The smell of black coffee and fresh pastry, something chocolate-y he thinks, hits him the moment the door opens. A second later he sees Yuta, face down as he carefully toes his shoes off while balancing at least three boxes in his hands.

He feels warm, despite his mood, merely at the sight of his boyfriend. A month without him has been too long, his heart aches for him. It must show on his face because once Yuta notices him his face stops at half of a smile. His eyes widen and he walks quietly and quickly over to where Hansol is sitting on one of their bar stools. He places the cardboard boxes blindly on the counter, not taking his eyes off Hansol and then he steps up to stand between the man’s legs. He traces the dip in Hansol’s brow with his fingers, cups his cheeks and his thumbs under Hansol’s eyes and then he pulls Hansol forward so the man can nestle into his neck and hide his face. Once the warmth of Yuta’s skin meets his cold cheeks, the tears Hansol has so valiantly held back all the way from Busan to here, falls unchecked from his eyes. He cries silently into Yuta’s shoulder as his boyfriend circles into his back and holds him tightly against his own body. Hansol lifts one foot from the rest on the bar stool and wraps his leg around Yuta’s, his bare foot pushing between Yuta’s calves and he pulls him even closer. Hands clutching at clothing, grasping for any kind of support, Hansol does what he can only do with Yuta. He let’s go and opens himself to both the raw hurt of his parent’s rejection and the comfort of his boyfriend’s embrace.

When Hansol starts talking, Yuta tightens his fingers in his boyfriend’s shirt and his eyes well up with tears he can’t ever stop from falling.

“If all else perished, and he remained” Hansol whispers into Yuta’s neck, mostly to himself it seems as he quotes the book they both love. “I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger.”

He tightens his hold on Yuta then, moves his legs and grabs Yuta by the hips to move him as well until the younger boy is seated on his lap, legs dangling freely high from the ground. Hansol holds tight around Yuta’s waist and Yuta wraps one arm around the man’s neck and continues to rub circles into his back. “I love you” Hansol whispers against his throat and Yuta kisses the same words into Hansol’s hair.

“I told my parents” Hansol says after a long stretch of silence. Yuta is surprised, but manages to hold any reaction at bay except for tightening his hold on Hansol for a moment. This is not what he was expecting, but it makes perfect sense. Hansol had been nervous about going back home, reluctant to leave a month ago when they stood in the airport. Yuta had put it down to him dreading the separation of a month and an ocean between them, so near yet so far once he went back to Osaka. He had been reluctant to part from Hansol for that reason, but Hansol must have planned this, had it hanging over him from the go and now it has finally broken him. Yuta remembers talking to Hansol the day before he was set to come back, but there was no sing of this desolate, lost man at that time. He must have told them right before he left, and knowing his boyfriend Yuta can easily imagine the hours on the plane Hansol must have spent in agony trying to hold back everything that he was feeling.

Hansol lets out a single sob after what must have been a minute of them being silent. It is as if he is reacting to the situation in slow motion, all the words spoken hitting him in paces, all the things he feels bubbling in sudden spurts. The moments of silence in between are what really breaks Yuta’s heart.

He can’t even begin to understand what Hansol is going through. He came out to his parents when he was fifteen and they took it like they had been expecting it, only waiting for him to tell them. It was so casual, just another day in their home and the next day his grandmother was nagging at him about making sure to get a nice boyfriend who would treat him right. At the time he hadn’t even thought about telling her.

The burden Hansol has carried for so many years, of knowing his parents would be unable to accept a part of who he is, is one Yuta has never felt. The complete heartbreak Hansol is now going through from having been rejected by the two people who should love him through all, is one Yuta has never experienced. It makes it difficult to find the words to say.

He should have known though, that there is nothing he needs to say. Apart from one thing.

“Tell me you love me” Hansol pleads and with wet eyes and trembling lips Yuta kisses his face over and over and says those three words clearly in between each one.

“What do you want to do now?” Yuta asks carefully a while later. They are still sitting on that bar stool by the kitchen, their hold on each other not quite as firm and Hansol is resting his head against Yuta’s chest, listening to his heartbeat.

“I … I want” Hansol stutters, “I don’t know.” His voice is so small, his entire demeanour is void of that quiet strength he has always exuded, for as long as Yuta has known him. His arms are wrapped around Yuta’s waist, fingers clutching at the material of his sweater, and he feels so small in Yuta’s arms.

“Well, I know what I want,” Yuta says, in an attempt to brighten the atmosphere. “I want coffee, and a new pair of shoes” he speaks slowly, enunciating every word carefully as he pulls Hansol’s head up to look at him. “And you, as happy as you can be.”

Hansol smiles finally, even as it is dimmed compared to the ones Yuta is familiar with.

“Then stay with me,” he says.

“I’ll never leave you.”

Hansol tilts his chin up and takes Yuta’s lips in a kiss that tells of the desperate sadness he feels, but also how his heart is slowly mending with the help of Yuta’s warm hands and never-ending affection.

“Come to bed” Yuta whispers into the fifth, or sixth, kiss, it’s hard to keep track of anything when they do this. Hansol slides his palms up and down the outside of his boyfriend’s thighs and gently pushes him off his lap. They kiss while they walk across the floor and Hansol pulls Yuta’s sweater over his head before pushing the thick off-white curtain aside.

Their bed is unmade, a clear imprint between the pillows and duvet and sheets of where Yuta had lain the night before, alone and clutching a pillow in Hansol’s stead. Hansol crawls onto it, lays on his side and buries his face in the comfort and familiarity of their bed that smells entirely of Yuta and their apple-scented fabric softener. He holds Yuta’s sweater close to his chest and sniffs it a couple times with his eyes locked on Yuta’s smiling ones. Yuta lays down next to him, so close their noses almost touch and as if cued they both go cross eyed looking down at their noses.

“You’re cute” Yuta whispers and leans forward to press a chaste kiss on Hansol’s lips. He sees the shadow fall back over Hansol’s eyes as the moment fades and so he squirms closer, props a pillow up against the headboard and opens his arms to Hansol. The man smiles gently, barely a twitch of the mouth, and scoots right up against Yuta’s body and curls an arm around his waist. Yuta’s arm falls around his shoulders when he rests his head against the younger’s chest and for a long while they stay like that, almost falling asleep but not quite.

An involuntary shudder goes through Yuta’s body when Hansol’s hand slips inside his shirt. He runs his palm firmly across Yuta’s stomach and up his side to rest at his ribs, fingers fitting between the mattress and Yuta’s body. He tilts his head up and zeroes in on a spot right above Yuta’s collar bone, wide in view from the man’s low-necked t-shirt. He left a mark there their last night together, but it has long since faded. Hansol desperately wants to make a new one, so he does. A heavy sigh falls from Yuta’s lips at the sudden bite followed by strong suction and he tightens his hold around Hansol’s shoulders. His hands move quicker than his mind, tugging at Hansol’s shirt long before the stinging pleasure of Hansol a mark into his skin ends.

“You want this?” he asks, just to be sure, once Hansol has pulled his shirt over his head and lain back down. Hansol smiles, bigger this time, far brighter, and pulls at Yuta’s hips with both hands as he rolls onto his back. Yuta settles across his hips and frames Hansol’s head with his arms and they kiss as if they had never kissed before, gentle and explorative, and in a way it feels new. While nothing may have changed between the two of them, the circumstances surrounding their relationship certainly have. They can no longer pretend in their secret haven that everything is perfect. The harsh reality that is always outside their door has suddenly crept inside with it’s serpent hiss. But no matter, they still have each other. The rest of the world could go to hell for all they cared.

I was rereading Emily Brönte's Wuthering Heigths and thought the firt installment in this fic needed a conclusion so there you go. Quote and chapter title is taken from Brönte's novel.

And thank you guys for all your comments. I'm not very good at replying to them, but I read and appreciate every single one.