My feelings... I guess?

 

Okay, this is really random and I haven't really made a blog about how I'm feeling and stuff so yeah this is going to be a mess.

I'm like in this constant spiral of sadness even when I'm laughing it feels fake you know... like as if I'm not happy anymore. I could sense my smile being awkward in the photos I take.

SHINee's back. I've been waiting for them for so long but now that they're back I'm just not excited... I feel nothing. Now, don't take me wrong I still love them in fact, seeing them being happy and together really made me happy for a moment. But not like before. I'm not hyped up like I usually am. 

I don't even feel like doing anything that I'm interested in like watching k dramas, listening to songs, eating my favorite food. I'm just not motivated to do it anymore. 

Writing is the only thing I can get myself to do because I'm just scared of feeling like a bum, ya know. But even in my stories, when my boyfriend was editing the chapter he said he didn't get the same vibe that he got in the previous chapter and that it was bland af and told me to add and remove a few things. 

I'm not even excited to even wake up anymore. Maybe it's because of the lockdown and I have nothing to do and I'm not going out but still, people have been doing so much in all these months and I'm just forgetting how to be truly happy. 

Oh well, that was long I guess, yikes.

BTW SHINEE IS BACK!!! I really can't wait for their comeback tho that would be something to get myself busy with!! 

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Yuumiii #1
Oh my God, you've penned down how I feel. Except I have no will to write too. I have no will to do anything. So instead I have started on a habit I used to have, reading. I don't know how to cheer you up but hey, sometimes we need a me time. Sure, you feel sadness and unexplainable blankness towards things you once loved but let me tell you this, it's ok to feel this way. Try something else, once you get rid of this hanging feeling, you'll get back on track. Good luck for next year and whatever is left of this one. Everything will be alright ♡
ChoiGiGi #2
This year has been pretty crap. And yes I felt that same way too. I am as well. I just gave up updating till I could really finish even a sentence. My updates are on pause. So much hugs and love to you xx We can get through this. while I was glad to see the four boys back together I havnt been in touch. I havnt even heard any Tae songs yet. I'm kinda just floating around. I bet you there are a fair ammount of us all kinda floating about in a cloud and fingers crossed next year we shall be in the sunshine.
kyanite69 #3
Ah, I understand how you're feeling. I honestly feel the same way too. I've been slowly but surely getting my motivation back but it takes a lot. I've been staying off of my phone and focusing on TV or playing the Sims. Hopefully you can find something to make you happy. I'm rooting for you.
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