Final
Ticking time, one two three.Happy eunhae day!
6k words ahaha hope you guys don't get bored
And pls brace yourselves for the ending :x
--
Donghae has never been one to socialise with others. He's a geek, and he only associates himself with equations, formulas and things like the Pythagoras theorem. He barely talks to anyone, and when he does everything comes out mathematical. His life is precise, accurate, simple. Just like how mathematics is.
Every morning, before school starts, Donghae grabs himself a cup of coffee and then sits at the cafeteria, working on a new math sum. He will look up at 7.15, to see the old professor hobbling by with his tattered briefcase. He then scrunches up his nose, pushing up his glasses before looking back to his math textbook.
At around ten, Shindong and his gang will come up to him and push him against the gym lockers. Donghae lets himself be pushed, and he reaches into his pockets, handing over the money.
There's still a stoic expression on Donghae's face, though. The only thing he does is to return to the classroom, wipe his bloodied lip, then continue to fill in his math textbook.
This is the story of Lee Donghae, the math geek.
-
One morning, at 7.15, he looks up. He sees the old professor hobbling by and he pushes his glasses up. Just then, he feels a stinging sensation in his wrist. He scratches at it, continuing to work on the third equation on the page.
The pain soon becomes unbearable though, and he looks down. The pen he's holding - the Uniball pen he's been using for four years - clatters to the table.
There are lines forming on his wrist, and as they twist and turn, the lines soon becomes numbers. Donghae only stares blankly. There is a loud beeping sound, and the timer begins. Donghae looks around to see if anyone heard the noise, and everything seems to be normal. The old professor is still hobbling towards the lift.
He lifts up his glasses and puts them back down again. The timer is still there.
60 days: 3 hours: 2 minutes: 44 seconds.
Donghae walks towards his physics lecture, feeling the burn on his wrist. It's been two days, and the timer is still there. He sighs, but he visibly brightens as he sees the formulas on the board. Physics is another one of his favorite subjects, because it is similar to math, but not entirely the same. He pulls down his sleeve and heads towards his seat.
Fifteen minutes and twenty equations later, Donghae feels someone sliding into the seat next to his. That's unusual - he thinks, for no one has ever sat next to him before.
"Hey." Donghae heads the person speak, but he's too preoccupied with the question to look up.
The person nudges him, and he gasps. The contact had caused excruciating pain on his wrist. He looks up, finding worried eyes on him.
"Hey, you okay?" Donghae flinches, rubbing at his wrist. Seeing the other's expression, Donghae pulls his sleeve down, scratching his head as he nods.
The boy then smiles, sticking his hand out.
"I'm Hyukjae. Lee Hyukjae." Donghae only nods, turning back to his paper. Hyukjae's hand is left awkwardly in the air, and he slowly lowers it.
"Um.. I'm Hyukjae!" Hyukjae tries again, placing a hand on Donghae's shoulder. Donghae jumps backwards, but his eyes widen in surprise when he realises there is no excruciating pain at his wrist - instead, there is a warm, almost comforting sensation.
Donghae then reaches his hand out, letting it clasp loosely around the other's.
"Donghae." He murmurs, and he sees the smile spreading across the other's face.
Donghae notes that Hyukjae has a gummy smile.
-
Donghae settles himself comfortably on the grass patch under the tree in the school garden. He takes out his sandwich - wholemeal bread, with two tomatoes, two slices of ham and 3 pieces of lettuce.
"Hey!" Donghae nearly drops his sandwich.
"Hyukjae, remember?" Donghae only nods awkwardly.
"So-" Hyukjae begins, and Donghae flinches visibly. "Hey-" Hyukjae reaches his hand towards Donghae and this time, Donghae backs away, his sandwich falling to the ground. Hyukjae immediately retracts his hand.
Donghae gulps, looking at Hyukjae's guilt-stricken expression.
"Um, sorry. I just- I'm not used to being around others." Donghae mumbles, hand curling around a tuft of grass.
Hyukjae only nods, whispering a quiet "sorry".
The next day, Hyukjae sits next to Donghae again during lunch.
Donghae looks curiously at the paper bag in Hyukjae's hands, eyes widening in surprise as the paper bag lands in his hands. He reaches in, and takes out a sandwich.
Hyukjae smiles.
"It's for you," Hyukjae says with a grin on his face. "Sorry about yesterday."
"Oh." Donghae mumbles.
He takes a bite into the sandwich. It's not as great as the one he makes himself, but it still tastes rather all right. Donghae looks up to find Hyukjae shuffling from foot to foot, looking nervously at him.
Donghae hesitantly pats at the empty spot next to him, trying to smile as best as he can. It makes his face twist awkwardly, and Hyukjae bursts out into laughter. Donghae finds himself almost laughing along.
"Hey, Donghae."
"Yeah?"
"Tell me more about yourself." Donghae looks up at this, hands fiddling with the empty plastic wrap.
"There's... nothing much to say about myself."
"That's not what I think," Hyukjae murmurs. "I think you're pretty amazing."
Donghae eyebrows furrow, and he looks at Hyukjae inquisitively.
"What makes you say that?"
Hyukjae only smiles.
"Top student in the nation for physics and math, huh?"
"Oh." Donghae blushes, abandoning the plastic wrap and playing with the tuft of grass in his hand instead.
Donghae moves to lean against the tree trunk, and the slight movement causes the lower part of Donghae's neck to be exposed, revealing a purple bruise.
"Hey." Hyukjae says worriedly. "What happened?"
Donghae follows Hyukjae's line of sight and he flushes, covering his neck.
"Ah, that. It's nothing to worry about, really." Donghae murmurs. "Perks of being the top student in physics and math, huh?"
Hyukjae opens his mouth to say something but Donghae dismissively waves his hand, showing Hyukjae that he doesn't want to talk about it anymore.
"So," Hyukjae says. "Let's play ten questions!"
"Ten questions?"
"Yeah. I'll ask you ten questions, and you'll ask me ten as well."
"All right.."
"So, Donghae. What are your favorite subjects?"
"That's quite obvious. Physics and Math. Your turn. What are yours?"
"Hold on - tell me why first."
"Well," Donghae takes a deep breath. "They're just... beautiful I guess. Math especially. It's simple. Easy to understand. Not complicated, it's all rather straightforward. That's what I like about it. It's short and sweet, yet it's still pretty amazing." Donghae fiddles with his thumbs. Now, your turn."
Hyukjae smiles, tilting his head slightly towards the sky.
"Well, I like literature. I've never really liked Math, I've always hated it actually. Which makes you wonder why I took up physics when I transferred here, huh?"
Donghae looks at him, quietly rubbing at his wrist. "And why? Why do you love literature so much?"
Hyukjae laughs, and Donghae can see his gums clearly. "Well, it's the opposite of you. I love literature because it's abstract. There's never only one answer, and there's so much room for exploration. I always hated being confined to rules since young. I guess that's partly why."
Donghae nods, leaning against the tree trunk again.
"So... I guess we're rather different, huh?" Hyukjae now starts to bite into his own sandwich.
"Yeah," Donghae murmurs. "I guess we are."
They continue with the game for awhile more. Donghae find out that Hyukjae likes to dance, and Hyukjae finds out that Donghae likes to sing. And then the bell rings, and it's time for Donghae to go for his math class and Hyukjae, literature.
-
The two continue their daily lunches, and they sit under the same tree, with Donghae eating his sandwich - wholemeal bread, with two tomatoes, two slices of ham and 3 pieces of lettuce.
Meanwhile Hyukjae chooses to eat a random burger he buys from the school cafeteria in his rush to meet Donghae, with the exception of him stealing a few bites from Donghae's sandwich now and then.
They talk about everything, from formulas to light rays to literary techniques.
Hyukjae doesn't care if he doesn't understand what Donghae is saying most of the time.
The only thing he notices is the way Donghae's eyes light up whenever he talks, and Hyukjae thinks those eyes are more beautiful than the countless poems he's read.
50 days: 3 hours: 10 minutes: 42 seconds
-
"It's beautiful, isn't it?"
"Five times per minute." Donghae suddenly mumbles.
"Hmm?"
"The waves," Donghae murmurs. "They crash against the shore five times per minute.
"And?" Hyukjae isn't quite sure of what to say.
"So if you take that and multiply it by sixty, you could find the rate at which-"
"Donghae." Hyukjae interjects, an incredulous look on his face.
"I brought you here to enjoy the scenery, not to do-" Hyukjae gestures wildly. "-mathematics."
"Hmm." Is Donghae's only response, and Hyukjae shakes his head, yet he has a gentle smile on his face.
-
Hyukjae finds Donghae curled up against a locker one day, after his soccer practice. He bends down, only to have his eyes widen as he sees the bruises covering Donghae's face and the faint scratches on his arm.
As Hyukjae places his hand gently on Donghae's shoulder, he bites his lips when he sees Donghae flinch.
"H-Hyukjae?"
"Donghae," Hyukjae utters, feeling anger and worry rushing through him.
Donghae only shakes his head, standing up and feeling his legs collapse, only to have Hyukjae wrap his arms around his waist in order for him to stand up straight.
"I managed to protect it." Donghae mumbles to himself, and Hyukjae is quite confused, until he sees that a Mathematics guide, slightly torn, is tightly held in Donghae's arms.
-
Donghae realises that around Hyukjae, the timer doesn't itch, nor does it hurt.
He's examining it while waiting for Hyukjae to come eat with him, and he nearly jumps up when Hyukjae suddenly sits next to him. He quickly pulls his sleeve down.
"What were you looking at?" Hyukjae asks curiously, biting into his burger.
"Ah, nothing." Donghae manages to say, and he lets out a breath when Hyukjae only shrugs, taking huge bites of his burger.
"You should really stop eating these burgers."
Hyukjae looks up, and Donghae thinks he looks quite adorable, with cheese stains around his mouth.
"But they taste so good." Hyukjae says, his lips. "Much better than your sandwiches I bet."
Donghae's eyes widen at that, and he opens his mouth to retort, but Hyukjae is faster.
"Maybe you should make me one then, to prove me wrong."
"Maybe I should." Hyukjae turns to face Donghae, only to find him sulking and he has to hold himself back from laughing.
"All right, all right." Hyukjae leans over to pat Donghae's arm, and Donghae thinks he can feel Hyukjae's breath on his cheek. "I won't tease you about your sandwiches anymore."
"Come on, let's go!"
Donghae can't really move for a second, because he's still overwhelmed from the warm sensation he felt at his wrist at the close contact with Hyukjae earlier on.
He looks down at his unfinished sandwich- oh, how he hates wasting food- but he takes another look at Hyukjae's hand, and he chucks the sandwich into the nearest dustbin, taking Hyukjae's hand.
43 days: 1 hour: 10 minutes: 12 seconds
The next day, Donghae throws a brown paper bag at Hyukjae. Hyukjae grins when he opens it. Wholemeal bread - with two tomatoes, two slices of ham and 3 pieces of lettuce.
-
"Come on!"
"No." Donghae replies, pencil scratching furiously against the rough paper.
"Come on, they're really nice. Please?" Donghae looks up to see Hyukjae pouting and he feels his wrist throb just so slightly.
"I said no- Ow!" Donghae winces, grabbing at his wrist.
Hyukjae leans forward worriedly. "You okay?"
"Yeah," Donghae murmurs. "Yeah."
"So will you go, or not?" Hyukjae crosses his arms, leaning against the door.
Donghae takes one look at his unfinished math assignment, and wearily starts to stuff his papers inside his bag.
The moment they enter the fast food joint, Hyukjae notices the wide-eyed expression on Donghae's face as he scans the menu.
"Um, Donghae... Have you never been here before?"
Donghae snaps out of his trance.
"Actually," he scratches the back of his head. "I've never eaten fast food before."
"What? Why?" Hyukjae's eyes widen, rather dramatically.
"It looks so oily, and doesn't fit into the criteria I set for my food."
Hyukjae sighs.
"Hi Donghae!" A wide eyed boy waves frantically to him.
"Uh, hi?"
"Donghae, the short one is Ryeowook. The taller one is Kyuhyun."
"Hey!" As Ryeowook lunges towards Hyukjae, Donghae is already mentally storing the two names into the back of his mind.
"So, um. Donghae." Kyuhyun coughs, trying to make conversation after Hyukjae steps on his toe.
"What course do you take?"
"I'm a science student." Donghae mumbles, and he bites his lip, staring awkwardly at Kyuhyun. Somehow, the words that come out so naturally when he talks to Hyukjae don't seem to be coming out now.
"Ah." Kyuhyun mutters, and then proceeds to stuff a bunch of fries into his mouth. Ryeowook shrieks in disgust when Kyuhyun tries to say something, only to have a bunch of fries spew out into the tray in front of him.
That makes Donghae look down to his own fries. He examines it rather carefully.
"Hey, what's wrong?" Hyukjae nudges Donghae, already chomping down on his cheese burger.
"Uh." Donghae says, and he goes back to staring blankly at his fries.
"Do you," Hyukjae tries to form a proper question. "Not know how to eat them?"
Donghae only looks at him, an awkward expression on his face.
Hyukjae only chuckles, taking Donghae's hand in his, and guiding his hand towards the fries.
"Here, you take one of it, then dip it into this sauce. Easy, right?"
None of the information seems to be processing in Donghae's mind, the only thing he can see is Hyukjae's hands that are around his own.
"What if it's not good?"
Hyukjae smiles, and Donghae feels it again. That gentle throb in his wrist.
"You'll never know if you never try."
39 days: 4 hours: 5 minutes: 1 second
-
Hyukjae's not surprised when he takes Donghae to an amusement park and Donghae says he's never been to one before.
And he continues to take him to places, to explore new worlds.
There's a stack of undone homework on Donghae's table for the first time and as it gets higher and higher, Donghae's heart only gets fuller and fuller.
There's never a boring day with Hyukjae around. Sure, Donghae still obsesses over math equations and linear graphs but Hyukjae is always there to bring him into the world of the abstract, a world Donghae would have never imagined entering before.
Hyukjae makes Donghae see that there is so much more than the little bubble he's surrounded himself with, and he makes Donghae realise that there are endless possibilities.
Whenever Donghae looks at something, he calculates the feasibility of it working, the probability it will fail. Hyukjae drags Donghae to try everything, whether he thinks it will work or not.
Donghae's world isn't just about straight lines, single answers and equations that can be solved within a minute anymore.
No, it's so much more. Hyukjae lets him witness the beauty life can bring.
And actually, Donghae doesn't find it that bad at all.
-
Donghae heads towards his math class, his mind conjuring equations and formulas and he calculates the probability that the straps of his bag would break.
In the midst of the calculations, he feels himself being slammed against a hard surface. He closes his eyes, reaching into his pocket. As usual, he feels the harsh blows onto his face and he feels the red trickle down the side of his face. He takes a deep breath, backing himself against the lockers, trying to avoid the blows but only getting harsher ones. He feels his world swirling, and he sees shades of black and gray. He feels hands reaching into his pocket for his wallet and just at that moment, he feels the hands getting shoved off him. He barely manages to open his eyes before he sees Shindong getting shoved to the ground.
He struggles to keep his eyes open and when he does, he sees him.
"H-Hyukjae..." Hyukjae continues to punch Shindong, ignoring the latter's groans of pain.
"H-Hyukjae!" Hyukjae's eyes widen, and he lets go of the bloodied collar.
"Hae," Hyukjae whispers. "Hae!" He rushes over to Donghae's side, cradling him in his arms.
"I'm sorry," Hyukjae mumbles, Donghae's hair. "I'm so sorry..."
Donghae smiles, feeling himself giving in to the darkness that's calling out to him, and he lets himself fall into the warmth that surrounds him.
-
Days pass. Hyukjae doesn't let Donghae out of his sight, and he drags him everywhere. Donghae finds himself unconsciously smiling at times, and he finds himself talking more often. Whenever he doesn't know what to do, he looks at Hyukjae and with that reassuring nod, he has the strength to continue on.
He finds the thoughts of light rays being replaced by the thoughts of a certain brown haired boy.
Donghae looks up sleepily from his math textbook when he hears the buzzing of his phone. He hadn't even realized he had fallen asleep. It's the first time in awhile he's actually fallen asleep while working on his math sums. After all, he had spent the whole night texting Hyukjae, bantering about whether the Pythagorus theorem applied to daily life.
His phone screen lights up again. He slides the phone lazily towards him, but he smiles when he sees the familiar name.
One message from Idiot dancer.
Donghae!!!!
What. I'm working on my math.
Since when are you not.
Well, okay. What do you want?
Come with me to Sungmin's party tomorrow.
But I'm not even invited.
Sungmin says I can bring someone along. So come!
I think I'd rather not.
Why, Donghae?
I don't want to see those stares people give me.
Stop it Donghae. No one will stare at you when you're with me.
Donghae flushes, and he can almost hear Hyukjae's stern voice.
Oh, all right.
Great, see you tomorrow!! :)
Donghae takes a deep breath, looking at himself in the mirror. He thinks he looks kind of different, with the gel and eyeliner Heechul forced him to put on after hearing that his baby brother was going to a party after so long. He had refused to let Donghae wear his glasses as well.
He hears the revving of a car engine outside, and he knows that it's Hyukjae. It's exactly 7pm, and Donghae is pleased that Hyukjae is on time. Once Heechul closes the door, he takes out his glasses from his pocket and puts them on again.
Hyukjae can feel how tense Donghae is on the way to Sungmin's house and he pats Donghae's hand comfortingly.
"Don't worry too much, okay?"
Donghae only nods, grimacing as he feels the weird stinging in his wrist again.
As he enters Sungmin's house, Donghae cringes at the loud music blasting and the screams of the girls as Jungsoo dances in the middle. The only thing he feels like doing is getting out, but all thoughts disappear when he feels Hyukjae's comforting grip around his shoulders.
They talk for awhile, in a quiet corner. But soon, Hyukjae is pulled away to dance by Siwon, and Donghae is forced to grab a cup of fruit punch and he sits quietly by the side.
"Hey." Donghae cringes at the familiar voice.
"I see goody-two-shoes is enjoying himself, huh?" Donghae turns away, sipping on his fruit punch nervously.
"I'm talking to you!" Shindong shouts, gripping onto Donghae's neck, causing the cup to fall out of Donghae's hands, spilling all over the floor.
"Let go of me." Donghae says quietly, tears forming in his eyes.
"What if I say no?" Shindong taunts, his grip around Donghae's neck tightening.
"I believe he told you to let go." Donghae feels the grip on his neck slackening as he hears the familiar footsteps getting closer. But it then tightens again.
"Why should I listen to what a like him says?"
With that, Hyukjae growls before launching his fist towards Shindong's face. Donghae falls to the floor and he scrambles to one side, shaking. He watches nervously as the two swing at each other, feeling his wrist throb. At one point, Shindong hurls his fist exceptionally hard towards Hyukjae's face and Hyukjae's nose starts to bleed. As they continue to fight, Hyukjae feels blood trickling down the side of his face.
By this point, Donghae is clutching onto his wrist, which is burning in excruciating pain. He immediately scrambles towards the two of them, suddenly regaining his ability to move again.
"Hyukjae, stop! Please!" Hyukjae seems to be in a trance, swinging his fist towards Shindong furiously.
"Please!" Donghae begs, tears streaming down his cheeks, with his hands wrapped tightly around Hyukjae's waist.
Hyukjae looks down at the crying Donghae and pushes Shindong to the ground.
"Never. Never touch him again." He snarls, and he grips Donghae's wrist, pulling him out of the place.
Hyukjae doesn't manage to pull Donghae very far before Donghae slumps to the floor, feeling his legs weakening.
"Hey, you all right?" Hyukjae whispers, worriedly pushing Donghae's sweaty fringe out of the way.
Donghae sobs at this, wrapping his arms tightly around Hyukjae's neck.
"You idiot." Donghae whispers, and Hyukjae feels the moistness against his neck. "You're the one injured."
"Hey," Hyukjae whispers. "Hey, look. I'm fine." Donghae looks up, only to see more blood trickling down the side of Hyukjae's face. This time, his wrist throbs so violently he feels like throwing up. He turns around, pulling up the sleeve of his leather jacket, only to find the timer bright red, pulsing violently and painfully against his skin.
"Hey, are you all right?" Hyukjae turns Donghae around.
"Yeah," Donghae pants, pulling down his sleeve again. "I'm fine."
Hyukjae's eyes narrow when he sees the pained expression on Donghae's face and the tight grip around his wrist.
30 days: 14 hours: 3 minutes: 0 seconds
-
It's a windy evening, and Donghae sits on the swing with a math paper in his hands. He fills in the sums quietly, enjoying the cooling breeze against his cheeks.
A moment later, he hears footsteps and he looks up, smiling softly. Hyukjae waves at him, showing the cups of bubble tea he's bought for them. Donghae only looks back down at his paper, and he hears the footsteps getting closer. At that moment, he feels an excruciating pain on his wrist, similar to the one he felt that day at Sungmin's party. He falls to the ground, his pen falling out of his hands. As he looks up, hands trembling, he sees that Hyukjae is trying to stand up, a deep cut on his left knee. Hyukjae brushes at his knees, only to widen his eyes when he sees Donghae on the floor, shaking.
"Hae, what's wrong?" Hyukjae places his hands on Donghae's shoulders, looking into the latter's blank eyes. After awhile, Donghae seems to snap back into reality.
"H-Hyukjae," Donghae murmurs. "Hyukjae, a-are you okay?"
Hyukjae's eyebrows furrow and he softly says," I'm fine, Hae. I just tripped and got a cut. What's wrong?"
Donghae only closes his eyes, letting himself fall against Hyukjae's chest and Hyukjae then feels how badly Donghae is shaking. It is then, when Hyukjae looks down, and sees the tight grip that Donghae has on his wrist. He reaches out for it, but Donghae hastily slaps his hands away.
Hyukjae's eyes widen and he tugs at Donghae's sleeve. Donghae thrashes against the tight grip.
"Let me see! What's wrong, Donghae?"
Donghae lets out a strangled sob when Hyukjae folds his sleeve. The numbers are there, flashing bright red, throbbing violently against his pale skin. Hyukjae lets go of Donghae's wrist, eyes widening. He hears Donghae sobbing and he looks up, shocked to see tears trickling down Donghae's cheeks relentlessly.
"Hae..." Hyukjae reaches out, wanting to wipe those precious tears away.
"Don't touch me," Donghae sobs. "You must think of me as a freak now." He buries his face into his palms, and then violently scratches at the markings on his wrist. Hyukjae lunges forward, grabbing Donghae tightly in his arms, holding him against his chest until the boy stops thrashing.
"No, Donghae." Hyukjae murmurs gently, wiping away the tears from the pale cheeks. "I don't see you as a freak."
Donghae looks at him, hands curling around the other's shirt tightly.
"I love you, Donghae." Donghae looks up, a blush spreading furiously across his face.
"I love you." Donghae sees sincerity in Hyukjae's eyes, but he also sees sadness. All his thoughts are washed away when Hyukjae cups his face gently.
As Hyukjae leans in, Donghae feels his heartbeat quickening, and he feels the warmth that surrounds his wrist.
-
Time always passes quickly, even more so when you are surrounded by your loved ones. And so, time passes quickly for the two of them.
Donghae, the math geek can be seen hanging out with Hyukjae in school, a bright smile on his face as he lets himself get dragged around. Donghae, the math geek can be seen eating cheeseburgers and fries, mostly due to Hyukjae forcefully feeding him. Donghae, the math geek, is finally happy.
All seems well, but all can never truly be well.
One day, as the pair are headed to Donghae's house for a baking session, Hyukjae collapses. Donghae panics so badly until he cries, and he uses all his strength to carry Hyukjae into his house. When he places Hyukjae onto his bed, he winces as he grips onto his throbbing wrist.
He looks at Hyukjae who is lying motionlessly on the bed, and he sinks to the floor, rubbing furiously at his wrist.
-
Hyukjae begins to collapse more and more often, and Donghae begs Hyukjae to go to the hospital but the latter simply refuses. Whenever Hyukjae wakes up, he seems to be as energetic as before, but Donghae can see the thinning jawline and the paleness.
At times, Donghae catches Hyukjae looking at the numbers on his wrist, tracing them with a faraway look in his eyes. Donghae looks into Hyukjae eyes, but Hyukjae only looks away, refusing to say anything.
However, there is always a breaking point. And that point comes, when Donghae cries so badly, hitting Hyukjae on the chest, begging him to tell him about what exactly is going on.
Hyukjae only wipes away the tears, and gently takes Donghae's hand.
-
Donghae looks around curiously when he finds that he's never seen this place before. Hyukjae senses his discomfort and only tightens his grip on his hand. He continues to pull Donghae, and Donghae realises that Hyukjae has brought him to a small shopping area tucked away in a remote part of the city.
They sit down at a table of a cafe, and Donghae looks at Hyukjae. Hyukjae's eyes have that sadness again, that look where he seems to be drifting between reality and dream.
"Look around you, Donghae." Hyukjae murmurs. Donghae lifts his head up, feeling Hyukjae curl his fingers around his own.
Donghae gasps as he finally sees what is around him. He sees red markings. Red markings on people. Those timers, above people's heads, imprinted on their shoulders, their hands, their legs. There are timers, but there are words as well, and there are brightly colored single digits. Most people are different, but some are the same.
Donghae turns to Hyukjae, and Hyukjae smiles.
"They're just like us, Donghae." Hyukjae silently begins to his shirt.
"Just... like us?" And Donghae cannot believe his eyes when he sees red lines on Hyukjae's chest.
"H-Hyukjae?"
"Numbers, time. They're what my life has revolved around. Few people have this, Hae. Different people have different numbers, different destinies. This place, is one where people with numbers that determine their lives come to. They come here to seek solace in others who have the same destinies as them." Donghae feels a gentle press against his hand and realises he's kept silent for too long. He opens his mouth to say something, but his lips tremble when he realises something.
Donghae realises, those numbers on Hyukjae's chest... Those numbers... they match the ones on his wrist. And he sees that the red markings on Hyukjae's chest are not only numbers like his. He sees words.
And at that moment, the clock strikes twelve, and there is a loud bong around the area. He watches the words on Hyukjae's chest flicker, and he sees the ones on his wrist flicker too.
Tears trickle down both of their cheeks.
Time to death: 20 days
-
This time, it is Donghae who takes Hyukjae to places. He takes Hyukjae to where he won his first math competition, to his old childhood snack store, to his father's grave. He falls to the ground, pulling Hyukjae down with him.
"Appa... It's me," As he feels Hyukjae taking him into his arms, he starts to sob. "You don't need to worry anymore, Appa. I've finally found him. The solution to my equation, just like how Umma was yours. And he's going to stay with me forever, no matter what destiny has decided for us." Hearing this, Hyukjae hugs Donghae even tighter, feeling his heart clench painfully.
Soon, Hyukjae becomes weaker and weaker, and Donghae dedicates his time to taking care of him, neglecting his equations and formulas. On a particular day, Donghae rushes home from school after his wrist hurts so badly, he knows something is terribly wrong. He goes home to find Hyukjae half conscious in the bathroom. He knows... He knows, that time is running out.
-
"Did you ever regret?" Donghae asks one day when they're both lying on Hyukjae's small hospital bed, hands intertwined.
"Regret what?" Hyukjae asks, smoothing Donghae's messy hair.
"Did you ever regret meeting me?" Hyukjae only chuckles, and Donghae frowns.
"Stupid. Idiot. The only thing I regret is not meeting you earlier."
10 days: 4 hours: 26 minutes: 3 seconds
-
"Here," Donghae says, ing a crumpled piece of paper into Hyukjae's hands. Hyukjae looks up from his iPad, unfolding the piece of paper. It's a poem, titled "To, Hyukjae."
"You wrote it for me?"
"Yeah. Memorized the literary devices to use and the formatting." Donghae pauses. "There's something additional though."
"Hmm?" Hyukjae asks, hands gently caressing Donghae's cheeks.
"Feelings," Donghae places his hand around Hyukjae's. "You taught me how to feel again. S-So I put it into the poem."
Hyukjae smiles so widely, and Donghae lunges forward to hug him, ignoring the fact that he's all tangled up among the wires.
-
Bad idea. Hyukjae thinks. It was an extremely bad idea to agree to watching The Fault In Our Stars with Donghae. Donghae cries uncontrollably in Hyukjae's arms, and when they reach the scene where Hazel cries over Augustus's death, Donghae breaks down.
Hyukjae calms him down by placing a kiss on Donghae's lips, gently tracing the tired lines on his face.
"Sorry," Hyukjae says sadly. "For making you so tired."
Donghae only shakes his head, hand gripping tightly onto Hyukjae's.
"Never say that again." Donghae says firmly, pressing a kiss on Hyukjae's pale cheek.
-
Some days, Donghae looks up at the sky and he visualizes what it would be like if the sky were green, or red, or pink. He tries to imagine looking at the sky with Hyukjae, hand in hand when they're in their eighties. He sees nothing but a blue sky. Hyukjae is not there beside him.
Soon, Hyukjae can't really talk anymore. Doctors don't know what's wrong with Hyukjae, even having tried multiple tests. They both know. It is just that one does not want to accept. And as the numbers on his wrist become more glaring, more painful. He realises... And he accepts. The doctors stop coming to take blood tests, and the nurses don't come around as much anymore.
"Say ah!" Donghae says, trying so hard not to cry as he watches Hyukjae struggling to even open his mouth to take a bite. He feeds him the porridge with trembling hands and as Hyukjae finishes, he sets down the bowl, standing up as he feels tears welling up in his eyes.
He stops, breath hitching as he feels a gentle, but firm grip on his wrist. He looks down to see a sad but pleading expression on Hyukjae's face.
Stay.
-
Donghae reads to Hyukjae. He reads to Hyukjae his favourite poems till he can recite them by heart, he plays their favourite Disney classics and he squeals when Cinderella rides off with her prince, helping Hyukjae to express the excitement he is unable to show. Hyukjae smiles, silently holding Donghae's hand.
When Donghae wipes Hyukjae down, their gazes both trail to the red marking on the latter's chest. Donghae only smiles and quickly buttons up his shirt.
"It's all right," he says, smoothening Hyukjae's checkered shirt. "It's all going to be fine."
-
"It's too cruel..." Donghae cries against Hyukjae's chest while Hyukjae silently his hair, this position becoming a normal thing for them.
"It's too cruel.. bringing you to me and taking you away just like that."
Hyukjae shakes his head, pressing a kiss on Donghae's forehead.
Destiny was kind in letting us meet, Hae. Even if it was just for a short while, even if our paths will cross and never meet again...
Donghae feels the gentle thudding of Hyukjae's chest lulling him to sleep.
I knew my time was up, but I couldn't help it. You were too beautiful, I just had to talk to you. Who would have known that I would have found you, Hae?
Hyukjae looks down when he hears a snore, to find Donghae sound asleep.
Thank you for everything, Hae.
-
"Look, Hyukjae." The said man turns from the window he is gazing out of, trying his best to form a smile when he sees Donghae standing in front of him.
Donghae places a piece of paper into his hands. He sees names, and dates, and he remembers those times Donghae would sit in school with multiple papers in his hands, solving multiple math equations, and how he would sit right beside Donghae, writing his literature essay.
He looks down at the paper again.
King's College, London.
Hyukjae feels tears streaming down his face and although he can't wipe them away, he feels those familiar hands against his cheeks.
"I made it, Hyukjae."
-
Donghae looks at his wrist. One minute more.
Everything is a blur, probably because of his tear filled eyes. He hastily wipes them away, he has to see Hyukjae clearly.
As the red markings make their final ticks, he sees it all fading away. He leans down to press a final kiss, and he smiles sadly when he feels a small response.
"I...l-ove... y-you..." Tears stream down Donghae's face.
Those eyes look at him, with so much sincerity and love.
"I love you too. So much... So, so much..."
That mouth, that kissed him, that comforted him, that loved him.
That man... His soulmate.
The timer blinks for the final time.
Donghae looks away.
-
Donghae looks around at his near empty room, wiping his hands after he stacks the last box onto the rest of the pile. Just as he is about to leave the room, he remembers he hasn't checked the bottom most drawer.
There is a yellow piece of paper with words hastily scribbled, some smudged.
Since young, I had been counting down to the day I would die. But everything changed when I met you, Donghae. I gained courage and hope. I found my solace in you. I believed that I could live, for you. So I have no regrets anymore, Donghae. I hope that I added colours into your life, Hae. Don't see your world in just black and white anymore. You're so much more than that, you deserve so much more. I'm sorry I couldn't spend the rest of my life colouring yours. I'll miss your sandwiches, the cheeseburgers, and seeing your crooked teeth when you smile. But it's okay. I'll still watch over you. I remember you telling me light rays are beautiful things. Something about reflection? I don't know, I was never as good as you in Physics. So, continue to find light in your life, Hae. Don't ever give up. See you, Hae. Continue filling your life with colours, okay? I love you, Hae. I really do.
-
This is the story of Lee Donghae, the math geek.
And this is the story of how the dancer, Lee Hyukjae, changed his life.
There's a saying that soulmates are connected even through these numbers of fate. In the pair, one will have a number that counts down to his own death. The other will have a timer that counts down to the time his soulmate dies. When the numbers match, the soulmates are found. Why? Why death? Because time is cruel. Even soulmates bound by destiny can never escape the clutches of time. Time wraps it's ticking hands around numbers, twisting, turning. Till all is gone...
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