Sometimes, I don't feel real. Like I'm not here, at all. And I'm afraid that I'll vanish without anyone knowing. I'll disappear without my family or friends knowing. Then, I wonder, briefly, but the thought lingers somewhere within, I wonder if this is all just a dream. If my life now is just a dream. What if none of it is real. I wonder if I'll wake up from this dream and the whole thing will repeat? If that's possible. I don't know. I'm always confused and left abused by the monsters inside my head. Constantly, I wish I knew why and how and where and when. Often, I wish I knew the answers.