'failure

I'm such a failure as a person TT^TT I just can't trust myself... I'm insecure and think low of myself.

But that's not the point! I've been like that for the past 4 years and I learned how to live with myself. It's alright not to be pretty and forever alone or popular or, or,or...

But right now, my insecurities make me bite my nails. My English exam is right around the corner - 14th of March to be more exact, and I'm so freaking scared of it! IELTS is unlike anything I've done in school. And I can't afford a private tutor like my classmates... And I really scared. I know my English is not that good and that there's a lot I could improve and I know that the oral part will make me shake like crazy! And if I fail that last part of them exam, I fail the entire exam, no matter how good or bad I did in the other parts... so yeah... I'm screwed! TT^TT Seriously! And it's not about the 200 and something euros I paid for the exam, but about me and my future and about how I don't want to disappoint my mother who thinks the world of me! I'm afraid that she'll come to realize what a failure her daughter is...

I think there no more luck in the pockets for me....

And I feel like dying right now...............

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MoonSungRa #1
I believe that your english is really good! ^^
It's normal what you're feeling right now. It is because of all the pressure. Don't worry, after doing some research I think that the oral part is not the most difficult part of the exam. And I'm sure you'll do just fine! :D
b-itnaneun #2
You can always ask your friends for help here on AFF for the English. The oral part... man, that's me having to take it in French T^T But even though I have no clue how paining IELTS will be for the brain, I know you'll do just great!
danlyy #3
I did the IELTS last year which sounds totally ridiculous cuz English is my first language oh well. But that's not the point ^^ It's actually so much easier than i thought it'll be. The speaking wasn't that bad either :)
DarkShadow #4
I agree with B_ann1
DarkShadow #5
AISH ur fine!!!!
N ur mum will never think of u as a failure
Fighting unnie*
Just do ur best
B_ann1 #6
* (I know it's hard under...)
srsly, what's wrong with me today? I'm typing a chapter for AoF and all I'm getting is continuous typos and missing words and all that shizzz... aaauuwaaaa :/
B_ann1 #7
I think your English is really good :) And if you'll excuse me for being extremely bold, if you're just stressing about this, it's not gonna get you anywhere. Study what you can, try to relax (I lmpw it's hard under much pressure, but try), sleep well and just do your best. No one can put a blame on you if you give it your all and are unsuccessful. For what it's worth I fully believe that you'll do well. And if you've lost faith in yourself, think like this: rather fail because you're not good enough, not because you didn't try.
Hwaittiing Chingu! :D
ke_xin #8
You are not a failure!!! Outside of English, you are beautiful and funny and vivacious and feisty and true to yourself. All of those are things to be very proud of.
Back to your English, I think it's is very, very good; much better than some of the university students I have classes with who are non-native English speakers. And look at all the stories you've written in English; they're very good story wise but are also very rich in their use of language.I know it's stressful, but you'll be fine...no, more than fine, you'll be fantastic!
If you get nervous during the oral, just take a deep breath and pretend you're talking to me, arasso? Also, if there's anything I can do to help, let me know. Saranghae and hwaiting!
YuxieWuxie #9
I think you'll do just fine. I've kinda been there, I took the DELF exam - like IELTS but in French, 5 years ago and I was literally shaking in the speaking part, but I did well. I was in 7th grade and my French was pretty bad and I still made it. I think you'll do just fine, HWAITING! I believe in you.

But, why are you taking the IELTS and not the Cambridge exam?
ItsRainingkpop #10
You can do it unnie! I believe in you!
Having private tutors gave them an advantage sure, but hardwork does pays off!
Your english is not that good? That's what you think but to me its perfectly fine ^^
As for oral...just try to stay calm and if that doesn't work try to act like you are nto nervous! it really helps :)
With such a lot of things at sake, the more you shouldn't give up so soon! Study, practice and do everything you can to pass the exam. Trying your best makes a difference! :)
Don't stress yourself out too much, you won't be a failure of a daughter no matter what the results are. Your love for her and the things you do to make her proud and happy makes you the best daughter she can ever have! ^^ Yes she may feel disappointed, but you tried your best didn't you?

Everyone would feel insecure about themselves from time to time, its perfectly normal. What they don't know is that they can't see the good in themselves and instead sees the flaws. But those close to them sees their good points better than anyone else.

Don't let this exam get you down! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!
FIGHTING KAT UNNIE!!!!! *waves pomspoms*
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