If there was one word to describe the feeling in Minghao, it would have to be death.

Lately, he's been having many revelations. New ideas dawned to him and gave him an eye to see everything. Except, this revelation made him feel bad, if not worse.

Being quiet had its uses. He could easily inspect the group members without anyone noticing a difference. After being with the members for so long, he practically knew everyone like they were him. Except, he knew clearly there was quite the difference. They all had uses in the group. Woozi was in charge of producing the music. He noticed Woozi spent countless hours into the night finding melodies and beats. Even through the long hours, Minghao noticed how much Woozi enjoyed his work. It was his passion. Minghao noticed the time Hoshi spent into figuring out clever choreo for their songs. It was amazing how deticated everyone was to their work. Everyone added their own flair into the songs and dances. Through the observations, Minghao realized how he hadn't added much to the group; maybe he didn't even add anything.

After his sudden revelation, the Chinese boy knew exactly what he had to do: add in his own little flair.

He didn't want the group to notice his sudden change. So he practiced his little flair in secret. Around three in the morning, Minghao would creep out of his bedroom and head to the practice room. Thankful to find it empty, he began b-boying. It started small, a few simple moves he added here and there to the songs. Soon, he was able to b-boy nearly the whole song. He thought that it was an amazing result but the hole in his heart wasn't filled. His idea hadn't satisfied the guilt.

Thinking more b-boying would help, he spent more time b-boying. He continued his practice sessions at three and let a little b-boying move slip out when he was around members. They would compliment him and he'd blush, thinking it was nice to be noticed and appreciated. But, even through his efforts, the guilt was still there.

The amount of b-boying finally took the toll.

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"Minghao, wake up," said a dry voice through the small crack of the door. Minghao groaned and rolled over. "I'm serious Minghao, get up. You've been sleeping for so long."

Minghao stayed put on his bed. He recognize the grumpy voice. Minghao knew quite well that Woozi was never a morning person and if Woozi was awake now, he must have slept in. A lot. Knowing his hyung could barge inside at any moment, Minghao brushed off the blanket and put himself to good use.

At the foot of his bed, he let himself stretch for a long while. All of his muscles ached but he blamed it on all the b-boying. He looked up to view his appearance in a mirror. His cheeks were flushed and his lips pale but he was decent enough. Rubbing his tired face with his hands, he walked outside.

"Wow, you're up late," said Woozi who was sitting idly on a chair, staring. Minghao, uncomfortable from the immense eye-contact his hyung was giving, yawned largely to cover his eyes.

"Yeah," mumbled Minghao after his abnormally long yawn. A few members stared at him oddly. They all felt something was out of place. Minghao, who normally wakes up cheerful, was now a yawning mess. The silence in the room was...uncomfortable...and just felt plain out of place.

Coughing, S.Coups looked at the members and said, "Uh, guys. We have to practice now. So uh, let's go." It was unbearably obvious how awkward the leader was as he tried to disperse the tense atmosphere. The members followed the leader, flocking the exit. Minghao stayed behind, thinking. 'I was the one who made it all tense' thought Minghao as he wanted to facepalm himself. Just as Minghao thought he was alone, Mingyu pops up behind him and places a hand on his shoulder. The skin ship made Minghao jump as his insides sparked.

"Are you okay? You're normally giddy to practice," asked Mingyu. His face was close to Minghao. Maybe a little too close to Minghao's comfort. Gulping, the Chinese boy let out a small, indecipherable whimper.

"What was that?" asked Mingyu as his grip on the boy's shoulder tightened. This small movement cause Minghao to jump again, even more obvious than earlier. "What's wrong. Why did you jump?"

All these questions were arrows at Minghao. He really liked Mingyu. A lot. But if he spoke, he knew his raspy voice was give him away. Shaking his head, Minghao dashed off, leaving a confused Mingyu behind.

Upon reaching the practice room, Minghao was greeted by the relaxed postures of the group members. A few of them laid lazilly on the couch. Some stood in front of the mirrors and stared into their reflection as they gave poses and danced. Others chatted softly. The room lost the tense atmosphere from earlier. Once Hoshi noticed Minghao and Mingyu's arrival, he clapped to get the group's attention.

"Alright guys. Come on, hustle to the center. Gather round," said Hoshi, waving his hands as members began walking to the center. Woozi and S.Coups stood behind Hoshi as he gave an intricate speech on his additional idea for the dance. Minghao tried very very very hard to focus on his hyung's words but his mind drifted elsewhere. In fact, it really drifted off to no where.

After the speech, the members stood in formation. They ran through the dance, adding in interesting moves and taking out boring moves.

Minghao was ready to try to add some b-boying flair, but it failed. For a sick person, dancing this hard hurt. A lot. But Minghao, used to the pain that came with dancing endured it. Just as he was about to b-boy, he tripped and fell to the hardwood floor on his side. A loud thud echoed the room.

The impact was like getting hit by a truck. It knocked the air out of his lungs and left him shaking on the ground, needing air. His desperate gasps of air worried the members.

"Minghao are you okay?" asked Hoshi as he and Mingyu helped lift him off the floor.

"Y-yeah. F-fine," mumbled Minghao. It was as if he lost his lips and the ability to speak. "I'm f-fine."

Minghao had to be honest. Being close to Mingyu eased him up a bit. "Continue," said Minghao through quick breaths.

The worried Woozi could do nothing but nod. He walked to the computer and started the music as members hastily got into formation. Moving through the simple movements was easy for Minghao. The rule was as long as he didn't move his head, he would be fine.

Except, he wasn't fine. Just as he was about to try his b-boying move again, he tripped again and fell with another echoing thud. This time, louder and Minghao's eyes were closed.

"Minghao! Speak!" cried Mingyu who was bent over the poor Chinese boy, frozen in shock. Minghao was like a doll, fragile and unmoving. "Come on wake up!"

Minghao groaned and rolled onto his back. His wet hair stuck to his forehead and his cheeks were red as Christmas lights. His head continued throbbing relentlessly and his chest hurt. No, he hurt all over but he wouldn't acknowledge it.

Woozi and Hoshi glanced at each other when they noticed how sweaty Minghao was when practice had just started minutes ago. 

"G-Guys, I-I'm fine. I n-need space," babbled Minghao as he tried to pull himself up into a sitting position.

S.Coups knew. He knew well that Minghao couldn't dance anymore so he said, "Let's call off dancing for a while. Get a break, we'll start later maybe."

Minghao silently thanked S.Coups for stopping practice. He wasn't sure if he could take another fall or make another dance move.

Many just went back to whatever they were doing earlier. Minghao heard Seungkwan arguing with another member about how he can rap. The small headache Minghao had from earlier swelled up into a full on headache. Imagine getting hit by a textbook. Then imagine that done to you 100 more times. Then imagine you were forced to dance. Yeah, you get the idea.

Minghao, finished with everything and his life, plopped himself onto the couch. He was just beginning to relax when he heard a loud yelp.

"Owowowowow," rambled Dino as he sat on the floor clutching his foot. His wet hair covered his tightly closed eyes. He groaned slightly as he started rocking himself back and forth.

"Dino, what happened?" asked Hoshi who was kneeling beside him. Dino looked up at Hoshi, his eyes slightly wet, and mumbled, "I was dancing and now my foot hurts."

"Hoshi, take Dino somewhere so he can get that checked," said S.Coups. Immediately, Dino was jetted off out the room.

Minghao looked down at his hands. They were slightly red and had floor burns on them. His arms and legs and bruises too from the b-boying. He whispered to himself, 'thank god no one noticed'. But he spoke a moment too soon.

"Hi Minghao," said Mingyu, settling himself close to Minghao. He notices the red burns on the boy's hand and brings them into his large hand. "What happened to your hands?"

Minghao stuffed them together, hiding the burns and muttered quickly, "Nothing."

Mingyu pulled Minghao's hands, accidentally pulling Minghao into his lap. "Let me see it."

"Ow!' yelped Minghao when Mingyu touched the arm he fell on numerous of times. He pulled it close to his chest, protecting it from more harm.

"Sorry," said Mingyu. He could tell something was up so he pressed on. "But can't I see it?"

"I can't!" yelped Minghao pulling his hands closer to him. He could feel his temperature rising and this rapid movement didn't help his aching body and head.

"Please? Come on, we're friends!" begged Mingyu. He gave a large smile and put on large, cute eyes. The kind of equation that made Minghao's heart flutter.

"I'm sorry," whispered Minghao as he pushed Mingyu away and ran out the door. He couldn't believe himself. How could he have run out on Mingyu so many times. 'Mingyu probably hates me now', thought Minghao as he went outside into the city.

He was engulfed by angry slashes of wind against his thin shirt. 'I don't remember it being this windy', thought Minghao as he rubbed his arms. 'Maybe it wasn't a good idea to leave the practice room'. Just as he was about to turn around, the door closed and was locked. 'Dang it' he thought. 

Minghao debated on walking through the city or banging the door for help. With his head not in the right state of mind, you could guess what choice he took.

Even through all the falls, Minghao was able to find a small amount of energy to walk around. His headache still stung and his whole body was still sore but he kept walking and hoping. The strolled helped relieve his mind.

Once Minghao was at a relaxed state of mind, he turned to head back. A small droplet of water dripped on his cheek. Looking up, he saw more rain begin to fall. He was tempted to curse but went against it. He frantically searched for a dry area. His last and only choice was a small alley a many blocks away from the practice room and the dorm. Considering the options, he just had to cope with the small alley.

It was a fine alley, maybe around 7 feet wide and 10 feet deep. Minghao could deal with this small space. He leaned against the red brick wall and slid down to the concrete ground. He held his knees close to his chest to preserve body heat and coughed. It didn't make himself feel any better other than the fact he was sick, which he knew.

'This must be over soon', he thought. The pain inside him worsened as the rain grew stronger. His clothing stuck to his skin and made him shiver. He looked down at his soaked shoes and began closing his eyes. 'At least I can try to sleep it off', he thought. He felt himself numb and the pitter patter of the rain became his lullaby. 'I hope someone finds me'.

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Minghao couldn't describe how he felt. It was like someone attached wings to him and gave him a magical elixir that made him a powerful being. It was like he was in a dream world...that smelled strongly of sanitizer and maybe bleach. What kind of world was so clean everything was coated in sanitizer and bleach. Though given the magical elixir, his body was still numb and his mind fuzzy. Too fuzzy to comprehend anything.

Soon, he officially woke up to the beeping of a monitor. His eyes finally opened and focused. He wasn't in the alley anymore. He was in a hospital room and with him, all the members were there. Some were sprawled, asleep. Others staring into the small bright screen. Others looked down at their hands and feet in silence.

Minghao's gaze stopped at Mingyu. A jolt of pain hit his heart. He could see how much Mingyu was hurting. His back was shaking and his face was buried in his large hands. The sight was enough to make anyone cry. Minghao choked up as his eyes never left Mingyu. He was about to speak when his lungs decided that now was a great time to have a spasm. His coughing fit quickly alerted the members around him.

S.Coups came and patted his back but the soft pats and the beeping monitor were the only noises there. 

"W-What happened?" croaked Minghao dryly.

The room was silent like this was a funeral. Some members gave shy looks at each other as they tried to get someone to talk. Minghao could see clearly the tears beginning to form in everyone's worried eyes.

"W-We noticed you were gone for a long time. S.Coups and Woozi left to look for you a-and they found you in an alley all wet. Y-You were sick. Hypothermia...," mumbled Joshua until the end of his sentence slowly lost volume. He choked and Jeonghan held him close, rubbing his head. Other members nodded and looked down.

"We were all worried about you, hyung," Dino said placing a hand on Minghao's wrist.

"I-I thought...no one...cared."

The members gasped, eyes wide open. Mingyu fell and hugged Minghao. His nose was buried into the crook of Minghao's neck.

"How could you even think that?" said S.Coups, his face stoney.

Minghao looked down at the white sheets.(At least, he tried since Mingyu was hugging him tightly). "I saw everyone helped improve the song and dance...and I didn't."

Now it was Hoshi's turn to be shocked. He cried, "Weren't you listening to the announcement I made earlier!? I was going to add a spot for you to b-boy!"

"Oh."

"You idiot," said Mingyu, voice slightly muffled. "Please don't do that again. Don't hide your pain."

Minghao felt his eyes burn with tears. The guilt in him was no more and the hole was filled with love. "I'm sorry Mingyu. I'm sorry everyone for making you all worry."

Everyone flooded Minghao's arms and in that moment, all was forgiven in that single embrace.

I HAVE NO LIFE D: SO I WRITE FICS FOR FUN...brb gotta get my life together

But anyway, thank's for reading this! It's my first fic so.../tears of joy/ (≧◡≦) Hope you liked it!