Title: And Then He Fainted
Pairing: Sehun/Luhan, side!Xiumin/Baekhyun
Word Count: 2,457
Warning: Language, mentions of kinks, probably a couple of other things that I should warn you about but can't think of at the moment (sorry in advance.)
Disclaimer: I don't own Exo, and if Kink Kingdom is a real place, I don't own it either. Also credit for the picture goes to someone who isn't me.
Summary: Sehun decides to surprise Luhan. Unfortunately it doesn't go very well.
A/N: Written for this prompt. Started months ago, finally finished today.


“I’m sorry, what did you just say?” Minseok asked, giving the two men across from him an incredulous look.

The three of them were sitting at a corner table in the usual coffee shop, tabletop currently bare of drinks but full of Minseok as he was half-sprawled on top it. Luhan on the other hand was half-sprawled on Sehun, Sehun’s lanky arms wrapped around his skinny frame and of one Luhan’s legs draped over his thigh.

“I said he fainted,” Sehun repeated, expression stoic as Luhan’s face managed to hit a new shade of red before he turned towards his torso towards Sehun and buried it into his boyfriend’s chest.

“Shut up, Sehunnie! You promised you wouldn’t tell!” The Chinese man whined, voice muffled by Sehun’s shirt and shoulders hunched in obvious embarrassment. Luhan was easily ignored.

“He came home and fainted?” Minseok stated, eyebrows disappearing beneath his fringe in obvious skepticism as he peered up at them from where his head rested lazily on his arms. “Just like that? I don’t understand. What does that have to do with you stealing my boyfriend last week?”

“There’s more to it than that,” Sehun told him while Luhan let out a quiet, embarrassed whimper. Minseok wasn’t really surprised when Sehun didn’t immediately elaborate, his god-like patience finally snapping ten minutes later after their orders were called out and he got up to retrieve them.

“ing explain, child!” He snapped, setting the coffee’s on the table and plopping down uncerimoneously back in his seat.

Sehun gave him a small, petulant frown, his hold on Luhan visibly tightening for a moment before he gave a small sigh and shook his head. “I don’t want to anymore.”

“It’s none of your business, anyways,” Luhan added, finally leaving the safety of Sehun’s chest to shoot Minseok a nervous glare. “It was just some stupid thing and not a big deal, like, at all, so off and drink your coffee!”

Minseok gave him a hard stare, arm landing on the table as if he was ready to jump across it and break his friend’s face for such insolence, and after a moment Luhan gave an incoherent mumble and pressed himself further into Sehun as if Sehun was capable of saving him.

Deciding that his message had been well received, Minseok allowed himself a small, victorious smile before relaxing and taking a sip of his latte.

“It was funny,” Sehun told Minseok blankly after a few silent minutes, apparently over his bratty episode. “I’m surprised your boyfriend hasn’t told you yet.”

“Don’t tell him!” Luhan shouted, ignoring the irritated glance he received from the lady at the table next to their’s and instead sending Sehun a betrayed glare. “You promised!”

Sehun gave him a blank look. “But he asked why I stole his boyfriend last week.”

“I don’t care,” Luhan groaned, dropping his forehead onto Sehun’s shoulder in defeat.

“He’s curious.”

“It’s embarrassing!”

“But-”

“Is it as embarrassing as Kris’ existence?” Minseok asked interestedly, and Luhan nodded seriously.

“No it’s not,” Sehun said, though neither man was sure just who it was he was talking to. “Nothing is more embarrassing than Kris’ existence.”

Minseok shrugged. “Yeah, good point.”

“Luhan has a leather ,” Sehun added, watching on impassively as Minseok rolled his eyes and Luhan cringed against his side.

“I know,” Minseok stated, taking another drink of his latte, “I’ve seen his collection.” Sehun allowed himself another small frown. “What, did you just find out or something?”

“It’s embarrassing,” Luhan repeated, pouting against Sehun’s shoulder. “Why the hell would I tell anyone?”

Minseok shrugged again. “Still not as embarrassing as Kris’ existence.”

Luhan responded with a heavy sigh.

“He has a leather ,” Sehun said again, blinking sluggishly. “That’s why he fainted.”

Minseok stared at him. Sehun stared back.

“The ,” Minseok stated flatly, crossing his arms expectantly over his chest.

“Don’t tell him,” Luhan mumbled, digging his forehead deeper into Sehun’s shoulder. “Don’t you dare.”

Sehun gave a contemplative sigh before bobbing his head in admittance. “At Yixing’s party a couple weeks ago...”




...Luhan had gotten drunk. Very, very drunk. Not the kind of drunk that Sehun was fond of - the cute kind of drunk where he’d be all sweet and overly-affectionate and adorable, but the other kind of drunk.

Specifically, the kind of drunk that made him unable to walk properly, causing Sehun to be forced into giving his boyfriend a piggy back ride despite the fact that he wasn’t one hundred percent sober himself.

Sehun had to carry them all the way back to their apartment, seriously injuring himself and stubbing his poor, innocent toes many times in the process. He was a gracious, loving boyfriend however, and did it with minimal complaints. He even went so far as to tuck Luhan into bed and get a glass of water and some Advil ready for him in the morning before getting into bed as well.

It was while they were lying there, both on the cusp of sleep, that Luhan had burst into tears and told Sehun his deepest, darkest secret. He had a thing for leather. And whips. And was apparently under the impression that that made him some kind of ert.

As a gracious, loving boyfriend, Sehun had cuddled him comfortingly until he cried himself to sleep before taking the time to seriously consider Luhan’s confession.

In all honesty, after three years together their life had gone a little stale, and the thought of trying something different sounded kind of exciting. Of course, Sehun didn’t really know where to find the kind of heavy-duty equipment he would need for something like that, but he was friends with Byun Baekhyun so it wouldn’t be too difficult to find out.

And maybe, Sehun thought, still half-drunk and staring at the dark ceiling with Luhan curled up against him, he could make it even more interesting. He’d learned early on in their relationship that Luhan had a thing for dominating him (which was just as well, because Sehun had a thing for being dominated), and maybe with a little research he could make that work too.

But then again, maybe he should hold off a little - it would just be an experiment, after all. He didn’t want to overdo it on the first try and give Luhan a heart attack.

Baekhyun, as it turned out, was of a different opinion. “You should always go all out the first time,” he exclaimed after Sehun brought up his plan during their shared lunch break. “That way you can figure out what works and what doesn’t! There’s this place off of 3rd Street called Kink Kingdom - what are you doing after work tomorrow?”

And so it began, with Baekhyun jumping into Sehun’s endeavors with more excitement than Sehun felt was strictly necessary given their generally normal friendship.

Kink Kingdom ended up being everything that its name implied and more, and Baekhyun was disturbingly helpful, even promising not to tell his boyfriend about the plan, since everyone knew Minseok couldn’t keep a secret and Sehun wanted it to be a surprise.





“I resent that,” Minseok stated blandly, half-empty coffee cup cradled in his hand. Luhan had run off to hide in the bathroom nearly as soon as Sehun began his story, and the lady at the table next to them was obviously listening in because she hadn’t turned a page in her book for almost five minutes despite the fact that she was still staring down at it.

Sehun shrugged.

“I’m also a little upset that Baekhyun took you to Kink Kingdom,” he added with a frown. “He made me boycott it after he had to overpay for a double-headed - what a ing hypocrite. We’ll be having some words later.”

Sehun shrugged again.

Minseok shrugged back. “Sorry. Please continue.”

“Where was I?” Sehun asked, finishing off the tea in his cup.

“I gossip,” Minseok answered, jutting out his lip in a dramatic pout. “Which isn’t true at all.”

Sehun gave a slow nod. “Right. Well, as I’m sure you know we got a little carried away...





...and Sehun ended up blowing nearly five hundred bucks and an unknown number of hours with Baekhyun on his surprise. It took almost an entire week to plan out and many trips to Kink Kingdom, but Sehun was sure it would be worth it.

Of course, he hadn’t gone as crazy with the equipment as Baekhyun had obviously hoped, but it wasn’t so bad. He was covering a few of them - ones that he knew Luhan would enjoy and a couple that he wasn’t so sure either of them would.

After much time, energy, and money, the day Sehun had been preparing for finally arrived. He got out of work an hour early to make sure that he’d be done setting up by the time Luhan made it home, and spent the entire bus ride home being reminded by Baekhyun via text not to forget anything.

Thankfully, it wasn’t as long of a list as it could’ve been.

When he did finally make it back to the apartment, he wasted no time in getting ready. He took a quick shower (because of course one needed to be clean for these kinds of things), and then proceeded with the first item on his agenda.

Because it had been a slow day at work (and because Sehun was inexperienced) Baekhyun had put eyeliner on him before he left the office while giving him a verbal tutorial on how to apply make-up. This had caused a few raised eyebrows on the bus, though Sehun had neither noticed nor cared. What he did care about was that the label had clearly stated that it was ‘waterproof’ and yet when he stepped out of the shower it was smudged all around his eyes.

This became increasingly problematic when he attempted to fix it only to make the whole thing worse. Between that and putting on the rest the smoky crap Baekhyun had assured him would ‘make his everything stand out’, he ended up being way behind schedule, and rushed to make sure everything would be ready in time.

Along with the makeup, Baekhyun had coerced him into buy women’s attire (“Cross-dressing is a worldwide favorite, okay? Just trust me, bro.”) and so he slipped on a black leather spanking skirt, a truly difficult corset, and a pair of thigh-high high-heeled boots that caused him to wobble precariously as soon as he stood up.

Digging into the bags he’d secretly been stashing underneath the bed (The one place Luhan would never go, because he had a thing about small dark spaces) he grabbed the studded leather collar and chain-link leash that Baekhyun had also urged him into purchasing (“You said he likes dom/sub, right? Petplay fits that category, and some others. Just ing trust me, Sehun.”) and was just starting to debate how tight to make the collar around his neck when he heard the telltale sound of the front door opening.

Sehun’s eyes darted to the clock on the nightstand and he began to silently despair. Luhan had obviously gotten off of work early as well and Sehun wasn’t ready yet.

What about the riding crop Baekhyun had talked him into (“Whips, bro. Trust me.”), and how was he supposed to position himself?

Sehun’s boot collided hard with the bedframe as he jumped headfirst onto the mattress, looking around wildly for a good idea.

“Sehunnie?” Luhan called from the living room, obviously having heard Sehun’s mistake, and in a state of panic Sehun hurriedly clipped the leash onto the collar and tied the end of it to the headboard. He’d just gotten into the prime position - on his hands and knees on top of the blankets facing towards the bedroom door - when Luhan appeared.

He stopped in the doorway, staring at Sehun with wide eyes and a slacked jaw.

“Eureureong.” Sehun tried, frowning when it came out flat and disinterested. He furrowed his eyebrows and tried again. “Awoo.” Dammit!

Luhan began opening and closing his mouth in an attempt to speak, eyes wide and unblinking at he continued to stare at Sehun in shock, and he barely managed to squeak out “Wh-Wh-What...?” before sniffling. Then sniffling again. Looking torn between confusion and elation, Luhan raised his hand and swiped his fingers under his nose.

He looked at them. From Sehun’s position on the bed it was difficult to see, but eventually he managed to look at them too. Luhan’s nose had begun to bleed. Luhan let out another squeak, now looking at the red on his fingers in horror as dark red blood trickled down onto his upper lip -





“- And then he fainted,” Sehun repeated for the third time in an hour, allowing himself a small pout.

Minseok snickered. “Yeah, that sounds about right.”

The lady at the table next to them had put down the book and was openly staring at them now, her hand pressed hard against in what was either hysteria or horror. Luhan had yet to return from the bathroom, and both men were fairly sure that he’d escaped out of the window and that Sehun would most likely find him curled up on the couch in their apartment, dying from embarrassment.

“All of that money wasted,” Sehun continued with a sigh. “So burdensome.”

“It’s Baekhyun’s fault,” Minseok pointed out, and Sehun nodded.

“Yes, I came to that conclusion as well. I don’t understand what you see in him.”

Minseok shrugged. “Believe me, I’ve seen everything in him.”

Sehun took a moment to contemplate Minseok’s words before letting out a hum of sudden understanding. “I didn’t want to know that.”

“I didn’t want to have the image of you cross-dressing in my head, but here we are and and things can never be un-heard.”

Sehun nodded in agreement. “Yeah, I guess so. You should buy me some more tea,” he added, sending Minseok an expectant look.

Minseok only scoffed. “Buy it yourself you cheap bastard.”

“I can’t,” Sehun admitted with slumped shoulders. “I spent all of this month’s paycheck on ist crap and make-up. I’m broke until next Friday.”

Minseok sighed.