I really really want to die n kill myself over n over again.. I feel so frustrated. .. it has always been the same mistake again and again. . It always follow w regret,haunting me down every single day in my memory. . I want to run away n be alone n die quietly.  That all.. so frustrating living w many ppl. When I feel like this I always find a reason to forget the regret... it like running away from it. I a coward, I am an I am a jerk I stupid usless ing ting living being... if only I listen to my head instead my heart .. Aff give me a comfort fanfic give me comfort and my idol give me comfort..this is the only place I can be myself, distract myself from the harsh reality. . So I really wish this site stay forever active.. bcux it help in a way that no one can understand it. ahhh if I only I can die or live away alone without a care in the world, hmmmmm.....