His last year of high school, Jonghyun drops out of school to support his family. He's pretty much failing every class but music and art so why not he figures.

 

The day of his leave he catches Eunsook, the girl of his affection ever since freshman year, in the hallway because he knows this is her only free and she always spends it by her locker eating lunch while watching Crash Course.
 

They've never really talked before expect for that one time as freshmen when they sat next to each other in algebra before she moved up to honors math. 

 

So when he passes her in the science hallway on his last day, he hands her a letter and he simply kneels down beside her hands her the letter and says “Goodbye Noona”. 

 

On his walk back he hits his head for being so lame, but who cares he had to give it a shot. He was in love with her after all.

 

After getting his phone taken away from him for dropping out he realized that he's pretty much lost all chances of Eunsook contacting him. Even for the slim chance that she would text him he'll never know and it aggravates him for two full weeks before he gives up banging his head on his desk. How stupid could he have been to write a love letter to a girl he barely knew? 

 

It's 34 days later when she actually contacts him.

 

Why he is so lucky Jonghyun will never know but on a particularly sunny Thursday in January after his shift at the music store he hears the doorbell ringing. 

 

It's Eunsook dressed in a cute purple blouse and a ripped pair of jeans. It's the first time he's seen her outside of a school uniform and damn does it make his heart race. 

 

All she does is hold out a deck of index cards, and ask, "Wanna help me study for midterms?". 

 

Of course he smiles like an idiot and vigorously almost to the point of hurting his neck nods his head up and down. 

 

After he shakily leads her up to his room which thankfully his mom had just cleaned (he's knows it's lame his mom cleans his room) Eunsook gingerly sits down on the ground next to his bed and he follows.

 

They don't talk too much or at all about why exactly she's here or why it took so long, but when she says "let's start with AP Bio" all Jonghyun can manage to do is find the cards labeled bio and starts reading aloud a card about the Citric Acid Cycle to her. Of course he obviously has no idea what any of this is so after about an hour of respiration and photosynthesis he boldly asks her what all of this actually means. 

 

The words appear to light up her gleaming face as she takes out a very obviously bruised and used notebook with all of the crinkled postings sticking out from the edges of the paper. 

 

She motions him to come sit next to her as she shows him a diagram of something called a thylakoid, and although he really wants to listen to her amazing voice, he's completely tuned out by their mere closeness and the strong smell of coconut that he'd barely caught whiffs of before in the class. 

 

When she finally stops to look at him, all he can do is give her the best puppy eyes he can manage and apologize and explain that he barely passed regular bio with a D+ and that he doubts his ability to handle this level curriculum.

 

She simply shrugs her shoulder and says, "Yeah I kinda figured, but I thought I’d at least give it a try” while dropping her head to look at the floor.
 

"So Eunsook...." he says after a not so brief silence.

 

Her head doesn't rise from the ground. 

 

"Why exactly did you show up today? Not that I'm disappointed because I've kinda been wanting this for the past four years but I guess you know that since you probably read the letter which I know was really embarrassing but it was slightly better than confessing in person so um right yeah I was just wondering.... you don't have to answer if you don't want to."

 

She bites her bottom lip in such a bashful way that automatically catches Jonghyun’s stare. She takes a small breathe before saying, "You seemed endearing and I just thought why not. I don't allow myself to have a lot of fun so...I thought I'd try it for once."

 

"Well I promise I'll do my best to suffice as you entire life's funess" 

 

"That's not a word." She jokingly glares. 

 

"See why I dropped out?"

 

"I know that's not why."

 

"What makes you think so?" 

 

"Word on the street is that you did it to support your family"

 

“I guess rumors can be accurate sometimes. I underestimated the grapevine too much" 

 

"I know there's more to the story, care to share?" Eunsook asks.

 

"Well my dad left about.... four months ago? And I guess this time it was for good. I knew my mom couldn't support all of us on her own, and I know that my sister deserves to go to a good college and to eat good food and actually enjoy her childhood without having to worry about finances, so I decided to dropout and get a couple jobs. My mom works too hard as it is, so I hope to get promoted and earn a stable wage. So far no raises, but I guess well see, it's only been a month." 

"That's pretty remarkable"

 

"It was just the right thing to do. It's not like I was gonna go to college anyways"

 

"You really hated school that much?"

 

"I liked art and music. That's about it"

 

"What kind of art? Do you draw?"

 

"Yeah I do actually...it's one of my few hobbies"

 

"Will you draw something for me?" 

 

"Of course." he says without having to even think about it.

 

A pregnant silence envelops the small room.

 

"So you're in love with me?" She asks so warily while fiddling with her thumbs apprehensively.

 

The sudden conversation change makes Jonghyun's heart pound. 

 

"Yeah, I mean I don't really know what love is but it just feels right I guess..." 

 

"May I ask why?"

 

"You're beautiful." he took a deep breath, "And intelligent and kind and generous and caring and determined...and just really admirable, I love you because I look up to you. I just know you're a really good person"

 

Eunsook simply nods her head with a slight trace of a smile on her lips.

 

"I think you're pretty admirable too" 

 

"Really?" he sounds so eager, so desperate to have her approval.

 

"Yeah" she whispers not meeting his eyes. 

 

After a few minutes of Jonghyun processing everything that just happened, Eunsook asks for the time and he tells her it’s half past five.

"I should probably get going, I have an ACT Prep class in half an hour" again he's astonished at her hard work. 

 

"O-okay...well this was fun? For me I guess...."

 

"I had fun too, Jonghyun. You're really easy to talk to, and my best friend just moved away so I've been feeling a bit lonely"

 

"Really, where'd Taeyeon move to?" He mentally curses himself for revealing that he knows her best friend’s name. He probably sounds like a stalker now.

 

"Connecticut. Her dad got a job there."

 

"Well I'd be happy to sub in as best friend if you'd want that"

 

"We'll see about that, but I really have to get going it’s a pretty long walk" She grins.

 

"Want me to drive you?"

 

"Are you sure?"

 

"Yeah I don't have to work for the rest of the day"

 

"Okay then thanks"

 

They don't talk much in the car ride, because well Jonghyun thinks Eunsook finally realizes they literally know nothing about each other besides the impending fact that he is head over heels in love with her. 

 

"So have people talked about me now that I'm gone or have I been written off as the guy weighing the graduation rate down?"

 

"A little bit of both. The snobby kids have said some pretty rude stuff, but everyone else seems to think you're a good guy with some unlucky circumstances." Eunsook states matter-of-factly. 

 

"Really they think I'm a good guy? Well that's a reputation I'm willing to accept. I'd figure there'd be more judging. A lot more."

 

"I mean I may be sugar coating it a little. Reputation doesn't matter though, I mean both you and I know that you did the right thing so don't fret it."

 

Jonghyun is once again awestruck by her wisdom. She really is as amazing as he'd dreamed. 

 

"You think I did the right thing...?"

 

"Yeah you put your family before yourself and I think that's remarkable like I said. Not a lot of people are willing to give up their lives like that"

 

"Well I'd like to think that my life isn't totally over..."

 

"Oh no... Sorry that came out wrong" She says furrowing her eyebrows in concern.

 

"Don't worry I know it's gone too, but it's okay" he grins sheepishly trying to cover up all of his worries that are buried deep into his existential core.

 

"Maybe with this new friendship of ours you'll be able to live a little" She suggests.

 

"I hope so" Jonghyun's hopes are officially raised and up into the heavens. He and Eunsook are actually friends and it fills his stomach with butterflies.

 

                               ----

 

From then on Eunsook starts coming to his house every Friday after school. She's a pretty busy student running what seems to be every academic club Jonghyun can even think of, on top being on the honors roll. 

 

Jonghyun knows there's more to her than all the college app basics, and he's just craving to find out. He yearns to know her pet peeves, her loves. What her relationship with her family is like, her thoughts on life and all its problems. He simply wants to know her, completely and deeply. 

 

 

On her second visit, he learns a bit more. Her favorite class is Sociology and....okay fine that's all he gets out of it. But he's determined to learn more. 

 

On their fourth meeting he asks her if she wants any juice. Juice is friendly right? After she nods, he takes out a large container of cranberry juice and pours her some in a sippy cup, because she's wearing a really clean pair of white jeans and he doesn't want to be responsible for their death. 

 

"Oh, my ex boyfriend loved that stuff. He used to drink it more than water" She chuckles wrapping her lips around the tip of the cup and sips.

 

The combined sight of that and of the words that just expelled out of make Jonghyun’s arm hairs shoot up from his skin, much like his would have if he looked at her lips for any longer. 

 

Locking his eyes to the tiled walls he walks over to the cabinet, just for something to do as he says as casually as possible "Oh I didn't know you have an ex. Anyone I know?"

 

"Nah we were long-distance. He lives in Toledo. Met at a summer camp at Michigan State, so no one from school really knows about him. Which is fine. I hate having my private life publicized."

 

His heart skipped half a beat knowing that she was sharing something private with him. That he wasn't muddled in with the crowd of everyone else. It made him feel special, if just for a second or two.

 

"May I ask why you broke up?" His voice betrays him cracking at the end. Jonghyun curses himself. 

 

"He was about to enter college and felt I'd drag down his experience. He put it a bit nicer than that, but all I heard was that he wanted to bang other girls and go to the crazy parties and get drunk, which isn't something I particularly approve of." 

 

The phrase ‘bang other girls’ burrows itself into Jonghyun’s brain. Its implications don't necessarily shock Jonghyun, but they weren't great to hear.

 

He thinks of how to respond. Of course the usual "Well he missed out" is an option but it's much too cliché and Jonghyun isn't that cheesy. 

 

"That was kinda dumb of him." Is what he settles with.

 

"You think?" She asks, not particularly surprised, just slightly curious at Jonghyun’s thoughts. 

 

"Yeah I don’t know I mean the way I see it, life is about love and the experiences that come from it, and not...getting plastered till you pass out." God he wishes he were just a bit more eloquent. He knows he shouldn't care, but he really wants Eunsook to respect him as an intelligent individual...who just happened to drop out of high school his senior year. 

 

"Yeah I think I agree. I don't know either. I can sort of see what he meant like he didn't want to be weighed down by someone hours away. I was never convinced our relationship would last, too. So that pretty much explains why we didn't work out I suppose"

 

"You don't seem to be too bitter about it. That's good."

 

"It was a year ago, I'm over it. Over him. He was kind of a jack ." She snickers.

 

Oh Eunsook never swore. A part of Jonghyun told him that she felt like this was a safe space, safe enough to swear, safe enough to discuss her break up. It made Jonghyun feel safe, too. 

 

 

A few minutes later, they make their way up to Jonghyun’s room and sit on his bed. Jonghyun glances over at his clock, it's 3:23 and he has to be at work by 4. Normally his shift wouldn't start until 6, but one of his colleagues just had to take the day off and he had to happily fill in.

 

"It's 3:24 if you can't tell" She snickers jokingly, making Jonghyun realize that he's just been staring at his clock for longer than socially acceptable. 

 

"Sorry, it's just I've gotta go to work soon. And I really don't feel like it." 

 

"Where do you work?"

 

"I'm the cashier at that bookstore near school" 

 

"Oh the one with the big purple sign?"

 

"That's the one." He nods.

 

"I love that place, I've never seen you there before though."

 

"Well I just got the job a few weeks ago. I actually like it a lot. I get a discount by the way if you want anything." 

 

"How much of a discount?"

 

"30%."

 

"Really? That's awesome. God I wish I could get a job there. Don't really have the time for a job at the moment." She huffs annoyed at how busy she is. 

 

"Friday's seem to be your only free time. Am I wrong?"

 

"Nope, you're right. I really hate it, but you gotta do what you gotta do"

 

"Yeah I understand" 

 

"Oh, yeah I guess you do"

 

Jonghyun simply nods and grins in her direction. They are very different people, but it’s evident that they’re both just doing what has to be done. In Eunsook’s case that means studying her off and taking all AP classes. In Jonghyun’s case it means dropping out and filling up all his time with work, work, and more work. 

 

 

"You can come with me if you want. It'd be kinda nice, no one’s usually there this time of the week."

 

"I guess bookstores aren't too popular a destination on Friday afternoons" 

 

"You'd be correct." 

 

"So when do you have to be there?" 

 

"4."

 

"We should get going then." 

 

"Yeah once sec I gotta change" 

 

Jonghyun gets up to walk over to his very very tiny closet and pulls out his one and only button down. Yeah he should probably get another one, but damn those things were expensive and he needs to save every penny he can if he wants a good life for his sister Sodam. Which he does. Very much so. 

 

"Turn around" he chuckles embarrassingly as he slowly pulls his shirt over his shoulders.

 

Respectfully, Eunsook does a 180 and puts her head between her knees showing that she would be taking no peeks. Part of him blushes from her adorability, another part of him is disappointed she isn't even a little curious. 

 

 

He carefully buttons them as to not mess up, but of course he skips a hole and the whole damn thing gets disoriented. 

 

"Ah !" he hisses hastily starting to undo them all. 

 

"What happened?" Eunsook asks raising her head from its lowered position. 

 

"Buttons got messed up," he laughs to himself "this really shows how good I am at adulthood". 

 

"I'll fix it. I can do it really quickly." 

 

And before Jonghyun can say a word, Eunsook is strutting up to him and has her hands on the sides of his shirt. 

 

Jonghyun's eyes merely bulge out of their sockets and she starts ing his top button. 

 

"You can breathe, I don't bite"

 

Jonghyun lets out a breath he doesn't know he was holding. 

 

"Holy crap, is that a tattoo?"

 

Oh no... Jonghyun forgot about the tattoo. This wouldn't look good. 

 

Eunsook runs her warm fingers across the bold lettering making his flesh sensitive and alert. 

 

Without asking, not like she has to, she slips a sleeve off of his shoulder revealing the complete string of words. 

 

"Different Doesn't Mean Wrong" She whispers, her breath dusting across his chest. 

 

Her hand lingers there for a bit longer before moving back up to tug his shirt back on. 

 

She resumes buttoning, not meeting Jonghyun's eyes. 

 

Should he say something? He feels like he should definitely say something. He wants to know what the hell she's thinking. Did she scoff and it and toss it away as some meaningless quote? Did she actually like it and maybe thinks the hot tattoo thing is y? Because Jonghyun would be lying if he said he didn't think he looked just a tad bit ier with the black writing under his right pec. 

 

 

She gets all the way the last button before speaking again. 

 

"Can you explain it to me?" It's barely a whisper but he hears it, and for some reason it warms his heart. He figures it's probably because she doesn't seem to want to run away. Hell she's within a five-inch radius of him, and yeah it feels nice. She might actually be enjoying his presence half as much as he does for her. 

 

"It's just a little thing I said to myself throughout junior high and high school. You know especially at our school there's huge peer pressure and competition to be the best. You had to have the best balance of academics and sports and extra curriculares.... and it wasn't really for me. I felt different, and well wrong. But my mom always told me that I was doing my best and living a good life. After a couple of heartwarming speeches the message started to stick and...yep. Once I turned 18 I decided I would get it as a little act of self-interest. I guess I felt I deserved it even though I really didn't." 

 

 

"Different doesn't mean wrong. I like that. Wanna write it on me in sharpie?" She smiles brightly at him. He can't quite tell if she’s kidding or not, but when she turns around to rummage through her backpack for a pen he figures she really means it. They'd have matching tattoos. It’s quite a cute thought. 

 

"Where?" He asks, running the back of his neck with his hand as a nervous habit he picked up from his dad. He always despises the fact that he’s anything like the man. 

 

"It's gotta be somewhere no one can see..." 

 

Jonghyun's mind wandered to some pretty interesting areas. He subconsciously scanned his eyes down her curvy body slightly shivering at the thought of just touching it.

 

"This is hard it's spring...everyone sees almost everything" Good lord does she realize the effect her simple words were having on him? He can't stop undressing her in his mind and wow he really needs to stop that before exterior evidence arose. 

 

"Oh how about my arm? I just won't wear short sleeves for a while" 

 

She quickly s the light green hoodie she’s wearing, before handing the pen over to a quivering Jonghyun. 

 

Seeing Eunsook in a tight black tank top that truly showed off her tiny waist and her delicate clavicle and God her s. Okay look away look away he told himself. 

 

He thankfully stops his hand from shaking before placing a steady hand on her elbow and lifting up her arm before bringing the permanent pen down onto her pale silky, and damn does he mean silky, skin. He attempts to do a cool gothic style like the one he adorns, but it doesn't work out too well for him. Nonetheless as he traces the last letter he steps back looking satisfied with his work. 

 

"What do you think?" He asks, just as his eyes glaze over the clock and notice that it is now 3:57 and they have to leave right now. 

 

"Oh " he yells before grabbing Eunsook’s hand very unnecessarily 

 

"What is it?" She asks for the second time that day. 

 

"I have to be at work in three minutes" he rushes to explain grabbing his keys and opening up the garage door.

 

He screws being chivalrous and all that crap because he doubts Eunsook even likes it and doesn't open he car door for her. Once she's in and buckled up, which he double checks because safety, he's pulling outta the driveway and pressing on the gas (in a safe manner of course). 

 

"Sorry about that, but uhh do you like it?" He smiles attempting to be charming. 

 

He peeks at her checking out her arm in the rear view mirror and he thinks he catches a grin. 

 

"Yeah it's pretty nice. Of course not as badass as yours but...almost" she snickers. 

 

"I don't know if cheesy meaningful quotes count as badass"

 

"Nah they do. At least yours does."

 

 

 

When they get to the bookstore it's 4:03 and Jonghyun really hopes his manager doesn't notice. 

 

Thankfully, and he's really praising Jesus here, his manager doesn't mention it because the clock at the store is a bit slow. It says he's just on time.

 

 

After handing over the keys the manager swiftly exits saying he has a dinner to get to and that Jonghyun will have to close up at 10. 

 

Great. Six hours here. At least he wouldn't be alone for all of it. 

 

 

"How many customers do you usually get around this time?" 

 

"Well I don't normally work this shift, but I'd assume I'll get a few more than the 7-10 one." 

 

 

"Wait so how many jobs do you have altogether?"

 

"Oh you wanna see my big schedule?" he jokes while taking out his phone.

 

"Weekdays 7-10 I work the information desk at the hotel on Main Street. 10:30-2:30 I work at TJ Maxx. That one’s particularly boring. It’s just a crap load of stay at home moms looking for very specific types of pillowcases. Then 3-5:30 I’m at the music shop, and then Monday, Wednesday, and Friday evenings I'm here 6-9. Tuesday's and Thursday's I'm a bus boy at that fancy Italian restaurant Luciano's from 5-8." 

 

"So you're a pretty busy guy." 

 

"Oh I have weekend jobs too! Those ones are bookstore 9-12 and then I'm barista at that hipster café from 1-6. That one is hilarious because those kids say the weirdest stuff which the straightest faces I’ve ever see. Also their clothes. God their clothes." 

 

"Don't you usually take like multiple shifts from the same job? I thought that's what people did" 

 

"Yeah most people do, but I'll probably just stick with this and then when maybe I get a raise or promotion or maybe just more hours offered to me, then I'll quit one" 

 

"So like I said. You're pretty busy." 

 

"I took all the jobs I could get. I'm currently trying to get a night job at CVS Monday's through Friday's." 

 

"A night job? Isn't that really gonna mess up you're sleeping schedule?" 

 

"I'm an insomniac anyway. Might as well earn for the family if I'm gonna suffer" 

 

"Do you really have insomnia?"

 

As she says that an elderly woman walks in, making the door chime and Jonghyun automatically say "Good afternoon ma'am" while waving and smiling in her direction. 

 

"Can I help you with anything today?"

 

"No, sweetie I'll be just fine on my own" She’s an adorable old lady, how cute. They always liked to stop by this place and pick out the weirdest romance novels. It always makes Jonghyun giggle internally. 

 

He smiles widely when he sees her walk over to the romance section. 

 

 

"Sorry about that, but yeah I am one. Have been since freshman year." 

 

"How do you even function? I can't imagine...it just sounds so hard." Eunsook looks up at him sympathetically.

 

"It's.... it’s pretty hard. If you have any sleep remedies please let me know." He ends with a bright smile hoping to subside her worry. Wow she is actually worried about him. 

 

The smile doesn't seem to work, as Eunsook still has her eyes filled with worry. 

 

"You don't drink energy drinks, right? You know those are terrible for you. Especially if you’re an insomniac"

 

"Yeah, no..NO of course not I mean...didn't a kid die from drinking those too much?"

 

"Yeah he did. So don't start drinking them!" 

 

"Hey hey I'm not." he says putting his arms up in innocence. 

 

After a few minutes of silence, she announces she's going to find Jonghyun a good book. 

 

Jonghyun wants to say that he doesn't really have time to read a book or that he's never been a big reader, but then again he knows she could pick for him the most boring nonfiction book in history and he'd still read it front to back multiple times. 

 

Eventually she picks for him a (and he doesn't wanna say it but obviously very girly book he means it has two teenagers girls eating ice cream on the damn cover) book called Since You've Been Gone and all that comes to him his the Kelly Clarkson song that he starts humming not even ten minutes later. 

 

Jonghyun buys it with his discount but it's still $12. Damn when did books get this expensive. Eunsook hands him $12 dollars but he can't accept right? Can he? He is the one keeping the book after all so it makes sense that he's the one to pay for it. 

 

"Aish take my money you baby"

 

Jonghyun thinks that if you take that "you" out of that sentence, she's just called him baby. He really needs to stop being a creeper.

 

 

"Nah it's alright" 

 

Eunsook takes a step closer so that their faces are within inches of each other. He can feel her soft pants of breath hit his chest and her plush s press themselves lightly into his chest. He feels his heartbeat pick up as his eyes find their way to her cleavage so close yet too far from him. She looks up at him with lightly glazed and even slightly hooded eyes as she purses her pillow–like lips apart. 

 

 

Jonghyun eyes latch onto her's and as he does he feels something graze over his before Eunsook quickly rushes away to the customer side of the counter. 

 

When Jonghyun looks behind him, he finds a couple dollar bills shoved into his pocket. 

 

Before he can even mutter a word or even process a thought about what just happened Eunsook is waving her hand around as she heads towards the door telling about something like "See you next week". Damn did he really have to wait a whole other week before seeing that face again? He doesn't know if he can take it. 

----

 

Jonghyun's restless. Absolutely restless. It's three o’ clock in the morning and his eyes can't even seem to cooperate enough to stay shut for more than two minutes straight. His head is reeling with thoughts of work, his future, and Eunsook. 

 

He decides to use all the energy for something beneficial and gets in his car to heads to the 24-hour gym he has a membership to. It's always where he goes when he can't sleep, and tonight was no exception. 

 

He was on his tenth rep of the bench press and his arms were already starting to feel the effects. 

 

He takes a much needed water break. After an hour of working out, he's already worked up quite a sweat as he sees checking himself out in the mirror. He's the only one at the gym since it's so late, and Jonghyun enjoys the freedom and solitude although he could use a spotter sometimes. 

 

As he's gulping down a bucket of water, his phone goes off. Immediately he rushes to answer, his mind already filling with thoughts of emergency and crisis at home. 

 

"Hello, what's wrong? Sodam is that you?" He blurts out worriedly. 

 

"Huh? No Jonghyun, it's me Eunsook. Are you okay?" 

 

"Me? Yeah I'm fine. What about you? Isn't this a pretty late time to be up for a normal sleeper?"

 

"I've been studying for this APUSH test for like the past four hours and my eyes literally just cannot read anymore. I could barely even read the 'Jonghyun' in my contact list." 

 

"So you just looking for a break?" 

 

"Yeah you're my fun. I'm looking for some fun"

 

"Well I'm happy to be of service. Do you have anything you wanna talk about? Just something to get out of your system?" 

 

"Hmm I could use a good vent. You don't mind listening?" 

 

"Of course not. Now vent away." He smiles; glad to be talking to her. 

 

"I just feel like I'm wasting my life away sometimes, you know? I don't give a crap about any of the classes I'm taking and literally am just doing it for college apps with I know they say is bad, but when you're not a rich who doesn't have all the money in the world you need scholarships. College is expensive and if I wanna go I'm gonna need a lot of them. But I don't even know anymore my gpa is getting worse and worse and I just...don't want all my hard work to be useless I guess. I mean I don't have a clue as to what I'm doing with my life anymore all I know is I spend my days pleading for Friday and that's not a pleasant way of living." She sounds utterly exasperated and Jonghyun wishes he were there to comfort her.

 

Jonghyun hopes she pleads for Fridays partially for him, and not only the weekend. Jonghyun also hopes that venting all of that out detoxes Eunsook of some of her 'ucky feelings' as he likes to call them. 

 

There's a brief pause. 

 

"Feel better?" He asks quietly, not wanting to break whatever tone seems to be underlying their phone call. 

 

"Yes, thanks for listening. You're kinda my only friend at the moment." 

 

"Yeah same with you. Unless you want to count that custodian I work with at the hotel...but he only speaks Portuguese. We've still managed to have some pleasant small talk though. It includes him walking past me while I wave at him." 

 

When Jonghyun hears a giggle on the other end he swears his heart turns into a timpani thrumming against his chest. 

 

"So...does that make us best friends?" 

 

"Well of course, that was implied" he jokes rolling his eyes and himself and his foolishness.  "You should get some sleep now, it's late. Goodnight Eunsook." 

 

"Goodnight Jonghyun" she whispers breathily before hanging up.  

 

----

 

 

It's three nights later that Jonghyun's phone displays "Caller: Eunsook" again. It's once again late at night, and Jonghyun is beginning to worry about the girl's sleep habits. 

 

"Hi, Eunsook how are you?" Jonghyun says cheerily happy that she has contacted him again. 

 

"Jonghyun...can you come over? I'm...I'm just I could really use a friend right now." Jonghyun hears her voice quivering, making his eyebrows furrow in worry that she's crying. 

 

"To your home?" 

 

"Yeah, I unlocked the door. Just be quiet my parents are sleeping." 

 

"I'm on my way." 

 

Jonghyun had only been to Eunsook's house twice before. Both times just to drop her off after they hung out. It isn't a particularly large house, but it is enough for her and her parents. Jonghyun knows better than to judge because well his house is even smaller and he can understand how hard it is to make a living nowadays. 

 

When he arrives at the white little house he quietly twists the doorknob and prays that the door doesn't creek. Thankfully it doesn’t and Jonghyun starts to make his way upstairs where he hopes to find Eunsook's room. He once again prays that he doesn't open the wrong door and finds her parents, because they probably have no idea who he his and if they do it isn't a good idea. Also it’s late at night and it is considered very rude for strange teenage boys to interrupt two adults sleeping. 

 

Luckily Eunsook leaves her door open, and Jonghyun can make out her sweatshirt clad back sitting on her bed as he tiptoes down the hallway. 

 

Sliding past the gap between the door and the wall Jonghyun finds an unsurprisingly crying Eunsook resting on her bed, her shoulders shaking with sobs. 

 

Jonghyun crouches down in front of her not exactly sure of what to do. 

 

He lightly rubs his hands on her fuzzy socked feet to give her a silent sign that he's there. 

 

She quickly lifts her head from between her knees and Jonghyun can see her blotchy red tear stricken face and it breaks his heart knowing she's so sad, but God is she beautiful. Her eyes are wet and teary and it just makes her brown orbs twinkle in the dim lighting of her nightlight. 

 

"Hey Eunsook, what's wrong?" He doesn't stop rubbing his hands along her feet, because although he knows he shouldn't be too touchy with her, he just needs to comfort her in some way. 

 

She cracks a small smile and rolls her eyes "God I'm so dramatic aren't I? I'm sorry I called you Jonghyun, you should just go home." 

 

"I'm not going anywhere okay? Now talk to me, please." He carefully sits next to her on the bed staring into her eyes because he just can't look away. 

 

"My midterms didn't go too well...at all." 

 

"It's okay, you've got third quarter now you can start fresh." 

 

"But my gpa Jong. God it's gonna be ruined now."

 

"Colleges look at more than just gpa." 

 

"But I need a scholarship. And I don't have time to volunteer. That means I need a good gpa or no ing college for Eunsook" her voice cracks at the end and she bursts into another storm of tears leaking their way down her pretty face. 

 

"Aigo Sookie you'll be alright, you're a great student. You should try not to get so caught up in your grades." 

 

"Well it's hard. They pave my future." She grunts not too enthusiastically.  

 

"Yourfuture is based on a plethora of things, not just senior year midterms" Jonghyun starts rubbing her shoulder lightly and it seems to help her calm down as her breathing normalizes a bit more. 

 

"Yeah I know." 

 

"That's good, you should always remember that." 

 

"I know" She is nodding her head as she burrows it into Jonghyun's toned shoulder. 

 

A few minutes of silence pass by as Jonghyun continues to comfort a crying Eunsook.

 

"Jonghyun, do you think I'm like-able?"

 

"Well of course Eunsook. You know that don’t you?”

 

"I know" he feels Eunsook nod against his shoulder as she climbs into his lap in what seems and subconscious manner. 

 

A few more minutes pass as Jonghyun tries to get his mind off the feeling of Eunsook now wrapped in his arms and just how natural it feels. 

 

"It's just...you're my only friend. And I've never considered myself an antisocial person, and I think I'm quite friendly too. So I really should logically have a few good friends. But I really only have a couple that I talk to in passing about homework or a club. Never anything personal."

 

"You talk with me about personal stuff." They’re just about whispering now due to their closeness.

 

"Yeah because you're my friend. I want more...no it's not even that. I don't want more, I just feel like I should have more. What's wrong with me? Am I annoying or something?" 

 

"No no Sookie, those other people are just stupid. I'm sure they're just jealous of you. Maybe they think you're too good for them" 

 

"Why do you say that?" She's stopped crying now and Jonghyun smiles in accomplishment. 

 

"Because that's how I felt about you" 

 

"I hope you don't anymore"

 

He doesn't respond. 

 

"Jonghyun, please tell me you don't anymore" 

 

"Well I do" 

 

"You shouldn't. It's not true." 

 

"Okay… " He trails off.

 

"You don't seem convinced...Look, I think you're amazing, okay? I know you are, you've done an incredible thing for your family that I don't even know if I could ever do. And you're really wise despite maybe not having done that well in school. A-and I really like you, and when I read that letter telling me you loved me I cried because I was so happy. It took me so long to find you because after that I started to convince myself that it was a joke.  That it was too good to be true. But your words were too genuine and loving, I knew it had to be real. I still read it every night before going to sleep. It just...makes me feel so good." 

 

Eunsook turns her heads away from Jonghyun's shoulder to face him and looks him straight on. Jonghyun can see the raw emotion pouring out of her and it takes all he has not to kiss the life out of her right then and there.

 

His grip around her waist does tighten though, and when Eunsook's head starts to lean in close to his, the grip of his hand gets increasingly harder and harder to the point where he is pushing her towards him, and not letting her leave him.

 

When her hands comes to rest at the back of his neck, he knows what is about to happen, and none of the daydreams or fantasies he's had could have prepared him for this moment. 

 

His eyes lower to focus on the plush of her lips and he subconsciously his lower lip in anticipation. 

 

He watches as Eunsook's eyelids flutter closed before following in suit. 

 

Gradually, he starts to lean in until he can feel her breath against his and he can smell her sweet coconut scent.

 

Slowly the distance between them ceases as her pillowy lips brush against his own. Her lips are so soft and just a bit wet from earlier as Jonghyun presses with a bit more pressure against her lips, and then again and then again until he's craving her more and more, running his fingers through her hair and pulling her in even closer than she already is. 

 

When he feels a faint brush of her tongue against his lips, he immediately obliges opening his mouth and he feels her tongue quickly connect with his own. 

 

She tastes absolutely perfect and Jonghyun swears he loses it when he hears Eunsook softly moan into his mouth. As she does her tongue not too gracefully runs itself over his teeth, making her abruptly pull back and start giggling cover her face with her hands. 

 

"Sorry I've always been a bad kisser..." 

 

"Hmm? But I was liking it..." A little too much he doesn't add. 

 

"I just don't get how people do that whole tongue thing." She continues giggling bashfully. 

 

Wanting her to feel less uncomfortable, and honestly just because he's always wanted to do this, Jonghyun pulls Eunsook's hair away from her shoulder and leans his face down to gently kiss the delicate length of her neck. 

 

This merely causes her to giggle more, until he starts and on a particular spot on her collarbone which makes her gasp aloud. 

 

Slowly, and regretfully, Jonghyun retracts his face from her neck, running his finger over the slightly darkened spot he's made. 

 

Then he brings his hands up to cup her round cheeks and smiles up at her. 

 

"Now it's pretty late and you have school tomorrow, so you need to get some sleep. Let's talk more about us and maybe that whole tongue thing tomorrow, okay?" He says rubbing his thumbs along her cheeks. 

 

"Jonghyun?" 

 

"Yeah?" 

 

"Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?" She whispers while lying down on her comfy bed.

 

"Of course" he whispers back, before crawling next to her and gingerly wrapping his arms around her frame. To his delight, she scoots even closer to him and nuzzles her head into his beating chest. 

 

"Goodnight Jong" 

 

"Goodnight Eunsook" he gives her head a soft kiss as he watches her eyes close for the night. 

 

----

 

The next evening Eunsook visits Jonghyun at the bookstore fifteen minutes before closing.

 

“Oh hi Eunsook” He says shyly as he notices the girl enter the tiny store.

 

“Hey” she says just as shyly.

 

Jonghyun wonders where to go next. So much had happened the night before and he has no idea what her reaction was. She could’ve been completely disgusted at the fact that they’d kissed or overjoyed. Now he can only hope she came to tell him about what she’s feeling and clear these thoughts away from his mind.

 

“So last night…” she says, her eyes glued to the floor as she slides her feet forward to the main desk, “I was feeling really depressed and I asked you to come over knowing how vulnerable I was and…  I don’t know. I’ve never really been sure about how I feel about you. I mean of course I think you’re a wonderful person, I’ve just never been certain if I see you in a romantic way or in a merely friendly way.” She inhales a deep breath and finally looks up at him with those pure brown eyes, “But after yesterday, I guess it’s pretty clear but um, I really like you and I’d like to be with you.”

 

Jonghyun’s heart leaps a thousand times and he’s so happy he feels like he could just burst out singing.

 

“However, I’m a really busy person, and I know relationships take a lot of time and I’m just not sure I have it. And I don’t want to go into a relationship knowing I’m gonna let you down, because you deserve better than that and- ” Jonghyun runs around the counter and envelops Eunsook in his strong arms.

 

“Sookie, you know that’s not gonna stop me from being with you right? The only thing that’ll stop me is if you don’t want to date me.”

 

“Well I do wanna date you…”

 

“Then we’re dating, yes?”

 

“Okay.” She glances up from his chest grinning bashfully before going on her tiptoes and giving Jonghyun the sweetest gentlest peck he’s ever experienced.

 

He looks up at the clock and sees that he should’ve closed up five minutes ago.

 

“So, since we’re dating now why don’t I take you on an actual date?”
 

“Don’t you have to watch your sister tonight while your mom’s at work?” he asks poking his arm teasingly.

 

“Oh you’re right. Well how about I make us dinner at my house? I think I might’ve heard a stomach growl from you”

 

“Don’t make fun! I haven’t eaten anything since noon”

 

“Why’s that?”

 

“I just haven’t had time to eat anything since”

 

“Noona, you really can’t skip meals”

 

“Aigo ten minutes into our relationship and you’re already scolding me”

 

 “Okay okay I’ll stop. But promise me you’ll eat better tomorrow?”

 

She nods her head giving him a sincere smile, before they take each other’s hands and enter the night’s romantic and warm atmosphere.

 

 

----

 

Jonghyun whips them up some stir-fry quickly and the two of them eat it up in a jiffy due to how hungry they both were. They converse sweetly amongst themselves, giggling when one of them catches the other staring.

 

The couple makes their way quietly up to Jonghyun’s room where they put on some movie and sit as close together as possible.

 

Jonghyun can’t help but appreciate how lucky he is to have a girl as wonderful as Eunsook in his arms. To think that he thought he loved her before when he was just a measly kid in high school with no purpose in life other than a major crush on a girl he barely knew. Well, now he knew her; not completely but definitely deeply and he knew his love for her had grown to be something so much more real and tender than whatever he had previously.

 

He squeezed his arms just a bit tighter around her, dipping his head to her elegant neck and softly pecking at it.

 

The girl coyly giggles only encouraging Jonghyun to continue on. Gently taking her hips he brings her to sit in his lap, and when she looks up at him with blushing cheeks and those tiny crescent eyes Jonghyun can’t resist from cupping her face with his hands and bringing her lips to his own. She immediately sighs contently into his mouth and he can feel her smile against his lips.

 

He pulls back because as mesmerizing as her full lips are, his lips crave for more. He drags his lips across her jaw, down her neck, and across her collarbone. Jonghyun notices the low cut tank top her chest adorns, and hesitantly he presses tender kisses to her . Her breath becomes labored, and she quietly gasps his name. She gently takes his hand in her own and brings it to the hem of her shirt. Jonghyun understands her message and swiftly pulls off her thin top revealing her luscious s popping out of a white lacy bra. He groans at the site before slipping off his own t-shirt and throwing it to the floor. Pulling her in closer to himself, Jonghyun starts at her succulent cleavage before moving her bra away with his hand to latch his tongue onto her to drag his teeth gently across the sensitive area making Eunsook buck her hips up into Jonghyun’s . He moans quietly, but thinks to himself that they shouldn’t go much farther. Partly because he really wants to take it slow, and partly because he doesn’t have any condoms. But of course mostly the first part.

 

Still not wanting to stop, Jonghyun lays Eunsook down next to him and starts kissing down to her naval. The thought of what lay just a bit further down crosses his mind. He sensually looks up into her eyes, his mouth just above her jean zipper. He watches her take a deep breath before whispering, “We shouldn’t…it’s not that I don’t want to, but I don’t want your sister to hear us. Trust me I want to” biting her lips at the end just to drive him mad.

 

“I guess you’re right, sorry my lust started overpowering me a bit there” he says climbing back up the bed.

 

“I promise, I’m not blaming you at all” she smirks before running her fingers through his tussled brown hair.

 

“You know, that tattoo really is quite y.” She mutters tracing her thumb over the black letters.

 

“I knew you thought so” Jonghyun chuckles right before he turns her chin up to meet his face and takes her lips in a passionate kiss filled with wandering hands and tangled legs.

 

“Oh and Sookie?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“You are not a bad kisser by any means. In fact, I quite love your kisses.”

 

“Well that’s not what I’ve been told in the past…”

 

“Don’t worry about the past. I’m your boyfriend now and I think you’re amazing, okay?” he says booping her nose.

 

“Ohh you said the b-word”

 

“And now I’m about to use the g-word; You are my girlfriend. My lovely, giggly, beautiful girlfriend.”

 

The kiss she gives him in return proves that she thinks exactly the same of him. But if that isn’t enough she giggles, “And you’re my handsome, y, kind-hearted, selfless boyfriend”.