It's 1 am and I decided to write this so sorry about any miss spelling or unclear text.. But what I wanted to say was

1. Your support for my fanfics has been amazing and you make me smile and laugh with your comments so thank you for that ♡

And 2. Okay so the real topic here which is about my writing or more about the lack of it. A lot of stuff has been going on with my personal life. And I'm not doing so great mentally either... Somedays I get real excited and can't wait to write a new chapter or a one shot but then something just snaps in my mind and I lost 'the spark' if you can say. Writing my Xiumin fic has been a big help for me to get my thoughts out and when I write that it's kind of therapheutic for me. But now I've lost the interest to write that also... I just feel so useless and gross and dumb and I feel so alone. Everything is always somehow my fault and people don't wanna talk to me and if they do I up and push them away. Sorry. I am sorry to everyone who has to deal with me. I am sorry for my existance. I won't bother you anymore. 

I don't know when or what I'll upload next. I hope I get myself together soon... But as for now... I don't know.

♡ ~Sehunbean