Nerely Five years

I remember it was your voice I heard first. Such a happy sound.

I recall the first touch... Hands... The never felt feeling of a fluttering heart

We played... We laughed.... we kissed.... we made love... and we faught

I fell so hard and so fast for you.... It was always only you... just you....

I remember the tears... the heartache... as you said goodbye to me...

Because of your ex... you know... the one who constantly cheated...

So for her... you cheated on me...

I remember the huge argument... It was hard living with my best friend who was your sister....

Seeing your face was too hard everyday...

So I left... I couldn't bear it

I ran 2 hours away... Tired... shattered.... I remember when my friend had to take me to the hospital...

I couldn't eat... I tried... and couldn't... 20 lbs in 2 weeks I had dropped....

I recall your random message... you say you were drunk... but you turned my world upside down... so I ran

600 Miles and 9 hours away... I wanted to escape you... even though you were all I could think of...

I found myself someone else... to pass the time... I secretly hated him... I dreamed of you... My heart ached for you... even two months later...

Every song... every movie... every second... I tried hard to pretend... even when i laid in bed texting back and forth with your sister...

The new guy was mean... so mean... in ways that are still embarrassing to describe...

I couldn't do for him... though for you I was able to do everything...

I found out I was pregnant... I remember all the thoughts that ran through my head... Even when the new guy told me I was going to get an abortion... I refused...

Everyday... I scrubbed... cleaned... walked... scrubbed... cleaned... moved the furniture around... and worked.....

I recall the day his mother flipped out because I missed a piece of dirt behind the litter box... She went crazy and started choking me... She kicked me in the

stomach as I founght to defend the life of my child... I was 5 months... The neighbors called the cops and took her to jail for domestic assault on a pregnant

woman.... I cried and cried as I sat in the floor... I thought of all the horrible thing the new guy had done to me... I missed home... I made a mistake

I recall when your sister found out... not knowing it was really you... She told me to pack my bags... That no matter where I was... or what I had gotten myself into...

that she and her mother would come get me... I agreed... I didn't care about anything else... I just wanted to go home.