she only relieves by sighing contently.

Irene's name gets called from the door from a familiar voice -- those of her other in school buddies -- telling her that break time was just about to end.

"I'll see you at lunch, right?" She speaks as she gets up, giving the seat back to the respective student and she returns to her classroom after being given a nod from Seulgi to affirm their plans.

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She saved a seat for two by the window, giving a view that leads to the outer courtyard and field. 

After giving her actions earlier a little thought, she came to a conclusion that it may have been better for them to have part during class times. Punishments for such disruptions in class were provided with having to stand out in the hall and given a talk. Or perhaps it came with detention, but either result was unfavorable.

Perhaps it was a little childish of her to do so, but she saved a seat just in front of her for Seulgi. Her other friends protested, but Irene continued. 

"Would you be free later for study group session, Irene?"

Her eyes part with the view she dearly loves and gazes at the girl who asked her, only giving her a response and a tone of silence. "I may have already got my plans filled for the afternoon."

"With Seulgi, right?"

And she nods.

"It never hurts to ask." And they chuckle.

It was known in their group of friends that the two were inseparable. It's never a "one plus one" deal, it's always "get both or none."

It never hurt them, of course, as it was clear to see that no one understands them as much as they understand eachother. Everyone knew it was a one-of-a-kind friendship. To be honest, it did cause some jealousy in the group but that was solved after they tried to separate the two. 

Without them together, they both seemed distant and forced. And so, the group collectively thought it was better to keep them one to avoid this kind of mishap again. It wasn't like both of them together with the group caused any problem; they still included everyone and hung out, had a great time -- it was just an eyesore to see them stuck at the hip.

"Aren't you gonna eat? You know we have like... 20 minutes left."

"I.. was waiting for Seulgi."

"I think you may want to skip on that." 

Irene grows silent, flipping her wrist over to look at her watch and watching the time tick away with a twitch of her brow that signifies her whirling emotions. 

The same pain comes back to her chest.

As if her chest was slowly beginning to fall in on itself with the weight growing more and more, she flares her nostrils and exhales slowly. The pain seemed to go away each time she did it, and luckily did, but it doesn't account for the amount of thoughts spiraling inside of her mind. 

'We made a deal to meet up for lunch...'

'I know Seulgi is forgetful, but not to this extent...'

'No! She's just running late, it's fine.'

And her teeth grits together.

Her rising emotions aren't giving her some time to relax.

The tension between her brows is growing and her body begins growing in temperature from the disappointment and rage that's stirring within her. 

The better half of her says to not worry. This is Seulgi. Her Soulmate. Best Friend. Person above all else that she has entrusted everything with. There's no need to get so worked up about her being late or not coming. It's alright. It's just lunch time and then afterschool, her time will come. 

But this buried side seems to be winning. They are best friends, after all. One shouldn't forget, because what friend would? And they made a deal to meet up at lunch. Mutually, of course. Seulgi's forgetting about her; that has to be the only solution--

"Unnie!" 

Irene snaps out of her own train of thought, looking at the bearish girl in front of her as she realized she just had been idly staring at her watch. A stray number between five and seven minutes have gone by without her realizing it, and she only offers a sheepish smile as she dropped her hand down to her lap. The person across from her only raises a brow and tilts her head in question, but leaves it to be as a smile grows on her lips. 

"I'm sorry I didn't come earlier," her hands come together raising it above her head as she lowered herself a bit. "Some other buddies wouldn't leave me alone..."

The girl only blinks and waves a dismissive hand, covering her previous feature with a smile. "No worries, did you enjoy your time?" She inquires after taking a sip of her drink and slowly gritting her teeth together as she listened to the younger converse about what her events for the past hour had gone. 

"...And then they suddenly talked about boys and everything, and I couldn't say anything. There's no guy I like." The circle of friends all bubbled into a fit of laughter, but Irene remained silent and stared at her lunch.

"Mm! We had really good food. One of the girl's parents packed enough for the whole class." 

And suddenly, Irene wasn't hungry anymore. 

Seulgi notices this and looks at the older with her eyes carefully searching for life in the still figure. "Unnie? Is everything alrigh-" The bell rings and pardons her from finishing her question.

"Nevermind that, we gotta get to class. We'll walk home together, right?" 

There's that smile that always sways her process of thought. 

"You... also didn't eat a bite of your food, you're okay?"

Will she remember this deal?

"I'm just not that hungry, I suppose. But yeah. I'll wait for you at the gate."

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Her hands were together and laid on the smaller of her back, having gained a headache from all of the emotions she had swirled herself into today. Maybe she had been a little too harsh on herself, considering all the impulses and whirls she did. "Ahh, Hyun-ah... what are you doing to yourself..." 

And with that, she leans herself back against the brick wall of the gate barrier, casting her vision towards the sky as it always gave her some peace. 

"Maybe this is just my selfishness?"

"But isn't selfishness a sin according to.."

"Mm.. I'll pray tonight to rid of that. I don't need any of that karma when I'm already punishing myself."

The corner of her lip perked up into a side smirk as she silently chuckled to herself, then she closed her eyes and allowed herself to soak up the warmness of the sun.

She finally had the first breather of the day, letting the calmness seep through her.

Her chest fills with the spring air, and it's as if everything finally fell away. 

No worries. No envy. No jealousy.

She was not one to understand why she acted in such a way, but she's glad they've strayed and gone away.

She always appreciated that the weather was able to have this effect on her, and other time's maybe they do affect her all too much, but in the now -- she appreciated that it gave her a sense of safety.

And slowly, her head lays back against the brick warmed by the sun, letting herself drift off into short bliss.

Irene finds herself drifting off into the vacant space of her mind, flushing out the negatives and blooming, stemming with peace. 

She reminds herself: "It's okay to be jealous. It's okay to be envious. But don't let it overcome your senses."

While all of it is true, she hates the feeling of it existing. She should share, Seulgi wasn't hers to begin with. 

She was not hers. 

She wasn't hers.

She's not hers.

Irene inhales deeply again, feeling the air cleanse her tightening chest.

She realizes that those words often tighten up her emotions.

Well, not just now did she realize it, she just often pushed the thought into the backspace of her mind.

She was hoping to forget about the stinging sensation and grip it had around her heart.

She's just a best friend.

Friends do come and go.

They are not always forever.

She tells herself this time and time again, to try and relieve the pain because she knows not everyone and everything stays together (past experience of lost pets had taught her this one).

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Her chest rises and falls one last time before her eyes open, gazing at the now changing colors of the sky. Lifting her wrist and staring at the time, she just sighs softly and drops her arm back to her side.

She wonders how many times has she lost track when it comes to drowning herself in these kinds of thoughts.

They seemed to happen a lot more often these days, and that is a bit concerning.

The gate had clinked together and a buzz sounded, indicating the locking mechanism had fulfilled its duty.

And yet again today,

Seulgi had not kept her words.

With a heavy heart that seemed to have clawed its way back to existence, her feet had taken their steps forward. Trudging her way back to her home that was still oh-so-conviniently next to the Kang residence.

Her name is called once she crosses the view of the younger's home, which she chooses to ignore and further her steps towards her home, but a hand stops her.

The same hand pulled on her shoulder to force the latter to face the other, their face contorted with slight confusion. "Unnie, where were you?" Irene's eyes fell to the younger's lips, finding the pout on them to which she only replies with a gentle shrug and turning again to continue her path toward her house. But again, the hand is resistent.

"Unnie, I really missed you. I wanted to hang out! You said we'd hang out again after school this morning!" She blinks at the proclaim, rewinding herself back to this morning as she remembers her words with clarity, 'we can always make ruckus at home.' The younger's hand falls to hold onto Irene's, holding it gently as her shoulders had shimmied in a way of persuasive. 

"I'm..actually kind of tired, Seulgi. I still have some homework to do." She doesn't remove her hand, it would be rude of her to do so and it was among the only few attention she had received from the younger all day. 

"...I still believe you should get checked out for how sleepy you are, unnie... It seems more than usual today." Seulgi had invited herself into Irene's arms, to which Irene responds helplessly with a protective hug despite how reluctant she is.

"Tomorrow, then?"

"Tomorrow."

The younger had pulled herself away to reveal that sparkling bearish smile of hers, oozing her sweetest eye smiles as she runs back to her own home with the older waving back towards her as she went. 

She waits until the door is closed. And once it is, her arm immediately falls to her side as she strides with heavy steps back to her home and up to her room. Tossing her school bag onto her desk and not bothering with her homework for the meanwhile, she collapsed onto the bed with a thump. 

"Today was just too exhausting..."

For a few moments, she thinks of the recent meeting and it brings her to a chuckle. She wonders if she's too troubled of an unnie to tell Seulgi how she really felt about being left behind at the gate. 

"Ah, Irene-ah.... you've really outdone yourself today..." Her head shakes gently as she inhales deeply, letting the breath go as slowly as she can before sitting up onto her knees to allow her gaze follow through the window toward the other's house.

"Tomorrow... Yeah, tomorrow."

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A/N: Yeah. So, hey. I KNOW THIS SEEMS RUSHED -- but i've been working on this for months while having this major writing block...

so. I'll just let you guys know that it gets better. I swear.

Until then, thank you so much for staying and checking out the story thus far.

Xumin, out!