NAME : Nam Judam (남주담)

BIRTHDAY & AGE : June 10, 2000 (19)

NICKNAMES:

【 CLOWN JU 】: Judam is goofy, but she's not called Clown Ju because of her personality or her outfits. She has a strong love for clowns, to the point that she brought it upon herself to be nicknamed Clown Ju.

【 GOD JUDAM 】: Jokingly made by her fans — because her looks and talents are said to cure any illness, stop wars, turn water into wine, turn rocks into bread, and make anyone happy (lol).

ETHNICITY : Korean

NATIONALITY : South Korean

BIRTHTOWN : Daegu, South Korea

HOMETOWN : Daegu, South Korea

HEIGHT & WEIGHT : 160cm & 45kg

APPEARANCE : (heejin, loona / yuju, cherry bullet) If Judam got a penny for every time she's been likened to a cat, she probably wouldn't have that much money, but she'd have a good amount. Maybe it's the cat ears she always seems to be wearing, or her sharp, oval shaped eyes with big brown irises, or her slender face that is in a V shape ending with her long chin. It could also be because of her slim nose that's similar to "a chicken's feet" in the words of her older brother, or possibly her thin lips that curl into a W shape, a defined cupid's bow helping the formation. Whatever it is, she's constantly compared to kittens and called pretty. Her face is her most prized possession, according to her mother.

STYLE : The clothes she wears are a little out there, matching her personality well. As mentioned before, she's always wearing cat ears, in whatever situation: practice, sleep-time, hanging out with friends, a date, etc. She can't go without her cat ears. All her outfits are clown inspired, which means outrageous, bright colors and weird patterns (psychadelics); patchwork based, which either means it's actual patchwork or it's patchwork pattern and not actual cloths and whatnot sewn together.

Bits and pieces of Y2K elements thrown in: glitter, silvers, fluroescent clothes, metallics, see-through accessories and jackets, her white Buffalo chunky platform sneakers that she wears almost everyday, switching off with a similar pair of chunky platform sneakers but with hearts. Low rise jeans and skirts, slip dresses, jean everything, and more from the early 2000's, as well. She might also wear clown makeup from time to time, but not after debut, despite wanting to - the stylists won't let her. There's a lot of pre-debut pictures of her in full clown gear, though. She has a lot of clothes and accessories with vegetable, fruit, and bug patterns on them.

personal style insp. kobinai, qiqi, froglady444, eatgummyworms

The stylists usually make her wear cuter, more innocent and soft outfits that still fit in to Mode's concept. And although Judam does like what she's made to wear, she wishes she could go all out. 

idol style insp. adorablenatsu, hantoring, yeri

PERSONALITY (N.)

❝ You never know what you don't know, because if you knew, you would know what you do know.❞

/ / /

*~*~*~JUdaMWoRld~*~*~*

ESFP-A, Ravenclaw, Low Empathy, Genki Girl, Cloudcuckoolander, The Ditz
Friendly, Entertaining, Buoyant, Charismatic, Imaginative, Free spirit
Childish, Neurotic, Dense, Hyperactive, Absentminded, Impulsive
 

WELCOME TO JUDAM WORLD!

Where the grass is blue, and the sky is green.

An upside down planet, not meant for the easily irritated and easily frightened. Life's a party here in Judam world, and they'll stop dancing when they're dead. Fortunately for Judam, the universe that Judam World resides in, her mind will stop racing when she's asleep. Everyday consciousness is dealing with the hypomania of her psyche, where she's a second away from jumping off the walls, only prevented by her mindfulness of the surrounding area and where she's currently at, onlookers who might see her bouncing from here to there and call her out on it. Alone in her room, she's a mess, figuratively and literally. She can't keep still in both body and mind, and it's not a surprise to the ones who've known her for long to hear her talking and laughing loudly with herself.

What conversation might she be having with herself, they ask. To that she answers with a simple shrug, maybe an "I don't know," to accompany it. Forgetful in the most basic sense; she never seems to remember much. She has been called dumb and slow because of this, but it's hard to remember simple facts like the capitols of major countries and how many planets are in our solar system when your mind is going through topics a mile a minute. She does, however, remember random fun facts she learned that day, and will repeat them just as randomly as she found them in a conversation that had nothing to do with what the fact is about. The next day... she won't remember she said that at all. She will even sometimes forget what she's talking about in the middle of her sentence and go on her way, or speak out loud and when someone questions her on it, become confused and ask what they're talking about, adamant that she hadn't said that at all despite saying it a moment ago and that she's not that gullible. 

Situations like this are horrible for everyone involved, but especially for Judam. She's sensitive to a fault, controlled by her emotions in each way she could possibly be. Due to her neuroticism, she experiences a variety of moods that end with her crying. She cries more than she can handle, to the point where she makes herself sick, but she gets over it faster than she got bothered by it, her absentmindedness again working its magic to make her forget what she was even crying about and having her distracted by something else completely.

And, boy, does she get easily distracted. It's even worse that she's so impulsive; the moment she sees anything worth gravitating her attention to, it's a wrap for whatever else she was doing or whoever she was speaking to and she's running off to go pay attention to whatever she saw or heard (or in rare moments, smelled) for five minutes, possibly less, possibly more. Sometimes, she doesn't even need to see, hear, or smell anything to switch directions, getting bored of what she's doing or who she's speaking to to move on to something else. Extremely fickle, she has a hard time sticking through to the end with anything because she always wants to do another activity. She'll pick up hobbies and immediately drop them without a second thought. She'll pick up items and immediately drop them without a second thought, which has caused her to break a few of her and other people's stuff. She'll go "Ehe!" while knocking a fist against her tilted head, sticking a tongue out, and winking one eye like she's some anime girl whenever she does that.

Her spontaneity and inattention are some reasons why she can't really be serious, other than the fact that she's just completely childish. The youngest of her wealthy family, she's never had to worry too much about anything: sheltered, spoiled, and coddled to the max by not just her parents, but her siblings and other family as well, which is why she is so immature and acts like a child — she doesn't have to be mature or pensive or practical because someone else will be that way for her. Any time it's time to get to work or solemn, she zones out, thinking about whatever comes to mind, or accidentally causes a ruckus by doing something loud, like playing a game on her phone or eating. Not hardworking at all and does the bare minimum because working and studying is not fun to her.

Same with people's emotions; it's not fun to sit there and watch people cry or get mad, not due to her becoming upset but because she gets uncomfortable. It's not even fun when people are talking about why they're happy, she doesn't care and she has a hard time trying to care. Bad at comforting and bad at realizing when someone's in their moods, pushing and pushing her peppiness until she gets annoying and they snap at her, then she's the one in her mood, confused as to why they yelled at her or why they're upset when they yelled at her. She also has a hard time feeling guilty for things she's done, usually shrugging and being confused some more on why she has to apologize for something she doesn't think is that big of a deal.

Judam World's habitat isn't all bad, and the good outweighs the bad majority of the time. Only those that are close to her, have known her for a long time, are sharp-eyed, or are immune to her peppiness will be subject to her flaws, and even then, her cheerful and carefree attitude has them charmed enough to either ignore it, not see it as too much of a problem, or be attracted to those flaws.  

Judam is the right amount of loud, just enough that people notice her and just enough that they won't be annoyed. She's a lot calmer when people are around, but she's still similar to an excited puppy. Very bubbly and always ready to have fun, even with complete strangers. Always willing to walk up to someone and start a conversation. She doesn't talk ears off, willing to listen for a few minutes until something more interesting occupies her mind, but she is a rapid fire speaker. No one really understands what she's talking about, but the way she says her words and all of her expressive mannerisms have people endeared and interested. When it's all over, they'll say, "Woah, I have no idea what you even told me," but will still be laughing it up with her. She's most likely not saying anything that makes sense, anyway, and she probably doesn't even know what she said herself, spitting out words that sound right. She speaks total nonsense at times, just because she feels like she should keep speaking or her brain's all jumbled up at the moment. She speaks like her sentence was ran through different languages on Google Translate and then back to the original language.

Weird, but in a "good" way (or at least she thinks so). She does have a lot of shame in regards to her doing or saying weird things, which is why she won't go full on jumping around like a pig on sugar with other people nearby, but it doesn't stop her from doing or saying things she'll get looks for because she's still very impulsive and if she doesn't quickly think "No, don't do that," the moment the suggestion pops up in her head, she'll have already done it. Staring at walls and turning her head slowly when someone calls her, poking her gums with a toothpick until she bleeds b/c she likes the taste of her blood, hiding fake blood capsules in and acting as if she's bleeding to scare the sh* out of some random, unsuspecting person, DIY projects that involve dead bugs or actual fruit that is definitely rotting, and arguing quietly with herself are just some of the many wonderful things she does because she wants to. Weirdly enough, a lot of people find that endearing, and will say, “Oh, Judam’s being her crazy self again.” with a smile on their face. It works really well for her in variety shows, and she gets good laughs whenever she’s being strange. Although, she does wonder if people are laughing with her or at her often.

Judam tries to be as unconventional as she can be, not because she has something to prove but because she just wants to have fun and the only way to do that is to be noncomformist, in her eyes. She's willing to try everything one, whether it be food, an activity, or one of her crazy ideas. Always has her head in the clouds, imagining up schemes and plans that she'll never be able to do in real life or random scenarios that will never happen in real life. Fantastical and she knows it; most of the time, what she's saying is nonsense, but other times it's the solution to a tough problem. She's an idiot that has her genius moments, basically the trope Crazy Enough To Work. She finds it hard to care about people’s feelings, but she is helpful with things not related to advice or a solution to a problem. If it’s a clear-cut direction, like “We need help carrying boxes,” she will literally drop everything and do that, then wonder why her phone is broken on the floor. She can help out with anything that’s direct and explained clearly, and won’t complain about it, unless it’s physically taxing and even then, she’ll only complain a little, mostly to be funny and cute. She’ll help out anybody, whether it be a friend or foe, which she does not have (or she does and doesn’t know that).

Friendly and willing to talk to anyone. Immediately starts talking when she enters a room, and most of the time, she won’t shut up if she can’t help it - and she can not help it. It’s a little harder for people who are more introverted to become her friend due to her being so bubbly, but it’s also very much so appreciated because she can talk to anyone for a long periods of time (if there are no distractions), even if they’re the most boring person in the world. She always has something to say and more. She might just like hearing herself talk, but she does let the other person speak whenever she forgets what she’s trying to say or she’s done with her long, drawn-out point. She’s also prone to just giving out her money like it’s nothing. To her, it really is nothing, because her family has so much. She doesn’t need to save, so she has no qualms about giving away a lot to friends and random people. She gives out a lot of personal (in person) donations, and doesn’t think too much about it.

Although she does have a good amount of friends, she goes her own way and won't settle for anyone. If they can't hang with what she does or is doing, then that's fine and they can stop being her friend; she won't mind. Despite being spoiled and attended to so much as a child (and even now), she's independent socially and always has been. Most people follow her rather than the other way around, and she doesn't usually seek people out, okay with being by herself for long periods of time, but she never is because there's always someone coming to talk to her. She has a certain natural charm to her that is irresistable. She's free spirited and seems like she doesn't worry too much about life, which attracts people to her.

It may seem scary at times, but Judam World is all abut making friends, spreading smiles, being yourself, and having the time of your life.

JOIN IN ON THE FUN!

/ / /

TRIVIA :

【 X 】: She bids on randm items she finds on the internet to collect them in her "Judam Box of Wonders." So far she has: old Japanese deco flip phones, Anime figurines, a magazine from the 70's, bug alcohol lollipops, a Baby Alive doll from the 80's, old PC games, a pager, a signed vinyl of Sobangcha's Top Secret album, and a Spongebob Squarepants episode VHS.

【 X 】: Messy eater, messy liver. She says she has hand tremors, which she does, as a reason why she's always spilling her food down her shirt, but it doesn't explain away all the clutter and mess she makes outside of eating. It's a good thing she knows how to clean up after herself.

【 ✕ 】: Tone deaf and half deaf in her left ear.

【 ✕ 】: She has a good chunk of anti fans, but she also has a lot of devoted akgaes who will go to the ends of the Earth to defend her lack of talent.

【 ✕ 】: If she was a cartoon character, she'd be Pocoyo.

【 ✕ 】: Her username in MapleStory is 공주피에로, which is Princess Pierrot.

【 ✕ 】: Often daydreaming, even in the middle of performances. A romantic and lover of shoujo comics, so most of her daydreams consist of cliche romance storylines involving her and her "Flavor of the Week", a phrase coined by Sowon because she's always changing who she's "in love" with in a week.

【 ✕ 】: If she wasn't in Mode, she'd be a NEET (Not in Education, Employment, or Training).

【 ✕ 】: Plays a load of other games, not just MapleStory. Her most played genre is Survival Horror.

【 ✕ 】: She doesn't think she'd survive the inevitable zombie apocalypse because she'd want to be nice to them.

【 ✕ 】: Believes she was a vampire cat in her past life.

【 ✕ 】: Her favorite artists are Wham!, Talking Heads, Tom Tom Club, Nona Reeves, Tracy Chapman, Kate Bush, and Lene Lovich. Her favorite K-pop artists are Puretty, the short lived DSP group, and Kara, the long lived DSP group - nevermind that both groups have disbanded. Her favorite song is "The Pierrot Laughs At Us" by Kim Wansun, and her favorite album is "Violet Fragrance" by Kang Susie.

【 ✕ 】: Her ideal type is too long and convoluted to be fully mentioned, but it basically boils down to a prince on a white horse who saves her from a dragon by becoming friends with said dragon and convincing that dragon that eating her isn't the right way.

【 ✕ 】: "Oops" is her favorite English exclamation. "헐" (heol) is her favorite Korean exclamation. "Ehe!" is her favorite universal exclamation.

【 ✕ 】: She can imitate the sound of cats and dogs extremely well.

【 ✕ 】: Her voice can go really high, it just doesn't sound good. She wins easily at the dolphin game.

【 ✕ 】: She wants to learn how to bake so she can make sweets as her only food source.

【 ✕ 】: All selfies and candid pictures of her are blurry because she can't sit still. It's different for professional photos, she doesn't feel the need to zoom out of focus before the shutter goes off, but she does when it comes to pictures taken with people's personal cameras and phones.

【 ✕ 】: Wants to try her hand at rapping. How hard can it be? Can't be any harder than dancing.

【 ✕ 】: She was scouted by all the big companies in middle school. Most of them got scared after her secret bodyguards made themselves known, but one agent from SM Ent. had tried to get them to talk to her about it when they appeared.

【 ✕ 】: Judam gets love calls from variety shows a lot, but her cousin warned the company beforehand they shouldn't make Judam do anything talk-related by herself because she will ruin their image so they usually refuse the offer unless it's stated another member can join.

【 ✕ 】: She listens to the manager the least.

BACKGROUND (N.)

❝ Did you know that the moon is my enemy?❞

/ / /

Born to a family of four, two older by five years twin brothers and her parents. Her father at the time was the heir to the chairman of and CFO of the SJ Group, the largest local chaebol in Daegu, but would become the new chairman of the conglomerate when Judam is 3 years old. Her mother was a popular singer back in the 80's, before leaving that career to get married to Judam's father. Her parents were extremely happy when Judam was born, as although her older brothers are more beneficial to her father's business, they had wanted at least one girl to spoil. And, boy, did they spoil Judam.

The princess of the castle; she was, is the most important person in their home. Anything Judam wanted to do, she was allowed to do it when she wanted, how she wanted. She was in various activities as a child — ballet, choir, sewing, cooking, rock climbing, soccer, softball, etc. — but she often got bored and would move on to the next. She had visited 14 different countries by the time she was 10, her vacation time spent extravagantly and luxuriously. Judam had gotten in trouble a lot at her school because she would blow up and hurt other kids when they didn't listen to what she wanted to do, so her parents pulled her out of school and homeschooled her, hiring the best tutors they could find. Her grades were lackluster, but she did what she had to do.

Judam's natural charm wasn't always there from the beginning. She did not have friends when she did go to private school because of being ostracized due to her seemingly random outbursts, and for her first few years being schooled from home, she had no friends because she always stayed home. She grew out of having breakdowns as she grew up more, internalizing her emotions as best as she could. She stopped wanting to do activities, and spent most of her day stuck in her room on her computer. One day, at age 10, she randomly downloaded an MMORPG, MapleStory, and that started the change in her. People actually liked her there, and her "randomness" and weird personality wasn't something to be avoided, it was appreciated and adored. Her friends in MapleStory gave her pep talks, listened to her complaints, and gave her advice for how she was feeling. She became more bright and happy, no longer the gloomy girl she was for years; making friends outside of the game and wanting to go out more so she could tell her friends in the game all about it.

She grew into her face in her pre-teen years. Although she was always a pretty girl, she wasn't as commented on it until age 12. She would get scouted so much on the streets, she had to wear a mask and hat every time she went out so that she could avoid it. She was a mini celebrity in her neighborhood; boys and girls from schools nearby and far coming to her neighborhood to ask for pictures. It did get to her head a little, but it was more annoying than anything else. It calmed down after a while, the exaggerated curiosity and praise of her looks going away.

Took her final school tests in Nov 2018, then "graduated" from her homeschool quietly in Dec 2018. She moved to Seoul to live with her cousin, Rami, so she could help her out with "things". Judam did not know what those "things" she needed to help Rami out with were as Rami never explained it, but she did want to experience new scenery, so she had agreed to live with her regardless of how ominous it was.

(The "things" just ended up her being an unofficial hype man for her cousin.)

/ / /

TALENTS : 

【 vocal 】: gowon, loona (vivi, loona)

【 rap 】: yeri, red velvet

【 dance 】: yeri, red velvet (soyee, gugudan)

TRAINING YEARS : 2 - 3 months

TRAINING : Judam has never had that much of an interest in music.

Scratch that, she's never had that much of an interest in modern K-pop. Her favorite music is from the 80's, most of the songs she listens to being synthpop and new wave. She did enjoy the bubblegum pop and retro inspired songs, but other than that, she doesn't care about idols or anything like that. The only reason she had agreed to join DM Entertainment is because she was, plain and simple, bored. She had been "scouted" when she went with her cousin to the main building, hyping her up bc Rami was having problems with one of Aleis's members for months now and she had wanted to be moved to another one of the other artists in the company. One of the casting agents had come across the two of them, and after Judam was introduced, the man asked her if she could sing, dance, or rap. She said no, which Rami agreed, but he still felt like it'd be a waste to let her go, so he asked her to come back for an audition.

Her audition was... not very good, to say the least, but she had passed because "You can learn how to dance and sing, but you can't learn how to be pretty." At this time, Mode was pretty much set in stone. No more member changes, debut song being finalized, but Judam was added because she was simply too pretty to not be. It helped that she had already somewhat made a name for herself last year with her LG CF. They figured she would bring more attention the group's debut. Because she was added so late and her background in performing is did it once - never again, she had to go through special trainings alone to get her up to par with the rest of the members. She didn't start training with the actual group until a month before their debut, a month or so into her being a trainee. It wasn't hard for her to become friends with the others, though, but there is still a barrier between her and the rest. Although she's not as good as them, she keeps up. The trainers tried not to yell at her, because the first time the vocal coach did, she bawled very ear piercingly loud, whined about it to her family, and then the company got a very stern phone call from her dad, who had agreed to help with funding of the group.

/ / /

PREDEBUT EXPERIENCE :

【 LG Q7 / Q8 CF, JULY / AUGUST 2018 】: SJ Group and LG Corporation had become affliates five months prior, and with LG's new phone coming out, what better way for SJ Group to show their support for LG Corp. than for the daughter of the chairman to be in one of their commercials? Judam didn't really want to do it, but she figured it couldn't hurt and she wanted to help her father out. She had gone a bit viral for it for being the pretty daughter of a chaebol. Q7 CF

/ / /

SCANDALS :

【 MODE'S NAM JUDAM: NEPOTISM OR LUCK? 】: Due to her family's name, there was rumors she had her father add her to the group as explanation for why her talents weren't on par with the rest of the members. Half true and half false because she was added to the group before her father started help with funding for the company, but this is what everyone seems to think, regardless of DM Ent's offficial statement explaining that. 

【 SOLO ARTIST HYUNJI REPLACED BY NAM JUDAM LAST MINUTE FOR MODE 】: Based on an ex DM Entertainment's trainee's account on an anonymous blog. Both companies deny the claim, but again, this is what people choose to believe is real. Hyunji doesn't have that many fans around this time, so Judam is safe.

【 MODE'S NAM JUDAM MISSING FROM COMEBACK PERFORMANCES 】: During Feel Special promotions, when Judam is thinking of quitting. The company lets her take a break, and through an official statement says that she can not perform due to anxiety disorder. Really, she had her first outburst in years and refused to participate.

【 MODE'S NAM JUDAM LOCKED LIPS WITH PRO GAMER WISHY 】: A little bit after All Night promotions are done, the scandal breaks out. The company admits they're dating. Judam was originally supposed to be missing from Really Bad Boy promotions as punishment, but after seeing the mostly positive response from fans, they decided it wouldn't do any good. She has even less lines in that album than she usually does.

LOVE INTEREST #1 : Ji Hyunjoo 지현주, DM Ent. trainee → Jellyfish Ent. solo artist (Hyunji)

FACECLAIM : Hyunjin, Loona (Jiwon, Cherry Bullet)

BIRTHDAY & AGE : November 7, 2000 (19)

PERSONALITY : 

ISTJ-A, Emotionless Girl, Ice Queen, Iron Lady

Abrasive, Cold-hearted, Self-serving, Arrogant, Reserved, Jealous, Domineering
Practical, Reasonable, Adaptable, Meticulous, Intelligent, Witty, Frugal

BEFORE : Hyunjoo was the first trainee Judam met at the company, when Judam had sneaked a peek at the trainees practicing.

Judam remembers being deeply impressed by all of them, but more specifically, Hyunjoo. She was sharp and concise movements, someone who has perfected her craft in the eyes of Judam. She wanted to become her friend just based off of seeing her dance. Their first meeting, and all their other meetings, weren't how Judam expected them to be, with Hyunjoo immediately shutting down all of Judam's attempts at being nice, and if Judam is one thing, it's a quitter. She had given up after the her first three tries, pouting every time she would see Hyunjoo around the way. She still waved and smiled at her, but none of it was ever returned, which in turn would make Judam pout and huff.

Judam had become a bit obsessed with Hyunjoo — looking for her whenever she came to practice, going to the girls' dorms to hang out with her friends but really using it as an excuse to sneak peeks at Hyunjoo reading in her shared room, asking people as discreetly as she could (which wasn't very discreet) if they knew any random trivia about Hyunjoo. She so desperately wanted to become friends but did not want to push any of the obvious boundaries, so she didn't approach her and tried to send "friend signals," as she called it, to Hyunjoo with her mind. She was everything Judam liked in a person: mean to her, quiet, a loner, and pretty. Sowon says she has a type like that because of all the shoujo manga she reads, and Judam kind of believes it.

One day, Hyunjoo stopped showing up to the company and what Judam had thought was her trying her absolute best to avoid her would be her actually being traded in to another company, something Judam would find out only a week before her solo debut.

LOVE STORY : Hyunjoo debuts a few months after Mode, in the summer, as the solo artist Hyunji. Judam congragulates her on Mode's Twitter account, without their manager's knowing, which gets her a scolding from them. She thinks it's worth it, though, because she has no way of contacting Hyunjoo to personally congragulate her. Judam knows Hyunjoo probably wouldn't acknowledge her congrats even if she did have a way to contact her personally; she doesn't even acknowledge the tweet besides a pity retweet that her manager probably did.

Judam creates a private account to follow Hyunji fansites, pouting and whining over the fact that she can only see her in pictures rather than in person. Her obsession is restarted after Hyunjoo's debut, but instead of daydreams about having girl times and being friends, the content is a lot more romantic in nature. It doesn't become that way automatically, random scenes that Judam can plausibly deny as just gals being pals popping up a month into her having that secret account. Judam panics after a very specific daydream about how Hyunjoo's lips would feel against her own when staring at Hyunjoo pictures, deleting her account and even throwing her phone at the wall for an extra touch. Judam can - or at least tells herself she can - easily ignore it, because the idol life never rests and she always has to think about something else, putting all the nice kissing to the back of her mind.

The two reunite during Peekaboo promotions, which Judam has been dreading. She hasn't been able to get the kissing out of her mind, on replay like a broken record whenever she's about to pass out. It's been months, but it won't leave her mind and new scenes keep being created almost every day. At this point, Judam is halfway to accepting it. She IS her type, it makes sense for her to think about kissing her. They meet in the hallway, Hyunjoo leaving the restroom and Judam going to enter it. Judam can't help herself when she sees her, butterflies in her stomach and feeling giddy. Before she can tell herself to stop, she's asking Hyunjoo, "Do you want to kiss me?"

Judam doesn't register what she says, too busy staring at Hyunjoo's red tinted lips, until Hyunjoo laughs. It's a small laugh, but a laugh nonetheless, and Judam latches on  to that laugh like she's a leech blood. The smile on Hyunjoo's lips is quickly gone, replaced with a frown and red cheeks, and she's speed walking away from Judam and the restrooms. Judam may be stupid and slow, but she's – well, no, she's stupid and slow, and she doesn't think that maybe Hyunjoo was embarrassed until Sowon says it. She thinks bad embarrassed for a bit, thinking that she had made Hyunjoo uncomfortable for whatever reason and whining over it, but Sowon assures her it was probably a good thing.

This is what kicks off phase 2 of becoming Hyunjoo's friend (possibly girlfriend?): Judam openly flirting with Hyunjoo every chance she gets. Fortunately, Judam and Hyunji promotion time is around the same, so Judam had a lot of opportunities near the end of 2019 to flirt it up with Hyunjoo. Surprisingly, it works well; Hyunjoo either blushing or responding back in a harsh, but, in Judam's eyes, sweet way. Judam asks her manager to ask Hyunjoo's manager for her phone number on new year's day, ready to take the next step in their relationship.

For a while, Hyunjoo doesn't reply to Judam's texts. Judam thinks she's back to square one, and stops texting her, hoping that they'll promote again at the same time so that she can corner her again. When Judam has a crisis over whether or not she should continue being an idol, becoming a bit bored of it all, she does the unexpected and texts Hyunjoo about it. Hyunjoo calls her and berates her about it, which makes Judam cry, but then Hyunjoo tells her that she thinks Judam is good at what she does, even if she is lazy, a good-for-nothing, spoiled, and a brat, before hanging up. It does make Judam feel a bit better, but obviously not fully because she was mean to her (although it was kind of hot). Thanks to Hyunjoo, she decides to think over quitting some more.

Judam goes back to texting Hyunjoo again, and this time, Hyunjoo replies. But only when she feels like it. They become closer, and although Hyunjoo is still a bit mean to Judam, eventually Hyunjoo is Judam's best friend and vice versa.

When Judam's dating scandal with Sowon comes out, Hyunjoo avoids her for a bit. Judam is extremely confused, texting her a whole bunch of random things to get her to notice her. Hyunjoo never replies, so Judam goes over to her house to ask what's going on. Hyunjoo calls her irresponsible among other things, but accidentally lets slip she likes Judam. Judam goes into a state of shock, giving Hyunjoo the chance to push her out of her house. Judam goes back to the dorm, completely out of it for a few days.

Two weeks after, she breaks up with Sowon. Hyunjoo is not speaking to Judam, but Judam is too confused about her feelings to really do anything about that. After Sowon confronts her about her ignoring him and she confesses that she still likes Hyunjoo, Judam is left by Sowon as well, with both of them not speaking to her and her not sure about her feelings for either of them.

ENDING : up to you.

LOVE INTEREST #2 : Yong Sowon 용소원, pro gamer (Wishy)

FACECLAIM : Jungkook, BTS (Wooseok, Pentagon)

BIRTHDAY & AGE : October 10, 1998 (21)

PERSONALITY : 

ENFJ/P-A, Unfazed Everyman, The Heart, The Face

Reliable, Calm, Courageous, Charismatic, Loyal, Affectionate, Sociable
Idealistic, Sensitive, Possessive, Guarded, Nosy, Moralistic, Insecure

BEFORE : Sowon was Judam's first encounter that wasn't an NPC in MapleStory.

Judam had typed "This game is confusing <.<" in the chat at a hub for player shopping, still not fully getting how to play even after the tutorial in the beginning. Sowon, as his player 98y소원, had just finished buying an item off some random player, and asked Judam what was confusing about it. He is one of the more helpful gamers, always ready to help out a new player. "We were all beginners once," is his motto, which is why he thinks of it as a duty to help out people who are barely starting instead of telling them to "git gud." He showed her easier ways to play, which stuff to have open in the UI and what to have closed, good game settings to use, and introduced her to his friends.

Sowon was the first person Judam had opened up to, had shown her more ridiculous side to. He hadn't really reacted much when she started being more open, calling her cute and moving on. He didn't give her too much advice, because he is only two years older than her and never had to deal with what she did, but he was very good support. He checked up on her the most, logging in when he knew he had to study to talk to her.

Sowon is Judam's best friend.

LOVE STORY : Sowon doesn't want to keep it that way.

He knows where he lies in Judam's heart. Even if he tries to change that, starts acting like what Judam wants, he knows, or tells himself, it'll still stay the same. There's no point in changing who you are so someone will like you, anyway, and Judam wouldn't like it if he did that, either. He'll keep being the supportive best friend, even if his heart aches every time he has to hear her talk about Hyunjoo or whoever else she has a crush on. The others tell him to confess, but he knows (or says he knows) that Judam doesn't think about him that way and nothing much will happen, so in his mind, there's no point in confessing. He likes being friends with Judam, though, and although it hurts to hear her go on and on about her crushes now, he'll get over it.

But he never really does.

It gets easier to hear her talk about Hyunjoo, as time goes on, but he never gets over his crush. He decides to break away from Judam, but only until he gets over his crush. He does this around the time Judam is thinking of quitting, which kind of spurs her on even more to quit because she thinks her being busy with her job is why her and Sowon aren't talking as much anymore. Sowon doesn't know what's happening with her, but when he accidentally sees an old news article about her missing performances, he gets worried and asks her what's up. By then, she's gotten over it thanks to Hyunjoo and (some of?) the group, and she tells him it's nothing, which makes him feel worse. He realizes he can't stay away from her and begins speaking with her regularly again.

The second coming of Sowon, he starts acting more like a boyfriend rather than a boy friend. Judam begins to fantasize about him, too, confused about this change of his yet loving every second of it. Her relationship with Hyunjoo isn't stale, but she knows (or says she knows) her and Hyunjoo will never be able to be together, so she somewhat uses Sowon as a replacement. And a good replacement he is — sweet and nice rather than being mean, pays attention to only her rather than ignoring her, compliments her rather than berates her; he's the antithesis of Hyunjoo and it's not hard for Judam to fall in love with him.

Of course, Judam still likes Hyunjoo, but Sowon is more "attainable" for her. So when Sowon tells her his feelings after a movie marathon night, Judam doesn't have to think too much before accepting him. They date secretly for a good 3 months, before Judam gets a little sloppy and lets Sowon kiss her in public. Pictures of the kiss are released by Dispatch, Judam gets in trouble with the company and goes crying about it to Sowon.

After Hyunjoo confesses to her, Judam worries about what to do. She breaks up with Sowon a little while after, and tells him it's because she doesn't want to cause any complications with her job, but it's really because she still has feelings for Hyunjoo. Sowon tries not to blame himself, but he, not knowing Judam is breaking up with him because she's confused about her feeling, feels like him kissing her in public caused them to break up. He tries to make it up to her, but she slightly ignores him, which makes him feel worse.

Sowon finds out she still likes Hyunjoo when, in true Judam fashion, confronts her about it at the dorm. Sowon's heart breaks, and when Judam becomes tongue-tied after he asks her if he was the replacement, he decides it's finally time to give up on Judam.

Which leaves Judam without Hyunjoo or Sowon, still unsure who she wants the most and if that person will even still want her.

ENDING : up to you.

NAM JUDAM (a/B/o.)

❝What do you call a man with teeth? A werewolf.❞

/ / /

COMMENTS : I didn't want to put it down bc a lot of people are (understandably) not that comfortable in their ability to write mental illness, so I tried to make it a bit noticeable without actually saying it, but I wrote this with Judam having both autism and ADHD in mind. Judam is such a problem child for the company, but they keep her around because of her dad. insp for SJ Group (Seong-jang) is the real life conglomerate SK Group.

SCENE REQUESTS : 

【1】: Judam thinking of quitting because the idol life is a lot harder than she thought it would be and she can't handle all the bad comments about her.

【2】: Judam beginning to really like performing and being an idol!

PASSWORD: every red velvet song dhdklkj ok kingdom come.... one of these nights.... really bad boy....