Story Ideas: which is better??

[Original]

[INFINITE∞-PARADISE]

(Because my heart is a broken heart. I can’t let you go like this, what now?)

Yoona’s beautiful and lovely face looked sorrow. L was in total shock when his lover wanted to break up with him.

(Even If I look shaky and dangerous. I can only hold you in, what now?)

“But…why? Why Yoona? Did I do something wrong to you that made you think of this decision?” L asked her. He was very discontented about this situation.

Yoona shook her head denying the question, with the heartrending eyes looking to the ground.

(I love you (I’m sure you do too) I won’t do it (You will do it))

“Then, is it because I don’t have the money to pamper you with?” He said.

“It’s not about that, L oppa…” She said slowly and shook her head.

(I will do it, I’m gonna look at you)

“Or, you have someone else in your heart? Is that it?!” L asked, enraged by his own jealousy.

“No!” Yoona shook her head even harder this time. Tears flowed out with her cries.

(Please stay here, I’m asking you a favor, I’ll treat you better, I can’t let you go yet)

L took out the small red box from his jumper pocket. Yoona eyed at it.

(I must live; I must survive, because I will stop someday)

“Look at this sweetheart. It’s the thing that I’ve promised to you long ago… It’s now in front of your eyes.” L opened the red box that was in his hand and showed the content of the box, the proposing ring.

(This place is a paradise only if you’re here.)

Yoona looked at the ring and she cried even more. She hid her griefing expression inside of her hands.

(A paradise that has locked you in against your will)

“This is my promise and the proof that I love you sweetheart. No one is in my heart except you, Im Yoon Ah. It beats only for you.”

(A sad paradise that you won’t go if you’re awake)

“No… we can’t be together L…not anymore…” Yoona sobbed, still covering her face with her hand.

(A paradise that we can be together forever)

L froze lifelessly at the bench. He felt like his heart had stopped beating like it was stabbed violently with a sharp katana blade. It hurts so much to him.

(I can only watch you while holding my breath; I can only do so because it might break)

Yoona removed the hand that caged her face and looked at the dumbfounded L. She felt very sorry for him. L looked emotionless, still can’t believe what he had heard from her lover, Yoona.

(You looked at me (You probably will) you didn’t look (You will))

“Oppa…”She called L and it brought him back on-line from his disconnection. He looked at her with the dissapointed face.

“So…after all these years we’ve been together…this is how it ends?”

Yoona looked back at him and didn’t utter a word about it. I made him more frustrated than before.

(You look at me and it hurts)

L closed his eyes and breathed deeply to try calming himself. But frustration clouded his mind. He reached for Yoona’s hand but the latter averted it. He felt bitter because of it.

(Please stay here, I’m asking you a favor, I’ll treat you better, I can’t let you go yet)

“You have promised that we will be together forever! Why Yoona?! Why?!! Why does it need to be like this to both of us?!”

(I must live; I must survive, because I will stop some day)

(This place is a paradise only if you’re here)

The gloomy beauty didn’t reply anything to the question and it was really a shocker when he suddenly shouted. She sat there silent, not uttering any word. She understood his pain of the dissapointment.

(A paradise that has locked you in against your will)

The mourning eyes of the gray-furred black beauty eyed at the heartbroken L which sat in front of her. They exchanged a sad glance.

(A sad paradise that you won’t go if you’re awake)

L saw Yoona’s cheeks were puffy with crying. L wiped the tears that fell on her cheeks by means of his thumb. She held his arm firmly and looked straight at his solemn eyes.

“I will never forget you.” She stated.

(A paradise that we can be together forever)

Yoona locked her arms around L and cuddled him lovingly. She tilted her beautiful alluring face for L to kiss her on the lips. The latter moved his lips closer towards her and they touched.

(Every night, I filled with you. Now I have to fill it with alcohol, time. The arm that wrapped, the panting night)

Yoona closed her eyes, feeling the pleasure of the kiss.L felt the feel of Yoona’s soft and plump lips via his lips. He savored strawberry on her luscious lips, her favourite lip gloss taste. Yoona moaned a little when he gently bit her lips.

(The best paradise, without you it’s a hopeless world)

(I’m gonna hold you in a little longer. I’m gonna look at you a little more. Until my heart cools off a little more)

L broke the kiss unwillingly. Yoona opened her eyes and they looked into each other’s eyes. He still had the cold and solemn mask on his face. Frustration was on his face.

“Please… I beg you… don’t leave me Yoona.” He pleaded for one last time.

“I’ve told you many times… we will not be together again…”Yoona uttered.

It was a hopeless act to stop her from leaving him. She was determined to make it happen. But then, she saw the tough hearted L that she knew for years, cried a tear in front of her for the first time.

(I must live even without you, but right now, I need you)

“Oppa…” Yoona slowly called. She was feeling guilty because of her words.

It was too heartrendering for her to see her favourite man cried in front of her.

“No!!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH Yoona!! Why do you want to leave me?! Don’t you love me?!”

“Oppa…” It made her feel bad and sorry for him when he said that.

“Please… Yoona…please…don’t leave me…” He cried his hearts out.

“Oppa…please…just let me go…”

“No…!”

Yoona gave him the last goodbye kiss.

(This paradise is a paradise only if you’re here)

“Goodbye.” She broke the kiss and ran away from him.

“Yoona! Yoona!” He shouted the latter’s name and chased after her with all the strength he had.

“Yoona…!! Don’t leave me!” He cried and shouted.

(A paradise that has locked you in against your will)

“Please!! I beg you Yoona!” He tried hard to catch up with the girl.

“Go!! Just leave me!!” Yoona shouted back and she cried at the same time.

(A sad paradise that you won’t go if you’re awake)

L accidentally tripped and he fell harshly to the ground. He growled in pain. His teary eyes looked helplessly at the slowly dissapearing Yoona.

“Yoona!!” He cried her name.

But the latter didn’t look back. Yoona vanished from his sight. L cried in agony and felt only frustration, dissapointment, sorrow and hopeless. A part of him had lost from his life, his will of living and his strength of love.

He cried, cried and cried miserablely.

(A paradise that we can be together forever)

Edited

[VIXX - ERROR]

Yoona’s beautiful and lovely face was sorrow. L was in total shock when his lover wanted to break up with him. He still can't believe he heard those remarks from her one and only

“But…why? Why Yoona? Did I do something wrong to you that made you think of this decision?” L asked her. He was very discontented in this situation.

Yoona shook her head denying the question that he asked, with the heartrending eyes looking to the ground as if she's searching for solace in between the cracks of the pavement and on the grassfield in front her.

“Then, is it because I don’t have the money to pamper you with?” He said, still begging for answers from her.

“It’s not about that, L oppa…” She said slowly and shook her head.

Then what is it? He thought. A grave thought entered his mind and he asked her again if that's the case.

“Or, you have someone else in your heart? Is that it?!” L asked, enraged by his own jealousy.

Yoona's eyes widened.

“No!” Yoona shook her head even harder this time. Tears flowed out with her cries.

"I can't read you Yoona, please tell me what is it then."

Yoona gave no reply. L breathed out frustrated. He then took out the small red box from his jumper pocket. Yoona eyed at it.

“Look at this sweetheart. It’s the thing that I’ve promised to you long ago… From the time we had our kiss here. It’s now in front of your eyes.” L opened the red box that was in his hand and showed the content of the box, the proposing ring.

Yoona looked at the shiny ring and she it made her tear up even more. She hid her grief inside of her hands and it's not like L can't see it.

“This is my promise and the proof that I love you so much sweetheart. This is my oath to be forever with you until we grow old and to the end of our lives. No one, not a single one is in my heart except you, Im Yoon Ah. My heart beats only for you and only you, no other.” L expressed his true inner feelings to her in his sincere words.

“No… no... no... we can’t be together L… not anymore… not like what we used to be... ” Yoona sobbed, still covering her face with her hand.

L froze lifelessly at the bench. He felt like his heart had stopped beating like it was stabbed violently with a sharp katana blade. It hurts so much to him.