The next morning, Yibo was the first one wake up, his eyelids heavy against his tired eyes. The cat let his senses slowly come to life, his nose sniffing at the covers that were against his skin, the scent of nothing but cotton invading his nose. It made his heart sink further into his chest, since it no longer smelt of the two other males who lived with him. He didn't notice the sheets were newer, and he didn't know when they were changed. Sighing, he moved on to feel. He felt the soft fabric between his fingers, tightening his grip to watch the little crumpled lines appear, then he smoothed it out as if nothing happened. He wished his life may be like this, or rather his own body. He wished he could be crumpled like a piece of paper and then flattened out into perfection again, though he would never be able to hide anymore. Sitting up, his blurry eyes focused on the white walls around him. He liked the color, it reminded him of white flowers, pure. Yibo found himself smiling in irony, his favored color even represented something he threw away. Purity was something that was now foreign to him, and he didn't entirely hate it.  Rubbing his closed eyes with his fists, he eventually found the strength in himself to stand up. The moment his bare feet touched the floor, a gentle shiver ran through his body and he made a soft noise. He was cold, from the inside out. Yibo moved toward a mirror, tilting his head back to inspect his skin like he always did. Though these days he needed to be a bit more careful, he needed to cover himself much more, and make sure no marks were shown. His skin was always carelessly littered with bruises and love-bites, he hated that, hiding it because he knew what he was doing was so ed up. Tousling his hair away from his eyes, he ran his fingers down his pale skin, deciding today he would try to smile. He hadn't smiled much, so he knew the solution, he knew what would make him smile, or rather who.

When he had changed into sweatpants that were comfy and a plain white shirt, he ran down the stairs to get something to eat. That's something he knew as soon as he woke up, that the knot in his stomach was from the lack of food he had consumed in the past four days. Suddenly eating didn't matter to him. The only things important to Yibo anymore were affection, hiding, feeling and attention. How he loved attention, from anyone and everyone. If he didn't have any, he'd become sad. Shame, he was such a brat. By the time he had walked to the last stair, he saw the person he always wanted. Seungyoun was standing there, drinking the last of a cold glass of water. He watched quietly, as the others head tilted back to drink the rest of it. His neck was glorious, Yibo always thought it would be a nice place to place fluttering butterfly kisses. When Seungyoun took a small breath and set the glass down. the cats ears twitched upward and he took a few steps toward him. Of course he was thinking, it may seem like he wasn't, but he was. Wrapping his arms around the others waist, he pressed himself against his back shamelessly and closed his eyes. A purr left Yibo as he nuzzled into the others shoulder. Yibo loved Seungyoun very much, even if he didn't want to be touched by someone as impure as him, he still wanted his touch.

"Seungyounnie." The blonde boy started, his eyes opening lazily to look at the others side profile. He didn't look too bothered, which mean it was a green light. He leaned closer and hid his face in the nape of his neck. He never wanted to let of Seungyoun, even if Seungyoun didn't hold him back, this was enough for him. "I miss you, I'm so glad you came out of your room. Now we can always be together, right?" It was sort of strange, to the high school student. His eyes stared down at the counter top, at the glass he had just put down. Now they could be together huh? Seungyoun wasn't sure that would ever be possible, his chest tightened, and he nodded. He was so out of it, because he never expected Yibo to say this. He never expected this to happen. Both of them were not themselves. 

"Yibo, I need you to be honest with me." He turned around in his arms, his own coming to wrap around the small of his back. Yibo let out a hushed gasp, his skin flushing a soft pink at how close they were. Sure he had kissed plenty of times, he had kissed Sungjoo more times than he could be bothered to count, but just being this close with no romantic tie made his heart race. But it dropped again, because he knew he screwed up the chance with Seungyoun. "Sungjoo, is treating you well right? He's not being mean, or doing anything without permission?" Seungyoun's tone was low, like music to Yibo's ears. His eyes closed shyly, and he bit at his bottom lip. He suddenly had thing for the pouring concern in his voice, and it made his body warm. He wanted this, he wanted to be cared for, and not thrown around like a doll to be picked up and dropped when bored.

"He's not mean..." Yibo felt the need to defend the man, the man who taught him it was okay to cry. He needed to defend Sungjoo because he gave him pretty things, he called him pretty and he cooked him pretty food. He liked him, he liked him because he created a false sense of security around him. Yibo was a fool, he was a fool to think when Sungjoo said he loved him that he actually loved Yibo and not his body. "I gave him permission Seungyounnie, I gave him permission to do whatever, just wasn't aware that meant tearing my heart into pieces as our connection grew stronger." He didn't know why he was telling Seungyoun, but he had to tell someone, and he'd tell this boy anything.

"What do you mean to say Yibo?" He swallowed the dryness in his throat, staring into the eyes of the cat. They grew teary, and he smiled. Reassurance, he needed it. Yibo wanted Seungyoun to tell him it was okay and that he'd always stay beside him. But no, Yibo was a liar, a liar who was not pure and was not worthy to be in love with him.

"Sungjoo. He made me lo-" His voice cracked, and he shook his head, burying himself into his chest now, holding back sobs though his shoulders shook. No, he didn't love Sungjoo.

"You love him?" Seungyoun said simply, his voice numb like his body. What was he supposed to say now? His whole world played in his mind, but backward, and he thought of that one dream he had. Where there were flowers and he was kissing Yibo, at the time it was crazy idea, but suddenly it didn't seem that crazy.

"No, no. Seungyounnie I don't love him." There was a thick silence, as he raised his head, looking up at Seungyoun through his tear-filled eyes. Seungyoun didn't want to admit it, but he was pretty even when he cried. And he shouldn't be thinking about how he looked, but how he felt. So he dug deeper. He didn't know if it was fear he saw reflecting in his eyes, or was it really just unbearable sadness. When he looked further he noticed it was neither, it was admiration. Yibo was looking at Seungyoun like he was the best thing in the world, and was golden for just existing. When Yibo raised a hand and placed it on the others cheek, neither of them dared to breath. Yibo's thumb gently ran over Seungyoun's lips. They were soft, and he wanted to know what they really felt like. He liked how they looked when he spoke, even better when he smiled, or when he was concentrating and he bit at them. Yibo paid better attention to him than he should have, but he didn't regret it. There was no time to regret.

"Then tell me what it is I'm feeling right now." Seungyoun muttered, a hand reaching up to take Yibo's in his own. And when Yibo looked at their fingers intertwining, he knew what he should say. So he did say it.

"I only love you, Seungyounnie."

The space between them was sealed, as it was the student who pressed his lips against the blonde boys. And he couldn't be happier with the spark he felt between their skin. Yibo couldn't help it, and now the hot tears falling from his eyes were ones of happiness. Because Seungyoun was the only one who gave him attention without him asking, and he loved it. He loved him.

-

a/n : what if i just ended the story here?

xD would you be mad at author-nim??

I would be mad at myself omg.

anyways.

sorry it took soooo many days. I was so busy this week, and recently has a episode that ended with me crying in a bathtub ;;;;;;

hehehe. oops??? i'm okay now!

sort of??

but let's enjoy this shall we?

comment and all c: 

what characters do you ship in this story? why? just cause I want to interact u v u heh.

ily < 333 have a good day, or night or afternoon. whenever you decide to read this.