Last night my mind was ed up, I felt bad when one of my favorite person and i thought my "friend" suddenly blocked me, maybe it was just me ,maybe it was just an illusion thinking that she sees me as an older sister, I cherish her a lot honestly, I even fought a friend just for her and i don't mind it thinking that she needs me or so I thought.

I've been depress for the past months ,life had been bad , first my brother got sick (a terminal case ),my mind had been a messed, then my pregnant sister deliver her youngest child but unfortunately my nephew didn't make it :( after a month my brother in law dies too,  you'll imagine how broke i am, I tried to be strong for my sister and my family, I can't cry anymore ,I felt that things are getting too much, and just when i was being back to my old self, the news of my younger brothers deteriorating health drops , on the 4th week of November he finally succumbed to sickness and die at the young age of 28, my world crumbled down, I'm felt like dying, its so painful that i don't know how to breath ,losing my brother feels like getting my hand and feet broken but a million times painful.

I got on my feet again, my parents needed me, I'm back to work and doing things that will make me forget my anxiety ,sadness and depression, reading sad and angsty stories is driving me more insane that's why whenever there's an update about thpse kinds of stories that I'm subscribe about ,I just save it offline and never read it, I was thinking of backreading when I finally got into good shape.,I just read the happy ones that will lift my spirit, it heals my broken soul, it really makes me happy, (thank u for those happy fics) but it doesn't mean that angsty fics are less I loved them equally, I'm not just in the right mood to read and react to it, my silence doesn't mean that i don't like it, I'm sorry for those authors that i offended from the lack of comments and reactions from me, I'm really sorry, I know you worked hard for your fics, thank u for sharing it w/ us, I really appreciate it, sekai fics are my life, my best diversion, when im in the brink of losing it I just read something and it calms me already..

To those authors that i offended ,sorry for the lack of response, I'll do better, for the upvotes, I'm only using a phone, my old phone that stores my email brokes  and in order to be able to upvote i need to validate my email but my memory capacity is bad and I can't possibly remember anything that's why i can't upvote in all those lovely stories, but I loved and appreciate everything from the bottom of my heart..