“You are not mine, but sometimes I pretend that you wish you were.”

I saw him with his pretty boyfriend again today. They were holding hands, sharing sweet glances that made me want to vomit all over them. Their relationship sickens me to the core. Out of all the people, why did it have to be him? Oh Sehun has just recently started dating Lu Han, and I had never been more jealous of anyone other than Lu Han. I had always admired, took care of and interacted with Sehun, but it seems that all my actions were irrelevant. He didn't put me into mind before deciding to date Lu Han. Were my clues not obvious enough? Or does he simply not like me back?

“I create this idea that you secretly want me.”

No, he probably likes me back. I just know it. We've been friends for God knows how long, it would be a total lie if he didn't find any part of me attractive or anything, right? He likes me; I just know it. He's just confused with his feelings right now, and that's why he's dating Lu Han instead of me. He just needs time to choose between me and Lu Han, that's all. When the time comes, he'll choose me. I just know it. I scoffed their way as they shared a peck in public. 

“..and I often forget it's just something I've made up.”

I should stop lying to myself, really. I should stop talki