Life is so unfair. I had always thought of that.

Giving you problems all at ones. Making you suffer all the time. They say that whatever is happening in your life, it's God's will. He has a plan for you. He won't give you problems you can't handle. They also say that He's just preparing you for something, so that when that time comes, you're ready.

But what the heck is he preparing me for? I grew up with a broken family. My father is a in' drunkard. My mother already past away because of an illness. We can't afford the medicines she needed because of poverty. Before, they always fight and never agree with each other. Our older brother left us already. Married his girlfriend and moved to another place without even saying goodbye or leaving any contacts. I just always knew he never cared. My two younger siblings? My auntie adopted them. They're still kids and it's better for them to be with auntie than with my bastard father. Though, it really pains me not to be able to be with them. My aunt won't allow me to even visit them. She's afraid that my father would go nuts and make a ruckus about it. Now she went abroad with them. I didn't even had the chance to say goodbye or even hug them for the last time. They just left like that. Always leaving me behind. And me? I'm still living with my effin' father, who's still a drunkard. Going home whenever he wants to. Yeah, we may be living under one roof but I don't give a damn about him.

I work at different part time jobs just to meet all my needs. Specially for my tuition fees. Yeah, I'm still pursuing my studies. I want to graduate in college and be a professional engineer. I go to school at day time and work afterwards. On weekends and days that I don't have school, I just work, work, work and work. At school, I focus on my studies. At break times or vacants, I do my homeworks, projects and other things that are related to school. Because after school, I still need to work. I don't have a permanent job. I just go with whatever I can earn money but of course, I don't do illegal things.

I lived independently. I told to myself that I can do anything by myself without the help of anyone. Maybe that's one of the reason why I don't have any friends. I unconsciously distanced myself to everyone. I don't know. I guess I'm just a coward. Afraid of being left behind again. Then there comes a time that I just wanted to give up on everything. I'm tired of all the s I have to go through. I'm tired of it all. This life. It's just full of sufferings, pains and s. So, I decided to end it. I don't care when, where or how. I just want to put an end to it.

But I guess life really loves to play with me.

As I was about to get hit by a big truck, someone grabbed and pulled me into his arms. I looked up at him and saw an angry face. He then started lecturing me, "What were you thinking?! Committing suicide?! If you have problems that's not the right solution for it! Killing yourself and ending your life like that won't change anything!"

And that is when it hit me. "Then what?! If ending this ing life of mine won't solve anything then what?! WHAT?! Tell me!! Tell me!! Just tell me!!" That's when I collapsed on the floor and started crying like an idiot. "Please tell me.. because I'm tired.. tired of all of this.."

"Shh. Stop crying now." He kneeled down in front of me and tried to comfort me.

Even though I'm not looking at him, I can feel that he's staring at me with those pitying eyes while I'm crying like a retard and cursing life for being cruel. And I hate that. Someone pitying me and he is even seeing me with this state. For s sake. I don't even know this guy. But I just can't hold it anymore. I can't hold back this tears longer.

And he surprised me with what he did next. He hugged me tightly like he doesn't have any intension of letting me go and said, "Whatever you're going through now, I'm here for you. I'll never leave you."

I was shocked but at the same time and for the first time, I felt at ease again.

"Promise?" I asked while sobbing.

"I promise." He hugged me even tightly. I can feel his sincerity with those words and his warm hug says that he'll protect me.

It was like I found my guardian angel. The one who'll protect me. The one who'll never leave me. The one who'll never hurt me. This guy named Byun Baekhyun, the person who changed me.

 

~ x ~

 

Baekhyun kept his promise. Which I wasn't really expecting because that incident that happened was.. Lets just say was just a spur of the moment? I was wrecked and a mess that I childlishly made him promise that but he still kept it to my surprise.

Apparently, he was my schoolmate. He was studying architecture. He would always stick with me. At first I was really not comfortable and a bit annoyed because he keeps on following me anywhere. Remember? I'm used to being alone all the time. So, I tried to avoid him as much as possible but he was just really that persistent.

 

"Hi Nicaaa~" Ugh. Here he comes again. I just rolled my eyes and just continued what I'm doing.

I'm at the garden right now. I used to spend my spare time studying at the library but because of Baekhyun, I was banned from staying there. God! He's so noisy and loud inside. Keeps on blabling about things. Telling jokes only he would laugh at. I guess the librian got irritated and I was just dragged along because he's always with me.

"Nicaaa~" He sat beside me.

"What do you want?" I said bluntly without even looking at him.

"Nothing." He giggled.

Sigh~ Really. This guy. But whatever. I need to finish this homework in physics first. So that I can just focus with my part time this afternoon.

"What are you doing?" He took a peek on what I was writing, "Physics, huh?"

"Uh-huh." I just nodded.

"Guess you're having a hard time." He smirked.

I looked up at him and raised an eyebrow, "So? The hell you care?"

"So.. That means you'll be needing the y, smart and handsome guy's help. Ha! Ha!"

"Don't be so full of yourself. I don't need any help from anyone." I scoffed.

"Why are you like that?" He pouted.

I just rolled my eyes and started scribbling notes again, "Because I can figure this out myself."

"No. Not that."

"What do you mean?" I look up at him with a confused face. His face was serious.

"What I mean is.. Why are you pushing others away from you? You're always distancing yourself from the rest. It's like you're afraid of something."

I was taken aback.

He noticed? Why? When?

"I.. Uhh.." I don't know how or what to answer. It was the first time someone said that to me.

"Nica, it's not like we're going to eat you or something. We're not monsters. We're just humans too, like you. Unless.. You're E.T." He then laughed.

"Aigoo~ Really now. You-- Ugh! I thought you're serious then all of a sudden.." Gawd this guy is making my head ache.

"Hahaha! You're always serious. Have some fun sometimes. Come on. Life's too short." He said while smiling.

"Tss. Who are you to lecture me?"

"Yeah. Who am I to you?"

"What the. Stop it, Baekhyun." I'm starting to get annoyed.

"I've been with you for weeks now but it seems that you still don't treat me as a friend."

"What the heck are you saying?"

"If I don't approach you first or talk to you, you'll always pretend that you don't know me." He keeps on ranting.

"It's because you're too noisy!" I reasoned out.

"No! It's not that. I can feel that it's not the only reason." He's looking at me seriously.

"What the heck are you saying?"

After a long pause, he sighed, "Fine~"

Huh? What? Fine? I really don't get this guy.

He continued, "We better start over." He offered his hand to me and smiled sweetly, "Hi! I'm Byun Baekhyun. Can I be your friend?"

What the heck. I just stared at his hand like a lost sheep.

"Come on. Don't tell me you don't know how to shake hands?" He pursed his lips.

"Of course I know, stupid!"

"Then what are you waiting for? Don't you want to be friends with me?"

"You can say that." I nodded in agreement.

"Oohh~ Come on. Give me a chance, please? I'll be a good friend." He put his hands together like he was praying and pouted.

Cute. Wait.. What?

"Ahh! Fine! Fine!" I waved him off.

"Yahooooo! I'm officially your friend! Yehet!"

And with that I officially became friends with this kid.

 

 

 

Days.. Weeks.. Months pasts.

As time past, I eventually got used to Baekhyun's presence. To tell you the truth, he's quite fun to be with. Though, he's the opposite of me. He's always full of energy. Always jokes around. You'll never get bored when you're with him. He never fails to make me laugh.

Honestly, I've begun to notice that I actually changed. I've started to have more friends now. Now, I'm always smiling and became more approachable. I've begin to have a whole new point of view in life. Yeah, he changed me. A lot.

 

 

 

"Aah~ Finally. Exams are over." Baekhyun lays beside me. Puts his arms beneath his head. We're at the school's garden now.

"Yeah. Hell week is done." I said.

"Uh-huh. So, where do you want to hang out later? Oops! Sorry. I forgot that you still have a part ti--"

"Anywhere is fine." I cut him off without looking at him. I just kept on admiring the beautiful sky and the nice weather today.

"What?" He said looking at me.

"Are you deaf?" I looked at his direction, "I said anywhere is fine. As long as we're going to have fun."

"Then it's settled. We're going to the playground later." He said while laughing.

"What? Baek, you've got to be kidding me. What are you? A five year old kid?"

"Why? It's fun there. Hahaha!"

"Really." I just smiled at him.

This guy can really be a dork sometimes. But I owe him a lot. If it isn't because of him I wouldn't be able to enjoy myself like this.

I sat up and hugged my knees while resting my chin on it. Baekhyun was still laying beside me while looking at the sky.

"Hey Baek." I said.

"Hm?"

"Thank you." I just said softly but making sure that he'll hear what I said.

"For what? For suggesting to hang out at the playground later?"

"Idiot! Not that! And why would I even thank you for that stupid suggestion?" I scoffed looking back at him.

"Hahaha! Chill. I was just kidding. Hahaha! What a hot headed girl. Really."

I just sighed and turn my back on him again.

"Really. Thank you." I continued and hugged my knees tightly.

"For what, seriously?"

"For everything."

"Everything?" He sat up but I'm still not looking at him.

"Yeah. For everything. For always being there for me. And if it wasn't for you I wouldn't be here anymore."

"Nica, you don't have to thank me."

"No. I want to and I really am thankful." This time I turned to face him and gave him my sweetest smile.

He just stared at me like that.

He suddenly pulled me into a hug which surprised me.

"Baek?"

He hugged me tightly, "I'm also thankful that I met you."

"Why?"

He released me from his hug, "Because I found someone to mock and annoy everyday."

"Why you!" I hit his head.

"Aw! Why did you do that for?" He said while massaging his head.

"You deserve it, stupid!" I scoffed, crossed my arms and turn my back at him.

"I was just joking Miss Hot Head." He mocked.

I didn't respond.

"But the thank you part is true. I'm really thankful that I met you." I turned to him and saw his sweet smile.

"That day," I said. "Why did you made such promise? You don't even know me but then.. You.."

"I don't know." He said while looking at the sky, "When I saw you crying, you look so fragile and I just felt like I wanted to protect you. I said to myself that I'll protect you no matter what. I won't let anyone hurt you anymore. I'm not sure why but there's one thing I'm definitely sure of," he looked straight into my eyes and smiled, "I don't regret anything."

I smiled back.

Yeah. I'm really thankful to have him.

 

 

Everything went smooth everyday. Baekhyun and I became more close to each other. I gain more friends, hangs out with them and enjoy myself more often. It's really good to have someone beside you. Someone you can lean on in times of trouble. It's much more better than being alone and facing things by yourself. Yeah, I learned to trust again. And it's because of Baekhyun. He helped me to trust again.

 

 

"Where's Channie?" I asked Baekhyun beside me.

"The hell I care." He scoffed and started eating his lunch.

We're at the school's canteen now and having our lunch but Chanyeol is still not here.

"Nicaa~" I immediately recognized that husky voice. I looked up and I was right, it was Chanyeol walking in our direction while holding a plate and waving at us with his free hand.

I just wave back at him and he sat in front of us.

"Sorry, I'm late. Prof made me run some errand." Chanyeol explained while rubbing the back of his neck.

"Teacher's pet." Baekhyun hissed. I glared at him and he gave me a what-did-I-do look. I just rolled my eyes.

"Why?" Chanyeol asked us. Good thing he didn't hear what Baekhyun said.

"Oh, nevermind him. It's fine anyway. We didn't wait that long." I smiled at Chanyeol and he smiled back. We started to eat our lunch then.

This past weeks, I don't know what's with Baekhyun. He always seems to be in menopause. Specially when Chanyeol is around.

Speaking of Chanyeol, we're in the same class in Math but he's with Baekhyun most of his subjects. We became friends and he hangs out a lot with us now. Before, it's just always me and Baekhyun left but now Chanyeol is always with us. And I'm guessing Baekhyun doesn't like it. Really. Sometimes, I don't know what he is thinking.

"I'm done eating." Baekhyun said, stood up and was about to leave.

"Hey wait! But you barely touch your food!" I shouted at him but he didn't mind me and just walk out of the canteen. "Jeez. That guy." I sighed.

"Better follow him if I were you."

"Huh?" I looked at Chanyeol who was now happily eating a burger.

"I think he's kinda jealous of me." He continued.

"What? Jealous? Why would he be jelouse?"

Chanyeol shrugged, "Dunno. So better settle things now before it's too late."

Jeez. Why would he be jealous? Me and Chanyeol are just friends. Besides, I know who Chanyeol likes. It's one of my friends at the other class.

"Fine." I stood up and followed Baekhyun outside.

"Good luck!" I heard Chanyeol shout. I just smiled then left the canteen.

Yeah. Channie is right. Better settle things now before it's too late. Besides, I don't want to be like this with Baekhyun. I don't want to lose him like this. No. Not him. I may have many friends now but I don't care. He's the one I want beside me and no one else. Just him. That's enough for me. No. It's more than enough.

 

I can't find him anywhere then it hit me. Right. I haven't look at the garden yet.

I went there and my instinct didn't failed me. He was there. Leaning at a three. His eyes closed. I sat beside him.

This is our favorite place and spot here at the campus. It's quiet here. Far from all the noise. We both always hang out here. It's like our secret place.

"I miss this." I said. Baekhyun didn't said a word. He just stayed in his position, still eyes closed. I know that he knows it's me.

"I haven't been here here for awhile. I kind of miss it." I said again. Still. No response.

Really. He can be a brat sometimes.

"Do you still come here often?" I said then he sat up and looked straight into my eyes with a serious face.

"Are you kidding me?" He said with a pissed tone.

"Hey. Why? I was just asking."

"Duh! Of course I always go here! This is our favorite place! We always hang out here! Just the two of us! Maybe you forgot about that now, am I right? Because you're always with that Chanyeol guy!" He keeps on ranting, "I guess you're sick to be with me now. It's always that Chanyeol now! Damn it!"

"What?! What the hell are you saying?! What is your problem?!" I shouted back at him.

He stood up, "You're asking me what is my problem? God, Nica! God knows I'm always here waiting for you! But what? Where were you?! You're always with that guy, flirting!"

"What?! Flirting?! You think I was just flirting?!" I shouted back and stood up too. Gahd! This is getting in my nerves.

"Then what else you call it?! You're always with him! Always clinging to him!"

"I. Am. Not." I said. "You're accusing me wrongly! I am not flirting with him! We're friends for god's sake, Baekhyun!"

"Friends? Yeah right. Friends." He said and turn his back on me. "You can go back to your 'friend' now. It's rude to make him wait." He said with a sarcastic tone while emphasizing the word friend.

"What's with you?! Why are you acting so childish?!"

He turn to face me, "I'm jealous! Can't you see?!"

I didn't responded immediately. I was surprised. So, he was really jealous.

"W-why?" I asked.

"Because I have feelings for you.." He turn his back again at me, "I.. I love you." He whispered.

"What?" I asked. I feel like I've gone deaf with what he said.

He didn't respond.

"Fine." I said with an irritated voice. "If you don't wa--"

He cut me off with a kiss on the lips. A passionate one. I was shocked but not angry. In fact, I was happy. I can hear my heart beating crazily like it's out of control. It feels like my chest would explode any moment now.

His soft lips moved away slowly from mine, ending the kiss.

"Now. Do also want me to repeat that?" Baekhyun said while smirking.

I didn't said anything. I don't know what to say. My mind went blank because of that kiss. But I can feel my face burning hot. Maybe I look like a tomato now.

He frowned because I didn't said anything. "Okay.. Sorry. I guess I surprised you." He backed away from me.

I immediately grabbed his hand and said the first thing that came into my mind, "I.. I like it."

Wait.. What?! Why did I say that?! Well.. It's true though but.. Ahhhasdmgngegw!

I blushed even more as I saw him smirking.

"W-w-what?!" I asked, stuttering.

"You what?" He pretended like he didn't heard what I said.

"I-- I didn't said anything." I scoffed and crossed my arms. But damn! I can still feel my face burning.

He just smirked and pulled me into his arms and kissed me passionately again.

After that he looked straight in my eyes and I did the same too.

"I love you, Nica."

I smiled, "I love you too, Baekhyun."

And we sealed our love for each other with a kiss.

This feeling. I wish it would last forever.

 

~ x ~

 

Years past.

I thought everything would go smooth from that day onwards but I was wrong.

One day I found out that my father were using and selling these illegal drugs. I got involved in this case because my father was doing it at our house but Baekhyun didn't leave me. He was always there beside me until it was proven that I was innocent while my father was sent to jail.

Because of that incident, I decided to move and just live in an apartment. It's better that way and I could also start a new beginning there. Though it wasn't that easy. I still got problems to face but I was not alone this time. Baekhyun was with me. Yeah, he was always there.

Me and Baekhyun are still together now for five years. He never left me. He made me feel so loved everyday. Our love growing stronger as each day past. Everything went fine then.

Until that day..

We were at the playground, just passing the time and relaxing ourselves.

I was sitting at the swing while watching Baekhyun play with the kids. He loves kids. That's why he always jokes that after we get married, we're going to make dozens of children.

That dork, really. I giggled at the thought.

"Hey. Why are you laughing by yourself there?" I looked to the one who was talking and saw Baekhyun.

"Why? Is it a bad thing to enjoy myself?" I joked.

He laugh a bit, "No but we should go home now. It's getting late." He held out his hand to me.

I grabbed it and started walking home with our hands intertwined. We talked about things while walking but most of the time, he was the one who's telling stories. He never runs out of things to tell but that was one thing I like about him.

We're almost at my apartment when I noticed that he suddenly became quiet and and felt that his gripped at my hand tightened. Then he stopped walking.

I looked up at him and saw him suffering from pain. His face tells it all. His free hand was on his chest, clutching it tightly.

"What's wrong?" I asked with a concerned tone.

"I'm fine. Don't worry about me." He waved me off.

"Are you sure?" I asked again. He doesn't look fine.

"Yeah. Yeah. I still need to bring you home." He said while composing himself. His breathing became uneven and you can still see in his face that he was feeling something really painful.

"But--"

"I said I'm fi--"

"Baekhyun! Baekhyun!! BAEKHYUN!!"

I felt like everything crashed in front of me when I saw Baekhyun fall on the ground. I kept on calling his name but he didn't respond. His body was cold and he just kept on clutching his chest tightly. I started to call for help and luckily some people around us came and helped.

 

~

 

I learned that that he had a heart attack that time.

"How is he, doc?" I asked the doctor in front of me but my gaze is glued to Baekhyun who's laying at the hospital bed, sleeping. We're at the hospital now. Baekhyun got confined.

"For now, he's fine. He just needs rest."

"What do you mean for now?" I looked up straight at him.

He sighed and said, "He's condition is not good. If this continues, he needs a heart transplant soon."

I didn't respond. I don't know what to respond or what to react.

I don't know anything. He didn't told me anything.

I sat at the chair next to Baekhyun's bed when the doctor left.

I rested my head beside him when suddenly I felt a hand brushing my head.

I looked up and saw Baekhyun smiling at me. I grabbed his hand and enclosed it with mine.

I want to nag him. I want to shout at him. I want to ask if he knows about his condition. Why didn't he told me anything. I want to ask so many things but my voice got stuck up in my throat and the tears that I was holding back suddenly fell.

"Why?" That was all I managed to say in a cracked voice.

"Shh. Stop crying." He wiped the tears off my face with his thumb, "It hurts me to see you like that."

"Then why?!" I looked down, still clutching his hand, "Why didn't you said anything to me about this?"

"I.. don't want to be a burden to you."

"Damn it, Baek! That's an old and lame excuse!" I drew closer to him, meeting his gaze. Tears still falling from my eyes, "Damn you. Don't you know that I will never look at you like that?" I touched my forehead with his, "You will never be a burden to me."

He gently caresses my face, "I'm sorry." He whispered then tears started to fall from his eyes, "I'm sorry."

I shook my head, "We'll go through this together. I won't leave you, Baek. I won't. Promise me too you'll never leave me."

He just nodded then he pulled me into a hug.

"Come on, Baekhyun. Promise me. Say it." I hugged him tightly while still crying, "Promise me you won't leave me."

"I promise." He said in between his sobs.

We just stayed like that for a moment. Not knowing what awaits us in the near future.

 

~

 

Baekhyun stayed at the hospital. The doctor said it was best for him to stay. Baekhyun didn't like it, though. He said that if he was going to die sooner or later, he doesn't want to spend his remaining days staring at the four lifeless white walled bedroom in the hospital. He wants to be outside and enjoy his last days to the fullest with the people dear to him.

We argued about it a lot. Yeah, he has his point but we don't have a choice. He needs to stay. That's why I tried to lighten the mood everytime I visit. I have work to attend to in the morning then after that I go straight at the hospital. I'll stay there and take care of Baekhyun until morning then I'll just come home to wash then head to my job again. Yeah. It sort of became my daily routine for almost a month now.

 

Two months had passed. But Baekhyun's condition isn't getting any better.

He's growing weaker and weaker. At first, we can still stroll the hospital's garden but now he can't. He keeps on getting heart attacks very often. Very often that sometimes, talking to him for an hour could cause his heart attack. And every attack is more painful than the previous ones.

His doctor said to me that he needs a heart transplant soon. We just have to find a heart that is compatible with him.

But I don't know if the whole world is against us or is it just me and my ing curse that all of the people I love is meant to be taken away from me. We couldn't find any heart that's compatible with Baekhyun.

 

Does God has a grudge on me? He made my family a mess. My life, miserable. And just when I thought everything's going to be fine. This happens?

Even Baekhyun? Why? Why do you have to do this? He's the only one left for me! He's the one who made sense to my pointless life! Why does he have to suffer? Why does this have to happen? Why him? I should be the one suffering! I'm the one who's messed up! I don't have anyone who'll grieve for me when I die. But Baekhyun.. He still has a family, friends and people waiting for him.

 

That night I didn't went to visit Baekhyun. I just stayed at my apartment, curled myself in bed.

Crying my heart out..

While Baekhyun's cheerful and cute eye smile is clear in my visions.

 

~

 

"Merry Christmas." Baekhyun greeted me as I sat at the chair next to his bed. He was sitting and leaning at the pile of pillows behind him.

Despite of his weak and fragile look, their is still a smile plastered on his face.

"It's still too early for that." I said with a small grin. My eyes are still sore from crying last night.

He shook his head, "No. I don't know if I'll be able to say it to you on that day."

"No. Don't say that. Please." I closed my eyes.

"Have you been crying?" He cupped my cheeks with both hands.

I look down the floor, fighting back the tears that wants to make its way from my eyes.

I heard him heaved out a sigh, "Look, Nica. Anytime soon I'll be gone and--"

"No. No. Stop it. Don't say that." I held his hands that was still cupping my face, "Please. I'll find a way. Just trust me." Then tears started to fall from my eyes, "I'll find a compatible heart for you. You'll live then we'll fulfill all the dreams and promises we made for each other."

"Nica.."

"Remember.. when you said that a-after getting married we're going to make dozens of children? T-then we're going to build our dream house together. Re-remember? We still have.. lots of things to do. Together." I said in between my sobs. It's hard to talk now because I was crying uncontrollably and my heart was aching so much to top it all.

"Nica." He made me look straight in his eyes, "Nica, I'm sorry. I know this would be hard for you but when I'm gone, you have to move on."

"No.. No.." I shook my head. Then he pressed his forehead to mine. I closed my eyes and tried to stop crying but to no avail.

"Nica, listen. Whatever happens to me, please, move on without me. I know you can." I can feel his tears falling and tried his best to hold his sobs.

"Stupid! How could you say that? You were the one who thought me how to hold on. How could I continue living if the person I'm holding on to would leave me?" I spat out while crying non-stop.

He shook his head, "I'll still be with you and protect you. It's a promise, though, not the way you want me to." He smiled bitterly, "I love you. I may be gone but not the love I feel for you." He gently kissed my forehead, "I'm sorry for hurting you this much."

"It'll be much more painful if you'll die. By that time, I don't know if I can handle it anymore, Baek."

"It'll eventually heal. You're the strongest person I've ever known, Nica."

How stubborn, I thought. I didn't argue anymore. I just kept on crying and the same goes to him.

He hugged me tightly and whispered, "I love you."

"I love you, too."

Those words were warm. But my heart can't help but to break in pieces.

 

~

 

"Good morning, Byun Baekhyun!" she greeted me enthusiastically as she stepped inside my hospital room.

I was in a sitting position and was leaning my back on my pillows.

"Hey. What's with the sudden bright mood? The last time I checked I'm still sick and-"

"Oh. God. Baek. You are such a mood ruiner. Damnit." she rolled her eyes.

I just giggled and patted the side of my bed. She seemed to understand and sat at the side of my bed. Her back at me so she twisted her body a little to face me.

"So, what do you want for breakfast, your majesty?" she asked me mockingly, drawing her face nearer to mine. I just giggled and stared at her then she did he same.

I looked at her lips then stole a kiss from her, "Now, that's more than enough for my breakfast." I smiled sweetly.

She smiled back but suddenly turned her back to me. Not fast enough though, as I saw a tear fell from her eye.

"Ah. Really. You surprised me." She gave out a low chuckle but I can sense that she was fighting for a sob to come out.

As I was about to say something she raised a white plastic bag in front of me and said, "So, I guess you don't wan't this?" she smirked.

I looked at the white plastic, "Is that ice cream?"

"Uh-huh." Her smirked grew into a grin.

"Really now? Ice cream for breakfast? Are you kidding me?"

"Whatever. Besides, I wasn't thinking of sharing it to you either. So. I guess it's fine." she rolled her eyes and brought out the container before opening it to eat it.

I just shrugged and laughed.

At times like this it's rare to see her lively and playful side again.

We spend the whole day together. Eating the ice cream she brought and talking about our past, may it be good or bad memory. She didn't left me even for a second that day. Before, she'll be leaving me for a moment to buy something at the nearest convenient store. I asked her why but she just said that she was too lazy to buy something. So, I just said okay and enjoyed every moment I was with her because maybe this could be the last day I'll be spending with her.

 

~ x ~

 

Life is so unpredictable.

You'll never know when your time is up. Even if you're just fingers away from falling to death. Life can always pull you back up.

And that's what happened to Byun Baekhyun.

 

 

 

"Baek? Baekhyun! Baekhyun!"

Baekhyun heard a faint call of his name that grew louder as Chanyeol ran up to him as he pushed himself from the crowd.

Baekhyun stopped wandering and turned to look up the familiar voice he heard but as just he turned around, Chanyeol was towering over him and he slightly jump out of surprise, "Oh. Hey, Chanyeol."

Chanyeol smiled while catching his breath, he then motioned to Baekhyun to start walking again.

There's a moment of silence before Chanyeol decided to talk.

"So, how're you doing?" he asked while glancing down at Baekhyun whose head was hanging down as they walked side by side.

Baekhyun didn't answered right away. They sat at the nearest bench when he decided to answer, "Fine but it could've been great if--" He trailed off as he sighed and looked up at the night sky. It's still the month of December and christmas day had just passed by like a blur to him. Even though the doctor said that his new heart is healthy, he can't help it. He feels something heavy inside him, "If Nica was here." He finally said. Exactly, Nica was the first thing he saw before his surgery but not after. Up until now.

He asked everyone multiple times where she is but they just always give him a look of symphaty. He doesn't understand and doesn't want to at the same time.

"Did- did they tell you who gave you that heart?" Chanyeol suddenly asked.

"What do you mean?" Baekhyun shot Chanyeol a confused look. That's right. Nobody told him who gave him this heart that was beating warmly inside of him. He don't know why or how to explain the odd feeling inside of him sometimes. That warm feeling, the feeling that he'll be loved eternally was great. It's odd but he loved those strong feeling. Like it assures him that he'll never be alone, that he'll be forever loved.

"I don't know if it's the right time, Baek but I guess that there wouldn't be a right time."

"What are you talking about?"

Chanyeol pulled out a white envelope from his pocket, "Nica.. It's her who gave you that heart, Baek."

"What?" Baekhyun freezed. Did he just heard him right? "No.. No.." he furiously shook his head, not wanting to accept the truth.

"I'm sorry, Baek but it's true."

"No.." Baekhyun said and looked away when his eyes started to sting.

"Here. She wants me to give you this." Chanyeol hands the envelope to Baekhyun who took and opened it immediately, "I'm sorry it took me some time to give this to you but-"

Right then and there Baekhyun collapsed. Tears started to fall from his eyes continuesly but it's not enough to express the pain he feels right now. It's too painful to handle. It was like he was stab directly in the heart. He feels like some of him just died.

Chanyeol didn't exactly know what to do but he built up his courage and used it to hug the little brunete that was shattered into pieces beside him.

 

 

 

 

Hey, Baek.

I'm sure by the time you read this I'm not around anymore. I'm sorry for not telling you but it is the only choice I have. Don't worry. I don't regret anything. I'm happy with my decision. It's all I could do for you.

Please take care of your heart, Baek, our heart.

I love you! Don't forget. I'll love you forever.

 

Love,

Nica.

 

---

 

Note: Sorry for any typos and grammar errors. And my deepest apology for a quite ty story. Thank you for reading until the end!