I really, really want to start writing again.

Yesterday, I read through one of my published fics and it made me realize that it wasn't even that bad. In fact, it was pretty bomb. And honestly, I think that comp 1 really killed my confidence to write anything. Obviously, it's totally different writing analytical papers over what success is portrayed by in a 90s movie vs. some dramatic gay fanfic, but I gradually started to hate doing both. I felt like none of the words that I put down on paper were good enough; none of my ideas were worth reading and no one wanted to hear what the I wanted to say (of course, it was my own decision to let comp 1 do that to me, but what's done is done)

Anyways,

I want to start writing again. I want to be creative again. I want to create overly dramatic teenage angst plots in my head again and watch them unfold on my computer screen.

I just need something to make me feel like me again.

And I think that I'm ready to allow myself to feel vulnerable again and to write without the fear that "oh this doesn't make a lot of sense," or "maybe I should've explained that better." that. I'm going to put my thoughts back out there for someone, anyone to read. It's almost been a year; I think it's time for me to get back on track.