Kyungsoo was pissed.

He was really pissed off right now.

Why you may ask?

Because that ing, good for nothing, gorgeous as cry baby, with no freaking balls (well he actually has - Kyungsoo actually likes his balls but for now... Let's just say that Kyungsoo would very much like to cut those jiggly bits loose) just let SM E with their relationship status!

Well to be fair its not like Kyungsoo and Jongin were going around with a 'were-exclusively-dating-and-will-get-married-in-America-and-migrate-there-specifically-in-San Diego-after-our-retirement-and-buy-a-house-and-adopt-a-baby-boy' sign, but still!

Kim ing Jongin should have just let the other members foot the bill, but no!

Kim Jongin had to be all mentally matured and grown up and was now tasked to calm Kyungsoo down, because he - MENTALLY MATURED AND SANE DO KYUNGSOO, LEAD VOCALIST OF EXO, POPULARLY KNOWN AS D.O. - was 'being an irrational' (as their manager said) and (this one was from the stupid third party of the B-Bama love team --->) 'he might trigger a nuclear attack on South Korea's SM Entertaiment' - don't even ask how he's going to get the launch codes (remember Baek and Obama? Well that's a dead give away. *wink*. Don't even ask the why 'why would Baekhyun ask for the launch codes?' cause you'd surely end up with him hanging upside down from the Eiffel tower).

"Hyung, everyone has a lot of problems right now and I don't want this to be added to their worries..."

"And you don't have any problem right now?! Well, I'll gladly make myself your biggest predicament!"

"I do! I do have problems... But compared to theirs, mine pales in comparison." Eyes searching for Kyungsoo's understanding.

"Why not Minseok Hyung? Jongdae? Chanyeol? Sehun? Joonmyeon? Yi Xing? Baekhyun or even me?! Why not any of us? Why does it have to be you?!" Kyungsoo hissed through his gritted teeth.

Kyungsoo needs to hold a pillow right now or else he's gonna start plucking his hairs out because of frustration (not only the hairs in his head might I add).

Noticing his twitchy hands (it happens when Kyungsoo is frustrated, sad, or nervous or just has this urge to strangle Baekhyun or castrate Chanyeol) Jongin reached out for it and held it tightly.

"We both know that Baekhyun Hyung can't. He already did it before. Yi Xing Hyung will gladly take this off my shoulders but he has got so much stuff going on right now that this will ultimately break him."

Kyungsoo was about to speak but Jongin touched his lips as if saying 'quiet, let me talk first'. He was half tempted to bite that stupid finger off (and half tempted to it).

"It can't be you 'cause I don't want you to suffer from the fans bashing and besides, you're actively acting right now same with Sehun and Chanyeol. This will hurt the viewer rates. Joonmyeon Hyung, even if he really wanted to, can't. He has his family issues right now. Let's spare him this."

"Minseok Hyung and Jongdae will gladly save you from this!"

"Yes they would, but we know that Minseok and Jongdae Hyung have been offered musical roles so they can't. The ticket sales might not go so well, we've seen it before. So there's no other choice but me."

"But Jongi---"

"I'm not that busy. I don't have any acting offers right now I have an injury so I can actually rest for a short while. All I have lining up for me are the photoshoots that I stole from all of you and some advertisements.." Jongin let a breathless laugh go.

He sighed and looked at Kyungsoo "Hyung please understand. This doesn't mean that I have to date Krys. We just have to take photos then let some sasaeng and dispatch see us. Then after that well be 'laying low' then poof, everything will just go away."

Kyungsoo was looking at their interlocked fingers feeling Jongin's warmth seep though his skin, calming his irritated nerves "I'm gonna grill Yi Fan Hyung and Luhan because of this." - not that calm I suppose - voice laced with the intention of castrating (Kyungsoo has this sadistic tendency to imagine that he'll let people suffer in the long run.... His methods are usually drowning, strangling and his favorite: castrating - people inside his head) the offenders.

Jongin can't do anything but laugh. Kyungsoo is so adorable this way (yup! Jongin sees Kyungsoo as the Kyungroro to his Crongin - don't ask.. Just don't.)

"Kris Hyung sent me 3 kinds of emails when he heard from Joonmyeon Hyung. He sent it to my current number, my personal email ad and to my kakao. All of the messages were written separately and I think it was composed of at least 100 words or more describing how sorry he is."

"How about Luhan?"

"He called after hearing it from Minseok Hyung and receiving a message from both Kris Hyung and Tao, who was notified by Sehun. He was really sorry. He called me yesterday at 4:07am."

Kyungsoo sighed. He knew that it wasn't their fault and that Luhan and Yi Fan Hyung saying sorry was not right. They only did what was best for them.

Who should Kyungsoo drown now?

He can't drown a building and drowning their current CEO, PYM, would be a herculean task - because of bodyguards, hello! It's not only Kyungsoo who has a vendetta towards that man, they're particularly lining up, led by Heechul Hyung then followed by Lee SoMan himself, then GG members, him and so on and so forth - not to mention the fans, so PYM practically employed the whole of South Korea's and North Korea's military-men-power combined just to guard him.

Noticing that Kyungsoo went still and quiet. Jongin used this opportunity to reach out and crash Kyungsoo to his chest. Encircling him with his arms and inhaling in his 'angelic' scent. (Yes, Kim Jongin is a lost cause).

"It might be hard the first few months and there'd be a lot of bad issues and articles about me, but I would like to think that 'I did it for the team' and imagine that - even if it's just one - a fan might actually understand and read between the lines and believe me in my promise."

Kyungsoo reached out his hand caressing Jongin's cheek "What promise?"

Jongin smiled and held on to that hand, leaned a little bit and let it calm his heart. "The promise that I'll never have a girlfriend."

"Of course you won't... Not unless I undergo surgery..."

"You don't need too, Hyung. Just wear a wig."

With that they both laughed.

A few months later....

[APRIL 1, 2016]

EXO's KIM JONGIN POPULARLY KNOWN AS KAI - LEAD DANCER OF THE GROUP - HAS BEEN DATING F(x)'s KRYSTAL...

Dispatch has taken a few.......

[A FEW HOURS LATER]

SM E CONFIRMS THE DATING SCANDAL BETWEEN EXO's KAI AND F(x)'s KRSYTAL

[A FEW HOURS MORE]

KRIS AND LUHAN'S SETTLEMENT CASE....

A/N & disclaimer:

I don't own any of the EXO members and everything written in here is just purely vomited by the unicorn that resides in my brain.

(But if I did own an EXO member then it'd be Oh Sehun, even if Jongin is my first kpop and only kpop bias, I just have a thing for the Se-booty..)

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I don't have anything against KaiXKrystal and I know that it's Jongin's right to date, he can't be single forever and he can't marry Kyungsoo, 'cause there's a 60% chance that none of them are gay.... but inside my head they are, so, thus this story.

Comments & subscriptions (onegaii~) would make me very happy... (*^____^*)

Critics would be welcome as well... Just please don't make it as harsh as a complete whooping, a little or a lot of slaps would be welcome though.                          (/°__°)/ O \(•∆•\)

peace out v(^o^)v

-g