So...I know that you guys must be wondering why I posted up some sad lyrics over the past month....right???

WELL.......that would be explained right now...........

Over the past month, I've been going through some really deep because of my ex-girlfriend.........(no surprise)........and it really .......CAUSE SHE DON'T KNOW HOW TO LISTEN WHEN SOMEONE IS TRYING TO TELL HER SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So.....it left me kind of depressed about everything and the lyrics to the songs matched perfectly to my mood at the time so I just decided to post the lyrics

Plus.......this is her fault and in no way mine.........(THE HARD TRUTH!!!!!!!!)

This started 3 weeks ago......on a Tuesday...........

ONCE UPON A TIME..............

I had gone out with my roomate and he co-workers to Chili's for a dinner/get together thing. Towards the ending of the night, she had texted me saying "Do you still associate yourself with Kyungsoo?"

(I put Kyungsoo because another friend of mine really likes Kyungsoo)

So, I had said "Yes...why???"

Then she was like: "Can you ask her what she likes?"

Then I said: "Why don't you ask her yourself?"

Then she said: "I don't have her number. and blah blah blah"

(I had to put blah blah blah because I don't understand what she was trying to say........I think she was like half asleep when she texted me......)

Then, when I was about to reply to her. She said: "You know what nevermind. You are so difficult to commuicate with and to forget that I had even asked"

Then I stared at her messages and replied to her saying: "But....I already asked her"

Then she had told me: "You know one of these days we need to have a talk because I'm getting mad all the time when I think about you. Mostly because you spread rumors about me but also because you get to my brain a lot."

So.......I never replied to her because I thought that if she hated me and that she got irritated because she was thinking of me or the other stuff then I wouldn't talk to her to make her happy..............................

APPARENTLY, I WAS WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So......the next day at work...........I was really pissed off at her because she wrote a blog about me and writing stuff that really hurt me......emotionally and mentally..........we were setting up for the Taiko drumming performance at our work place.

Then she tells me: "I'm mad at you for not replying to me"

Physically.....I stopped walking......in my head though it was a different story.........and of course that made me more mad...........

Tell me not everyone.......would you be mad at someone for not replying to a text or be mad at them for writing on a blog post....and it wasn't true.......

To top it off she told me: "Please whatever you do don't break up with your BOYFRIEND!!!!!!!"

Like what the actual nuggets dude!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So,I pinched her cheeks cause it would have been the 8th time that I tried to explain to her that.......Me NO HAVE boyfriend.......because I still loved her a lot and that no other person was on my mind but her......(would you have hid it instead of telling your ex that????)

She had overheard me and my roomate talking about her best friend the day before Halloween andshe had assumed that he was my boyfriend........NOT TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was just telling the roomate that I like her friend better because he treats her better than her own boyfriend........but she had only heard the part where I said that I liked him better.........so yeah

Then the next day (Thursday) she had told our boss that I was bullying and abusing her.........seriously.......when or where would I have the time to do that......I work 19 hours a week and have to get the job done before 5pm (or 8pm on Wednesdays) everyday......PLUS if I did abuse she would have been covered in bruises and crap.........am I right????

So.......I got hurt AGAIN because I was on the verge of being fired for something that I never did......and I could have gotten her fired for calling my friend Xuimin, a derogatory name while we were working........but I didn't........

Then when I tried to explain my side of the story no one wanted to hear it......they only believed her side of the story and that got me really upset..........so I ended up quitting that Saturday.......and I thought that she would leave it at that............................................

I WAS WRONG AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!

She posted something to my wall and that hurt me so badly...........oh......did I mention that her entire family (except maybe her sister????) hates me because of everything that happened?????? Another thing.....the only reason she posted that thing on my wall was because she was mad at me because she wanted to quit first from the job..........like really??????

In the 3 weeks that this has happened a lot of things have happened to me.....

#1. I had tried to commit suicide 3 times

#2. I was feeling really depressed and couldn't tell my mom about it

#3. I was really hurt because I didn't think that she would do that to me

#4. I fell really behind in school, and I only have until tomorrow (Decemebr 3) to finish everything in 5 different classes (it's not easy being a college freshman)

#5. I am so unprepared for my final exams

All in all.......this entire situation had hurt me a lot andI appreciate AFF for being there to let me rant and to bless the poor souls that had to listen to me rant.....you poor things......so this is the reason for my depressing songs blog......................