Hey there, i'm sorry for not updating eailer but , opps sorry, anyway here is the first chp hope you guys enjoy!! oh i want to tell you word like this is xiumin thought , okay?

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pushing my finger as my vision started to get blurred and my head started to start spinning round and round, looking in the toilet bowl as a tear escape from my eye as i see the food i just eat with blood covering it " don't regret it, this make you more perfect" i keep on repeating that thought in my mind as i blink in my tear and sigh.

"hyung, are you okay" baekhyun shouted from the other side of the door"um, yeah" i shout back and depart my eye from the toilet bowl and wash my face as i paint a smile on my face and flush the toilet" no-one can know about this" that was my last thought as i unlock the door." hyung, why are you losing the bathroom so long"whine baekhyun as he rush into the bathroom "you can't tell them" " oh just something" i replied " oh, okay" say he and turn away " i can't tell you, i don't want you to be worried". 

as we dance, i was the only one that making a mistake , " i'm sorry " i cry inside as i see all of them sweating "because me all of you are suffering" . " xiumin, i think you should pay more attention" the dance teacher say as he say that i feel 11 eye staring at me" yes" i say feeling bad about myself " you have no one one to blame but yourself" i though

" your not perfect enough

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here hope you like the first chapter, i'm sorry it very short because i dont have any idea yet but i'l didn't want to keep you wanting so , i decide to ost the first chp, i'm sincerly apizoige for any grammer mistake

have fun reading!!