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Listen.Sorry
Sorry was definitely the most frequently used word in Jimin's vocabulary. A boy with a great heart, destined with a not so great life. He was one to apologize for every mistake he made and even, for those he didn't. ' She lost too much blood ', they said but the truth behind the cause of his mother's death was a fatal mistake made by the doctor after delivering Jimin. However, his father blamed him for his mother's death and all his life, Jimin lived with the guilt of what wasn't a fault of his. His father became an alcoholic, came home every night with a different woman. Those women who Jimin would have to apologize to in the morning when his dad has left the house and the women are left confused and furious. He tries to explain, make up an excuse for his father's absence but every single time, he gets cut off. So he listens, accept the scoldings left for his father and apologizes.
A new beginning
He met Yoongi when they both were in college, a match made in heaven, soulmates as people would say. Jimin thought that his life would finally have a new beginning, a better one and it was until a few years later.
Yoongi and Jimin both moved in together in to a small but cosy apartment in the centre of Seoul. Jimin doesn't remember when but Yoongi started coming home drunk after work. At first, it was once or twice a month. Then, it became more frequent, Yoongi would come home drunk at least once a week and not too long after, it became a daily thing. He would come home and trash the house, spitting out incoherent and harsh words towards Jimin for such petty reasons. Jimin would try to explain, try to calm his lover down but as usual, he gets cut off in the middle of his sentence. It scared Jimin that Yoongi became like the person he so desperately tried to forget. His father.
Listen
" What the fck is this?! I wanted kimchi fried rice, not this ! Am I a dog?! You son of a btch! "
" But hyung, - "
" Don't talk back to me, you little fcker! "
" I - I'm sorry, hyung "
But hyung, you didn't tell me you wanted fried rice. If you had told me, I would've made it for you earlier. And I'm not the best at cooking but I always try my best for you, hyung. I'm sorry.
" Why are there fcking vodka bottles on my bed?! "
" You brought them there last night, hyung "
" Well, your stupid should've known better than to not clean them up! How the fck am I supposed to fcking sleep?! "
" But hyung, - "
" You've learnt how to talk back now huh?! "
" Sorry, hyung "
But hyung, I'm not allowed in your room. If I was, I would've cleaned everything up. Sorry, hyung.
" Are those lipstick stains on your shirt?! Are you cheating on me, hyung? "
" What? Don't tell me you weren't expecting this. Why would I stay loyal to a useless, piece of like you when I have a beautiful secretary waiting for me after work? "
" But, hyung! You said - "
" Little baby learned how to speak up now, didn't he. " Yoongi approaches Jimin slowly with an unreadable look on his face. Jimin felt threatened, he's been beaten before, bruises and cuts still yet to heal all over his body. Who knows what Yoongi would do to him this time.
" I'm so sorry, hyung. Please don't hurt me "
" It's good that you know your place " Yoongi says with a smirk Jimin wished he could erase and he just leaves. Leaves Jimin on the floor, vulnerable and in a mess.
But hyung, you said you loved me. You told me we were going to adopt kids one day and you'd be a good father. You promised. You promised me so many things, hyung but if you can't keep them, I'll spare you the trouble and leave. I'll leave and I'll let you be happy. I'm so sorry, hyung. Please don't hurt me anymore.
The ' End '
The next morning, Yoongi gets up to look for Jimin after calling out his name repeatedly and not getting the usual " Yes, hyung? " back.
He was ready to get angry, ready to lose his voice, yelling. But when he saw the latter on the floor of the living room; exactly where he was left last night, all the anger just drained out of him. There was a pillow over Jimin's face and Yoongi comes closer and takes it off. Jimin felt cold, lifeless, his body limp. Yoongi panics and tries to look for a pulse but nothing. He doesn't know why but he cries, Yoongi cries and shouts for help when there is no help. But even when he knows so, he cradles Jimin's delicate body in his arms and cries till there are no more tears left. Because he's so mad, mad at himself for letting this happen.
A note
There was something laying beside Jimin that went unnoticed the first time, a note. A piece of paper torn out from the phone book, words on it written messily.
" I'm sorry you always had to yell at me. I'm sorry I tried to talk back. I'm sorry I always wanted you to listen. I'm sorry I was never good enough for you. I'm sorry I made you pretend to love me. But hyung, now, you don't have to anymore. I love you, hyung. I always have. "
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