It's not often I post anything about my personal life here, unless I'm doing one of those "I'm bored so I'll answer one of those quizzes" things.  But someone posted something about their personal situation a few hours ago and she was saying how things weren't so great right now, so I thought I would post this to kind of help in a way.  Chances are she won't see this because of timezones, but I hope she will.

I work for a charity in the UK, and we help a lot of people, mostly from what we call BME communities.  BME stands for "Black and Minority Ethnic", so we work with African people, East Asian people, South Asian, European, Caribbean, you name it.  We do also work with British people too, but our services target BME communities first.  We operate one centre though that works with absolutely everyone.

And my job with this charity means that I get to see the whole process, from planning the project to promoting it to seeing it delivered and sometimes delivering it myself.  I love my job.  I would gladly give up my pay to do my job.  However, the world as it is says you need money to live so whilst I would give up the pay, it would be detrimental to me to do so.  Most of my work means I work with the senior managers, and I write funding applications for big trust funds, local authorities, central governments, everywhere we can apply to.  We apply for small grants of a few thousand to large grants in the hundreds of thousands, sometimes even the millions.  (Actually, this funding bid writing helps with my story writing too.)  In quite a few, we are unsuccessful but in some we are successful.  In fact, recently we were successful in applying to our National Lottery grants team to deliver a five year project to operate this one centre that I told you about that works with everyone.  To the best of our knowledge, we are the only organisation in the city that was successful.  This funding allows us to keep the centre open for the next five years.  If we didn't have this fund, we would have to close that place and we as society can't afford that.  We have people coming to us and seeing the work we do and they see how essential it is.

The people that come to this centre are from the most deprived areas of the city and from a mix of ethnicities.  At last count, we were seeing 1000 people walk through our doors every week and we were serving people from over 50 different nationalities.  Some were British born, some had gone through the citizenship process, some were asylum seekers or refugees.  None were turned away.  They came from all sorts of backgrounds and needed all sorts of help.  Some wanted advice, some needed to learn English, some wanted to volunteer, some wanted to look for work, some were homeless, some with mental health issues like dementia or schizophrenia, some were drug users, alcoholics, gambling addicts, but all needed something from us.  None were turned down.  Some couldn't afford food for their families.  We offer a cafe where we provide a hot, fresh cooked meal for them, and we provide food bank support so they can get food for a few days.  We are supported by local supermarkets, big chain supermarkets too, who give us unsold food that we use in the cafe and in our food parcels.  Some need someone to talk to.  We have volunteers that will sit and speak to them, or they will make new friends at the centre.  Some need help looking for work.  We provide a work club once a week with qualified careers advisors who will sit with them and help them to work on a CV / resume, apply for jobs, and try to help them find work.

The stories that I've heard from people there sometimes have me crying.  One story that I remember clearest and I've shared here before, was of a woman from Libya.  In Libya, she was well off.  She never had to want for anything.  Then came the war.  Then came the fighting.  Then came the people dying in front of her and her daughter and her older son.  She cried telling me this, her daughter shut herself away in her music, avoiding everything.  Her son was not there and was apparently undergoing counseling.  Her youngest son was only a few months old and was in a pushchair next to her.  They fled the violence and came to the UK.  Often, they were not supported in their need by the government as they had been promised and had to turn to us for help.  But not once did she complain.  Instead, she looked to the future, how she wanted to get work, how she wanted to work in social care, how she wanted to provide support for other people, how she could give to those most in need, just as she was in need right now and we were supporting her.  Thinking about it now still brings tears to my eyes.  I still hear her voice as clear as anything.  Even in the darkest moments of her life, she still clung on to hope.

That's why I'm writing this.  To show you that there is still hope to cling on to.  To show you that, as clichéd as it sounds, things will get better.  Some of the users we work with left us, but they came back to tell us their stories.  One woman recently came back to update us.  When she first came to us, she was always in some kind of trouble.  She was shy, she wouldn't talk, but she was always in some kind of chaos.  Now, she's settled, she's married, she has a child and she's happier and more confident and more secure in her day to day life.  Occasionally I see the woman from Libya, but I believe she is doing well.  People in our work club go out and find work.  One of our volunteers is currently applying for University to understand more about health and nutrition so she can work as a nutritional consultant, self-employed.  (I should know, I am helping her to apply and was her reference on her application.)  Learners in our English class become volunteer classroom assistants.

Things will get better, but there is no shame in asking for help to make it easier.  You don't have to deal with it alone.  One of the big reasons I tell some people who say they have no purpose in life to volunteer is because I know how important volunteers are for us.  I see how they change their entire personality from being insecure and shy and quiet to being happy and laughing and confident and more secure in themselves.  They are proud of the work they do, even though they are not paid for it.  Things will get better, but sometimes you need help to get there.  If someone is willing to offer the help to you then take it and be grateful and appreciate it.  Give back to society when you can, just as someone gave to you.  And to everyone who doesn't need help at the moment, give something to someone who does.  Nobody can change the world, but your actions might change one person's entire life for the better, and that's just as good because you change THEIR world.

Things can always get better, and they do.  Hold on in there, and don't be afraid to ask for help.  People do listen.