They choose him to be with her. But he keep his feeling around me.

He love me.

He choose her to hide our relationship, but I know he start to love her.

I know, but ..

“the car is already outside” a staff infrom us. He nodded his head.

“just go with them” he said to her,

“okay”

“they will bring you to my appartment , but I’m not there for this night”

“I got it” she said as she walk leave us.

I don’t know how she feel toward him. Is she love him? Or she just use to it. I see nothing on her face towards him, but I don’t know..

“we can spend a little longer here” he said, I just nodded my head. I watch she is run a little bit for make her step faster. The paparazi plus fanatic fans already there, in front of the club. he also watch her step. I know.

Sometimes I feel so stupid living between the drama. My real life drama, I even know his scenario. So easy to read it even he hide it. Maybe we already know for this long time so I can read his mind just like a book without he saying the truth. I keep silent when he’s still shut his mouth. He want her to be here with him.

“I want go home right now” I said , he look at me with his unbelieve face. I already agree to stay a little bit longer here with him but suddenly I said I wanna go home.

“Bom?”

“I feel tired” Yes I’m tired with this drama. I will go end it soon. It will end soon even I’m not the PD. I promise, it will end and I will choose the right time for end it.

“am I did something wrong?” he ask me, I shook my head.

“so?”

“I said I’m just tired. You can go to your apartment and meet her. She will go back to japan tomorrow right? You should accompany her”

“Bom”

“Oppa, I wanna go home right now” I said to my manager. He nodded and quickly out from the room for prepare the car.

“I’m go with you” he said again. I shoot a death glare to him.

“I don’t care, I go with you”

“I want go alone Ji” I said, try too calming myself.

“you know, even you said to leave you alone”

“Ji!!!” I raise my voice, it’s make all the people on this room throw their gaze on me. I don’t care.

“what?!” he use the same tone,

“I said leave me alone!”

“what did I do before?! Tell me if I did something wrong!” Young bae start to calming him. I know he’s tired right now after the tour he just want to spend his time with me. It should be my fault. But I can’t , I can’t hold all of this anymore. Too tired for hide it alone. I just can share my feeling to the Yang sajang the one who never let me frustate. He always ask me whenever I had a problem. He even force me to share my problem. But I need someone who really care for me. Who understand me right now.

“I’m sorry” he said as he hug me tight. I try to let off his body then leave the room.

“call me when you need me, I will go to studio after this!” I heard he talk behind me. I keep walk leaving the club with another door.

....

Did you love her?

Yes I love her.

Who?

Which one?

...

I don’t know , I love both of them.

How about Bom?

Oh God! I love her to death!! I can’t leave her, I even can’t live without her. I love her. I love her so much. She’s my everything!

Then, how about her? The one girl that you ask personally to be your fake girlfriend. You love her too.

...

Yeah, I love her. She’s different. She has a unique personality. It’s make me more curious about her. I can’t help but she always make me happy.

Bom did that too right?

Stupid!

“!” I curse at myself. Seems like I talk to myself again. It always happen when I think about those two girl that I love. Stupid, even my brain said that I’am stupid. I should choose one of them. I can’t leave Bom. I don’t like if she close with another guy. She should be mine forever. But whenever I start to choose her then her figure ruin my decision.

“you can’t live with those two girl. You should choose one of them” I heard a voice behind me. It’s Young Bae.

“I know”

“so?”

“I still can’t choose one of them”

“yaish stupid!”

“then, give Park Bom noona for me! I will marry her verry soon! Plus I will not allow you to meet her! Go choose her! And give Bom noona to me!” he said again to me and make my eyes open wide with his rude word.

“you dare!!”

“yah yah this two child!” Teddy hyung come inside my studio.

“he’s stupid hyung” Young Bae said.

“let him to choose Young Bae-ah”

“poor Bom noona, she should be meet a nice perfect man not this bastard” Young Bae said as he shook his head feel so pitty.

“hyung! Make him go away in front of me” I’m begging to Teddy hyung.

“I should ask Bom noona to go to blind date, I have a lot -” Young Bae still try to make me upset,

“Ya!! Young Bae! You dare?! Go away from here just goo!!!!” I start to push his body and make him gone.

“actually I agree with him” Teddy hyung start to talk after Young Bae gone.

“what now?” I ask him.

“don’t you think about Boms feeling Ji? She know everything even you didn’t told her. She know you also love her I mean that little girl” I start to listen him.

“you think why Bom suddenly feel tired? You think why Bom suddenly change her mind and you think why Bom suddenly get mad at you because you”

I choose to go to her home after I finish my work at the YG studio. I miss her. So bad. She’s still sleep peacefully beside me. Rubbing her hair as I kissed her forehead and her lips many time but she doesn’t move her body. Maybe she’s really tired right now. Sleep is the right madicine. Slowly close my eyes then sleep with her.

I miss her smile. Her cute smile that she never show it anymore infront of me. Maybe Teddy hyung is right. She know everything and she must be hurt inside knowing her lovely boyfriend have another feelings toward another girl. I hug her body tight.

“I’m sorry for hurt you. I love you” I whispered to her.

....

Wake up with him beside me. Since when he come to my room? Mom should change the code of this home seriously. Look at his dark circle under his eyes. I miss him. I miss this moment when I wake up beside him. His scent. I miss all of it. I miss how happy I’am  to be with him before that girl come to our live of course. I take a deep breath then take my phone near my bed for checking news update today.

G-Dragon pick up his girl with his sport car!

G-Dragon bring his girl to his apartment after party!

G-Dragon officialy date his girl on the club last night!

G-Dragon , G-Dragon , G-Dragon and many more about him and her I read. Suddenly I feel hurt on my chest. Oh this is not right. When it will end? For the first time I agree but now I’m with this , oh what kind of this?

Suddenly my phone was grab by him. I gasp. He’s already wake up and now he checking my phone. He must be read all the news about him now. I see he turn off my phone then kiss my lips.

“Good morning” he said with his sleepy head. I just keep silent looking at him.

“I know you tired because of this” he said. No, Not just for this. All the rumors about me then now I know you have a feelings toward her is enough for make me tired of this life.

“we should broke up” I said, as I expect.. he open wide his eyes not beliave with what I just said.

“I’m serious” I said again. He must be will said that I’m joking around but this time I really sure with my decision.

“Bom, please not again” yea we, no... me , its me who always ask for broke up. I can’t really handle this anymore.

“Ji, understand me please.. not just this news which stab me right now. But I’am too tired about my own rumors and now I should thinking about yours?! You never understand me Ji, I try to understand you alot of the time but please , for this one.. set me free” I said. I’m begging to him.

“I can’t live without you” he said,

“then start to live with her, you love her. I know, you can’t lie to me. Now, hows your feel when I had another feeling towards another guy? You must be mad at me. But.. how can I mad? Even your fans is already open their heart for her. It’s hurt me alot. I’m just human Ji. I can’t hold this anymore”

“fine” he hug me tight as he standing in front of me who still sit on my bed.

“I just want we’re just break this relation. Not meant that we broke up Bom. I just give you a time for alone. And , I swear I will take a distance. But I don’t want to broke up please”

“you have to choose” I said. Silent. He’s not answer me.

....