Ryeowook,

Hi, how are you? For starters, I hope you're doing well. You're taking good care of yourself, right? Eat and sleep properly. Don’t get sick! 

Okay... I don't exactly know how I am supposed to express everything in just a number of simple words, but I'll do my best.

Okay, here we go... 

Well, hello again... It's been almost four years, hasn't it? Four years since I came to notice you. Four years since I came to like you. Four years since I fell in love with you.

On the 30th of October, on the year 2010, I came across your beautiful smile, that charmingly beautiful smile of yours. I was captivated by how your lips curved upward in a shy grin. How high and rosy your cheekbones were whenever you laugh. How your eyes sparkled brightly against the light. You were breathtakingly gorgeous. I thought your smile was the most beautiful thing about you, but surprisingly, I stood corrected... When I heard your voice while singing that song, I felt my heart skip a beat. My world stopped turning when I heard your melodious voice ringing through my ears. I immediately closed my eyes and savored every note you sang. And that was when you captured me... You swept me off my feet, baby. You trapped me under your spell of love. And at that moment, I knew I adored you. I knew, in one way or another, I would definitely fall in love with you, and I did. 

That memorable day started it all. I grew so eager to get to know you more. I went through every detail I could grasp about your life just to see what kind of person you really are. And I have to admit, you are a great man. You're that kind of guy any girl would surely fall for, and I am proud to say that I am one of them. You're thoughtful and caring. You'd rather spend all your energy in taking care of others instead of taking care of yourself. You dedicate every single thing you do to your parents because you love them more than anyone else. You've been working hard from the start, I know. You never gave up despite how hard it is for you. You’ve shed tears, even blood, just for you to get to where you are right now. Keep on chasing your dreams. Music is your passion and the piano is your first love. Keep on doing what you do best, my darling. I'm here to support you and cheer you on. With every decision you make, with every step you take, I will be here for you. I will always have your back, my love.

And one of the many things that fascinated me about you, even until now, is that you never, ever failed to put a smile on my lips whenever you sing; a hearty laughter reverberating through my sense in every joke you made, and a stream of tears in my eyes that would run down my cheeks in every painful moment you go through. I grew to love you more and more of every second of everyday.

I've seen your mistakes and imperfections countless of times. You may not be the best dancer out there, but certainly, you are one of the best singers I have ever known. You may be one of the shortest people out there, but I know you have a heart of a giant. You may look vulnerable and weak most of the time, but I know that’s only a façade. You’re a strong person, my love. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Don’t shy away and hide in that shell of yours. Show them what you’re really made of. Show that heart of steel of yours. Don’t be afraid to just be yourself and let loose. Your weakness is what will make you stronger. Don’t mind your insecurities, because you are beautiful, inside and out. I wish you could see what I see in you. Your flaws are the ones that make you perfect. That’s what makes you a real human being. That's what makes you you. You are priceless to those who love you. You are special. You are treasured. You are indeed precious. You are so dear to me, my baby.

But, do you know what they say about falling in love? They said that no matter how much you love that person, there will always be a tendency of a heartbreak. At some point in time, you will have to get hurt. You must get hurt, mainly because this will make you stronger. Maybe that pain would arouse from quarrels, jealousy and unfaithfulness, breakups, or maybe just not being loved back by that person... The latter, is what I am experiencing with you.

Sometimes, I ask myself why I still love you when you are clearly oblivious and unaware of my existence. Why am I even trying so hard? You will never acknowledge my feelings, anyway. So why? Why am I still truly, madly, deeply in love with you? There are thousands of beautiful girls running after you every single day, so why would you even bother looking towards my way? You don't know me, but I know you. I am just a mere fish in the big blue ocean to you. I only see you, yet you will never spare me a glance. I don't even know if it's possible to get so close to you. I am way out of your league. You are so far away, and it hurts. It really hurts, baby. It makes my heart clench painfully and drop because of the mere fact that you will never love me back. You can never love me back, my love. I hate it. I want you to love me. It hurts so much. But I know… I know that I am not in the right place to hate you. I can't complain about it. You never told me to love you. You never asked me to stay. This was all me. It's always been just me. I hoped, dreamed and cried for you. But then again, who am I to you? I am nothing but a passing face in the huge crowd.

But you know what, I’ve learned to accept it. I’ve accepted the fact that we will never meet each other in this lifetime. I will not be able to hold your hand to comfort you, or hug you tight when you cry. And that’s okay. I love you despite all of that. I never loved you any less. There’s someone out there that will do all of those things for you, and maybe even more. I am not worthy of your heart, but you surely are worth every tear.

One day, you will finally meet someone that you know you want to spend most of your time with. You'd take her out on dates and give her a goodnight kiss when you drop her off her house. You’d give her flowers and chocolates on Valentine’s Day. You’d surprise her on her birthday and maybe travel together. You’d serenade her with your songs with the help of your piano. You’d sing her a lullaby through the phone when she couldn’t sleep at the dead of night. You two would spend the night in the bed with each other’s arms wrapped around one another, cuddling and talking about nothing in particular. Whispering secrets and sweet nothings in each other's ears and would share a hearty laugh because of one of your inside jokes. And one day, you'll come to realize and eventually say to yourself that, "Ah, I'm going to marry her and spend the rest of my life with her." You two will get married and have kids of your own. You two would have a beautiful family together. Wouldn't that be nice?

As I’ve said a while back, I’ve accepted it already. I was not made for you, but you were made to change me.

Yes, you've changed my life completely. You've inspired me in so many ways. You’ve taught me things that no one ever could. My problems and fears would wash away in an instant at the very moment I hear your voice and see your face. You made me genuinely happy, my love. I don't think I would be the person I am today if I did not get the chance to know you. So, thank you for being you. Thank you for existing. 
 

I know that there is no way you could ever read this, and this may seem stupid and nonsense to everyone else, but I just want to put it out there that I do love you. I want to let it out of my chest even with just the use of paper and ink. Everything I’ve said here genuinely came from my heart. These are not just empty words of affection and adoration. This is real for me. Every single sentiment was spoken purely and truthfully by my heart.

I love you, Ryeowook. I’ve loved you before, I love you now, and I will certainly keep on loving you until the end of time. You will forever hold a huge part of my heart, baby.

With everlasting love,

E.L.F.

//AN: Aha, sorry. Was it too long or too short? Sorry if there are grammatical errors. It's been literally seven months since I opened this. I hope you guys enjoyed it! Comments would be loved <3