I'm Tiffany, or you can call me Alex, just choose whichever you want as long as you don't call me brownies. The names seem to contradict themselves, but I'm a female. I will be 19 years old this April 28, so I guess I'm quite old compared to other people here in AFF.

Reading is one of my biggest interest. Finding a story that has amazing plot would give me chills and I love that kind of feeling. I like it when the story has a good storyline, the one which would give me aftereffects, and make me step back and think for a long time after reading it.

I've been writing stories for three years, but I'm still not good enough, though. My AFF account crashed last month so my stories were all wiped out. I'm thinking to post it again after I re-write them, because some of them were written when I was first came here so the language and the plot were still terrible.

For reviewing, I've worked in some review shops and I even owned a review shop before my account was having the problem. I can't say that I'm a strict person, and harsh words are not likely one of my forte. I will be very honest though and I will make sure that I'm not going to hold back everything that needed to be said about the story, especially when it comes to the plot and characters. I like your concept of 'mark-less' reviewing. I think that gives more room for the review to have more advices and comments, rather than just a collection of grading scores in numbers.

 

I have a lot of favorite stories but sadly I don't have the habit to save the link or remember its name. Oh well. But I do remember their plot. These are the ones that I like the most:

1. Interrobang by chaos-

It is one of the most beautiful Kaisoo stories that I've read. The title is unique and it relates a lot with the storyline. I like the author's story idea and even though the whole plot seems a bit common (about the main character's having a fatal disease) but she wrote it effortlessly and managed to not make it a cliche-sad story. The characters were nicely portrayed. I really enjoyed how she gave them each a distinctive personality and such witty dialogues. 

2. Rediscovering Us by OppaOppaOppa

Despite the author's name which made me cringe a little, her story was well written if not perfect. She used the time setting where Super Junior was already retiring as an idol group, which is quite uncommon in AFF. She kept her story realistic and portrayed the emotion of the characters nicely. Her choice to make Eunhae's relationship complicated and then solved it in slow pace were praiseworthy. I admired her patience in writing this long story.  

3. In-Sane by smileyfaced-demon72

It is is about a mental hospital with Super Junior as the patients and doctors. The atmosphere in this story is dark and complicated. The author divided the plot according to the pairings and gave different ending for each while also holding all of them in one piece. She kept the plot real and the ending was really satisfying for me; she did not hesitate to give a sad end where it needed. I like how the she wrote the emotion for each character and how they tried to overcome their mental illness. It is a great story. 

 

My favorite genre is an effortlessly written angst, or maybe I could have said it better as light angst. It is light because I can't stand to read something around physical or ual abuse theme with explicit description. I like sad and complicated stories, because they tend to have a really good plot and aftereffects for me after the ending. Another genre that I like to read is a well written romance-comedy. I'm not the best writer for witty and funny dialogues, so I always admired the authors who could produce good romance-comedy stories. Some examples for that are Office Antics by Areumdaun and Question EXO! by DAMNCHINESE.

 

As I mentioned before, my account was crashed last month so I don't have many stories on my hands right now as I'm still in the process of re-writing them. I only have one story left here in AFF. It is called Memoir which featured Taoris. 

Here is the link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/425963/memoir-exo-tao-kris-taoris

If you need to see my other stories that I could give you a peek for one or two chapters which I've finished writing but not yet posted on AFF. 

 

Personally, I prefer more than het, and I don't usually work with OC. I can't bring myself to read nor write yuri though. My favorite pairs are too many, but these are the ones I favor the most:

Eunhae, Kyuteuk, Kaisoo, Baekyeol, Taoris.

As for the groups, I found myself listening to B.A.P the most nowadays. I also like Infinte, EXO-K, Super Junior, Beast and Secret. 

 

I don't have any particular pairs or groups that I'm not willing to review. But I would appreciate it if it's the group that I'm familiar with. Like I said before, I prefer more than het but it doesn't mean I won't review the stories with het pairings. For the genre, I can't review stories with full (PWP) and the one with explicit description of abuse and gore. 

 

I'm online on AFF almost everyday, but most of them are just for reading, which don't take much time. But I can online anytime I want on weekends, depending on how much homework or campus projects that I have at hands. 

 

Here is the review for your story. I picked More Than Enough.

 

Title

I like the title. It is not decorated with grand words; it is simply honest and stay true to the plot. I noticed that it is actually the quote from the final and only dialogue in the story, which makes it better because I think it is the main part of the whole story. I cannot think of a better title, so yours is perfect. 

 

Foreword and Description

It always pleased me when I see that the author used the foreword and description correctly. Short description is my favorite, because I think it encourages the reader more to get curious about the plot. It makes them eager to read more because of the 'mystery' kind of vibe from the description. It is hard to pull off a great short description, because if it's too short then the readers might not get the 'charm' of the story enough for them to stay. However, if it's too long then the readers might lost their curiosity or immediately judged the plot as either good or bad because the author revealed too much. I think your description is fine, but I'm not sure if it is enough to capture readers interest. Maybe you could be more specific in mentioning Kyungsoo's problem, which I found out to be quite ambiguous in the story. Personally, I like how you use the term 'finish line' as the analogy for Kyungsoo's problem. 

The foreword is also short, which is good, considering that it is an author's note.  

 

Visual Appearance

Your writing is clean, the lines and paragraphs are neatly organized, and the font size is readable. I have no complain for this part.

 

Plot/Storyline

Assuming that you wrote this based on your experience, I will not argue with its believability. However, with the descriptions and background of the main conflict given in the story, I still think that Kyungsoo somehow took it too far by deciding to jump from the window to end his misery before he was stopped by Jongin. I got your points of the conflict that Kyungsoo was having; he was lost in his depression and ended up frustrated, but the descriptions of the cause were not really hit the point. It was getting there but it lacked something, like a of the problem itself. 

One more thing that I need to consider is, where was Jongin when Kyungsoo struggled by himself at the beginning? Assuming that Jongin already knew Kyungsoo for a long time (because he said Kyungsoo is the most caring person he knows, and he dared himself to form half a heart with his arm), he should have been with Kyungsoo when the other was having a bad time. But Jongin's late appearance is proven effective to give more dramatic effect to the story, so I guess it is okay. 

I like the ending. It was perfect and it gave me much feelings after reading it. It did not give me chills but it did make me step back and think. It must have been nice if we have friend who would stop you from doing something very stupid and lead you back on track. Your story has a good message and it is even more touching because you experienced it yourself.

I'm not sure if your story has enough captivity, because it is a one-shot and a very short one at that, so the storyline is not deep enough to get me hooked. But like I said before, your story has a good message, and everyone can relate to that so I think it is the charm of this story.

 

Characters

Well, I cannot say much about the characters here, especially for Jongin, because it is a one-shot and mainly focused on Kyungsoo. I do think that Kyungsoo's condition needs more background for it. Maybe you could explain and give more clearer hint on why did he end up like that. It is not entirely wrong because by putting the plot like that, it gave me a frustratedly curious feeling which I cannot decide whether it is a good or a bad to have. But it did make me eager to read until the end, so you can treat it as an advantage for a one-shot. 

 

Flow

I don't have any problems for the speed. It started at the right pace and ended up also in the right pace. It is pretty understandable, so I don't have any complains for this part.

 

Writing

When you said that you're picky about the grammar, I have to admit that I couldn't agree more. I spotted no flaws in your writing; it is just very clean, very neat. Every words is used effectively and the sentences even look pretty.

It is hard to comment on the style when the story is so short, but I could say that yours is fine and I like it. I noticed that you used quite a lot of repetitions, especially for the word 'he' to start the sentences. I think it is brilliant move, because the repetition created the suitable angst mood, like you were listing each of his miseries. It makes the story looks like a chronology on how Kyungsoo slowly fell into depression state.   

 

Personal enjoyment/Feels given

I probably have mentioned about these above, but let me repeat them again. I do like your story and it fits to my preferences in the genre that I like, but I cannot say that I enjoy reading it. It lacks something which I cannot really point it out, however it still gives me feels after I finished reading it, so it is not bad at all.

 

Subscribe? Y/N

I would say no for this.

 

Well, I think I've already completed the form. I apologize if it's too long for your liking, but I do hope you would consider me as one of your reviewers. Thank you in advance and I wish you luck for the new shop.