"There was a huge possibility that this was just a temporary feeling, that this might just be an effect of your overflowing anxiety, which made you want to seek shelter on someone who didn't know the downsides of living. 

However, you wanted to trust on that small but firm tug on your heart that this may be the start of a better life. "

~~ 

Crash. 

'They're at it again' you thought bitterly, picking on your cold breakfast as you listen to your parents fight in their room. You could clearly hear the words they screamed to each other and you wondered what they were fighting about when all you could hear were profanities. You take a sip of water, focusing on its bland taste as you hear high and low pitched chuckles slowly descending the stairs.  

"Really? That's crazy she must've--- Oh it's you" You scowled, hearing the sickly sweet voice of your sister greet you ever so warmly. She stopped a few meters away from you, her hand around a half man's waist as she rolled her eyes. You cringe as the man dips down to kiss her neck, ignoring your presence completely. 

Choosing to ignore her you finished your breakfast as fast as you can, eager to just get the hell out of the house. You were about to stand up when your 'sister' slapped your hand away from your empty plate making you snap your eyes at her. Your sister's eyes were narrowed down to a glare and her nose flared in anger. 

"You don't get the luxury of ignoring me you brat" she spat out angrily. You held back the urge to punch her and instead settled on a scoff.  

"And you get the luxury to random men in the living room whenever you like?" You gritted back out. Your sister's eyes widened and she threw a harsh slap

on your face, the force making you stumble on your feet.  

"You --" She raised her hand to slap you again. You close your eyes and braced yourself for the impact. 

"Babe stop that, the hoe's not worth it" a male voice interrupted. You felt your blood start to boil. 

Did he just call me a hoe? You glowered at the buff man in front of you who was pulling your sister into his chest. Your sister glared at you. "You're pretty damn lucky my man pities you enough to save your poor " She barked, kissing 'his man's jaw as she gave him one of her disgusting smiles. You almost gagged. 

"I'd rather die than having a  save my " You emphasized, picking up your bag and briskly walking out the house, ignoring your sister's screams of protest. You could feel your eyes burning with unshed tears but you blinked them back, not wanting to waste tears on people like them. You walked straight to nowhere, your knees getting weaker for every mile you walked. Your cheeks still stung, but it was nowhere near the pain you experienced every single day. 

You snapped out of your trance and found yourself at a park. It was early and only a few people were around which gave you a slight feeling of relief. You took a seat on one of the benches and closed your eyes as the wind blew. You thought about everything. 

Why did you have to be treated like this? 

How did everything end up this way? 

What did you do to deserve this kind of suffering? 

You did everything your parents wanted you to. You were one of the smart students in class, you didn't go to parties every weekend, you made studying your hobby, and you loved them so much. You had rejected confessions from men whom you were actually attracted to, and you placed their happiness before yours.

You didn't know what you did wrong.  

You were lost.  

Maybe there were other things you could've done 

Maybe they weren't enough 

Maybe you had to try harder 

But in the end, nothing you ever did was enough. A single mistake exceeded all your sacrifices and achievements, and all you could do was accept it and start again. You were tired. You were tired of spending hours of endless sobbing in your room. You were tired of being weak. 

You felt tears threaten to spill from your eyes without your consent, but before you could let them fall down, you heard a small whimper. You opened your eyes in curiosity, scanning the almost empty park with a blurred vision and your eyes landed on a boy about your age about 5 meters away from you. He was crouched on the ground and you couldn't see his face with his back facing you. However, you noticed his shoulders slightly trembling as if he was crying. 

Deciding not to interfere with a stranger's business you dragged your eyes away, only for it to be focused back to him when you heard another whimper. He was now trembling more visibly and was whipping his head side to side as if looking for someone to help him. You bit your bottom lip, hesitating.  

What if the guy's a ert? You thought. You stare at his helpless form. 

Oh it, you never know  

Silently, you stood up and walked towards him, stopping just behind his back. You could feel your fingers twitch and you finally tap his rather broad shoulders to catch his attention. He jumped at the sudden touch, looking back at you so fast you flinched in surprise as well. Dark brown, and not to mention watery, eyes met yours and your breath hitched.  

He was beautiful. 

You stare at each other for a solid ten seconds, before his eyes watered even more and his lips started trembling. Your eyes went wide and your heartbeat quickened in panic. You pulled your hand back quickly, your head going blank. 

"Woah woah woah there d-did I do something wrong? S-Should I just leave you or something?" You stuttered out, not knowing why the hell the handsome kid was crying and how you were supposed to calm a guy possibly the same age as you, or if not older. You took a step back but then he was grabbing your arm suddenly. 

"C-Can you--- no, please help me!" He begged desperately, his grip on you tightening as he looked down on something he was holding closely on his chest. You blinked in confusion and leaned closer. 

You gasped. He was holding a kitten with an injured arm. 

You softened. You've always loved animals and always had a soft spot for them, and seeing a kitten no more than two months old bleeding is making you feel worried. You gently kneeled down and the kitten's fur, and your heart ached when it gave a weak meow. 

"What happened to her?" You asked, your eyes not leaving the animal's blood stained form. 

"I-I don't know.. I j-just found her at the side of the s-street and p-picked her up" the unknown man choked out, holding back tears. You nodded and took the kitten into your arms and stood up. The man stood up abruptly, looking at the animal with a worried gaze. You bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from smiling. 

"I know a pet clinic close here, would you like to come with me?" You asked him, holding back a smile when you saw him nod vigorously. 

"Y-Yes please!" 

-- 

"I'm so glad the doctor said she was okay" You breathed out, exiting the brightly lit pet clinic with the nameless young man still trailing behind you. The small animal had a broken bone, but the doctor said she'd be fine in a month. 

"Me too" he uttered, stopping right where he was, causing you to turn around to look at him curiously. He had his head hung low and fists clenched. He was opening and closing his mouth repeatedly and you could see a furious pink covering his face and ears. You blinked. 

"Um. Are you okay---" 

"I-I-I um... Th-Thank you s-so much f-for helping me out there, I-I-it must've bothered you but I-I c-can't apologize since if you weren't there sh-she would've..." He stammered, trailing off by the end of his confession. Your heart melted.  

How can a 20 year old be so naive and innocent? You thought to yourself. You were slightly envious of the boy close to tears in front of you. You were once like that. A crybaby, a person who was easily scared, the kind of person people wanted to protect, childish and ignorant, but also, a person who saw the world in its most beautiful form. 

You wondered if you could ever see the world like that again. 

You walked towards him, and as if you were possessed you cupped his cheeks in your hands, lifting his face up to meet your eyes. You smiled at him.  

"Hey it's fine. She'll be okay no need to get too emotional about it and plus, you saved her and not me" you said softly, lightly rubbing his cheeks with your thumb. He stared at you, and you couldn't help but get entranced by him. His eyes, that seemed to hold the entire universe, caught most of your attention and you found yourself unable to look away. You knew this was wrong. You knew it was wrong for you to feel like this for a stranger you just met minutes ago, and you never thought you would ever be so stupid to let yourself feel like this, but you couldn't pull away. 

Or rather, you didn't want to, as stupid as that sounded. 

The nameless man stared at you like how you did to him, and butterflies erupted in your stomach thinking that maybe, he felt the same attraction as you did.

That maybe, it wasn't one sided. 

The two of you found yourselves being pulled towards each other, your gaze falling down to his plump lips as you drew closer. You were merely a centimeter away when your phone rang, making you freeze on the spot.  

Realizing what was happening, the boy jumped away from you and blushed furiously. His pupils were shaking in embarrassment as he brought his arm over his lips.  

"I-I-I'm so--" You pressed a finger on his lips and shushed him. Your cheeks were also burning and had a visible pink hue, but you tried to not think much about it and pulled out your still ringing phone. You looked at the screen. 

Mom it read. You sighed. 

"I have to answer this, could you wait a bit?" You said barely above a whisper, you could feel shame slowly creeping up your system the longer you stared at him, and you coughed out. He nodded quickly and you held yourself back from not answering the damn phone and return to what you were doing awhile ago.  

Controlling yourself, you quickly picked up. 

"Hello?" 

"Where are you? Why did you leave without permission? You don't have classes today." Your mom croaked, her voice hoarse at all the yelling she had with your

dad. You grit your teeth. 

Glad you noticed. 

"Sorry mom, I just went out to take a walk. Did you want to talk about something?" There was a short silence at the other line before your mom sighed. 

"Yea I'd like you to be here in 10 minutes. Your father and I have something to talk to you about." She said and hanged up. You groaned. 

The boy's wide doe eyes stared at you patiently, and you couldn't help but compare him to a loyal puppy. He had his hands clasped together and stood straight, similar to how a child would wait for their parents to pay attention to them. You bit the inside of your cheeks, holding back a smile at the endearing boy. 

"I guess I have to go now. My mom said she needed to talk to me." His face fell. 

"Oh" He looked down, shifting in his place as he bit his bottom lip, the look of disappointment never leaving his baby face. You chuckled and handed him your phone. He looked at it in surprise, gaze shifting between you and the gadget on your hand. 

"If you want we could meet up later... If you would ever so kindly give me your number" You told him. He flushed again and hesitantly took your phone, carefully punching his number and saving it. He let out a small smile that made your heart skip a beat and returned your phone to you. 

You looked at the contact name, Jeon Jungkook. 

You smiled. 

"I guess I'll see you later Jungkook! Oh, and by the way, the name's Y/N! " You called out at him before running off home in high spirits. Not having the chance to see Jungkook turn around and smile widely as he muttered your name softly to himself, a pleasant feeling coiling in his stomach at the thought of you. 

-- 

"W-What did you say?" You choked out, a lump stuck down your throat as you listened to every word your mom was saying.  

Your mom sighed. 

"As I've said Y/N, your dad and I have decided to file a divorce" 

You couldn't breathe. Your gaze shifted to the people whom you called mom and dad alternately, trying to spot something, a sign of hesitation, a sign of pain, of distraught, of anything to prove that they were lying. However, you were met by dull, emotionless eyes that seemed to haunt you. 

Your heart dropped. 

"W-Why? What's wrong? You c-can't--- I mean--" You choked, pupils shaking ever so slightly as you pictured yourself being separated from one of the two people who meant the most to you, to be separated from the people for whom you sacrificed so much for, and for one or both of them to replace each other in the

near future. 

And as expected, you couldn't swallow that fact ever in your whole life. 

"Why the would you even think of doing that?!" You were yelling now, your lungs burning as you felt hot tears fall down freely on your face. Every joint in your body lost its energy and you felt like collapsing. Rational thoughts left your mind one by one, leaving behind desperate and foolish reasons. 

Your parents were surprised at your sudden outburst but maintained their composure, their lips pressed in a tight line as you panicked. 

You hated that. You hated how calm they were. You hated how they could take the issue so lightly as if it was a trivial matter. You hated how they took your emotions so lightly. You hated your father. You hated your mother. You hated your sister. 

You loathed all of them.  

"Listen Y/N, these past months all we've done is fight and we don't think a relationship like this should be continued--" Your mother tried to reason out, but you didn't want any explanation. 

"So ing what?! You've been together for more than 20 ing years! You've had fights before! But you always solved it! What's the difference now?!" You screamed, wheezing. Your dad opened his mouth to speak but you didn't let him. No, you were the one who'll do all the talking this time. You were gonna tell them every single thing you felt in these torturing months.  

"Yes I did know that these months you were always fighting but it wasn't only you who ing suffered in those months. Because of your mothering fights your attention has been drawn away from all the sacrifices I have done for you, you never appreciated the achievements my sister and I have accomplished because all you were doing was yelling at each other's faces all day! 

"Did you even know that I won a gold medal at swimming?! Did you know that I became the top of our class?! Did you know that when parents were supposed to come to the awarding ceremony and you weren't there, I walked down the stage by myself while my other classmates smiled with their parents beside them?! And you call Hyeri a for bringing different men in this house, but did you even acknowledge the fact that she got accepted in the company you wanted her to work in?! She got accepted! But then you were too busy throwing mothering plates at each other!" You sobbed uncontrollably, tears endless as you let out everything. You were pretty sure you looked like a wreck right now but you didn't care.  

All that mattered was that you were finally able to tell them. They finally knew your pain. They finally knew your sister, Hyeri's pain whom you have learned to hate as well because of how she dealt with your parents' issues. They finally knew that it wasn't you who brought this pain upon yourself but them. Your own parents. 

"I hate you. I hate you so ing much" You whispered. 

You heard your mom sniff and softly approach you. She was crying. 

How dare she. 

"D-Dear I'm so sorry--" She reached out to you but you slapped her hand away, cold eyes meeting her damp ones as you chuckled lifelessly. 

"You think that's enough?" You growled lowly, having enough of the bull you've been put through.  

With all your remaining energy, you turned around and stomped out the house, brushing off your 'mother's arms when she tried to pull you back. You needed to get out of that house. 

It took awhile to finally hear your mother's sobs dissipate in the wind, as you stumbled your way towards the park. The walk seemed endless with your tears still falling down your cheeks. People looked at you concerned, but you ignored them and continued walking, wondering where the tears come from and why they never stopped.  

Although you felt like losing consciousness then and there, you forced yourself to go on, wanting to see the person who have stolen your heart at just a glance. 

Jeon Jungkook. 

You thought about him. Everything about him. He was the epitome of perfection. He was pure, innocent, kind, selfless, and gorgeous. It was as if all the evil and

negativity in the world feared to taint him, to taint his immaculate soul.  

Meanwhile, you were his polar opposite. You were desperate, sad, weak and selfish. Yet here you were, walking towards where you first met, hoping to catch a glimpse of those plump lips you had almost had a taste of. You weren't worthy of him, and yet you continued to look for a faint chance, hoping that maybe this time, something would go right for you. 

You were greeted by the familiar scent of the fresh grass of the park, and it would have comforted you, but there was no Jungkook to be found. 

And then, your walls broke down. 

You fell on your knees and sobbed, your form trembling as you gripped the weeds that grew on the ground tightly, wincing as you felt sharp rocks dig into your skin painfully, causing blood to rush out of the fresh wounds. Your skin was tingling in desperation, pure hatred coating your heart as you squeezed your chest, urging the pain to go away but failing helplessly. You screamed, and then realized nobody would ever bother listening. 

You were alone. Always have, and always will be. 

It felt like hours until you finally felt yourself beed by the numbness of pain. You weakly scooted towards the closest tree, leaning on its trunk as you brought your knees to your chest tightly, welcoming the mixed smell of grass and blood. You buried your head into your arms, taking slow deep breaths, when all of a sudden, a familiar voice called out your name. 

"Y/N?" Your breath hitched. 

It was him. 

You inched closer to the trunk, hiding your face deeper into your arms, not wanting him to see how pathetic and helpless you were. "D-Don't come any closer"

You choked out. 

Jungkook stopped in his tracks and stared at you. He was confused, worried, and scared.  

There you were, curled into a ball, shivering with your hair disheveled and messy. He recalled just how happy you seemed to be awhile ago, and how excited you had seemed to be of the thought of seeing him again, but here you were, sniffing as you choked out incoherent words as you tried to convince him to leave you

alone. His chest tightened and you could almost hear his labored breathing as he struggled to keep his emotions at bay. 

He hated seeing people cry, especially those who meant a lot to him. 

He slowly knelt down to your figure, brows knitting together in pain as you trembled. 

"Y-Y/N... W-What's wrong? D-Did I do something?" He choked out, dropping his bag on the floor as he tried to reach out to you, but you just moved away further, hiding your face even deeper into your arms if that was possible. The tears were back as soon as you heard Jungkook's voice, and you couldn't even stop it.  

Jungkook's heart was pounding. 

What do I do? She's crying oh my god. Y/N's crying. I'm so ing useless. She doesn't deserve such a wimp.  He thought, biting the insides of his cheeks to stop himself from crying, but failing miserably. 

You froze when you heard a small choke coming from the man in front of you. You slowly lifted your head to look at him, and found him kneeling across you with his head on his hands as he unconsciously let out faint sobs. 

Is he being serious right now? 

"Y-Yah! Why are you--?" 

"I'm sorry... I-I'm sorry Y-Y/N, that I'm so useless... I couldn't e-even cheer y-you up, and h-here I am crying as well.. I'm such a crybaby I k-know b-but I really d-

don't want to make y-you mad at m-me" he breathed out between sniffs. Butterflies erupted in your stomach at his words. Seeing his trembling form in front of

you, made you want to protect him, to protect him from all the bad things in life, even if you may be the one who's the most dangerous. You've never had anyone cry for you before, and somehow, it was refreshing, and you wanted to keep the feeling forever.  

You were selfish, but you didn't care. 

You shuffled towards him, softly grabbing his hands away from his face making him blush and look away from you in embarrassment. He's so cute. 

"You're an idiot you know that?" You smiled at him. He snapped to you with a blush and was about to explain, but you crashed your lips against his making him freeze. He had a faint taste of mint and raspberries, a weird combination but you couldn't get enough of it. It took a while before he finally responded and you've never felt so complete your whole life. It was warm, and perfect. It was paradise. 

You pulled away and stared at his beautiful face as it shifted from one color to another. It was like watching sunrise on the top of a cliff, mesmerizing and enchanting. It was addictive and soothed your nerves in a way you never thought was possible. 

How could an naïve boy bring out such outrageous feelings from a person like me? You thought, as you bask yourself in his innocence as if it could purify your soul. There was a huge possibility that this was just a temporary feeling, that this might just be an effect of your overflowing anxiety, which made you want to seek shelter on someone who didn't know the downsides of living. 

However, you wanted to trust on that small but firm tug on your heart that this may be the start of a better life. 

You gave him a knowing smile, holding his large hand tightly in your own, as if he was going to run away anytime soon. 

"Hey Jungkook... Will it be okay if I don't let you go?"