I Missed You
I Missed You [two-shot fanfic]
2 years have been a long wait for Leeteuk who had been wishing for Kangin to comeback to Super Junior after finishing his military duty.
It was during January 2012 when they finally saw each other again. Leeteuk was the only one in the Super Junior dorm because the members of SJM (Eunhyuk, Sungmin, Donghae, Kyuhyun, Ryeowook and Siwon) were in Taiwan having their first major concert there while Yesung and Shindong were in their respective radio shows (Miracle for You and Shimshimtapa) and Heechul was busy for a commercial photo shoot.
Their doorbell rang. Leeteuk thought it was the pizza delivery guy that he was waiting for but to his surprise it was actually Kangin.
“Kangin-ah~ I missed you so much” Leeteuk said as he ran towards Kangin and hugged him tightly. Leeteuk was so excited seeing Kangin again.
But to his surprise the young man didn’t treat him the way they treat each other before.
“Yah~ stop hugging me. I’m tired.” Kangin protested and pushed Leeteuk so that Leeteuk couldn’t hug him again.
“Yah~ is that a way to treat your hyung after being in the army? What’s your problem?”
Kangin didn’t answer him back and went to his room.
Leeteuk was left in the doorway shocked by how Kangin treated him.
“Yah~ why didn’t you tell us that you’re coming back today? We should have come home earlier.” Heechul said as he talked to Kangin while they were watching television.
“I was planning to surprise you.” Kangin said.
“Yeah, I was surprised.” Leeteuk said in a very sarcastic way.
“Don’t be like that hyung, we should celebrate now that Kangin is back again with us.” Yesung suggested.
“Yeah, let’s drink and have fun.” Shindong suggested too.
“You all go. I’ll just stay here. I’m tired.” Leeteuk told them.
“Well if that’s what you want. Let’s go!”
“KJ~” Heechul teased Leeteuk.
Leeteuk was again alone in their dorm. He climbed up the stairs and go to his room. He still hasn’t forgotten what Kangin did a while ago.
“Why is he isn’t talking to me? What happened to him? Why is he treating me like this? It was like he was a different person after being in the army. I can’t understand what’s happening. I’ll just ask him personally tomorrow.” Leeteuk lay down in his bed but still he couldn’t because he was still thinking about Kangin.
He dreamt about their last moment together before Kangin signed up for the army. They were together in their room, just the two of them making promises to each other.
“I hope we’ll still be like this after 2 years of not being with each other.” Leeteuk told Kangin.
“I will not change. 2 years will just pass by quickly and we’ll be together again.”
“Just promise me that you’ll never forget me and that you’ll stay the same. Yaksokhae?”
“Yaksokhae” Kangin assured Leeteuk.
The next day, Leeteuk and Kangin were the only one the dorm. They were still together in the same room, in the same dorm but not in the same condition. They woke up and looked at each other. Smiling at each other every time they woke up has been a routine for them back then but there was none of them who dared to smile to the other one. Kangin got out of his bed and was going for the door when Leeteuk stopped him. Leeteuk stood in front of the door blocking Kangin.
“Tell me what’s wrong” Leeteuk said gazing at Kangin’s eyes. He couldn’t hold his emotions in. He was actually trembling and might cry anytime.
“Nothing’s wrong.” Kangin said in a mild voice trying not to look at Leeteuk’s gaze.
“Look into my eyes and say that nothing’s wrong”
Kangin looked into his eyes and said, “I told you, NOTHING’S WRONG!”
He pushed Leeteuk away from the door and hurriedly went out.
Leeteuk was left in the room, crying. He never imagined that Kangin would do this to him.
“Mianhae hyung, jeongmal mianhae…” Kangin told himself.
Weeks passed and it was the last week of January. Every member was back in the dorm and was spending their time together. Leeteuk felt as if he was the only one getting the cold treatment from Kangin. Kangin was avoiding him and he doesn’t know why. He was still the same raccoon-smiling guy in front of the other members but not in front of Leeteuk.
Their phone rang. It was Manager-hyungs’ call.
“Yeoboseyo? Oh~ Manager-hyung… Oh~ okay, my things are already packed up and I’m ready to go next week.” Leeteuk said.
Leeteuk still has a week to spend among s before he will sign up and go fulfill his military service and he thinks he can’t go until Kangin tells him what’s wrong.
Days passed, this was the last day that Leeteuk would be in the dorm. Everyone was crying and saying their goodbyes to Leeteuk-hyung except for Kangin. Kangin was nowhere to be found.
“This was the last day and still he hasn’t explained anything to me.” Leeteuk thought to himself.
He was in their room wanting an explanation from Kangin because of his cold treatment to him. It was in the middle of the night when Leeteuk felt someone caressing his hair. To his surprise it was Kangin, the reason he was hurting like this.
“K---Kangin? Why are you still awake? Why aren’t you sleeping?”
“I want to see your face for the last time” Kangin said in a mild tone voice. His cold treatment towards Leeteuk was completely gone.
“Why?”
“You’re going to the army tomorrow, and I will miss you.”
“You’ll miss me? You’re joking right?” Leeteuk said ironically.
“Why? Don’t you believe me?”
“After treating me like this. You think that I’ll still believe you? You haven’t fulfilled your promise to me that you will not change. You’ve change and it was worst than I expected.” Tears were already falling down from Leeteuk’s face. Kangin tried to wipe it away but Leeteuk stopped him from doing it.
“I was only treating you like this because I think that it would be hard to say goodbye to you if we’ll be too close to each other again. It was hard saying goodbye to you when I was the one going to the army and it will be twice as hard for me to say my goodbye to you now, that you’re the one going to the army. You wouldn’t understand---” Kangin wasn’t able to completely finish what he was saying because Leeteuk cut him off.
“YOU’RE A COWARD!!!” Leeteuk shouted.
“I’m not a coward. I’m just afraid that you would go through a lot of pain if I’ll be sweet and nice to you.”
“Haven’t you seen? I’m in pain these days because of you, because of your treatment, because of you ignoring me. I was hurting every time I see you treat the other members like before except me. You don’t know how much pain I am going through because of your selfish act. YOU’RE SO SELFISH!!” Tears were falling in both Leeteuk and Kangin’s face.
Having no words to say, Kangin hugged Leeteuk. Leeteuk tried to get out from Kangin’s hug but he can’t because of Kangin being strong.
“I wanted to tell you that the first time I saw you but I can’t. I was afraid of hurting you again. I can still recall it when I saw you cry so hard when I left Super Junior for the army. I never wanted to see you like that again. Please stop crying. Uljima… I can’t see you like this. I’m sorry for my selfish act. I’m sorry for all the hurt I’ve caused you. I’m sorry----” Kangin was cut off by Leeteuk.
“No need to explain it further. I finally understand you.”
The next morning, Leeteuk woke up in the arms of Kangin who was still asleep. They’re back to their old ways again. Leeteuk played with Kangin’s nose trying to wake him up. Kangin woke up and smiled brightly to Leeteuk. Leeteuk smiled back at him. Kangin kissed Leeteuk in the forehead. Leeteuk said, “I hope we’ll be waking up together again like this. I missed this. I missed your smile. I missed your eyes. And most of all I MISSED YOU…”
“I MISSED YOU, TOO” Kangin answered back.
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