jimin's had a little too much to drink. 

at the age of 19, she discovers she's not all that great with her alcohol intake. apparently she takes after her older brother, park jinyoung, who's a fairly weak drinker himself. damn genetics. she can just see him making fun of her now, laughing that annoying signature-older-brother laugh of his. but she doesn't care. because with intoxication, comes not caring, and so she lets loose. completely loose.

her usual filter is blurred, maybe even wiped out, and jimin's having the time of her life at tzuyu's house party. she doesn't recall how many shots she's taken so far, but it's definitely more than she can count on both hands. for her, that's more than plenty, but still, she doesn't care. 

sure she's fallen a couple of times, but who needs balance when you're this turnt? 

for a second, jimin turns to look for hayi, because she swears the older girl was just behind her, but the crowd's too thick and hayi's borderline claustrophobic. knowing her, she probably went out for air, and yerin's probably somewhere upstairs, getting high. 

with those scenarios in mind, jimin turns back and continues to dance, because eh, her friends can take care of themselves. she bobs her head, shaking her hair to the thumping music like there's no tomorrow. she doesn't remember when she's felt this carefree, and it feels so. ing. amazing. maybe she should drink more often. 

too busy in her state of somewhere close to euphoria, she doesn't even notice that the music changes. it takes a turn from edm to rnb, and her dancing adjusts to the slow beats, as if she's aware, but she's anything but. her moves are sensual, enticing, and she unknowingly catches a pair of eyes from afar. 

usually, park jimin would be caught dead dancing in public and especially in such a ual way, but here she is doing so. and she's very much alive, drunk, but alive. she feels a pair of hands snake around her waist from behind but doesn't give it much thought. in fact, she thinks she likes the feeling and keeps dancing with the mystery guy. at least... she thinks it's a guy. the body pressed against her from behind feels like one, but whatever. 

she really doesn't care. 

she just wants to dance. 

and maybe take one more shot. 

she hears a familiar chuckle, a cringe-worthy nickname (baby), and the familiarity tickles her brain, but she's too intoxicated to match the voice with a face. his hands get a little too touchy for just dancing, but jimin simply tosses her head from side to side and aligns her body with his. she feels a pair of lips brush against her neck, and that's when she's pulled away. but she's instantly pulled back. 

confused, jimin looks up through her bangs and frowns, because heyyyy, what the hell, she was having fun. the sudden movement shakes her vision, but she recognizes the all too familiar face shortly after. she furrows her brow. 

"seungyoun?" 

on her right, seungyoun grips onto her wrist, his face void of emotion, but she swears she can spot the tiniest bit of anger. but alcohol alters her better judgment, so she could be wrong. then again, she's pretty sure he's angry.

the mystery man, although no longer a mystery, is on her left, his hand clutched on her arm. kim taehyungbears a look somewhere between frustration and annoyance.

"we were in the middle of something," he scoffs.

seungyoun simply glares at the latter, the aura he emitted threatening.

if looks could kill... 

taehyung quickly clears his throat and lets jimin go. "whatever," he mumbles, concluding that it's not worth the trouble, and disappears within the crowd. 

jimin groans, because that was kim taehyung? what the actual . that was kim taehyung, probably the finest piece of specimen to walk this earth, and he chose to dance with her, not the other way around. he approached her. 

and now he's gone. 

"what'd you do that for?" she slurs, trying to pull away from seungyoun, but his grip is exceptionally tight. 

he looks at her, his expression unreadable but his eyes.... his eyes showed the answer. jimin's just not sober enough to read them properly and figure it out herself. 

"i'm taking you home." 

it's all he says, and jimin protests as he drags her out the door unyieldingly. 

the cab ride is painfully silent. she's intoxicated alright but even jimin's self aware enough to know that seungyoun's angry. yup, definitely angry. why? she's not sure, but for some reason, it makes her sad. her best friend's mad, and she doesn't know why. so she pouts. and uncharacteristically so. concern for her friends back at the party never cross her mind. all that does is seungyoun.

seungyoun looks out the window, and jimin just closes her eyes. the steady drive of the cab is somewhat soothing. maybe she danced too hard. 

laying in bed actually sounds nice.

she stumbles out of the cab, tipsy and tired, once they reach her apartment complex. seungyoun pays for the fare, and she doesn't wait for him and drunkenly walks towards what she thinks is the right direction (it's not). but jimin has some slight trouble. she stumbles and stumbles, nearly tripping on her own two feet. 

seungyoun jogs to catch up and crouches down in front of her. 

"get on," he sighs. 

jimin furrows her brows and squints her eyes to make sure she's seeing clearly.

 a piggyback ride? 

from seungyoun? 

sober jimin would've said no. 

sober jimin would've pushed seungyoun and made him fall while laughing a little too hard about it. but jimin's not sober, at least not completely, not right now, and so she gleefully gets on with a wide smile and wraps her arms around his neck. 

the boy easily gets up and walks in the right direction, albeit taking his time. 

"why'd you drink so much?" he mutters under his breath, but jimin hears him anyway. 

she grins. "because my heart hurts, bestie. hehe, i don't knowwww. it feels nice though." she clings on a little tighter and rests her head on his shoulder. he could almost feel her smile grow against his shirt. "this feels nice," she mumbles. 

seungyoun says nothing. 

when they enter her apartment, he lets her down and jimin stumbles her way towards her bedroom. he follows her and watches her simply fall into bed with a loud, unladylike groan. he has to hold back a chuckle, because that's the jimin he knows and loves.

it's when he notices how her dress lifted up from the fall, revealing far too much skin, did his smile falter. and seungyoun looks away. unspeakable thoughts flood his mind, and he almost smacks himself, because he's attracted. in a way he shouldn't be. 

must be the alcohol. 

he dares himself to look back at jimin just to see if it is the intoxication or something else altogether. he's almost afraid of the answer, but deny it he will. hesitantly, he looks. from the bed, jimin shifts with a groan. her thighs move ever so slightly, and seungyoun sees milky, white skin he's never even imagined on his best friend. 

until now. 

a hard lump begins to take form in his throat, and at the sight of black lace, seungyoun tears his eyes away. his face feels flushed, and this feeling confirms it. 

definitely the alcohol.

so, he crosses his arms and clears his throat. "take off your shoes, idiot." 

jimin grunts as a response. 

seungyoun stares at her for a second. it's the alcohol, has to be. definitely. he's drank a good amount. which explains why he was so agitated earlier. seungyoun's immediately reminded of taehyung, of how the bastard was too close and too handsy with jimin, of how she didn't stop him, and of how jimin seemed to enjoy it. scowling at the image, he walks away and comes back with a glass of water in hand.

he enters the room to see her heels flung off and her denim jacket on the floor. 

of course. even when drunk she's a messy person. 

seungyoun moves the items off the ground and glances back up at jimin. 

she looks angelic sleeping in her white dress, he thinks. 

he almost doesn't want to disturb her.

"drink this," he roughly says. he's still mad.

jimin sluggishly forces herself to sit up, a stupid grin on her face. "hehe." 

she reaches for the cup but misses. 

and he sighs. "here, i'll do it." seungyoun gently pushes her hands down and presses the edge of the cup against her lips. "open."

she continues to grin, her eyes closed, and drinks a nice amount. 

once the glass is half empty, jimin stops and seungyoun finishes the rest. 

"thank you!" she opens her eyes and peers at him. his expression is the same from before, same from the party, same from the cab; it hasn't changed one bit. he's still angry, and she pouts curiously. 

"what's wrong?" 

seungyoun shakes his head. "nothing." 

"liar," she mumbles with a frown. "what happened? did i... do something.. wrong?" 

"no." 

"liarrr! you're mad. why? what'd i do?" 

seungyoun stares at her hard before giving in and sighing. "nothing. you just drank too much, that's what." 

jimin frowns, confused. "you're the one who told me to." 

"well i was wrong," he snaps. 

jimin flinches and lowers her head. "sorry."

look what you did now, idiot. 

seungyoun sighs for the third time, maybe even fourth, and lifts her chin up so that she faces him. "it's fine, jimin-ah. don't apologize." he ruffles her head, and the gesture makes jimin feel warm. the wide, stupid grin returns on her face, and he chuckles. "never knew you were such a light weight," he teases. "should've known." 

jimin sticks out her tongue as she lays back down. "whateverrrrr." she lands with a soft thud and presses her hand on her chest, "i just have fun earlier than other people."

"okay, go to sleep," he mutters, suddenly feeling tipsy. "i'm gonna head out."  

but jimin instantly shoots up and whines. "noooooo, staayyyyy." 

"go to sleep, jimin." 

"nuuh!" 

"jimin." 

"only if you stayyy." 

"i can't." 

"yes you cannn." 

"jinyoung would literally kill me if i slept over. you know that." 

"hehe, i'll lock the doOooOoorrrrr."

"..... no. sleeep." 

"please?"

"..." 

"seungyounieee, please."

"..."  

the sight is overbearing. seungyoun doesn't know what to make of it. his level of intoxication isn't making things better either.

everything's intensified. 

there jimin is, his best friend since middle school, on her knees, legs spread apart, hands together, pulling what might just be the world's cutest puppy face. her pouty lips, the lips that shout insults at him left and right on a regular basis, look so oddly kissable right now. 

her long straight black hair, signature style bangs, and big bright eyes.. 

all things seungyoun's used to.. appears different tonight. he's so flippin' attracted.

how can he say no... to her? 

to his best friend? 

sober seungyoun would've. 

would he? 

but he's borderline drunk right now. 

"i don't wanna be alone tonight... just.. stay with me, seungyoun. please." 

the word 'fine' comes out his mouth without meaning to, maybe he actually does, who knows, and jimin squeals in sudden delight. "let'ssss take a shot!!!!" she shoots up from the bed and heads for the kitchen but seungyoun stops her. 

"no, no more alcoholll." 

but jimin cutely holds up two fingers. "j-just one more!" 

she pouts again, and seungyoun loosens his grip. 

damn those lips.  

squealing, she dashes out.

seungyoun's not sure what happened or how things got to this point, but the next thing he knows they finish an entire bottle of soju, the lights are off, and he's sprawled next to jimin on her queen bed. even in the dark, he can tell that his face is heavily flushed as jimin's bears a rosy pink. and he vaguely thinks that maybe he shouldn't have drank a majority of the bottle for her sake. yeah, he didn't want her getting drunker than she already was.. but him getting drunk wasn't particularly a good idea either.

a drunk seungyoun? so many things could go wrong.

jimin turns her head to look at him and calls him a cherry tomato. her words slur way more than before, and she's sent into a fit of hysterics as she laughs at his burning face. 

seungyoun laughs too, turning his body in towards her. he doesn't care that she just insulted him. he was used to it, and the alcohol in his system made it all the more delightful for some odd reason. her melodious laugh is like music to his ears, even when drunk. she turns in to face him just the same and glances happily. their eyes interlock, and jimin just smiles. 

all he could think of is how beautiful he thinks she looks up close.

"what?" jimin asks expectantly, eyes turning into happy little moon crescents. "why are you looking at me like that?"  

"i'm not looking at you like anything," he fibs, but even drunk jimin can tell. 

"liar." 

seungyoun smiles, caught. "you just look pretty," he murmurs. "that's all."  

jimin giggles, delighted. "i do?" 

seungyoun nods while smiling, because yes, she does. she really, really does.

"you're pretty too," she begins but stops herself. "wait, no, good looking. you're good looking too." 

"better than... kim taehyung?" 

jimin laughs. 

"..." 

childishly, seungyoun turns away.

"heeeyy," she pokes his sides and he squirms from the touch. "you didn't even let me reply!" 

jimin smacks him playfully so he'll turn around. he does, and she reaches out to pinch his cheek.

"i laugheedd because i thought it was funnyy. you're waaaayyy better than kim taehyung. i'd chose you over him anyday, idiot." 

seungyoun frowns. "liar." 

but jimin shakes her head. "i'm not. i swearrr. cross my hearrttt." she reaches for his hand and places it on her chest. the stupid, addicting grin reappears on her lips and seungyoun's dumbstruck. 

"you're my bfflalalalal, of course i'd pick you! i'd pick you over that bastard im jaebum too!"

seungyoun falls silent at the mention of her ex-boyfriend. "you don't mean that.."

"you don't know, maybe i do! you've never hurt me like him, cho seungyoun.... my best friend for life and life and life and life and lifeeeeeeeeeuuuuhhhh!" she presses her forehead against his, there's a small resounding smack, and giggles. her laughter dies down, and she's staring at him, eyes now somber. "you're the only guy in my life that i can count on, you know that? you're my best friend, and i wouldn't want anything to change that, seungyoun. ever." she kisses his nose and whispers. "i love you so much." 

"i love you too, jimin."

the words come out before he realizes it, and she purses her lips. "you're looking at me like that again."

seungyoun's lips quirk into a playful smile. "can't i?" 

jimin just smiles, breathes, and closes her eyes.

he reaches out to curl a strand of hair behind her ear, and without a warning, seungyoun gently cups her face and closes the gap between them, pressing his lips against hers. the kiss is warm and soft, and he quietly pulls away without really wanting. 

jimin blinks, processing what happened, before her lips spread into a wide, drunk grin. 

"do that again," she murmurs.

and he does. 

seungyoun chuckles, his current state hazing his mind and conscience. he immediately crashes his lips onto hers again, the sweet taste of jimin far too intoxicating, perhaps even more so than the alcohol coursing through his body. he crawls on top of her and pulls the covers over their heads, trailing lustful kisses along her neck, and together, they get lost in the night. 

together, they get lost in the alcohol and lost in each other. 

 

---

 

"it was a mistake. we were both drunk," jimin tells him the next day.

but seungyoun can hear her waver.

 

 

a week passes, and he swears he's going crazy. jimin's driving him crazy.

"we agreed it was a mistake, so why are you doing this?"

"i'm not doing anything!"

"you're pushing me away!"

 

 

"did you and seungyoun fight or something?"

jimin shrugs.

 

"are you and jimin okay?"

seungyoun sighs.

 

 

"jaebum asked for me back."

seungyoun appears not be affected, but he is. everyone knows. he doesn't lift his head. "and?" 

jimin sighs. the silence answers him, and he leaves. 

 

 

jimin glares at seungyoun, heart torn, as he puts back on his shirt.

"you can't just come here and kiss me, seungyoun, and think-"

"you didn't push me away."

"well i should have! this was a-"

"a mistake?" seungyoun laughs. "yeah, well, you and i seem to be making a lot of them lately."

 

 

"you're avoiding me."

"i have good reason to."

"this is because of him, isn't?"

"what do you want me to say, seungyoun? that it isn't? that it is? jaebum's my boyfriend."

seungyoun's stare is unreadable. "i just want my best friend back."

he leaves before he can hear her, and her heart breaks.

"so do i." 

 

 

she's miserably drunk and teribbly in love.

with who? she's not so sure anymore. jimin drinks to forget, but hayi doesn't fail to keep reminding her.

"you have to tell him."

"jaebum's never going to forgive me."

"and what about seungyoun? you're being selfish, jimin. you're going to lose your best friend if you keep doing this."

jimin smiles bitterly. "i think i already have."

 

 

"what are we?"

he's here again, and she's tired of this constant back and forth.

"well, what do you want us to be?"

"can't we go back to the way things were before?"

before that night.

he ruffles her hair and forces a smile. "whatever you want, jimin-ah."  

he leaves, as quick as he came, but even jimin knows they can't.

too many lines have been crossed.  

 

 

if only she had known that that night would be the night seungyoun walked out of her life.. the night she lost her best friend.

maybe jimin would have done things differently. maybe she would have held on and have him stay.

but she didn't. she didn't know.

maybe seungyoun and her were never meant to be more than just best friends to begin with, hell, maybe they were, maybe their timing was just off. jimin really doesn't know, and as she stares aimlessly at the wall that hung endless of photos of them, showing off their many years of friendship, jimin regrets not telling him the truth.

 

seungyoun stood outside her apartment complex, drenched from the rain. it was three in the morning, a time where impulsive behavior got to even the best of us. it surely did with him. and her too. jimin came out to meet him despite jaebum's many warnings.

she stared at seungyoun, arms hesitantly crossed. she hadn't seen him for a week, and god, she missed him so much.

"what are you doing here?"

"i just need to know something. answer me honestly, and i'll leave." he shivered but continued. "did you ever see me as more than just a best friend?"

yes, she thinks. i do. i still do.

"i'm sorry seungyoun."

seungyoun sadly smiled. "so am i."  

 

 

 

"you think we'll always be best friends?" 

sixteen year old seungyoun shrugs. "i don't know. lots can happen, jimin. people change."

fifteen year old jimin frowns. "i know, but still... i'd like to think our friendship won't. at least i hope not."

seungyoun flicks her forehead. "then it won't, idiot. that's something we determine."

"promise?"

"promise."

 

 

*cries*