So,you guys all know about my bestfriend right?This year we're almost at the third year of our friendship.....amd she's becoming ing crappy....Like...before we were all just besties and there was absolutely nothing wrong back then.She was the bestest friend anyone could ever have.....like she waited for midnight even tho we had school the next day just so she's be the first to greet me Happy Birthday,she acts like big sister and a bestfriend at the same time,and in turn I was there for her....all the damn time...even at the times where she didn't want to just because she was pissed at me or someone else.....

I was the first person to see her cry in a year and listened to her talk,I stay by her side even when she blatantly ignores me,I stayed by her side when she was with that other b*tch and ignoring me,I stayed by her side when everyone turned her back on her,I cut some connections with my other friends just because she's quite possesive(it's pure friendship,I promise.We're not Lesbi or anything...nor have anything against it)then in turn she does stuff for me and sticks up for me.Nice right?I did a lot and that's all she did for me...how nice and when a friend comes by to talk to her,she ignores me and goes all smiley for that friend then when I get a friend come up to talk to me she groans loudly and rolls her eyes.....why the is it fair if she gets mad about my friends when I don't ing exist for her when her other friends are around?!

So then....there's these other two friends....one is Allana and the other is Thea.So we met Allana in class and she was older and we thought she was cool.....then in lunch we were just playing then chased each other then accidentally ran around Allana and her friends.Allana didn't mind tho,she was actually laughing...then I made the first move to make friends with Allana and her other friends.So....now....she talks to Thea ABOUT ME behind my back and thinks I don't hear then just interacts with Thea and slightly to Allana then I don't ing exist anymore now.....Well,you're welcome that you met her ungrateful b*tch.It started just last week,Wednesday.We took a walk in the rain and everything was normal then the next day she ignores me.There were so many chances for her to talk to me but then she just looks at me,sighs then turns away whenever we were left alone.She started interacting and talking to me back in Friday after I helped her and 2 of our friends ace a quiz.Then on Saturday,we all agreed to meet up at school to go to the mall to celebrate Allana birthday then I got there very early....then Allana messages me saying that we just meet at the mall.I wanted to stay and wait for the others because their houses were far but then I thought Allana already texted them saying where to meet and I'll be waiting for nothing.When I got there Allana was still home but she called me and rushed to me,but before that....when I got there,I texted her on messenger cuz my messaging app wasn't working...then Thea got there and she was quite mad but she was still cool.Then when she got there she was all furious and ignoring me then only talking to Thea...then we went to the arcade and she started interacting with me when we were playing some game then we went to the karaoke section and looked for songs...there was kpop there so he called me and we searched....then after that we went to the games like nothing happened these past few days.Holding hands while running and doing a combination of laughing and panting.Then we watched the game and were joking around and we were normal.Then last Monday,I was absent cuz I coughed throughout Sunday night to Monday afternoon and my throat hurts so much that even just swallowing hurts.She interacted normally to me then at tutor time,she just sat down and ignored me.....then I went to school yesterday...she interacted with me but that dissapeared after lunch period then I was absent again today cuz the coughing really won't stop and there's phlegm blocking my airways and mucus blocking my nose and I can't breath.....and tomorrow,I'll just have to see what'll happen.....

I know you guyst are there for me....you always were and are still....and I sincerely love you guys for that.....and then it just that my friends that I kept for years,as well as my family....never were.They think I'm happy just because I'm smiling.....but they don't even look closely.....just to see that I'm dying inside.....and they're the one's who are killing me.

I just really miss her....I miss my bestfriend....the one whom I don't talk to in chat for quite a long time but when i do it's like we never stopped,the violent laughs we do for inside jokes which are mainly kpop related,the bestfriend who looks at me first when everytime a joke is told that has a reference to our inside jokes just to see my reaction,but now...I'm here....stuck with someone whom I don't exist for......

I don't wanna give up on our friendship.....at all....but it's just so hard.....plus,I cut ties with other friends for her.....what was she expecting me to do....

She just started talkng and interacting more about kdrama and friends that talk about that....She replaced me for more friends....yes,I also watch kdrama but not much since I don't really have as much leisure time as they do.So basically she chose fame over friendship....a friendship with someone who was there for her when no one was.....The girls she talks with....they have their own life and own friendship....it's just sad that she thinks she will be part of those and threw away her own.....

I really wanna change schools and all that.....but what about all the hard work I put on my dance class so they'd finally compliment my dance?what about those small achievements I made?what about the teachers who made me their favorite despite being one of the noisiest people in class?I was willing to give it all up.....but I'll have to talk to mom if I wanna do that....and you guys know my problem with my mom.....and my dad is under my mom so yeah....I'm having a great life=_=I hate everyone around me.everyone is so ing fake