”Choi Sulli!! Wake up now!”

 

Somebody was knocking on my door and calling my name. That must be my brother.

 

I woke up and found myself at the desk where is full of sheet music. And on my lap it was my guitar. I don’t even know when I’ve fallen asleep.

 

I stretched myself then took a bath, and grabbed my guitar before going out.

 

I walked along the street and stopped at the footpath where I usually come. Then I took off my cap and placed it on the ground. I brought my guitar out of its bag, and started playing some songs in order to get some loose change from the passers-by.

 

There were many people here. Some stopped to listen, some clapped their hands, and some sang with the song I played. But no matter how much money they would put in the cap, it still cannot compare to those smiles they gave me. And I’m glad that my music can make them happy.

 

.

And it makes me think of someone… the girl… She’s the one I used to play guitar for every day.

 

It’s almost ten years that we lost our contact. She has to leave this place to study in America. Over there I guess she must’ve met a lot of new people. And I guess she’s already forgot me. But no matter what happened, I just hope she’s fine now.

 

Every time I think of her, I always can’t help smiling. Every minute we’ve shared is all beautiful. I was really happy. And every time I think of her, I’ll hold the pendant which is on my neck tight. It’s the thing she gave me before she went away. And it’s the only thing I have with me to remind of her.

 

.

Jung Soojung… Don’t you ever know that someone is still missing you every day and every night?

 

....

 

When dusk fell, people passing by became fewer, so I went back home.

 

After I got home, I went into my bedroom and went to my desk. Then I brought out my guitar of its bag again.

 

I played the song she liked… the song I used to play for her every day. Although time has passed for so long, although we were still young that time, and although the distance and the time has separated us from each other, I can still remember everything about her so clearly. Her face, her voice and her favorite things… Everything is always on my mind.

 

…

Next morning has come. The weather is really good today. The sunlight that shone through my window and the warm breeze that came in made me want to stay in bed longer. But finally I got up to take a bath then went to the same place to play guitar again. And probably because of the good weather today, a lot of people came here.

 

.

“Uhm… May I ask for one sweet song please?” One little boy walked straight to me and asked.

 

“Sure!” I answered and played a song like what he asked for. But suddenly he ran to somewhere.

 

He hurriedly came back with one little girl who is around the same age as him. They stood in front of me and listened to the song I was playing. And it seemed the little girl was really happy that she couldn’t stop smiling.

 

Finally the song ended. The girl turned to smile at him again, and the boy seemed so shy at her. Then she gave him a kiss on his cheek as a reward, so that they both looked even shyer at each other, before they walked hand in hand to another place.

 

“Thank you very much!” The little boy turned back and said.

 

I smiled back and give him the thumbs up before they finally left.

 

.

Young love is such a beautiful thing. It is pure and innocent. And it reminds me of my young love in the past. We used to go everywhere together, and I used to ask one young man to play a sweet song for her, and she also gave me a kiss on my cheek. Everything is so clear on my mind as if it has just happened yesterday. I can’t believe that time would passed so fast like this.

 

.

As people passing by, I continued playing guitar in order to make everyone happy, and in order to get some loose change. But suddenly I saw someone.

 

I saw one girl walking with her foreign friends on the other side of the street. And they were laughing happily.

 

.

Jung Soojung, is that you?

 

It’s the face that I remember so well. Although it’s almost ten years past and the picture of her on my mind is just a little girl, she’s still as cute as she used to be. …No… I should’ve said that she’s even more beautiful than ever.

 

Is that really her? So she’s already back? And what should I do now? I’m pretty sure that it’s her, but we’ve lost our contact for so long. So I don’t really know whether she remembers me or not. And even if she does remember me, I still don’t know what I am now to her. 

 

.

I just watched her passing me by with a lot of questions on my mind. She and her friends became farther and farther from where I was. I really want to follow, but something held me back.

 

I decided to left everything here and ran after her. Since today is the day I’ve been waiting for. It’s the day to meet her again. Then if I let her go without doing anything, I must be the most stupid person in the world.

 

I ran as fastest as I can, but the crowd is a big obstacle to me. I saw her one the corner of the street, so I was afraid that we would miss. Then I tried to run even faster.

 

.

Ouch!!...

 

I collided with a bicycle and fell onto the ground.

 

“Are you alright?” A middle-aged man, the owner worriedly asked since I had a cut on my arm.

 

But at that moment I didn’t care about anything else anymore. I didn’t even feel hurt. I quickly stood up and continued to run to that corner where she has just passed.

 

.

But when I reached there, I didn’t see her.

 

I continued running, hoping that she might still be somewhere. But I didn’t really see her; I guess I’ve missed her already.

 

Eventually I gave in. I walked back to the place I’ve left my guitar at. Then I went to the studio for rehearsal with my band. And then I went back home after that.

 

.

I came back into my bedroom then lied down on the bed and closed my eyes. I regret not making up my mind just a bit faster. If only I could remove all my hesitation, then I wouldn’t have missed her. How stupid I am that I’ve let her. I really don’t know if I’ll have another chance to see her again. 

 

..

The next day, I still went to the same place to play guitar. But today everything is different when I keep looking for her all the time, hoping that maybe she’ll come here again. I really want to see her, although throughout these years I’ve tried hard to get over her. But her face is still always in my head. She’s my first love and my only love. I don’t know whether she’s already met someone new or not. I just want to see her again. I want to see that she’s still fine. And this is the best thing that an ordinary person like me can ask for.

 

A lot of people came, but they just passed by. I kept looking for her but didn’t see. I guess she wouldn’t come here today.

 

.

“Good job kid! Here you go!” A middle-aged man said and threw some loose change for me but they scattered.

 

I stopped a while to take these coins back into the cap before I continued playing guitar again.

 

Hmm?

 

Somebody’s now standing right in front of me. I looked up and it is her.

 

I was really surprised while my hands just kept on playing guitar.

 

I saw her smiling and staring at me. What should I do now? The girl I’ve been waiting for is now right in front of me. Or maybe she remembers me? Does she remember me? My heart is now beating so fast.

 

“Hey Krystal! Whatcha doing? Hurry up!” One of her foreign friends said something in English, so she turned to her friends instead.

“Yah! I’m coming!” She answered then walked away from me.

 

But then she stopped and turned back before putting some money into my cap. Then she smiled and finally left.

.

So now … she’s forgot me already…

 

My heart which was beating so fast now is like it’s already stopped. It’s not strange that she forgets me since we’ve lost our contact for so long. And that time we were so young. How will a girl who has everything like her care about someone who has nothing like me? I shouldn’t have expected too much.

 

.

At night, I went up on the roof to lie down watching stars. And it reminds me of those days when we watched the stars in the sky together. She was really happy and that time it was cold, so I hugged her tight to give her warmth. But now there’s no her by my side, I have to look up the sky alone. And when it’s cold, I have only myself to hug.

 

.

Next morning I went to the same place to play guitar as usual, but my feeling is just different. I don’t know whether I’m happy or sad now.  At least I can still meet her again; at least I can still play my guitar for her, although it doesn’t mean anything to her like on those old days anymore.

 

.

She walked past here again, and it’s just like yesterday that she came with a smile on her face. She seems very happy with her friends. And I’m glad it is like that. I’m glad that at least I can see her smile… and it is exactly the same as that smile in those days. And I just can’t help smiling at her again.

 

… Then I just think that only seeing her every day like this and seeing that she’s still happy is probably the best thing I can get.

 

....

 

In the evening, there’s a party for those rich teenagers, and they hire our band to play music for them. Once again I just couldn’t help hoping she’ll come. I know it’s crazy to looking for her everywhere I go, but I do miss her.

 

I walked into the party with my own guitar. I don’t really know anyone in this place. Everybody all dress so well while I have only my T-shirt, my jeans and my old sneakers. I guess our societies are just too different.

 

I walked to the stage beside the swimming pool to meet Minho, Key and Onew. They are my seniors and it’s been five years we’ve formed our band together. After that we went on stage and played the music.

 

A lot of people came. Some were dancing. Some were eating. Some were talking. And some were taking photographs. It is really fun that we also dance even though we are now on the stage.

 

.

Suddenly I saw her walking into the party with her friends. I was surprised but still tried to control myself since I have to perform on the stage. She’s really gorgeous today. That little angel I used to know has now grown up. She’s so gorgeous that everyone stopped doing everything to look at her. And I’m just like them.

 

She’s now besieged since people tried to get to her. Now I feel even much farther from her than ever. They’re all good; they have everything, while I myself only have those old memories we used to share. I have only my two hands with my guitar to get only loose change. I won’t be surprised if she’ll choose one of them… someone who is not me.

 

I saw her walk around and greet everyone. She looked very happy. I guess these people are her old friends. And I guess she was glad to see them again. But I just want her to know that the one who’s standing here missed you so much, but that person could only just watching her since we’re now like strangers, and we are too different.

 

I missed those days when we were happy together. We went to the park; we went to the zoo. We were stuck in the rain, and you were really scared of the thunder, so I comforted you. I told you I love you, and you accepted my love. You said my arms were warm; you said you love my songs, and you said you want me to sing for you forever. Do you still remember these things?

 

.

I decided to sing the song she liked. I don’t know whether she still likes it or not, but I just want to sing it just once more for her… Jung Soojung, this song is for you…

 

The intro of the song started. It’s strange that those loud noises became quieter, and she also turned to look at me. Now I don’t really care about anyone else but her. My eyes are fixing on her… just only her.

 

 

.

 

What day is it? And in what month? This clock never seemed so alive.

I can't keep up and I can't back down. I've been losing so much time.

 

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do... nothing to lose.

And it's you and me and all of the people. And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you.

 

All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right.

I'm tripping on words. You've got my head spinning… I don't know where to go from here.

 

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do …nothing to prove.

And it's you and me and all of the people. And I don't know why …I can't keep my eyes off of you.

 

There's something about you now. I can't quite figure out.

Everything she does is beautiful. Everything she does is right.

 

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do… nothing to lose.

And it's you and me and all of the people… and I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you.

…and me and all of the people with nothing to do... nothing to prove.

And it's you and me and all of the people… and I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you.

 

What day is it? And in what month? ...This clock never seemed so alive.

.

.

 

 

The song has ended, and everybody applauded. I can see a smile on her face; she’s now smiling at me. I’m glad that at least my music can still make her happy.

.

…My little princess, I love you… And I’ll be forever loving you…

 

.

.

“HEY EVERYONE! LET’S HAVE FUN!!!” Somebody shouted as he jumped into the swimming pool.

 

Now the party is in chaos. Those teenagers are all jumping into the swimming pool. I don’t really get what they’re doing. I’m now so confused.

 

“Choi Sulli! Why the hell are you standing there?” My seniors asked then lifted me up and were about to throw me into the water.

“NOOO! YOU CAN’T DO THAT!”

 

They finally threw me, and I was sinking into the bottom.

 

I looked up and saw a lot of people on the surface of the water. It’s really dark here since the light can hardly shine through. Therefore, I tried to go up to see the light.

 

…Huh?...

 

While I was going up, a girl with long hair came to me and put her arms around my neck… And then she kissed me on my lips.

 

I was astonished, but for some reason I felt that the taste of her lips is so familiar to me. And I don’t really know why.

 

.

We are now kissing in the water. It’s the most passionate kiss that I’ve ever done. I don’t know who she is, and I don’t know why she kisses me. But she does make my heart beat so fast. I admit.

 

When we almost ran out of air, we slowly went up to the surface but our lips were still touching.

 

“Soojung?” I was really surprised when I opened my eyes and found that it’s her.

 

She slowly opened her eyes and smiled at me before kissing me once again. I also kissed her back and this time is even more passionate.

 

“Soojung, I mi… missed… y… you so mu…much.” I said with difficulty since our lips didn’t let go of each other’s.

 

“Hehehe…” She smiled and took a look at the pendant she gave me. Then she started to cry.

 

“Soojung…”

 

She hugged me tight and I hugged her tight as well. This is the time I’ve been waiting for so long… the time to have her in my arms again. And this time, I’ll make it better.

 

.

.

“Jung Soojung, I love you.”

 

.

.

THE END

.

 

 

 

.........

A/N: I need to advertise once again.. keke <3 Please visit us at JungLi forum. (welovejungli.com) if you love this f(x)'s maknae couple. And I'll post more JungLi one-shots soon. <3