One Year Later

Jessica stands there on the huge stage, lights dimmed. Looking down at her pretty red shoes, her sweaty hand fidgeting with the microphone and the other pulling on the hem of her puffy white dress. She has always been nervous before doing live shows, but never as nervous as this one.

It's been a year since they've done a live performance of One Year Later. And now on this Christmas Eve, suddenly their people arrange a performance for them in a Christmas concert. Jessica was opposed to it at first, but she had to agree, anyway, since it's already done and she had no excuses.

She doesn't know why; they meet in the company everyday, do concerts together very often, and sometimes they even star in shows together. But being on stage together, just the two of them, singing their duet?

Jessica just can't face Jinki.

She wouldn't know how to react. She can act, but somehow she forgets how to when she's with him. She goes paralyzed; nervous, tense and suddenly agitated.

It's too late to turn back now. Only a few more seconds until the lights go on and the music plays – she's going to sing with Jinki, together on one stage, to one another.

"We're on in three.. two..!"

Jessica lifts her head up, focusing her gaze on the camera as the intro for One Year Later plays. Taking a deep breath, she begins singing.

It feels like I've dreamed for a long time

For a while I've wandered and wandered

We're standing face to face, just like that day

The beautiful stories we wrote down then

The promises of forever we prayed then

All come back to me one by one

I knew my heart wouldn't be able to take this

For you, I held it back even more

Jessica takes another deep breath.

So, how was your year?

A small interlude comes in, and soon it was Jinki's turn. As he sings, he walks down the stairs he's been standing on the whole time Jessica was singing. He keeps his gaze at the camera, smiling, before closing his eyes. He's been waiting too long for this.

I've lived and tried to forget for a long time

For a while, it seemed like it was okay

But as time passes by, I come to realize

That without you I can't go on

He's at the bottom of the stairs Jessica is standing on, now gazing at her flawless silhouette. He keeps his eyes on her, as she descends, making his way towards him. Jinki wants her to listen closely, because he's singing what he had been holding in for a year long.

Maybe if we were just a little more mature then

Maybe if we knew back then what we know now

Endless regret only repeats itself

I have no will to save myself

But I tightly held all of that in

That's how one year has passed

Jessica is standing within one meter from Jinki now, and he was looking at her while singing. But she can't look back at him. Her body shakes, her expression goes uneasy in the dark. The song isn't over yet, the spotlight will come back to her, but Jessica still can't do anything but try to sing well while looking at the camera.

Are your feelings the same as mine?

Can you give me one more chance?

Jinki had tried looking at her, trying to get her to look at him too. But Jessica didn't, although she was looking everywhere; down, up, left, right, and forward towards the camera, but she didn't look at him at all. It's time for the bridge now, and Jinki has to sing, despite of how broken he felt.

I know now that we can never part

You're the one person I loved and still love

Both Jinki and Jessica's heart are crushed on the last line of the bridge. Both of them wonder if it really is what they are thinking about one another. Both of them have been dying to know. Both of them have waited too long.

If we could have gone back to those good old days

To the days when our love was beautiful and happy

Heartbreaking stories, meaningless arguments

Let's bury them all now

And say we'll never bring it back up

The season changes again

Jinki brings up the courage to look at her once again, pleading for her to look back at him. Instead, Jessica slightly turned away, and that pleading look she got suddenly turns into a sad look. But he still won't stop looking. He wishes that somehow, she would feel it too, the feeling he's having in his heart.

Even when many years pass

Let's ever have the same feelings we have today

The song fades and soon is replaced by applauds from the audience. The lights are dimmed once again, and before Jinki can even speak a word, Jessica rushes to the backstage, leaving him alone, crestfallen and empty.

Jinki bows once again to the audience, before he walks out to the backstage himself, quickly heading to the toilet to splash some water in his face.

"So, what time are you going to finish?"

Jessica plays with her hair as she replies to a certain person on the other end of the line. "I can go now, what about you?"

"Great! See you later at the movies? I'll head there first to buy you popcorn. Non-fat butter, right?"

She chuckles. "Okay, Taecyeon. I have to go change now. Bye."

"Bye, Jessica. I love you!"

Not knowing what to answer, she hums a reply and quickly hangs up. Jessica leans against the wall, sighing.

It hasn't been long since she started going out with Taecyeon, who had been acknowledged by the public as her close friend – they haven't announced it yet. Jessica had always known that Taecyeon has feelings for her, and she can't deny that she has feelings for him too. But right now, she doesn't feel so sure. How can she not reply to an I love you from her own boyfriend? She blames this stupid concert, the stupid duet, the stupid song, and..

"Stupid Jinki."

"I'm stupid?"

Jinki comes out from behind the hall turn, startling Jessica. He's chuckling, and is holding a white towel in his hands.

"Jin – O, Onew.." she stammered, not knowing what to say. "Sorry, I –"

"You haven't changed at all.." he chuckles again. "..except for the fact that you just called me Onew, but you still like to talk to yourself like that, don't you?"

Jessica shifts her gaze down to her feet, avoiding his eyes. "I'm sorry, Jinki.." she whimpers, feeling bad all of a sudden. The feelings from the duet had came back, making her freeze under his warm gaze.

"It was Taecyeon on the phone, wasn't it?" he asks, his tone seeming casual. "Are you guys going to meet up for your movie nights?" 

She can't answer. She just wants to yell and tell him that she can explain, but then again, what's there to explain? Jessica can only nod.

"Oh.. okay. Have fun, then," Jinki says, before turning on his heels and walks away. But Jessica stops him.

"Jinki, wait!" she grabs his hand and drags him into an empty dressing room nearby. After closing the door, she turns to face a confused Jinki.

"What's wrong, Sica?" he asks. Jinki's not a good liar, but he's quite an actor.

"You tell me," she says, her voice suddenly shaking. "You tell me, why are we not speaking to each other anymore, why I can't look at you in the eyes, why can't I say that I love my boyfriend, why are we pretending like nothing's wrong?"

Jinki looks at her with sad eyes, and pulls her into a hug. He doesn't know how to answer her, but he knows that she knows that he wonders about the same thing. Why are they like this?

"What happened, Jinki? It's been so long and I miss you.." she whimpers. "I miss you so much.."

His hold tightens, pulling her closer like he doesn't want to let go, whispering, "I'm sorry, Jessica.. I'm so, so sorry.."

Jessica wiggles out of Jinki's hold, and looks up at him with a faint smile. "No, I'm the one who's sorry," she says. "I shouldn't have been afraid, I shouldn't have been stupid, and I should've believed you. I'm sorry, Jinki.."

He reaches out a hand to caress her cheek, and pulls her closer to him until their lips join in a sweet kiss. Even if it has been one year long, Jinki still felt the sparks. He was sure, now or even a thousand years later, it will always be the same as the first time they kissed.

Even after their lips parted, Jinki and Jessica remain still, forehead against forehead. But she breaks it off. "I'm sorry, Jinki, I can't.."

"But, Jessica.. I –" he stutters, not believing what she just said. But, seeing the firm yet fragile look on her face, makes him understand. "I can't make you stay, can I?"

Jessica doesn't answer, but instead, she hugs him, tightly, once again. "I'd go back to one year ago if I could, Jinki.." she whispers. "But I can't.. not now"

Both of them know it will never be the same, but at least they can try one more time – faking it as if nothing has ever happened before – maybe a little better than what they had done before.

Jinki pries Jessica's hands off of him, and holds them in his arms. It's his last chance in the last year; it nearly killed him, but waiting for another year, and more years to come won't hurt. But she just has to know one thing. "Saranghago ddo saranghaeneun han saram," he says to her. "You're the one person I loved and still love. Forever."

Jessica goes speechless, but Jinki laughs.

"Hey, you're going to be late to the movies if you're still here," he says to her in a casual manner, like nothing had happened before. "I have to go now.. tell Taecyeon I said hey, okay?" Jinki walks to the door, leaving Jessica still standing. His steps are calm despite his broken heart. But a voice saves him – Jessica's voice.

"Jinki.." she calls, and he turns to face her.

"Yeah?"

"Can you wait.. just one more year?" asks Jessica, her eyes pleading. Until I can sort my feelings out. "..Or less. Please?"

Jinki smiles. "I've waited for one year.. I suppose one more won't kill me," he says. "Until next year?"

"Until next year," she nods, and waves goodbye to him as he leaves the room.

Jessica knows what she's supposed to say to her boyfriend, now. And maybe, Jinki and her won't have to wait until one year later.

Copyright and Disclaimer

© hellopsr stories, 2011

My deprived OnSica heart is crying, okay? I was so heartbroken and crestfallen when I saw their OYL performance on the MBC Christmas Concert. Jinki was looking at Jessica the whole time, pleading for her to look at him too, but she kept that sad expression while looking at the camera. I just know that there's something going on between those two.

But anyway! I made this story because.. I just felt that there's something going on, and my mind just somehow wanders to TaecSica vs OnSica, and it's just my overactive imagination and a heartfelt assumption, and it led to this. I hope you all enjoy the story, though!

P.S., HAPPY HOLIDAYS! ♥