I can't remember the last time you were in my arms, I can't remember the last time you said "Saranghaeyo Yeobo" in your own specific way, I can't remember anything, it feels like everything dissapeared from my life, you know why? because you were,are and will be my life forever. I don't wanna sound cheesy but that's how I feel and I'm not gonna hide it.

Whenever I see you around Amber,smiling, my heart aches like it's been stabbed by a hot sharp knife multiple times. You never smiled like that when you were around me, maybe I wasn't a good boyfriend,maybe I wasn't able to make you happy,maybe I wasn't what you needed. The worst part, the part that kills me everyday and everynight is knowing that I'm alone like I used to be when I was young.

The warm nights we used to spend together are now cold and lonely, I grab my covers and clench my fingers around them all the time. I try to cope with this situation,I try to hold back my tears,I try so hard to do it but I always fail. I can't go to Minho or Taemin since I know they are a happy couple, I don't want to bother them with my sadness and loneliness. 

The Teddy Bear I gave you... You left it here,in my room. You never came back for it, you wanted to get rid of it,didn't you? I don't know what to think anymore, I feel like everything is spinning round and round, it feels like I don't belong here.

I wish I could hold you in my arms one last time, I wish I could kiss your lips like I used to, I wish I could say "Good Nighty My Baby Bummie!" one last time. All these wishes...I can't make them come true, you'd hate me even more. Now...I'm lying down,not knowing what to do, I feel how the loneliness surrounds me, I can feel chills down my spine and hot tears running down my cheeks, the cheeks you used to kiss whenever you were way too shy to kiss my lips in public.

It's over, it's all over,I want to go back,I want to go back to the day we had that stupid fight,I want so many things, I feel like a kid who wants every single toy he sees with his eyes, but I only want one thing for real, YOU!

That's all I had to say, I know you won't even care, but at least I feel a little better and baby, I will love you forever!