My depression is almost getting too much. I'm sitting here all alone, waiting. Waiting for the girl I fell in love with to get home from work. I'm at her house, spending the week. But the thing is... She only sees me as a friend. She has a boyfriend. I wish I could just turn off my emotions and keep my heart from breaking. I wish she would see that I love and care for her deeply. I've been crying for these past few hours contemplating on telling her. I'm afraid to ruin our friendship. I'm afraid to get rejected.. Rejection may be the thing that sets me off. I've been struggling with the urges to just end it all. I've talked to multiple people about my problems.. Even professionals. They all say that I am just confused. That these feelings aren't real. Well if they aren't real then why does my heart flutter when she smiles? When she hugs me or holds my hand? And why does my heart break when she kisses him? These feelings.. They're real.