Reviewer: 2pmvietguh
Site: http://2pmvietguh.blogspot.com/
Requester:tikina234
Fanfic: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/9705/14-days-to-find-love-comedy-mblaq-shinee-snsd-taeyang-yesung

Title: 5/5

As a reader, this would have likely gotten my attention.

I thought that this would have been a variety show style kind of thing, where idols find their love and what not.

Appearance: 0/10

There weren't any posters, so I couldn't judge/review it. I always just straight out give a zero (for all stories) if there aren't any posters.

I recommend you request either at Jnsterosity or Artsy Asian Crew for amazing graphic posters~

Forewords: 8/10

You had a pretty short foreword for your story, yet, readers will be able to get the gist of how the story will come along.

Plot: 17/20

Since the story is still ongoing, I will just state bits and pieces of what I've read so far:

There are people who will be going on the high school camp. At the camp, they meet Taeyang, the camp's counselor. He will be leading them with their camp activities for the next two weeks. Mir starts to fall for Tiffany, and vice versa.-Tiffany and her friends hate Jessica- Mir comes into Tiffany's tent, asked her about G.O., what is wrong with him, that he didn't seem to be himself, etc. Tiffany spills everything to Mir, about what kind of person Jessica really was and how G.O. likes Jessica, and still likes her even after all of the things that she has done to him.- Two years ago, Jessica was friends with Tiffany and her friends. Then one day, she completely avoided them. Didn't return their calls, she wouldn't sit with them at lunch, etc. At the time, Tiffany had a crush on Jonghyun. But then, one day, she saw Jonghyun and Jessica kissing. The two soon went out with each other, and about a month later or so, they broke up.- G.O. had a crush on Jessica. And so he saw an opportunity when Jessica broke up with Jonghyun. He asked her out, and she agreed. But Jessica only took him as the rebound guy. Then she asked him to go out on a second date; which happened to be on Tiffany's birthday..Jessica played with G.O.'s heart, yet he still loves her. On the other hand, Minho and Kim used to be a couple, until she lost her memory. Minho left her right after the accident, loss of memory event occurred. Minho has something to do with Kim's accident.- Later on in the story, Mir confesses to Tiffany that he likes her.

(A/N-To be honest, at first I was confused, because there were quite a lot of characters. But, as the story progressed, I've gotten used to it. I have taken the most interest with Taemin and Kim's love line, well future love line.)


Originality: 17.5/20

So, I've been criticized with this section before. I have to state this: Originality is based on me, the reviewer. Just because you (as in readers) have read a fan fic or whatever that's similar to this, it doesn't mean that I have. So, this is my opinion, my views, so yeah. . Just had to get that out of the way.

Cliches-

There really weren't that many cliches, except. .

-The characters falling in love with each other pretty much at first sight.

-Jessica and Yuri's character


Grammar/Spelling/Vocabulary/Punctuation: 12.5/15

The words that are in parenthesis or are bolded are the ones that have been fixed; the correct form.

If it was anyone else that had done that to me, I’d’ve (I would've) slapped them already.

His arms were not as built as Taeyang's, but there was still definatlely (definitely) muscle there.

At times you forget to capitalize the "I's". . and you're supposed to do that. (Many times, I mean)

I wanted to hug him, to tell him it's okay and everything’s gonna be alright…only I couldn’t.

Flow: 2.5/5

I think you should let the story take its course. The story seems to go by too fast. It's only been two or three days, and Mir and Tiffany are too touchy feely. I mean, not trying to be old fashioned or whatever, but they should have some sort of space. It feels like they are too close for one who's just met each other not that long ago.

The pace of the story is a bit fast. If the pace slowed down a bit, this would've been a perfect story.

Writing Style: 10/10

I like how you describe the character's physical appearance. . .I like how you reference some of your phrases with kpop songs. (Heh, I love the author's notes. lols) I really really love you guys' writing style. 

Other++ 5/5

MBLAQ and Shinee <3

Subscribed. Can't wait for the next chapter! ^-^

Total: 77.5/100