Let's not fall in love

1. Free

Dreams should not be like this. He shouldn't have to wake up with scenes so vivid to resemble a memory. But it wasn't. It wasn't.

He was not going to come back.

However even knowing the truth, his mind liked to play sick tricks. It hurt like hell.

“ I don't want to fall in love ever again.”

Because it had screwed him totally and finally, and all that had remained for him was to run.

When he enrolled for the overseas program he didn't actually take into account some details. Like the cultural and language barrier, the huge distance and above all the fourteen hours flight to get there. However he was too busy trying to shorten the gap in the language department to dedicate his time worrying about the other aspects.

In the end he had to face the ugly truth. When it was actually too late to come down from the airplane, screaming.

Seungri typed furiously on his phone like his life depended on it. He glanced left and right checking if there was in sight the flight attendants who less than a minute before recommended the passengers to turn off their phones.

One ring, two rings, three. God dammit, pick up!

“Don't tell me you forgot something” said a monotonous voice.

“Not exactly”.

“Ri you were here non other than fifteen minutes ago!”

“ Things can happen”.

“Lee Seunghyun”.

“Hyung”. Seungri could heard the heavy sigh of Youngbae. Stupid hyung. He should have been at least a little pained that he was leaving, instead he kept nagging at him till the last minute. But there was a reason he was calling him. Youngbae was his rock.

“Ok, promise me you won't make a fuss! It's juts a tiny detail after all. It's just that I kind of forgot to tell you that it can be, that maybe, probably, I'm afraid of flights.”

“You what?”

“Sir, I'm afraid I have to ask you turn your phone off.” He could hear Youngbae still babbling and cursing at the other end.

“Ah sure, just a second” he said with his sweetest tone trying to buy the flight attendant.

“Youngbae hyung what am I going to do” he whispered turning hysteric all of a sudden.

“Ri you should have said something”

“But everyone kept trying to convince me to not go.”

“ Because you barely know English.”

“ I got better!”

“That's not the not the point. Ah. Ri. Well remember it's rare for flight to fall down”

“You are not helping me at all!”

In that moment Seungri heard the engine start.

“Hyung do something!”

“Fighting?”

It wasn't so bad in the end. He didn't scream and somehow he ended up passing out for half of the flight. Once in the air the atmosphere wasn't that frightening and the only negative point was the two little brats whom he was seated with. After the shock he re organized himself taking out the last number of the national geographic. Some months before he would have read the last silly thriller book. Like he said to Youngbae, things happen.

Anyway he passed the rest of the time reading the magazine and listening to music when, checking the phone, he found out that there were only two hours left. Which meant he slept off 7 hours and he was going to pass the night awake. Wonderful. And they even skipped his lunch. All of sudden a flight attendant came to his seat.

“ Excuse me sir but the mother of these two kids asked t if you could kindly switch seat with her because she wants to stay beside her kids when the flight lands.” Seungri didn't mind at all, besides the kids were starting to squirm and get nervous. Finally his luck was coming back. He went to seat comfortably in the central seats, the one with the better tv view and far away form the windows.

He was on the way of putting on his earphones and let some random music blast him when a low voice asked form his right “Oh. Are you Korean?” Seungri evaluated for a glorious moment to just feign innocence and don't waste time to answer. He didn't escape South Korea only to bump into a Korean citizen. However he was Seungri the image of politeness so he had to turn. The man was probably older than him and well dressed. But why the heck was he wearing sunglasses inside an airplane?

“Ah, yes”

“such a coincidence” he replied but then just smiled, dimples on his cheeks and simply resumed his reading like nothing had happened. Seungri arched an eyebrow in disbelief. Oh shisus. A Korean citizen and even crazy. Well, it was for the better he didn't take a 14 hours flight to make friendship with random handsome guys. Yes he noticed but who knows maybe under those glasses he was ugly. Seungri shrugged and put his earphones on.

Seungri pass the last two hours in peace and relaxed until the fight attendants didn’t came to announce they were soon going to land startling him. Why? He felt nervous all of a sudden, cold sweat on his skin. Holy “I'm going to die”. He didn't even tried to put away his things. He just squeezed the armchairs and tried to calm down. But he was sure he was turning green. No no no.

“Are you all right?” Seungri didn’t even waste the time to reply, but ignored his neighbour.

“You are really pale”.

Seungri wanted to shout yes thank you so much for stating the obvious.

The vehicle started to fly down. Seungri could feel in every fibre of his body all the vibrations of that flying toy called airplane.

“ You know, I'm going to England to attend this famous academy of art. I have a passion for interior design and modern art. I don't know if you know modern art design. Bet not. I'll show you my pictures so you can understand”

Seungri didn't know why but he found himself staring at the photo displayed in the cellphone's man. “Look isn't this chair lovely? I know you are saying that seating on it would be hard, of course, but that's not the point. Oh I have to show you the entire catalogue I was watching before, there's people so talented out there!”

The man, who Seungri renamed “crazy seat neighbour” went on for what seemed hours,showing chairs upon chairs, later on switching to tables. Honestly Seungri was starting to think his neighbour was complete out of his mind. He was ready to call the flight attendant and ask to switch seat again , when he realized the plan was in that exact moment landing. He then heard the bell announcing to unfasten the seatbelt. What the heck had just happened. Crazy seat neighbour flashed a dimpled smile at him “See? I guess you liked the chairs too”, then he grabbed his backpack and followed the people out. Seungri remained frozen on the seat asking himself how he managed to not faint again. He finally stood up with the thought to kind of thanking crazy seat neighbour, but the man was nowhere in sight. Well whatever. Welcome to London.

London was huge. London was like the postcard his aunt had sent him last Christmas. He couldn’t wait to walk around and take as much pictures as possible. Yes his baby was again in his arms and passed intact all those fourteen hours of flight. The baby was his camera, the one that he bought with half of his savings and started to use like his life depended on it. The funny thing with photography was that 5 months before he couldn't give a damn. However he was so irritated with himself, with him, that without realizing he started to do the things he loved the most, just to show  that he Seungri, could do ten times better. So he learnt English and started to take photography's lessons. The first one turned out to be very useful since he now was in England. He didnt' anticipate to have some talent in the second. But he did. Even an amateur like him could tell. Ironically it was like he really was meant for photography and if it weren't for him he would have never find out. He wanted to laugh at the irony of destiny. Anyway the bus he took from the airport was taking forever and he couldn't wait to walk down,and begin his new life. A life when he wasn't the pathetic kid that was dumped but a young and talented foreigner.

Somehow the bus stopped at the station and he stepped down with enthusiasm. Now he had only to walk till the university dormitory. When he was in South Korea he had requested a double room, having some company seemed fun and besides he didn't planned to have someone to take to his room ever, so spaces in common were fine. Half an hour later dragging his 20 kg baggage for all the subways station hadn't been his smartest idea. It would have been better to take a taxi no matter how expensive, because he arrived at the entrance of the dormitory soaked in sweat. The receptionist however didn't blink at him but only took his documents to scan them. He was happy to notice that the receptionist actually understood him when he talked in English. Ha, one for me Youngbae! Once the registration was over he dragged his luggage till -thank god- the lift. He was at the fifth floor so he probably would have some panoramic view. He didn’t expect much, really. It  was a conquest to have managed to get to the other part of the world. He unlocked the room, somehow hoping his roomate wasn't there or praying he was a reasonable person. But when he was welcomed by a “Good evening my friend! I'm Kang Daesung!”by a Korean kid around his age he wanted to turn away and run. He managed to run in two fellow country men in less than 24 hours.

He sighed. “ Oh are you Korean too?” chirped the other. Seungri look up and down the kid a mass of idiocy and muscles, apparently. Then he nodded. The guy exclaimed in Korean. Perfect neither of them would have learnt a thing. Daesung smiled offering immediately help. He let him drag the luggage in their room which luckily was spacious enough, then he looked at his roomate's wall and found the oil painting hanged up which was obviously self made. Great another artist.

No matter how strange his arrive in England was, he forced himself to have a positive approach and so he forced himself to talk friendly to his new roomate who despite the babbling and the too bright personality at least was good at cooking, so the first meal he prepare for Seungri, who was starving, was great. He didn't say this to him because Daeusng would have become even more brighter and his dark soul couldn't take it. He passed the evening putting his things in the room and in the kitchen and he collapsed soon after dinner. He was woken up by the Daesung's 6 a.m alarm and by guy asking if he wanted to go to the gym with him. Of course not. But the damage was done and so he got up and lazily had breakfast turning on the tv to be distracted by the cartoons of the morning. After a well deserved shower he decided to go the university to clear the papers and familiarize with the road. He took with him the camera this time. The air was chilly but he didn’t mind the fresh breeze. He decided to take the bus instead of the subway to admire the panorama as the bus passed by. London was so different. The architecture above all was different from Seoul, history of another century. He didn't now how to describe but this was the architecture he had always imagined being of the cities of north Europe. He really felt far from home. The university was huge and really beautiful in his architecture and he couldn't help but take a picture. So with the map taken by the entry he shuffled through the hallways and gardens to go the secretary of the economic department. He didn't get lost and once in the international department of the economy, the staff lead him to the right room. After successfully enrolling and choosing the subjects he decided to walk through the gardens of the college, he liked the green, it's has been a while since the last time he went back to Gwanjiu where his grand parents lived and where green was a common color. He took again some photos and apparently he looked artistic enough because a student approached him, one with a black hat and sunglasses and  an air that screamed freakishness, and handed him a flier that was advertising a “modern art exhibition of interior design.” Bwa. No more freak artistic people, it was enough having Daesung as a roomate. He thought about crazy seat neighbour. He would have liked this . He shook his head. In the end not really knowing what to do since he had the day free, he continued walking and taking some photos here and there. He took the subway several times. He ended up in St. James Park. He took some pictures of the little ducks. After a while he seated on the green grass using his jacket as a blanket. He looked at the blue sky and inspired.

He felt like he was finally able to breath. No matter how far he was, how homesick he was going to feel, how lonely he was in the immensity of this city. He was in another country.

He was free.

He exhaled.

author's note: I'm so sorry. Sorry for taking so long. But I was in that period where I didn't know why and didn't know the sense of me continuing writing. My dreams are so far from my reality. I managed to squeeze this out of me, sorry if it's boring but I promise is going to get exicitng! Anyway I only went to London once so if there are mistakes, please forgive me ^_^ Please I appreciate some feed back, this was so hard! <3