1.

Jooheon is his first and very best friend. Well, in Monsta X, at least. The two of them shared many things- their group roles, being the two youngest members, the same room. Jooheon was the first to reach out to him during their No Mercy days, the first to open his heart out, and the first to comfort his tears.

Truthfully, Changkyun wouldn't have it any other way.

So when the days are ending and he craves for presence, Changkyun slinks up right next to the other, entering Jooheon's bed in discreet and hoping he won't notice. The bed dips a little and Jooheon may stir- half the time he's alseep or working on a new song- or Jooheon couldn't be bothered to turn around.

(Why would he? He knows it's Changkyun, anyway.)

Changkyun would stay in his bed for long periods of time, sometimes never getting up. Most of the time, he just keeps quiet and listens to Jooheon breathe, whatever he's doing. Sometimes he inches nearer to the elder and snuggles into his chest, or his back, or his shoulder. Sometimes he watches Jooheon work over his shoulder, prods him to ask a question or two, learning more just by observing.

And then there are days when the maknae feels like talking.

Changkyun doesn't talk much. Everyone in the group knows that. But when he's talkative, when his energy is enough to beat Minhyuk's, then more often than not it means he's in a good mood. He's feeling happy enough to share his thoughts, noticing the most mundane things, to express himself with more than a smile or giggle. Most of the time, whatever comes out of Changkyun's mouth makes the hyungs laugh- it's cute, what the maknae notices and points out.

It's one of those days today.

"Hyung," Changkyun says, breaking the silence. It's a little past three am, but none of them felt like sleeping.

Jooheon hums. Turns around to face the younger. "Yeah?"

Changkyun's eyes are wide open in wonder. He's gazing at the night sky, face softly illuminated by the moonlight. "Did you know that the Moon moves across the sky each night?"

Jooheon raises an eyebrow. "Really?"

A nod. "I kept track of it this week." There's a faint, proud smile on Changkyun's lips.

Jooheon sighs. "Is that why you were tired every day?"

Changkyun blushes. Instead of replying, he shifts closer to Jooheon and snuggles into the crook between his shoulders.

"Don't tell Hyunwoo hyung."

Jooheon chuckles. He kisses the maknae's forehead.

2.

Most of them aren't touchy people. In fact, the only touchy member out of the group is Minhyuk. He drapes himself over everyone that he's rather a human blanket with bubbling energy.

So it surprises Changkyun, how touchy Hyungwon was today.

They're in the studio for Sukira, talking merrily with Leeteuk-sunbaenim. Changkyun has barely said anything for the past half hour, but he doesn't mind it because he doesn't know what to say. He just laughs along with everyone else and enjoys himself listening to his hyungs talk.

And then something is on his shoulders. He jumps a little.

It's Hyungwon's arm, embracing him in a one-arm hug.

Changkyun raises an eyebrow, but doesn't say anything. Maybe the elder feels like being a little friendly to him.

"...I.M-ssi?"

Changkyun blinks. Looks at Leeteuk. "Um, yes?"

"If you could be another member in Monsta X, who would you be?"

The maknae purses his lips. Pretends to think about it. Then opens his mouth. "Me, because I am the cutest."

His other members giggle at his answer. Out of the corner of his sight, he sees Kihyun rolling his eyes. Changkyun shrugs it off. His hyungs find everything he says funny.

Hyungwon's arm tugs him closer, bringing him to the latter's chest. Changkyun, pressed against his hyung's body, peers up at him.

Hyungwon is smiling fondly at him.

("I swear you two looked like a couple," Kihyun remarks when they're back in the dorm. Changkyun raises his head from ing his pants.

"Who?" He asks.

"You and Hyungwon." Kihyun tosses his shirt over the edge of his bed and reaches out for a folded shirt. "The way he was smiling at you made me sick."

Changkyun scoffs. "You jealous, hyung?"

He catches Kihyun rolling his eyes for the second time.)

3.

"Mmm."

A soft voice hums next to his, turning around in the sheets. Hyunwoo, in his deep sleep, barely registers the body besides him.

"Hyung."

Thin arms come to wrap around his. A head leans on his buff shoulder, soft hair poking into the space between him and the pillow. Hyunwoo sniffs and catches a whiff of familiar shampoo.

Changkyun.

Still half asleep, he pulls the smaller body next to his flush together. With his hand, he pushes Changkyun's head towards his chest, engulfing him with his thick arms. The younger man is limp in his embrace, letting out slight wisps of air.

"Mmm...hyung," the maknae mumbles. He buries his nose inside Hyunwoo's chest.

"Hyung, you always smell good," is what Changkyun says before both of them slip into dream world once again.

(When Kihyun arrives to wake up the group, he sees Changkyun's sleeping form clinging onto Hyunwoo for dear life. A chuckle escapes out of him, because Hyunwoo is huggable like that.

With faint touches, Kihyun leans down and brushes the bangs out of their maknae's face. He caresses his face gently, then leans down and pecks his forehead.

Changkyun awakens to lips on his skin.)

4.

Minhyuk, the third eldest of the group, disliked Changkyun at first.

The latter had plunged into No Mercy, all of a sudden, when they were three-quarters into the show. The latter entered the show so nonchalantly, replacing the former members who left just hours before his presence. The latter entered the competiton as if he was promised to win. The latter worked hard enough that he won the last two rounds, and he debuted.

During those days, Minhyuk was bitter and unforgiving.

He pushed away the maknae at first. He was intent on keeping his words. Persistent in showing that the younger one was not welcome around him within a five meter radius.

But then No Mercy ended, and he was stuck with the younger. The final members were decided and there was nothing he could do about it.

That night, after the last and final shooting of No Mercy, Minhyuk sits on the edge of his bed, still in a daze. Gunhee and Seokwon had left the dorm two hours ago, and there was a strange atmosphere hanging around the rooms. On the one hand, they won the competition. Survived.

But on the other, they'd lost precious friends as well.

Something burns at the bottom of his heart. Anger, regret, guilt. The feeling of wanting to debut with his eliminated friends having crushed. All their trainee years passing by his eyes in a flash, as if their hard work was in vain. The negative emotions built up inside him, causing his heart to ache, to shake. And he blames it on Changkyun, the intruder who somehow survived the competition.

He sighs, rubbing his head. He knows he shouldn't feel like this, shouldn't push all his anger towards the new trainee. After all, Changkyun did work hard to earn his spot. It just... still felt unfair.

He forgets that Changkyun has feelings too.

Minhyuk opens his eyes to absolute darkness. The curtains in the room are drawn together, blocking out the moonlight from outside. Across his bunk bed, he hears the smallest snores, tiny breaths being taken by his new bandmates.

The vocalist sits up, throat sore. He forgot to drink water last night, too deep in his thoughts. Ah well.

Slipping off the bed, he sneaks out of the bedroom and closes the door. On quiet feet, he stumbles his way to the kitchen and flicks on the light.

He trudges on to the cupboards, reaching out for a cup. Filling it with water, the young male pulls out a chair and sips on his cup.

Sniff. Sniff.

Minhyuk stops. Eyes widen. Did he just hear something?

Sniff.

He sets the cup down on the table. That was definitely a sound he heard.

Downing the rest of the water, Minhyuk leaves the kitchen with the light still on. Cautious, he crosses the living room to enter his bedroom, when-

Sniff.

He jumps. Turns around. Where did it come from?

In the darkness, he notices movement from the living room. Blankets shift, the bed creaks. A moment of silence, then he hears it again.

Sniff.

It's Changkyun.

Intrigued, Minhyuk steps towards the bed, careful not to make any noise. The sniffing from the maknae continues, unaware that somebody else was awake.

Minhyuk stops by the edge of the bed. The youngest member has covered himself with his thin blanket, only showing the top of his head. The elder one pauses, unsure of what to do. He bends over a little. Then whispers, "Changkyun?"

The sniffing stops. Abrupt.

"Changkyun, are you okay?" He whispers again. There's no sound that he takes as a reply.

Minhyuk bites his lips. What does he do?

Reaching out, he grabs the top of the blanket and tugs it off, revealing the distraught face of the younger. Changkyun, surprised, shuts his eyes and tucks his head into his chest.

Minhyuk squats down, nearing eye-level with the maknae. "Changkyun. Are you okay?"

Said member doesn't move, doesn't say anything.

Minhyuk sighs. "Look, I heard you. I heard you crying. I just wanna ask you, are you okay?"

Silence. And then Changkyun chokes out a sob.

"I'm... I'm okay, hyung," is what he says, voice cracking. He curles into himself more, hiding his face in his palms.

Guilt stabs Minhyuk's heart. Changkyun is crying for whatever reason, alone in the middle of the night, with no one to talk to. Minhyuk doesn't want to ask why- there are a million reasons Changkyun could be crying, and he's pretty sure he makes up half of them.

So, with heavy remorse and empathy, Minhyuk sits on the bed, opens his arms and covers the smaller body.

Changkyun stiffens. "Hyung...wh-what are you doing?"

Minhyuk cuddles the rapper, holding him as if he would break soon. "Sorry. I'm so, so sorry."

Changkyun blinks. His eyes tear up as he says, "It's okay hyung."

Minhyuk shakes his head. Lightly caresses Changkyun's face. "It's not, and I'm sorry. Don't cry anymore, okay?"

The latter nods, tears streaming down his cheeks. "I won't, hyung."

Minhyuk doesn't leave his side that night.

5.

Hoseok giggles, watching Changkyun draw stick figures in the dirt. Both of them were squatting down on the ground, right above Minhyuk and Hyungwon's set. They're done with their (short!) scenes and are waiting for everyone else to wrap up, switching spots every five minutes.

From above, Hoseok and Changkyun peer at Minhyuk, feeding a flower to Hyungwon. Slowly, he opens the latter's mouth and pushes the flower in.

Hoseok snickers. Besides him, Changkyun hums to himself.

"I love you baby," he sings in a low voice.

Hoseok glances at him. Cute, he thinks, smiling to himself. To the rapper, he says, "Make it more sticky."

Changkyun obeys. "I lo~ve yo~u ba~by," he sings again, voice dropping from high to low. Hoseok laughs.

Throwing an arm around the younger's shoulders, he ruffles Changkyun's hair affectionately. The latter only closes his eyes, appreciating the act.

6.

Kihyun is not a touchy person.

He does not particularly enjoy skinship, whether it be between family or friends. (Although he does miss his mother's loving touches very much.)

He doesn't like to touch his friends, nor hold hands, nor ruffle someone's hair, nor pinch someone's cheeks. He is just not a touchy-feely person.

Add on top of that his detached attitude, Kihyun finds it hard to show affection towards people he treasures. He never talks sweetly to anyone, doesn't like to sugarcoat or express anything intimate. Usually, he turns to actions for that, like cooking for them or singing them lullabies when they can't sleep.

Which, coincidentally, is what he always does for the youngest member of the group.

On most days, Changkyun isn't a touchy person either. He keeps his thoughts to himself, laughs at his own weird jokes and stays silent.

But then, when he's elated over something, Changkyun becomes really touchy.

Today they'd wrapped up their music video shooting. It was a long, tiring day- everyone shot their own scenes and posed for the pictures. Changkyun, despite not getting his own scene in the video, is bouncing around in happiness because he shot together with one of his favourite hyungs- Kihyun.

In fact, he's currently leaning on said hyung, arms curled around the other's. Changkyun laughs, joyful, as Hyungwon and Minhyuk continue to fool around on the set.

When Kihyun stands up to get a cup of water, Changkyun follows him around- just like a puppy. The younger trails after him, holding onto his shoulders, giggling at everything in sight. Then Kihyun watches Jooheon and Hyunwoo run down the road, cameras rolling ahead of them. Changkyun ends up next to him, arms pressed together.

Secretly, the younger links his hands with him and interlaces their fingers.

Kihyun grimaces. It isn't because he doesn't like Changkyun.

(It's actually     the opposite.)

The skinship is making him uncomfortable. It's...different, coming from their maknae. And he does feel a little warm inside. Embarassment, perhaps?

At the same time, he wouldn't let go of the younger. Moments like these are rarely offered by Changkyun, the shy and awkward maknae, so Kihyun up whatever discomfort he's feeling and lets the younger attach onto him more.

But really, maybe he's enjoying the skinship a little too much.

7.

"Ogu ogu, don't cry baby~" Minhyuk says, cupping his face. Changkyun blushes, pushing his hyung's hands away.

"Gross, hyung," he grumbles. The tips of his ears are red. "I'm not a baby."

"You really looked like one, though," Kihyun states. He looks at Changkyun from his seat, eyes still red from crying. "The fans were saying that too."

"Like you didn't cry, hyung." Changkyun scrunches his face.

Minhyuk laughs. So do the rest of the group. The excitement wears off with each breath they take, and one by one, each member began to relax.

Their first concert had been a huge success, tickets selling out five minutes after they were on sale. Thousands of fans poured into their concert hall, filling up the seats with sparkly lights and neon signs. The sounds of their fanchants are still embedded in their minds, the image of their fans watching them eagerly imprinted in their heads. It just serves to remind them how far they've gone as a group, how much their hard work paid off and how much is left to be seen, why they even started out this journey in the first place and how good it felt to having achieved their dreams.

Changkyun sighs to himself, reminiscing about the day's events. It was overwhelming, to say the least- he felt too many emotions, too many things he'd struggled to express. The exhiliration of seeing so many people in the audience- and among them, his parents and friends. He spotted a few of his former group members in the audience, made it a point to acknowledge each and every one of them on the stage. The proud faces he receives every time never fails to make him smile.

And the fans, oh, the fans. How they were so supportive of him. How they cried out his name every few seconds, how they hold up their signs so high in the air. How they laughed along with them, chanted along with their songs, and threw out so much love from the audience.

This was it. This was the feeling he came for, struggled to achieve after all these years. The dream he completed thanks to them. It was no wonder he broke down, at the end of their concert.

There is too much gratitude and love he couldn't express.

"Hey, you alright?" Hyunwoo's face appears in front of him, eyes peering into his.

Changkyun nods.  Frowns a little. "I am, I am. Why?"

"It's just..." Big hands engulf his face. "You're crying again."

"No I'm not." His frown deepens.

Then he feels something wet trailing down his cheeks. Hyunwoo exhales. Gently, his fingers wipe away the tears from his cheek.

"Changkyun-ah, you don't have to hide your feelings, you know." All of a sudden, thick arms wrap around his thin frame. Hyunwoo props his chin atop Changkyun's head. "You can always come tell us about anything."

"I think he's just being an idiot, hyung," Hyungwon says, coming out from nowhere. He joins the hug despite his words. "This kid doesn't even know he was crying."

Hyunwoo chuckles into Changkyun's hair. The maknae blushes, squirms in the warmth of his hyungs' arms.

Then Minhyuk enters the room, dazed. "Whoa whoa whoa, what's going on?" He eyes the three, swaying side by side with their maknae in the middle. He shrugs. "I'm gonna join you guys."

The blonde slips himself between Hyungwon and Hyunwoo, letting out a fit of giggles.

Hoseok, Kihyun and Jooheon flit into the room next. They pause at the sight of their members huddled together in the middle of the room.

"Is there a group hug going on? Why wasn't I invited," Jooheon scoffs, skipping over. He buries himself next to Hyunwoo.

Kihyun and Hoseok stand still, unsure of what to do. When the top of Changkyun's head appears, the maknae's eyes widen and he mouths out something.

Help.

Both of them laugh. They walk up to their members and join the hug, forming one big ball of cuddle.

 

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a/n well that was long. not really, but it looks like it. hope you all enjoyed!! leave comments if you like, and constructive criticism always welcome :)