Jaehyun couldn’t understand why people were always judging him. It’s not like he did anything wrong or against the law. Is having a boyfriend so bad that he needed to be called names like ‘freak’ or ‘psycho’? Jaehyun knew full well that his lover may not be one to talk much, he doesn’t like to talk to anybody else except him and liked to keep to himself. But a person’s habit can’t change overnight, and Jaehyun’s nosy neighbours shouldn’t put their nose in where they do not belong.

If Kim Dongyoung doesn’t like to interact with other people than so be it.

Jaehyun sighed as he found another piece of red paper stuck on his mailbox that morning. Without sparing a glance, he ripped the paper away, throwing it on the ground. He wasn’t going to let his morning get ruined by a few nasty words by his neighbours. He was supposed to be going on a date with Dongyoung that day. He should probably get ready.

Jaehyun hopped up the stairs two at a time, already thinking about his attire for the date. He’d most probably wear that blue sweater Dongyoung seemed to love so much. He matched his shirt with black jeans and styled his brown hair just how Dongyoung liked it; his bangs covering his forehead. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the numbers on the clock change to 7 in the morning and right at that moment, his doorbell rang.

Jaehyun smiled. Dongyoung, never one to be a second late.

He rushed down the stairs again, running across the neat and tidy living room to the front door, opening it to find his boyfriend smiling brightly towards him. Jaehyun relished the feeling of Dongyoung’s pouty lips on his forehead. After the peck, Dongyoung held out his hand and Jaehyun gladly accepted it, enjoying the familiar touch of his lover.

“Which coffee shop do you prefer today, Dongyoung?” Jaehyun asked, looking down at his boyfriend, smiling when a thoughtful look etched on his face.

Jaehyun chuckled. “Why don’t we go to that new shop down the street? I heard they make real good yoghurt smoothie.” He tugged on Dongyoung’s muscular arm, looking gently at his glittering eyes.

“I’ll learn how to make smoothies, Dongyoung. So you could have a special home-made drink made by me every morning, how about that?” Jaehyun asked.

Dongyoung smiled and nodded. “That would be nice.”

Jaehyun’s smile only grew wider at Dongyoung’s answer. They walked with matched footsteps to the little shop and entered. Jaehyun was greeted with a familiar smell of latte and cappuccino, he missed the nostalgic feeling of coffee and the smell was so overwhelming, like something that was way beyond of Jaehyun’s reach. He instinctively squeezed Dongyoung’s hand, relieved when his lover gave him a warm smile.

They made their way towards the waitress. Jaehyun noticed the way the girl looked at Dongyoung and frowned. Can’t she figure out by the way their hands are intertwined that he’s taken?

Jaehyun cleared his throat, quickly reciting his order while glaring at the shameless waitress.

“Two cups of hot espresso.” Jaehyun said, waiting for Dongyoung to settle the bill but when he didn’t, Jaehyun gave him a questioning look.

“Dongyoung, did you forget to bring your wallet out again?” Jaehyun asked, eyeing the sorry male. Dongyoung scratched the back his head sheepishly, his cheeks tinted pink. Jaehyun sighed, he always asked if Dongyoung had any financial problems but he just wouldn’t tell him anything.

It’s fine, I’ll just pay for today’s date. Just today.

Jaehyun fished out a fifty and placed it on the counter, pushing it towards the waitress. He heard her calling him ‘crazy’ but he did not care. He’s been called that for almost a year now, it’s like breathing air, like a daily routine. Someone could literally beat him to a pulp until his insides bleed and it still wouldn’t be half as painful as—

“Here’s your change. Please have a seat while we make your order.” The waitress brought Jaehyun back to reality. He hurriedly look to his left and a weight lifted off his chest when Dongyoung gave him a questioning look.

“Are you okay? Why don’t we grab a seat first?” Dongyoung asked and Jaehyun smiled, letting himself be led by Dongyoung to their usual seat at the corner of the shop.

Jaehyun stared at Dongyoung’s face, taking in every detail of his face. The way his angular face turns into an adorable round shape when he laughs. The way his front teeth is slightly bigger than the others when he smiles. The way his eyes twinkle when the sunlight is reflected off them.

His short moment was ruined by the same waitress putting a tray down on the side of the wooden table, placing two cups in front of Jaehyun. He frowned when both cups were in front of him. It’s bad enough that Dongyoung is always being ignored, now even the waitresses didn’t even want to serve him. Jaehyun pushed a cup towards Dongyoung, ignoring the weird look the waitress was giving him.

“Freak.” She muttered once again before bringing the tray away.

Jaehyun took a sip of his coffee, closing his eyes in satisfaction as he savoured the sweetness of his drink. The two of them quickly engaged in conversation, Dongyoung showing Jaehyun the rap he created yesterday and asking him what he thought. When it came to the time when comfortable silence fell, Jaehyun knew it was time to go home.

He smiled. “Let’s go home, Dongyoung.”

Dongyoung nodded and stood up, holding out his hand again. Jaehyun inserted his hand inside Dongyoung’s big ones and the both walked back to Jaehyun’s house. When they arrived, Jaehyun frowned when he saw a pair of unfamiliar shoes set recklessly on his porch.

Oh no, Dongyoung hates messy things.

Jaehyun hurriedly bent down and lined the shoes on the rack, making sure both are aligned straight. He threw a cautious look over to Dongyoung, reassured when Dongyoung did not seem to pay attention.

“Dongyoung, I don’t know who did this. Let me go inside and check, okay?” Jaehyun said, slowly turning the knob to his own house.

“Who is there?” Jaehyun called out, eyeing his surroundings carefully. He suddenly jumped when a loud noise came from the kitchen. He immediately ran and widen his eyes when he saw Taeil rummaging inside his refrigerator.

“Taeil, what the hell do you think you’re doing?!” Jaehyun exclaimed, watching in horror as he began putting all the contents of his fridge he had so meticulously arranged the night before carelessly on the floor.

“What else? Trying to whip your back to its senses.” Taeil said, without stopping what he was doing.

Jaehyun couldn’t bear it any longer. He quickly squatted down, putting the bags of vegetables and base powder for Dongyoung’s favourite Chinese dish on his cradled arms.

“How many times do I have to tell you Dongyoung hates messy things?!” Jaehyun cried out, tears threatening to fall out.

“Who the is Dongyoung? Your new guy?” Taeil stopped his action and turned to look at Jaehyun, 

Jaehyun’s jaw dropped. “What do you mean? Dongyoung is my boyfriend for almost two years now. You’re an old friend, how could you not know?”

Taeil suddenly picked Jaehyun up, making him drop everything he was holding. The lid of the base powder opened and the contents spilled out. Jaehyun gasped, seeing how messy the kitchen is.

“Let me go! I have to clean this up before Dongyoung sees it!” Jaehyun declared, struggling against Taeil’s tight grasp.

But Taeil wasn’t having any of Jaehyun’s . He roughly grabbed Jaehyun by neck, pushing him against the wall with a loud thud. Jaehyun felt lightheaded by Taeil’s attack.

“Wake the up, Jaehyun!” Taeil roared. “Lee Taeyong is dead so face it! He. Is. Dead. You hear me?!” He continued to scream in Jaehyun’s face.

Jaehyun heard the metal shield he so carefully wrapped around his heart slowly melt away.

“No,” Jaehyun muttered shakily. “What are you talking about? Who’s Taeyong? My boyfriend is Dongyoung.”

Taeil raised a fist up in the air, before sending a huge punch to the side of Jaehyun’s face. Jaehyun was sent flying all the way to the neighbouring wall, spitting out blood. He laid on the floor, feeling numb all over. He pushed himself back when Taeil came towards him, grabbing the front of his sweater.

“Jaehyun, listen to me. You have no boyfriend. Your only boyfriend is Lee Taeyong. You got together two years ago. Three months ago, Taeyong died in a car accident.”

Jaehyun writhed in pain on his kitchen floor. Tears flowed like a dam. Why is Taeil doing this to him?

“Dongyoung.” Jaehyun begged, looking at the front door. It was still open so Dongyoung should be able to hear the screams and shouts but why isn’t he coming in to help him?

“Dongyoung is just part of your imagination, Jaehyun! Same with that Hansol and Youngho! They’re all fake!” Taeil yelled.

Jaehyun shook his head vigorously, reaching out his hand to the door, fingers shaking. “No, they’re not fake!” Jaehyun shrieked, losing control of himself.

“Jaehyun!”

Taeil sent another punch to Jaehyun’s stomach, forcing the bloodied man to look at him.

 “Think about it, Jaehyun. What do you always do with those boyfriends you have? Do you wake up at 6 in the morning every day? Do you go on a date at 7? Do you always go to the same coffee shop? Do you always talk about the supposed rap they created the day before?”

Jaehyun remained silent.

“That’s what you and Taeyong did on the day he passed away, Jaehyun.”

The metal wounded around his heart corroded and Jaehyun let out the loudest scream he could muster.

Why?! WHY? TAEIL, WHY?!

Jaehyun cried his heart out, forgetting about his waiting boyfriend outside his front door. His tears fell for the way he remembered Dongyoung’s face. It was Taeyong’s. His cries anguished for the way he waited for Dongyoung to pick him up. Jaehyun was waiting for Taeyong. His yells painful for the way he hates dirt. Jaehyun doesn’t mind it but Taeyong does. His head throbbed for the way he adored Hansol’s, Youngho’s and Dongyoung’s pictures on his bedside table. It wasn’t them, it never was. It was Taeyong’s. Finally his heart bled at the thought of Taeyong never coming back. Jaehyun was still holding on to Taeyong.

Jaehyun never bothered when Taeil cleaned up the base powder.

“Let him go, Jaehyun. Stop hurting yourself.” Taeil muttered.

That night, Jaehyun slept in the kitchen.

The next day Jaehyun woke up and his eyes darted to the kitchen clock.

Oh no, it’s already 6:45 in the morning.

He sprang up to his feet, wondering why he passed out in the kitchen. He did not notice the blood on his sweater. He did not notice his clean and tidied kitchen. All he thought about was how, 15 minutes later, he would go out on a date with his boyfriend, Park Jungwoo.

Jaehyun never felt that happy before.