I'm breaking down.

Honestly, this is the only place where I can rant right now. I can't really talk to people about this in the real world. I'm normally one of those people who keep to themselves. I'm not a open person but I just need to let this out....

I'm not trying to get sympathy or anything I just really want to let this out and hopefully get some advice.

So school is getting out of hand for me and it's only been a few weeks. I'm already being pressured for SATs, school work and college apps. I honestly have no more time for myself. I can't study for SATs because of school work and I've been having so many tests, quizzes and projects from school. I literally just want to kill myself. Everything is so pressuring and I have thought of suicide before. I've never did it because I thought I could handle everything but in reality I'm literally breaking down. I'm killing myself over right now. I can't handle anything. And I'm a complete sobbing mess right now. I ever lashed out on my sister and I feel so bad. I can't even face anyone right now. I just want everything to be over. I want to end it myself but I just can't.

Somebody...please...advice?

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persona-x #1
You have a whole life ahead of you, school is very strict and harsh because of that.
Don't just end it right here because it's too much.
You might want to talk to your teachers a bit on your load. Remember, in a few years, you're going to be out of school. If you kill yourself now, you'll lose everything.
dinosauregg96 #2
please dont think that way, dont let all this stress get to you. alot of people have gone through the same thing youre not alone on this. i myself have gotten stress to the point that i cant control myself and just cry but just take everything calm and collected. take evrything slow and dont hurt yourself at the process of it. im sure youre a strong girl, and i know youll get through all this stress. dont let it get to you.
yong89
#3
me too! we are on the same condition. i'm even think to suicide too , but.... i have more important things than school.

i remembered my parents, friends, dreams, and of course God. it's too risky :/

school is getting overhead these days. not just us, but to everyone.

fyi, i always wondered why ppl take suicide, and i know the reason now. i also remembered a lot of students decide to end their life just bcs school.

so just lit up your spirit. only for some years!!!!
xadrimusicx
#4
RELAX! Like no joke.... I'm not kidding.. I have literally been in your exact shoes right now last year! Now look at me... In college and handling stuff that is even more difficult than what you are doing... What you have to do is calm down and plan out your stuff accordingly... Make a priority list and list which is high priority and what is low and work out each thing according to that... Do something that makes you happy... Like dancing or singing or just listening to music or even going outside just to get your mind off of the stress... And don't keep it in... Talk to someone about it... And not on the Internet here... You may feel uncomfortable to do it... But you'll feel soo much more better if you actually talk and I mean TALK TO someone about it... You never know... Someone might be feeling the same way as you... :) I hope this helps...:)
camilliooon
#5
REXEE. I know I'm not good with these things and it seems like I'm not going to do this seriously but als;kdjfmd
Don't stress yourself so much. I've already went through what you're going through now almost and you know how young i am ;~;
If you can, make a playlist of just happy songs you listen to and listen to it while doing your work to calm yourself down. It works when I do it, maybe it'll help you too.
I'm having problems too but not with actual work, just normal social life problems and choir problems. I'm honestly a really depressed crying person inside but I hold it in, just like you do. I hope you know you'll get through it, only a little left until your high school life is done, right?
I JUST WANT TO GET MY LICENSE ALREADY AND DRIVE TO COMFORT YOU. ;3;
BANA_June
#6
Maybe it's just because I was a bad student but, I never stressed to do every single project, essay, and homework assignment. Sure I've done most of them but I felt that I needed a break at times, so I skipped a few.

If you're good in English class and you write well (essay wise), all you really need to focus on is the math for the SAT. And maybe ask your teacher to go over some SAT words or give a packet with some words and definitions.

It's best not to stress yourself out with all of that work. And college applications aren't really that stressful unless you have to write and essay to go with it. Even then it's not that hard. Your guidance counselor and college advisors in your school should be a big help with the application process.

........
Maybe I'm not giving you the best advice when I say to skip some of the projects/essays/homework, but truthfully if you have an awesome and secure grade in that class, and you're favored by that teacher, you shouldn't worry about it as much. If you know for a fact that your graduating and you have everything you need, then you shouldn't overly stress yourself.
kpopfreakILOVEYOU
#7
Chingu, it's alright. Ive had experience with this and I'm only in the 7th grade.
Everything's going to be okay afterwards but DO NOT commit suicide, okay?
I wish I could be there to help you. (Okay, what I'm about to say might sound a little cheesy, but it's true.)
There has to be a little bit of rain before a rainbow. ^^ Hwaiting!!! Don't give up~~~
Friday #8
Sweety, it's ok, dont worry. Sometimes you just need to get things off your chest, and thats ok, it will only help you if you do that because you will start concidering your problems on a different poit of view. But please trust me when I say that suicidal actions are not the sollution. There is so much more to live for especially after school, when you can start over again and do something you truly want to do! So those kinds of stuff are really no good. I know how hard school can be, and dealing with your surroundings at the same time. I know its a lot, but just think about the things you can accomplish when all of that is behind you! I know its a very busy time, but it is also important to take care of yourself, because if you are not comfertable and your mind is a mess it will reflect on things such as hectic times with school work and such. So its very important to take some time for yourself too to relax. Even if it only is half an hour a day. Just take a nice long bath or shower, watch a serie you like or a nice magazine. And take your time to boost yourself in a positive way! I swear, it helps so much already, when your in a more calm place your mind will be more at ease. Also, maybe you should explain to your sister that youve been under a lot of stress lately, im sure she will understand.

Just know, that there are more than enough things to live for. And im serious try to take time for yourself to calm down some, it might sound a little shallow or lame but really, it helped me a lot too. And if you are really worried, maybe you can go see someone, a confidential person maybe. Its not a shame to ask for help ok? It shows that you are strong enough to open up and face your problems.

Also, you can only do as much as you can, and thats ok, because the way you said it, you work really hard for it. And thats the most important. Hard working people will get somewhere in life!

I hope this will help you a little, and you can always message me! Take care! Xx
ForeverFive #9
I'm not sure if this will help though*
ForeverFive #10
I'm not sure if i can help you. But you're just like me. A type of people who won't open up to others. And i'm pretty sure you're older than me.

Take a deep breath dear. Life is totally unfair, and only some knew how it feels to be in your position. How about you try and organize yourself and make some time of yourself. Don't feel pressure about your works. You need to relax too. In between of your works, take a half of an hour or an hour to chill. Don't let the work be a burden to you. Please don't ever do something stupid or doing the suicide stuff. I beg you please don't do it. I may not know you, but please don't ever and ever make a something that will regret you. Life is not always easy, sometimes it's a challenge.
Breathe in. Breathe out. Let it be.

I'm not this will help though, but goodluck in everything. Don't give up.
Okurah
#11
Awe hun, don't think like this! I may not know you well, but please don't do anything jurassic like suicide! Please, understand that, that is never the right way to go, it may feel like it is at times, but it isn't. I'm quite shocked at how alike your situation is to mines just a few days ago. I felt the pressures of college, SATs, and homework. I even had a mental breakdown and contemplated suicide. I didn't want to talk about it with anyone either because I'm supposedly the "strong" one in my group of friends. So, like you I turned to my internet friends and sure enough someone told me something that calmed me down. It may not help you, BUT I'm hoping it does. Don't let the pressure of being a senior (which I'm guessing you are) get to you. It suppose to be fun! Yes, there are a lot of things that need to be done, but don't kill yourself trying to get them done. Just do everything to the best of your abilities, no one is expecting anymore than that. As long as you try your best it will be good enough. Maybe take a day or two of to calm yourself down. It worked for me! You just need to make some time for your brain to relax and be stress free. If you need anyone to talk to, the internet is the best place ^^. Don't worry so much about messing up. Everyone does it! And believe it or not there IS room for mistakes. We are only human, don't take it out on yourself so much. I hope I've helped. Talk to me or anyone below and above this comment! I'm sure we'll all be willing to listen.
b2stie #12
Hey buddy hang on. Imma bout to tell you the road where you think is best for you probably would lead you to. I feel you. I know you're pressured, I know you're scared of being a failure, I know you're lost, and I know you feel alone. But it's all your choice where you end at. I'm a senior right now haha and I can't even join sports or clubs my last year to make my senior portfolio to look good for scholarships. I know you're probably thinking why this involves you but wait. During my junior year I became a mess. Like you said you were a person to hold in things, you probably don't wanna let anyone know cause they'd probably not take you seriously or say something to offend you since you're sensitive to that feeling at the time. I failed junior year. Everyone said it was because I'm lazy, that's partially true but what they don't know is how I feel. How I would get so mad at myself like I can't do anythin right. Like how I don't deserve to live, while others don't deserve to die. But I'm letting you know time is precious. Don't let a temporarily feeling choose your life for you. Don't feel like you're alone. Cause trust me, you're not. And if you feel stress, if you don't rant about it in reality go ahead. Rant about it in cyberspace. For your identity is unknown. I mean the choice is yours, the responsibility is yours, if you let a temporary feeling decide for you, you might regret it in the future. Cause I felt like dying and depression was worth my valuable time at the moment. But how wrong was I. And this year life ain't going easy on me. All I'm trying to say is of you dont want to talk about it, go to google and find some inspiring quotes or stories or whatever. Don't think about suiciding and end your time cause trust me, your time of the end of your life will come for you, when your done being blessed with the time of life. I probably aint the best person a giving advice but I'm still learning. Now I'm coping pretty good with life. And the choice is yours.
dyann23
#13
u live in usa ready?... well some of my friends study in class for the SAT... wel.. they first study for the toelf cuz we are from panama xD then they pass the toelf the next step is the SAT.. they just study in class... mmmm... just take 15 or 20 mins realax ur body and brain... and then study or to ur proyect.. just relax.. senior life is not too easy.. i even cry because of proyect, speeches, homeworks... exams.. just relax a bit.. take it easy.... i´m really srry if my advice dont work.. but.. life is not easy... well... i just can wish u luck...
btw.. srrie for my bad grammar.. xD
Lumiere01 #14
Hang in there! I'm a Senior myself so I sorta of know what you're going through. It might be hard now, but once the college app period is over it should be a little easier cause it's one less thing to worry about. Are you like taking a lot of AP or hard classes?
winterflowr #15
Oh no! I'm sorry things are really hard right now--I'm going through the same thing T_T But perhaps not to your extent.

I don't know how long you've been in school for, but maybe this would be a good time for you to just refocus and decide what is more important. Reorganize your time and make a ordered list of what to do. You should like of giving up some of your time for a few weeks just to get back into the groove of things. I think that you should focus on schoolwork first--then, when you've gotten a hold of things, then study for SATs in addition. Ignore what others tell you to do--focus on what you think is most important!

If you need anyone to talk to, you can ALWAYS PM me! I can't guarantee that I will respond right away, but I will definitely reply in the next 24 hours!