Starry Night by Lee Jin Ah & Onew

She was tired of pretending. It’s like the life that she was living was not her own.

Shinhye dropped her designer’s handbag on the floor and sat on her bed. She scanned her small apartment, the one that she had been living since three years ago and let out a deep sigh. The autumn night was cold, her lips were shivering but she quickly pressed her them together.

How sad… She went out wearing expensive clothes and designer’s handbags but the reality was she couldn’t even turn the boiler on in her house in order to save up money. It’s not that she wanted this, all the things she did was all because of him.

“You’re just a kindergarten teacher? I expect more.”

A soft ‘tch’ escaped from the middle aged lady. Shinhye suddenly felt small while sitting at the dining room with complete set of mahogany furniture. The man beside her should make her feel strong, she was trying to be but sadly, he didn’t say a word to defend her.

“At least, I-I’m making a living.” She answered without looking into the eyes in front of her.

“Yes, Mother. Please let her try.”

That was his only sentence. They were together, his mother approved of him with a heavy heart, she was happy, he was too but that only lasted for a few months. He was sent to the States to manage his parents’ company, leaving her alone to struggle.

It had been two years.

Shinhye brought her fist up and opened her hand. There was a crumpled paper in it and she then, carefully uncrumpled it. She counted the number of zeros and again, her heart broke for the nth time. No, not because of the amount, but by the way his mother insulted her in front of people in the jewelry store.

Her future mother in law paid for everything, she insisted but in return, she could senselessly step on her dignity.

But she couldn’t possibly tell him about it.

The fragile girl threw the piece of paper and stood up from her bed to walk towards her windows. The night was dark but luckily, there were stars but they were overshadowed by the bright street lamps and buildings. Tears fell, she was tired holding everything in, for him, for her feelings for him.

Her thoughts were then shrugged off when the phone in her bag rang. She quickly wiped her wet cheeks and fished for her Samsung Note in her bag.

“Omma?”

“I heard you went to buy engagement rings today with Yonghwa’s mother. How was it?”

She cleared .

“It went fine. Mrs. Yang bought them for us. She picked them out too.” She spoke shakily and went back towards her windows to look at the view. But then, she could hear her mother sigh.

“Shinhye-ya, when is Yonghwa coming back?” Her mother’s voice was tired.

“Soon, Omma. The engagement would be soon.”

“It has been delayed for so long. Think about this again, dear. My heart hurt so much because of that family. Do you want to live your life pleasing that old hag?” Her voice turned into anger. Shinhye almost choked in her tears upon hearing her dear mother.

“I’ll be fine, Omma.”

She didn’t wait for a reply and hung up. It was because she couldn’t hold her tears anymore, she immediately burst into tears and cried like a small girl all by herself.

The fact that she was alone hurt her even more.

The feelings she kept for him for years was the only thing that kept her standing. Shinhye thought he already had her heart when they first laid eyes on each other during an old friend’s wedding long ago. He confessed first and she was the happiest girl at that time.

But being the only son in his family made his mother cared for him a little too much. She never showed tha