So, I have been in the Education Program for about two semesters now and I finally decided to tell my mom that I wasn't happy with it (honestly it felt like I was coming out to her for the second time lmao). Have you ever just felt stuck with what you wanted to do with your life? I'm known for being indecisive (with every aspect of my life-- jobs, love life, careers, where i want to live, etc) and I've changed my mind about what I want to do for a living a million times plus one now. Ever since I was little I just knew that I wanted to help someone, something, in any way that I could. I just didn't know how.

Babysitter, teachers, detective, artist, actress, vet, teacher again, babysitter again, interior designer, artist again, back to vet another three times, nurse, therapist, etc. Like I'm incapable of deciding what I want to do. When I started college I was going for AS to become a nurse, but then I realized nursing wasn't something I wanted to do. A semester in and I changed my AS to AA and went for early childhood education. However, even before I started the program I was panicking about if this was something I really wanted to do, but I kept it to myself. 

When the time came around that I had to take the GKT (General Knowledge Test, if you are becoming a teacher or interested then you already know what that is, but basically it's a test you need to pass just to get into the program-- and it's ing expensive lol) I had to take it twice. The second time I took it was in October and by the time I would receive my results the new term would begin, so I kinda had to get in or else I'd have to wait a year for the next term. And I should have known that I shouldn't have wasted my financial aid to pursue the program because I was lowkey hoping I wouldn't pass the GKT and make it into the program-- I wanted a year off to think about things. Of course I passed the GKT and for the first time I was actually pissed about passing an exam.

So of course I have to start the program and recently just came to terms that teaching isn't something that I picture myself doing in the future. I don't want to be in a school system again, I don't like how the education system in America is, and I overall just--- the job idk. So I'm in the process of changing my major AGAINNNNNNNNNN, as I'm actually pursing veterinarian school and

let me tell you this kids,

If you're unsure of what you want to do, don't force yourself into something. Trust me, take the year off if you need it. All you're going to do is waste your time and money and stress yourself out by thinking of a future that you aren't happy with. As my parents have always told me, you should pick a job that you love so much that it won't even feel like a job. Something that you'll be excited for every morning.

If you don't feel that way about the job you're currently going for, maybe you're going for the wrong thing.

ew enough of grandpa byunny jesus christ no one asked for this advice lmao anyway, have a good day!! i'm going to cry a river out of actual stress now lol