-13th August 2016-

 That place was dark and cold. When he walked, he could hear a footstep behind him, but when he turn, no one was there. When he said something, his voice echoed through the dark place. Where is he? Is he lost? How can he get out from that cold place? 

Suddenly, he heard a voice calling his name. 

"Jun." He knew that voice

"Jun." The voice belongs to someone he love. 

"Jun."  It so soft and soothing to his ears.

"Jun." It Minghao. He was so sure. It is him. 

"Minghaooo!!" Jun shouted. But all he can hear is his voice echoed through the dark place. He shouted again and again, but the same thing happens. 

"Minghao, please, please say something." Jun said, almost broke into tears. He swore that he could heard his lovers voice. The voice he missed so much. 

"I'm sorry Jun." That the last words Jun heard before reality hit him.

 

"Jun, you idiot crazy giant!!! Wake up before I kill you!!!!!" Woozi shouted. He's almost smashed Jun's phone because that damn alarm kept ringing non-stop. How can this idiot sleeping while his phone ringing like some women who about to give a birth to a baby. 

Jun groan as he heard the annoying voice who love to nag at him (most of the time) early in the morning. Jun rub his sleepy eyes. But stopped when he remembered his dreams. "I saw Minghao." Jun said, out of nowhere.

Woozi was speechless at the mention name. He knows how much Jun loves Minghao. He knows his bestfriend really adore Minghao and willing to do anything to Minghao. He knows that Jun is a strong man once, but since Minghao left him, his life became hopeless. And Jun only depends on Woozi and Seungchoel to help him survive. By feeding him, always asked him to take a shower and more. 

It looks like, Seungcheol is the father, Woozi is the mother and Jun is their OKU son. But both of them didn't mind, because Jun is their bestfriend. Even if it takes a hundred years for Jun to healed, they would be there for Jun and support him.

"I've fried some pancakes today. Come down and eat." Woozi said, walking to door for Jun's bedroom. He walked out from the room and shut the door close, but stop and pooked his head inside Jun's bedroom. "Seriously, come downstair and eat, or I'll ask Seungchoel to drag you downstair." Woozi said and smile at his last words. So, that is how they manage to get Jun to eat. 

Jun washed his face and headed downstair. He looks fine but deep inside his heart, it broken. He, himself is not sure if he has any heart left. After that accident happened, his heart has given up and broke into thousands of pieces, no, it broke into infinity. 

He wish he had the power to turn back time. He wish he could do something when he needed him. He was to selfish that day. He blame himself, but Woozi and Seungcheol said it not his fault nor Minghao's fault. None of them is wrong.

As he walked downstair, he could heard Seungchel and Woozi were talking to each other and laughing when one of them make jokes. He wish he could be like that, he wish he could laugh like that, he wish he could do everything like other couple would do. In the past 3 years, he kept on wishing but none of his wish were granted. Maybe God hated him for what reasons he don't know.

"Finally. You woke up sleepy head." Seungcheol speak as he saw Jun long-slim legs coming down. Jun manage to crack a weak smile while looking at Seungcheol direction. "I have some weird dream last night." Jun said. He walked to them and take a sit beside Woozi. 

Seungcheol and Woozi looked at each other for a few seconds and turn their attention to Jun. Wooz already told Seungcheol what happened earlier. Seungcheol was also speechless, he didn't know what to do when Jun wanted to talk about this later. 

He wanted to comfort Jun but at the same time, he don't know what kind of advice he should give. So, he prepared himself and get ready for anything Jun would tell him.

But Jun remained silent. 

"What kind of weird dream you have last night?" Seungcheol asked, when Woozi signalled him to do so.

"I thought I saw him. But I didn't. I heard his voice, but when I called him, he didn't respond. I-I don't know if it really him. I just want to see him for the last time." Jun said. Head hanging low, his eyes were fixed at the pancakes in front of him.

Seungcheol mouth formed an O-shape. After 3 years, it was the first time Jun had dream about Minghao. 

After 3 years.

"Maybe, he was trying to tell you something. But he was scared that you would get mad at him, so he didn't showed himself." Seungcheol said. As he said that, he could see Jun smile. Eventhough it not a big smile but Seungcheol was satisfied. At least Jun didn't take the matter about his dream seriously. If not, he will be crying right now. Jun would be a crying mess if he take his dream matter seriously. 

Woozi gave a look to Seungcheol, the looked on his face was saying, -Is that the best you could do??!- Seungcheol shrugged it off and turn his attention to Jun. 

"Jun." Woozi called out. 

"You know, it been 3 years already. You need to let him go. You know he wouldn't want his Jun to become like this. Hopeless." Woozi said. He cared for his best friend to much that he don't want to lose him as well. 

"I..." Jun stuck at his own words. He hated himself for looking so weak and everyone was pitied him. He thought about doing as what Woozi said last year. But that just don't happen. He can't just erase Minghao from his world, how could he do that? 

Jun sighed as he spoke, "I will." Bam. Once he said that, he swear he could heard his heart saying something like, -I will kill you brain!! How dare you make Jun said something like that!!- 

But that was not the problem here, the problem is, deep inside his heart was aching. It hurt so much. He thought that maybe if someone shook the core of his heart, the core for his memories with Minghao deep inside his heart, he don't think he will be sane anymore. 

And again he wished for Minghao to come home and hug him until he sleep and forget all this nightmare he'd been through for 3 years.

 

-13th September 2016-

Again. Jun found himself in the same dark room. 

"Hello!!" Jus shouted, but received zero respond.

"Hellooo!!" Jun shoted, a little bit louder this time. As he walked to nowhere, he stepped on something. He looked to his feet and confused. 

"What thee :-" Jun said as he tried to adjust the dark around him, he reached for the thing under his feet and grab for it.

A piece of paper. A crumpled paper. He wanted to know what was written on the piece of paper. 

Maybe everything, and maybe nothing. 

Lucky him, when he opened the crumpled paper and  saw a few words on it. The darkness is no kidding. He swore that his heart was about to burst out from his chest if he didn't control the fast beating of his heart.

He hope he had a torchlight with him. Candle is also fine. But he have none. 

"Jun??" He heard the same voice calling him, the soothing voice he used to love, the voice he used to listen everyday. But this time, it was different. Jun could sense the voice calling him but not in a statement but as a question. 

Why would Minghao called his name like that, he was not supposed to be here, right? That what he thought.

"Minghao. Let me talk to you. Please. I-I really l-love you." Jun said, stutter and less than a minuted, he broke into tears. He kneeled down and cover his face with his palms. His heart stared to ached as he said those words. 

He cried and cried even harder when his voice echoed through the dark place. The voice of his kept saying -I love you-.

"Minghao." He called for the said name and waited for him to replied, but he got nothing. He could only heard the sound of his ugly sobs. 

He calm himself down. He tried to breath in and breath out to cease the pain that struck his heart. He bit his lower lips to prevent himself from breaking down again. He needed to be strong, so that Minghao would want to talk to him. 

He force his lips to smile, even if the smile was weak, he doesn't care. He wanted to see Minghao. He wanted Minghao to see him as someone he used to be. Someone who are strong, passionate with everything, and never give up. 

Suddenly, a black fog appeared. Jun was shock, his heart was beating like crazy. He could hear his heart beats loudly. He put his hands on top of his chest, and sooth his heart to calm down. 

When the fog was fading away, he could see a figure. A slim figure standing in the middle of the fog with his hands trying to fix his hair. A small smile was seen on his face.

Jun stared in amused. Could it be?

 

"Wen Junhuii!! You ing idiot!! I swear I will beat the out of you if you don't ing open your eyes!!" Woozi shouted for the tenth time this morning. Woozi sighed as he watch the log, and giant log in front of him, didn't even budge when Woozi was screaming his lungs out. 

"For godness sake Woozi. What wrong?" Seungcheol said, worried was painted all over his face. Not that he's worried about Woozi, but Jun. He's afraid that Woozi would killed the poor boy if Jun would continue doing things like this. Always woke up late in the morning. 

"This ing log over here don't want to wake up." Woozi said, pointing to Jun who was sleeping peacefully with the screaming and shouting Woozi just gave. He looked at Jun with his deathglare but it was useless, because Jun didn't even open his eyes. 

"Maybe he's tired. Let him be." Seungcheol said while dragging his now pissed boyfriend from Jun, because maybe Jun won't be save if he's not around. And he can't let Woozi to commited a murder and have to report his boyfriend to the police. 

Woozi sighed and let Seungcheol drag him from the log. He just need to make sure that he's friend was still alive. Because 3 years ago, there was once Jun almost killed himself. He ate the whole sleeping pills and got himself situated in a hospital with the help of Seungcheol and Woozi. 

That night, Woozi kept thinking that maybe his friend need to be watch. Because who knows what might happen if the boy is left alone or being alone, again. That is how Jun was in Seungcheol and Woozi's house. Although the accident was 3 years ago, but seeing Jun lying in his bed, unmoved, his heart shivered. Not bearing to see his best friend in the hospital.

As Seungcheol drag Woozi from Jun's bedroom to the kitchen, he himself had thought about the same accident 3 years ago. Except that, he was worried about Woozi more than Jun. Because Woozi looked like a zombie 3 years ago. When he found out Jun ate the whole sleeping pills to his dismay. 

Woozi didn't want to eat unless Jun woke up, or he don't want to go home until Jun woke up. It pained Seungcheol heart really bad. Woozi is his boyfriend and his responsibilities. So, why would Woozi care about Jun more than him? It not that he's jealous or anything, it just he needed Woozi's attention to. He called himself selfish for saying something like that. He just need more attention like he used to have, but at he same time, he's not mad at Jun.

"Cheol~" Woozi called him, whining as Seungcheol finally let him go in front of the stove at their house kitchen. 

"What is it?" Seungcheol need to resist the nee