I feel like I'm lost

I really need help. I don't have anybody to talk that's why I'm writing it in here. If you want to read go ahead;

I don't want to live anymore. It's just hurt so much. When I go to sleep I wish I can't open my eyes next morning but when I woke up in the morning  I curse to myself for not dying. There was things I enjoyed but not anymore. I don't feel anything now. I don't smile like I used to. I hate everything especially myself. I'm thinking everyday;"Why am I still alive? Why someone like me still breathing? I'm ugly, untalented, lonely...why did even god make me?"

And you know everybody has dreams so do I. But at some point it's seems not possible. My dreams was the only thing make me love the living but now they're fading. I feel like I'm loosing them but if they're gone I'll be like everyone else. I don't want it. Look at the street. There's a lot of people telling that they're living while all they did was just breathing.

I don't know what to do...I feel like I'm in a maze without an exit. I want to get out of it but I can't. I can't breath, it's so painful...I just want to die and probably I gonna kill myself before I turn 20. Please I need help...please I beg you!

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einsara
#1
please don't give up on your life...there's are so many people who loves you just the way you are...just think of people who loves you and try to work hard to achieve your dream...I really hope you are doing well now...take care!
olio_beesz
#2
Oh don't do that baby! I know how u feel cause I ever feel the same as u did. I keep blaming myself on how imperfect I am, how the closest and dearest one keep going away and leaving me hanging alone was already enough to questioned myself that 'why I should live?'. Out of many people, why it must be me? Sometime I wish that I am not human, I want to be like other non living thing cause they didn't even have to feel or bear any pain. It was kinda frustrating. But then I read this one line that made me realize how there are actlly some people care about u. It sounds like this:

"If I was there to see the sunrise, I'll be there to see the sunset."

That's mean that I'll be here, next to you, holding your hands, washing all tear that stained on ur face. U have my back and all other people do. Shoulder and ears were all for you. Don't say that u r not talented. U are one of the good author out there.

Smile =)
My_Type #3
I don't think I can say it any better than what sleepingprince said. But I am here to listen to you, even if we may never meet each other, I am here.
sleepingprince
#4
You are not ugly . You are special and beautiful the way you are. Remember that God never make mistake. You are a gift . In life there will always be unending obstacles but that dosent mean that you should give up. I believe that everyone here are born with a purposed . You just need some time to explore , experience many different things to eventually know your talent. Give yourself some time and space to grow . In life we cant always get what we want , dream dosent always come true but you can always do or achieved something thats almost close to it. Just because you havent found your purposed in life dosent mean that you should give up on life. You can always learn to upgrade yourself with knowledge to help you achieved what you want. For example if you want look good , all you need is some effort like exercising , pick the right outfit , and take good care of your skin. If you are lonely , try join fun activities from there you'l get the opportunity to meet new friends. Its important for you to accept and love yourself first. Always give yourself all the chances that you need. Talk to your family and friends for support . You can also turned to social support group and many other professionals like theraphist , counsellor , phychiatrist if you need . Think positive feed your mind and soul with good thing and you'l see the changes. Self confidence is just as important. You're still young you can always build a new dream its not too late. Dont give up so easily. Think of your love ones , think about their feelings when yoi are no longer around..i'm sure the pain will last forever for them. Suicide will not solve your problem. Instead it will add on more pain and regrets. Go relax and destress yourself. Then think again about everything and give yourself a chance. Most important thing is to give life a chance. Its not easy when it comes to inner battle but you need to win against yourself. Fight it dont give in to negativity. Life have so much to offer. This.world is so big and wonderful . There's so much hope and opportunity out there. So never give up.
Dark50
#5
I attempted suicide and then I went to therapy and then I moved to a new place temporary for a year where I went to the one of the best doctors in the country then I returned and went to a new school and make new friends and now im doing fine u just dont give up and making jokes helps with your mentality BTW and don't forger to take care of your health, wake up early, eat regularly go out once in a while connect with your family and friends