Time seemed to be moving slower than usually. It was as if every second dragged on into a minute and every minute dragged into an hour. Mark glanced back at the clock every few moments and he drummed his fingers over the surface of the living room’s polished coffee table. The red head tried to occupy himself with house chores, like cleaning and cooking. But the house was already spotless and the dinner has been done hours ago. So where was Jinyoung? It’s not a surprise for the slightly younger male to be late, but he usually called Mark and warned him that he will come home late.

            But it has been different lately. The red head waited every evening near the phone because he knew that Jinyoung was going to be late again. He waited for the younger male’s call, but it never came. When did everything change?

            The two of them used to be so in love. They met when Jinyoung was in his sophomore year in high school and Mark was a junior back then. They clicked immediately. It was true when they said that opposites attracted each other. The slightly older male was shy and quiet, while Jinyoung was more sociable and optimistic. Jinyoung was the first one to talk to Mark, because the red head was too shy to go over to his crush and ask him out. Their first date was a bit awkward, but Mark got used to Jinyoung's clingy personality quite quickly. Their first kiss was when they were eating cotton candy and Mark decided to taste the sweet straight from Jinyoung’s lips. The red head still blushed when he remembered the sparks that travelled through his whole body during that kiss. He probably would still feel the sparks if Jinyoung would kiss him. But the truth was that nowadays the closest thing to a kiss was a quick peck on the lips.

            The older male still remembered the first time they made love. It was after their one year anniversary when Jinyoung invited Mark over to his place after they finished their date. They were drinking tea and Jinyoung’s lips looked too tempting and the older male couldn’t resist the urge to lean closer to his boyfriend and to kiss him. When he closed his eyes Mark could still remember the way Jinyoung looked at him with love and adoration. What changed? Why couldn’t Jinyoung look at him like that anymore?

            The red head missed his lover’s laugh. He hadn’t heard it in days, or has it already been weeks? Mark didn’t want to admit it, but Jinyoung was drifting away from him and the mere thought that the younger male didn’t love him anymore brought the red head to tears. What if Jinyoung woke up one day and decided that Mark wasn’t enough for him? What if the younger male found somebody smarter than Mark, somebody more open and cheerful, somebody who would provide more than the red head? What if Jinyoung already found that kind of a person, but he was just pitying Mark and not breaking up with him?

            When the two of them moved in to live together Mark was almost turning twenty and Jinyoung was almost nineteen. The red head was, and still is, studying business and Jinyoung is a vocal’s student. They are studying in different universities, so Mark doesn’t see Jinyoung during the day that much anymore. In the start that was one of the reasons why they moved in to live together. They wanted to be able to see each other at least for some time during every day. And now, it seemed as if Jinyoung didn’t care about seeing his lover’s face and Mark was miserable.

            Jinyoung used to kiss Mark every morning in order to wake him up and then he would giggle hen the red head’s cheeks blushed a fiery shade of red. The older male never got used to the younger one’s light caresses and teasing kisses. They still gave him butterflies in the stomach. But lately Mark has been waking up to an empty side of their bed. And he had to lie to his friends afterwards when they asked why his eyes were red and puffy. He told them that it was an allergy. If Jackson or BamBam knew that Jinyoung made him cry everyday they would probably beat the younger male up. And then Jinyoung would break up with him in no time.

            The red head heard the lock of their apartment doors unlock and an almost inaudible shuffle of feet in the hallway. Jinyoung was probably putting his shoes away in the spot that only he used. Mark turned his head a little bit and saw how Jinyoung walked passed him without sparing a glance. The younger male made his way into the bathroom and the red head could feel a frown forming on his face. Did the younger male not see him? Or was he ignoring him? Mark shook his head and scolded himself. Jinyoung would never ignore him on purpose. The red head’s eyes followed Jinyoung as the younger male made his way to their bedroom and he was one hundred percent sure that there was a frown marring his face.

            Mark stood up from the couch and walked to their shared bedroom after turning the TV off. Not like he was watching anything on it. He probably couldn’t even say what played during the past few hours because he was zooming out all of the time.

            The red head walked into their shared room cautiously and saw Jinyoung already preparing to go to sleep. Mark cleared his throat and looked into Jinyoung’s eyes.

            ‘I made dinner. It’s still in the over. You can heat some up if you want.’ Why did his voice sound so dull? As if it took away all of his strength to talk to the younger male. Maybe that’s what love did to people. It made their lover’s to be their strength and when the lover was neglecting them they lost all of the will to carry on. At least that’s how Mark felt when Jinyoung paid no attention to him. And maybe he was being a little bit too dramatic, but would you feel perfectly fine if your boyfriend or girlfriend would start drifting away from you?

            ‘I’m not hungry; I ate after work with one of the waiters.’ The red head could feel his heart cracking and he shifted his eyes towards the ground. He was sure that Jinyoung saw the hurt in his eyes, but it seemed like the younger male brushed it away. Mark changed into his sleeping attire and climbed into the bed. He laid down next to Jinyoung and the younger male pulled him into his embrace. Usually Mark would be happy with this gesture, but lately it seemed as if Jinyoung was only doing this because it was his duty.

            There were no soft caresses and lingering touches from Jinyoung’s side. Mark had tried to kiss the younger male’s bare shoulders some time ago, but Jinyoung told him that he was exhausted and they should sleep. It hurt Mark more than it should have. And the kiss that Jinyoung laid upon his forehead wasn’t the same kiss that he used to be awarded with when they went to sleep. The red head bit down onto the inside of his cheek in order to fight the tears away. He listened to the way Jinyoung’s heart beat slowed down. The younger male probably fell asleep without any worries, while Mark contemplated about all of the memories they shared together.

            It was no surprise when Mark woke up alone again. He made his way into the kitchen and saw that Jinyoung left him breakfast. At least he did that much for the red head lately. The taste of the food was bitter and Mark pushed the plate away. He washed the taste down with a glass of orange juice and quickly made his way to the University with all of his things in his backpack. He always forgot to set his alarm clock and Jinyoung used to wake him up every morning.

            The red head missed his first lecture and met up with both Jackson and BamBam during the break after the fourth lecture. Something seemed of with his friends. As if they knew something. And Jackson was the one who verified the fact.

            ‘Man, are you alright? It doesn’t look like you slept well.’ The red head nodded his head, but he could still see the way his friends didn’t actually believe him.

            ‘You missed a lecture, you never do that. Did something happen?’ BamBam’s voice sounded concerned and the red head remembered all the times Jinyoung took care of him when he wasn’t feeling well. His eyes glossed over a little bit and this made both of his friends even more alarmed.

            ‘Hey, Mark, you are scaring me. What happened?’ The red head shook his head and a tear slipped down his cheek. He was finally hit full force with the realization that him and Jinyoung may not last for long. Some students looked at him in curiosity and confusion as they passed him. Why wouldn’t they? There was a fully grown man standing in the middle of the hall, crying. That was not something you see every day.

            Jackson made sure that no one followed them while BamBam leaded Mark into a more secluded area. The two younger males had been Mark’s best friends for more than five years and they had never seen the red head cry except when his grandmother passed away. Something serious must have happened and it freaked the two of them out.

            ‘Mark, please tell us what happened.’ The red head choked up a Nothing and Jackson’s eyes hardened. Oh hell nah, his best friend was not going to lie to him about something that made him cry in front of everyone.

            ‘Dude, you never cry. You didn’t even cry when that bully in high school called you a freak. Now spill it.’ The red head shook his head and BamBam took a guess.

            ‘Is it Jinyoung?’ Jackson was about to tell the Thai boy to shut up when Mark started sobbing even more. Hold up, did Jinyoung dare to do something to his best friend? There will be hell to pay if this is true. Jackson kneeled down in front of a sitting Mark and rubbed his shoulders in a gentle way.

            ‘What did that bastard do?’ The red head took in deep breathes and tried to find his voice.

            ‘I just, I don’t think he loves me anymore.’ This surprised both Jackson and BamBam. Jinyoung was always showering the red head with love and attention, so what changed?

            ‘It’s impossible, maybe you are just tired. Jinyoung loves you to death.’ The red head shook his head and the two younger males could see that their friend was breaking apart.

            ‘No, he doesn’t. I can see it whenever I look at him. Whenever we touch there’s nothing of the previous feelings left. It’s as if he is just staying with me because it’s convenient. I’m so stupid. I should let him go because it hurts me more and more every day to see the way we drift apart. It hurts because I am the only one who is trying to save our relationship. I just feel as if I can’t take it anymore. I love him too much.’ The youngest male hugged Mark tightly and Jackson clenched his fists. He had a to hunt down. Nobody hurts his best friend and gets away with it.

            By the end of the day Mark asked them to not tell anything to Jinyoung. BamBam understood why Mark asked them for that, but Jackson fumed about how Jinyoung was not appreciating what he had and that he’ll be crying like a little when the red head moves on.

            The red head was grateful that he did not have work that day, so he made his way home. It was the same as yesterday, or any other day, Jinyoung was not home and Mark ate dinner alone. He didn’t leave the food in the oven as he used to and moved to the living room. He stared at the TV again without watching it. He was too tired emotionally to do anything. He just wanted to fall asleep and to not wake up for a few years.

            As a sappy drama was being shown on one of the channel’s Mark was hit with another sudden realization. Maybe love wasn’t enough for the two of them to stay together. Mark knew that he loved Jinyoung to heaven (more like hell) and back, but it wasn’t always enough. Sometimes love hurts and the red head felt as if his heart was being ripped open. He was tired of all his attempts of getting Jinyoung to spend time with him. What was good in this relationship if Mark was the only one who tried to keep it?

            Mark had wanted to end this relationship for a few weeks already, because it’s been going on like this for months, but whenever he came close to saying goodbye to Jinyoung his heart clenched and he simply couldn’t say it. He couldn’t part ways with the younger male because he loved him too much. It may sound cliché, but Mark did not know how to survive if Jinyoung wasn’t by his side.

            Jinyoung came back home around eleven in the evening and Mark couldn’t help but to look at him as he came over to the living room and sat down next to the red head. This was the most time they spent together during the last weeks and Mark was smiling maybe a little bit too much. But they stayed silent all the time and Mark’s smile slowly twisted into a frown. Is this what they had become? Strangers that didn’t have anything in common? Jinyoung kissed the red head’s forehead before he went into their bedroom and Mark's eyes welled up with tears again.

            The red head curled up into a ball and bit down onto his lips in order to fight the sobs that threatened to come out of his throat.

            Mark fell asleep on the couch and was woken up by noises that were coming from the kitchen. The red head slowly made his way into the room and saw Jinyoung preparing breakfast for them. It seemed as if the younger male noticed him and glanced in his direction.

            ‘You looked comfortable on the couch so I didn’t move you.’ Jinyoung’s voice came out a bit strained and Mark played with the hem of his top.

            ‘What happened to us Jinyoung?’ The younger male looked into Mark’s eyes and he could see the way the red head’s orbs moistened and tears were about to fall. He quickly made his way to the older male and was about to brush his fingers over the red head’s cheek when Mark slapped his hand away from his face.

            ‘Don’t you dare touch me.  I’m sick of this. I’m sick of waiting up for you just to be ignored. I’m sick of being rejected and feeling as if you don’t care anymore. I’m sick of us and the way we turned out.’ Jinyoung quickly wrapped his arms around Mark’s waist and the older boy fought against his hold.

            ‘Baby, I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry. I’ve just been really pressured with studies and work. I shouldn’t have neglected you. Please forgive me.’ The red head could feel tears rolling down his cheeks and was there a wet spot forming on his top’s shoulder’s place? Was Jinyoung crying?

            ‘I’m afraid that a simple sorry won’t cut anymore.’ Jinyoung tightened his hold around Mark even more and shook his head.

            ‘No, don’t say that. Please don’t say that. I love you, I love you with all of my heart Mark. I promise, I will change. I will spend every evening after work with you. Heck, I’ll cut down on work hours if it means that you will forgive me. Just please don’t say that you are tired of what we have.’ The red head sighed and buried his nose into Jinyoung’s neck. He loved the younger male too much to not give him a second chance. The red head nodded his head and he could feel Jinyoung relaxing a little bit.

            The black haired male shifted their position a little bit and kissed Mark on the lips. The spark that Mark remembered was gone, but the butterflies in his stomach still rose. That was at least a good start. Mark smiled a little bit even though he could still smell his own morning breath, Jinyoung could probably too. But it seemed as if the younger didn’t care and he smiled into the kiss too. Maybe it seemed as if they did manage to lose a part of the love they shared, but they had all of the time in the world to find it again. 

 Couldn't help but to involve BamBam and Jackson into this. I just can't stand Got7 and what they do to me.