New Story(ies) !! :D [completed dont worry]

I was planning to post just 2 of them since I made 2..

But,

oh well,

I made more than 2.. in a week [proud for a while hoho]

 

So, my very first English oneshot~~~~~~~ (why English? because I made a oneshot before.. but in Malay)

A Cinderella Story

 

My very second oneshot~~~~~~~~~ (To be honest I really love this one <3)

Stop

 

My very third oneshot~~~~~!

Stranger

 

My very recent oneshot~~~~~~! (Also the fourth one of course :3)

Fake

 

please do comment if you dropped by and read them :'3 (tbh I just need some words for Stranger- well.. the one who read will (maybe..) get what I meant :'3)

okay just ignore about the commenting! xD

 

 

Back to Top ↑

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
taebi_ #1
Soooo I have read through all 4 of the stories~ Don't mind if I give some comments?

1. Don't put so much space between each paragraph. The spaces for "A Cinderella Story" is fine, but the other three makes it difficult and tiring for the readers to me (to me, at least)

2. Don't put your own thoughts into the story - for A Cinderella Story

3. Ellipses "..." is meant to be 3 dots, not 2, not 4. It is a punctuation rule

4. Your sentences are choppy.

5. "Jungkook sighs/Jungkook sighed", not Jungkook sigh.

6. Characters description at the foreword, not in a chapter

Your stories overall has a good plot that can be improved~ Sorry if I come off as harsh, I'm a pretty picky reader ><
Back to Top ↑