jan 22, 2016 // adam kim was born on a hot spring day in santa monica, california, 20-something years ago. he is also going to stop referring to himself in third person, since i am writing this myself... 
you know, to get the facts straight because the internet is full of lies!!!1!11
anyways... yes, i was born and raised in santa monica to strict korean parents, who of course only wanted what was best for their children - but unfortunately their best interests were often overshadowed by their stern upbringing. not going to touch into that too much since this is a blog post about me - not them. heh.


growing up, i didn't have many friends. it sounds super cliché but i really was a weird kid. not even the cute and quirky kind of weird, but the straight-up-wtf type. i don't know why, but my brain was just wired differently than most kids. it was bordering creepy.
one time my dad was putting me to bed and i told him: "goodbye." 
he replied with: "no, we say goodnight. not goodbye.
and i told him: "i know, but this time it's goodbye."
he had the priest from our church come over and bless me the next day. he thought i was possessed by something but honestly, i was just being dramatic and quoting a movie i had watched with my mom the day before. whoops! never said 'goodbye' to my dad after that.

Speaking of church, the kids there thought i was odd too and mostly stayed away from me. i was generally a very curious child and had a lot of questions. i remember asking one of the kids from church (let's call him steven), whether or not he knew if it was possible to cut someone's tongue out without killing them?
steven hasn't spoken to me since.
granted, i don't attend church anymore and honestly haven't seen him since i moved from santa monica to new york. but in the 15 years that we attended the same church, he didn't say a word to me after that. i don't blame him.

moving to new york was exciting though - despite the fact that the reason for moving there wasn't as exciting. basically, my parents wanted me to become a doctor and i got accepted at med school. not something i wanted to do to tbh. i have never shown nor had any interest in pursuing a career in medicine, but my parents... they had different plans for me, obviously. and i had nothing better that i wanted to do. nothing to help me fight against their demands. and so i went to new york.
new york was everything i had expected and more. i really liked new york, but med school was...
when you start to pursue something with no motivation whatsoever it ing . since i didn't care about it at all, i was practically failing my first semester already. I seriously wondered how the hell i was going to survive this. but then i met ashley.


as most of you remember, ashley was a girl who was studying to become a doctor as well. but unlike me, she was actually motivated, she was driven, she had goals, she actually wanted this. her plans after graduation included voluntary work, joining doctors withour borders and being sent off to some country where the need was greater. she was selfless, kind, genuine and one of the bravest people i have ever met. she became my inspiration - my reason for wanting to get through med school and join her in africa or south america or wherever it was we would be sent to.
- also, she became my girlfriend and was often featured in my vidoes. heh.

unfortunately, tragedy strikes at unforeseen occurences and she passed away too soon.
again as most of you know, since i've been quite open about it in my videos, i didn't cope too well after her death. i fell into a slump, i no longer had the desire to finish med school and i started to doubt my faith in god and everything my parents had taught me about him. 
i lost my motivation, i felt like nothing made sense anymore and that everything was futile.
- except for you guys.
i realised that the only thing left that made sense and actually made me happy was you.
also, the amount of support and love that you guys showed after ashley passed was incredible and i don't think i can ever repay the amount of love you've shown. 

i then decided to quit med school and pursue youtube full-time. my parents weren't exactly thrilled about my decision, but this was what i wanted to do. for once i actually fought for something that i wanted and it felt right. also i knew that although my parents didn't back me up on this, i knew that i wasn't entirely alone. your constant support was proof of that.

skip to two years later and that's where we're at.
i've experienced a lot of amazing things, met some incredible people and haven't had one single regret. and i sincerely want to thank each and every one of you out there for staying by my side, reassuring me that being straight-up-wtf weird is alright and that y'all are even more messed up for sticking with me up until now. <3 

x