It's 1:50 am here and I have been crying ceaselessly by myself for the past hour. My sister, whom I share a room with and is three feet away from me has absolutely no idea of my predicament.

So my lawyer-professor humiliated me in front of the class and accused me falsely a while ago. I've never felt so humiliated and small and stupid in my life and ended up looking so vulnerable and defenseless by crying afterwards. 

I have been feeling depressed since I graduated high school, but nothing too serious. It was just all about feeling uncertainties and insecurities about myself and how I don't know which course to take up in college since I pretty much do not excel at anything. But then something happenned a while ago and all these pent up frustration that I have been trying to suppress at the back of my mind suddenly came rushing back to me. 

I have one thing in my mind right now. "What the hell am I doing with my life, taking up a course that I'm not even sure I wanted." 

What am I going to do with my life? I honestly don't know, I am way beyond the crossroads of my life and I obviously chose the wrong path.

My eyes are seriously puffy and red now and I can't sleep. 

Seriously, what do I do with my life?

I just feel so worthless and sad. I can't. I just can't.