I swear, exam period . Everything is just so rushed and stressful.

That feeling when you know you've studied really hard for the paper, but the moment you see the actual paper, everything just disappears in your head. All the methods all just emptied from the brain.

AND

That feeling when you know that you are not prepared for the paper, and the moment you stepped into the exam room, you just feel like stopping in your tracks and cry your heart out.

There is no in between.

I know, I should be studying instead of ranting over here.

But I just can't help it. I cant concentrate well. I can't focus well. I can't do anything right.

Like no matter how hard I do things, they just don't go my way.

I'm a forgetful person.

And that made me even the more worried.

I am so scared that the moment I see the paper, or the moment I even stepped into the classroom, everything flies out of my mind.

I can't even cry, I can't even refer to my notes.

I can only stare at the paper in frustration, raking the hell out of my brains just to remember one freaking step to the working of the questions.

It doesn't help when the things I'm doing are so difficult...

I even thought that something was wrong with me haha

I'm prone to overthinking when I can't do what I'm doing.

Be it studying or doing presentation slides up.

The moment I can't figure the next step out, I get frustrated.

I'm just so worried.

What if I can't do well?

What if I can't get into university?

GAH

At least here I can rant.

I don't want to study two years in a diploma for nothing. I'm going to do well.

I'm going to do better.

I just have to convince myself that I can do it and believe that I can achieve what I want.

Right?

But it's so tough...

Last two days of exams and I'm free.

I can just pass the difficult papers, I can score a C and I'll be happy.

Who likes failing?

/le sighs

I sound weird don't I?

Ranting and then comforting myself.

Well, it beats going crazy.

Anyway, if anyone reads this, I thank you for your time to read my rant.

I feel a tad better.

Haha

- belle